Games, changes, and fears
When will they go from here
When will they stop?

Joey paraded proudly down the hallway, walking with a confidence she'd never known she had. People stared at her as she passed, the second day in a row she had held her head high.

She knew that she had hurt Pacey the night before. It had felt good for a little while, when she was still riding the natural high of telling someone off. But eventually common sense and guilt kicked in. She was, however, determined not to let it bother her.

Jen was standing at her locker, her mouth agape at the sight of Joey, strutting down the hall.

"Hey Jen," she said cheerfully as she passed.

"Joey," she replied to Joey's back. Dawson came and stood beside her.

"Scary, isn't it?"

"What is she, on drugs or something?"

"I have no idea."

I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together
But we're not

Pacey walked into the surprisingly empty nurse's office, looking forlorn and tired. Miss Walsh, the nurse, looked up.

"Morning, Pacey."

"Good morning," he said. Then he covered up his mouth as he yawned. "Do you think I could lie down for a while? I didn't get much sleep last night."

"Sure, Pacey. Any special reason you didn't get any sleep?"

"My brother went out to answer a call about a prowler at about eight. It turned out to be a fluke, so he went out to have a couple of drinks with friends. He didn't come home until four. My whole family was up worried sick, and of course they kept me awake, too."

"All right, how long is your study?"

"I'm not in study, I'm in math."

"How did you get out of class?"

"I have a stomachache."

She laughed. "I bet you do."

"Are you calling me a liar?"

"Go to sleep, Pacey."

Pacey fluffed the pillow wrapped in a butcher-type paper and sat down on the teal, plastic couch. He pulled the purple and blue plaid blanket over himself and closed his eyes.

I play it off but I'm dreaming of you
I'll keep my cool but I'm fiendin.

Fifteen minutes later, Pacey was still wide awake, only with his eyes closed. He let out a frustrated cry and sat up.

"Can't sleep?"

"How'd you guess?"

"Probably the fact that you're not sleeping right now."

Pacey chuckled halfheartedly. "I'm too tired to sleep."

"What?"

"Sometimes, when I'm really exhausted, I just lay awake for hours. Like my body just doesn't have the energy to turn everything off."

"Sounds fun."

"And with a social life like mine, sleep is the highlight of my day."

"Oh, don't give me that crap, Pacey. I think you're much more of a social butterfly than you think. I don't buy the Pacey Witter sob-story."

"Social butterfly? Moi?"

"I see you in the hallways, Pacey. You have friends."

"Yeah, about five of them."

"Where do you get this 'everyone hates me' attitude, Pacey? People like you. You're the class clown, the charmer. Where's your self-esteem?"

"I think they removed it when I was born."

"Pacey, stand up and look at yourself in the mirror."

"Why?"

"Just do it." Reluctantly, he got up and stood in front of the full length mirror that was hanging from a closet door. "What do you see?"

"A too-tall, kinda chubby slacker with oily skin, bad hair, and a big nose."

"Where do you see any of that? I see a tall, handsome, kind, intelligent student who could achieve anything he wanted if he just took off the blinders that prevented him from really seeing himself."

"I'm wearing blinders?!"

"You have this horribly distorted image of who you are, Pacey. You look at all the things you can't change. And you exaggerate them, too."

"Exaggerate? Me? I speak nothing but the truth when I give you a physical description of the guy I'm looking at."

"Pacey, please, no one sees you like that. Well, maybe the slacker bit, but that's your own fault. For a while there you had your average pulled way up. What happened?"

"My girlfriend..."

"That's your problem. You can't chuck your personal issues at the door and throw yourself into your work. If you did that life would be a lot easier."

"But everyone that is in my 'personal life' is right here at school. And when I see them, I can't just whip out my math book or something."

"That's not at all what I'm suggesting. You just need to focus on school when you're in school. If you have to, just ignore the people that are stressing you out."

"Ignore Joey Po ... nevermind." He straightened his slightly wrinkled shirt and gave a small smile. "I feel better. I think I'm going to go back to class."

"Pacey, wait."

"Bye, Miss Walsh."

I try to say good-bye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near

As Pacey stumbled out of the nurse's office with his head down, he crashed directly into Joey Potter.

Books went flying and Pacey instantly dropped to his knees, apologizing profusely. He began picking up her books and handing them to her, never looking at her face.

"Sorry," he said once more. Joey frowned and bit her lip. He can't even look at me anymore, she thought sadly.

"No, Pace. I'm sorry."

Even that didn't make him take his eyes off the floor. Without a word he walked away from her. Obviously it would take more than a simple apology to make up for the things she had said. Apparently it would also take more than cutting school to avoid her, too.

That whole day she had felt completely horrible about herself. And worse yet, Pacey had told Dawson and Jen what happened. Now they thought she was nuts, too.

There had to be some way to explain to him what was going on. Some way to make him see that she hadn't meant anything she said to him.

I may appear to be free
But I'm just a prisoner of your love
I may seem alright and smile when you leave
But my smiles are just a front

"If she sits here, I swear to god," Pacey said to Dawson and Jen. He shook his head vigorously. "She's coming over."

Jen smiled. "She's got nerve."

"Come on, it's just Joey."

Pacey snorted. "No, it's Joey from hell."

"You're only saying that because she rejected you," Dawson quipped. Pacey's face fell and he suddenly became interested in his lunch. Jen shook her head disapprovingly at Dawson. "What?"

Joey dropped her tray onto the table loudly. "Hi."

Dawson and Jen greeted her with cheerful hellos. Pacey didn't say anything or look up. Joey thought for a minute that he might leave. But he didn't exactly have anywhere to go.

"Nice to see you, too, Pacey," she said nastily. He didn't respond or show emotion of any kind. "Are you deaf or something?"

Jen giggled. "I think you're getting the silent treatment."

"That's really mature." Still nothing. She needed something. She wanted him to get mad at her, to tell her what a bitch she was. "Fine, be that way."

Joey sat down. She looked from Dawson to Jen, but neither one of them would make eye contact with her. "This is going to be pleasant," she mumbled.

Pacey finally looked up. "We were fine until you got here, Josephine. No one wants you to sit with us. So, do us all a favor and find some other victims." He glared at her, looking directly into her eyes.

"You can't make me leave."

"No, I can't. But don't expect anyone to acknowledge you or anything, Miss Thing. We're not here to entertain you."

Joey heard Dawson and Jen snicker. Her cheeks were a flaming pink with embarrassment. She had pushed way too many buttons.

"Pacey, if you can't deal with me not wanting to go out with you..."

"I can deal just fine. What I can't deal with is someone who gets off on hurting her friends."

"You mean you."

"Fuck you, Jo. Did you expect me to act positive about being put down?! Humiliated?!" His voice was raising and drawing a lot of attention.

"Pacey, we're not alone, we can't do this here."

"I don't give a crap. You're sick, Jo. When someone tells you they love you and they think you're wonderful, they don't want to hear how unattractive and terrible they are." He scowled and picked up his things. "Obviously you're skull is about as thick as your Wonder Bra, so I'll leave."

He stood up, knocking over his chair, and stormed out. People clapped and cheered as he left. Even Dawson and Jen had to bite their cheeks to keep from laughing. Joey thought she might cry.

Here is my confession
May I be your possession?
Boy I need your touch
Your love kisses and such
With all my might I try
But this I can't deny

END OF PART 2

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