Impatience- November 1999

If I push, we'll crumble together
In a house of cards
melting sticky sugar candy
I can wait.

I hear your voice in every song
Every memory's echo
Your name on my tongue all too often
Simple consonants lighting something
in my eyes.

I don't write you sonnets
(Or at least you don't know I do)
I don't throw myself on you
I just... stand close.
Lean in. Smile. Laugh gently.
Listen to you.
My hand conveniently within holding distance
Though you don't reach out.

It's enough. Your voice
And your hands
And your smile and your
eyes.
It's enough.
I can wait.

I can wait.
Despite moments of madness
And desperate tears of frustration,
Unable to keep my pent up need chained
Locked safe in my diary
Thinking of you until my eyes hurt

Singing for you with the radio
Until my throat aches.
Losing time between the folds of my eyelids
Drifting on your thoughts.
Praying for you to be impatient
Praying for you to be mine.

But time cures all uncertainty.
We're young, we're close, we're friends
Trembling on the edge of almost-something.
I... can... wait.
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