We have suffered the enormous loss of mother, friend, activist, Kathy Worthington. Kathy led a life of unusual strength, compassion, and leadership. Her legacy is immeasurable, and we will miss her terribly.
In 1989 Kathy came out as a lesbian. She immediately immersed herself in the gay community and soon gained celebrity status via her prominent role as a gay rights activist. She organized women�s social and support groups, planned political rallies and was on the board of the Utah Stonewall Center in its early days. She founded the Womyn�s Community Newsletter in April of 1991, which was published for four years. This influential publication played a pivotal role in creating a cohesive lesbian community in Utah.
In 1992 Kathy�s heart was utterly won over by Sara Hamblin, the woman whom Kathy described as her �wife, life partner and best friend.� The two participated in political rallies, marched in Washington, and were married at �The Wedding,� the huge group union ceremony performed at the 1993 March on Washington for gay rights. Kathy and Sara were legally married in Canada in 2003. In their 14 years together they traveled widely, visiting 17 countries as well as much of the U.S.
Sara was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1995. They immediately became experts on the disease. Through their studies and determination, they successfully fought off the disease for 11 years. After a battle with the U.S. Postal Service, her employer from 1986 to her death, Kathy was granted leave in May of 1997 to care for Sara during her cancer treatments, a highly celebrated victory for the gay community. Sara died at home in Taylorsville on February 21, 2006 with Kathy and their family by her side.
Kathy�s reach extended beyond even her own imagining. Her name is everywhere, from her direct and poignant postings regarding Sara�s battle with breast cancer on bcmets.org, to her prominent work in the ex-Mormon community. She was the founder and administrator of the preeminent website providing information on resignation from the Mormon Church, www.mormonnomore.com. Her work in the gay community cannot be overstated.
Kathy�s generosity reached even further. She agreed to translate for a woman who was shot by her husband. Once, while discussing this series of events, Sara summed up Kathy�s irrepressible drive to reach out to others: �Kathy gets confused about words sometimes. Maybe in Spanish the word �translate� means to take someone under your wing and do everything you possibly can for them, no matter what time of day or night, no matter the distance, no matter the danger. If that�s what the word means, then Kathy did an excellent job of �translating.��
Kathy was a healing and informative force unleashed upon the world. Kathy changed lives, from Sara�s, who said she went from being in the closet to �out on the front porch with spot lights turned on,� to close friends, to those she never even met through her work in the community and on her websites.
Kathy is preceded in death by her wife, Sara Hamblin, their �Big Boy� Chiffy, mother Luella, father Dale and brothers Rick and Allen. She is survived by daughters, Cristy and Lucy, former husband Rudy Ju�rez (Ronnie), sister Dolly (Larry), brothers Marty (Gayleen) and Craig (Debra), and her cats Missy and Squeaky. Jude, Dianna, Kathy, Annette, Chuck, Penny, Mandy, Marie and Misty are special friends who were very close to Kathy, and have been especially supportive in this last year. Marilyn knows what comfort she brought to Kathy, and her family is overwhelmed by their appreciation for her. Special thanks to Margie and Alma for their support. Kathy�s family extends their thanks to those who loved and followed Kathy through her eventful and influential life. Kathy�s wish was to be cremated and her ashes joined with Sara�s. The two were never meant to be separated. A memorial for those who wish to celebrate Kathy�s life will be held Sunday, March 4, 6-8pm at the I.J. and Jeann� Wagner Jewish Community Center at 2 North Medical Drive, SLC; 581-0098. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to the Utah Pride Center (www.utahpridecenter.org) or Best Friends Animal Sanctuary (www.bestfriends.org).
�Sometimes I feel downright wealthy,� Kathy once said. �We are managing to do so many things that are exciting and fun that I feel very fortunate.� Those of us whose lives were touched by Kathy�s spirit feel just as fortunate to have known her.
Years later the disease spread to her liver, in 2005 it spread to her bones and in 2006 it spread to her brain. We feel really lucky that Sara lived as long as she did, although it is becoming more common for women to live for years with advanced breast cancer.
As the disease progressed, Sara went from one treatment to the next. In mid January of 2006 Sara went on hospice, which meant we had accepted that she was in her final days. She died the evening of Feb 21st.
In the weeks before Sara died, friends, coworkers and family helped to brighten up her days with their phone calls, cards and visits. She and I tried to enjoy as many moments as we could each day.
THE INTERNET
The internet was a wonderful resource for us from the beginning of our journey with breast cancer. We were able to be truly informed about up-to-date treatment options and about other things that are important to people living with breast cancer. We are convinced that some of the information we obtained over the years extended Sara's life and improved the quality of life that she had.
We highly recommend bcmets.org as a valuable resource for people who have metastatic breast cancer or for people who care about someone who has the disease.
I started doing this because in 1991 people started coming to me for information about how to resign. The number of people asking for help got too large for me to handle personally, so I created MormonNoMore.com. There are other websites and other people and organizations who also give out information about how to resign. Church leaders don't give out numbers about how many people leave the church and I won't attempt to make any guesses here about how many people actually resign from the church each year.
No matter what your reason is for leaving the church, if you want to 'get your name off the records', my website can be a big help.http://www.MormonNoMore.com.
Breast cancer info: bcmets.org
Why do people leave the Mormon church? exmormon.org
If YOU want to resign from the Mormon church:
MormonNoMore.com
Click here for articles about gay issues or about the Mormon church, or both.
Please be sure to tell me that you're writing to me about Kathy and Sara's home page. Thanks.
