| One Year Later |
| On my one year protocol visit, a local news station accompanied me to do a story in their "Healthwatch" portion of the local news. My surgeon (as usual) answered questions in a very knowledgeable and professional manner. He did notice a bit of tremor in my left side, made some new adjustments, gave me the usual hug, and said I'd not need to return unless I had problems. Well, the changes made were not good, as I continue to notice that tremor in my left side, falls are becoming more frequent, and my voice continues to strain. I will not be returning to work this fall, as I will be taking a medical sabbatical for one year. It was a hard decision to make, but one that in all fairness to my school district, was the correct choice at this time. The disease continues to progress. I have accepted what my possibilities for my future without a cure could be. Everyday brings new challenges and accommodations to my lifestyle. I am not afraid of this, but I am sad. My family members are the ones that concern me. My parents and sisters (with their older children) seem to understand and are my constant source of understanding, but mostly venting my frustrations and bouts of depression. My husband does not seem to be able to know what his changing role as a husband/caregiver should be. He is afraid of my future. My children are struggling to understand what is happening to me. I do wish they could help me more, but I am not sure how much of a burden to place on them--after all they are only 8 and 11 years old. I try to do little bits of things each day, as I know that if I should try to accomplish too much on the days that I'm feeling somewhat "normal", I will pay in the form of several days of extreme fatigue--to the point where I sleep for days at a time. It's one of those accommodations that I still am trying to balance. |