EXERCISE???
It is well documented
that for every minute that you exercise, you add one
minute to your
life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional
5 months in a
nursing home at $5000 per month.




The only reason I would take up
exercising is
so that I could hear heavy breathing
again.
I joined a health club last year, spent
about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a
pound. Apparently you have to show up.
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I have to exercise early in the morning
before my brain figures out what I'm
doing.
I like long walks, especially when they
are taken by people who annoy me.
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately
my stomach covers them.
The
advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.


If you are going
to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.
My
grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she's 97
years old and we
don't know where the hell she is.
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And
last but not least:
I don't exercise
because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.
You could run this
over to your friends but why not just e-mail it to them!
