Max watched Liz�s face as she absorbed this latest bombshell. She frowned slightly, as though she was trying to understand what this meant.

"Ava?" she finally whispered, sounding sad. "I guess your memories of her were right. You must have really loved her�to want to give up the throne."

Max smiled slightly. He couldn�t help it. The truth was so obvious to him, had been from the first time he had heard about Kadiya, but he was not surprised that Liz wouldn�t recognize it.

She didn�t know about Antar after all, did not know what he had learned about the way that Antarians could mate, bond. She was human.

In this life anyway.

"Not Ava," Max told her. She blinked.

"Really? Then who?" She sounded interested again, and slightly put out if Max was not mistaken. Ava she was willing to understand. Liz had always accepted that Tess/Ava was the one he was supposed to be with. But hearing that there was yet <>another� She was not happy about it. He felt another little flash of hope, like the ones that had been hitting him every so often whenever she slipped. Because she had slipped a lot during their conversation.

Liz was not ambivalent to him. And, if he was not mistaken, she was a little jealous now.

Well, she didn�t know. And he didn�t know if he should tell her. It might just upset her even more. He had promised her that he was not going to try and convince her to leave Dan, and he wouldn�t.

Because he knew that if he told her the truth - the truth about so many things - she would seriously feel compelled to rethink that decision. He didn�t know if he could ask her to do that, even though he wanted to more than he wanted anything in this or any other world.

Telling her� It would be the height of selfishness. He was good at being selfish, always had been, as Zan and as Max. But he couldn�t be selfish about this. Not when it meant disrupting her entire life.

Liz was still staring at him, her arms folded, clearly impatient to hear the rest of his story. "Her name was Kadiya," he told her quietly. "He met her at a party. From the first moment he laid eyes on her he knew she was the one for him."

He had always known it�even in this life, before he remembered her.

Because when he had found out about her � about Kadi � he had remembered. He had remembered seeing her on Dimitras rock, standing with her mistress, Ava, noticing him at the exact same moment he had noticed her. He had remembered that everything Larek had told him about Ava at the Museum the night he had first remembered who he thought was Ava, had actually been about Kadiya�that Larek had made the same mistake that night, at the party.

Max had even remembered his horror when Larek had introduced him to Ava, as though it was she he had wanted to see, wanted to fall to his knees in front of, wanted to beg to marry him. Because the future king could not have fallen instantly in love with a servant girl. Not even a future king as peculiar and unhappy as Zan had been.

It just could not happen.

But it had. And he had been willing to change the entire governmental structure of his planet so that he could be with her.

Few on Antar had known about Kadiya, not even Larek, not after that original mistake had been made. They all just thought he was going crazy with all the talk of ending the monarchy, of bringing equality to the planet. And he had told almost no one�not even Vilandra. He had worried that if they knew, they would kill her, take her away, do something to her to stop him from doing what he knew had to be done to save his soul and, in the long run, his planet.

Max refocused on Liz, who was speaking. "But Zan ended up with Ava," she said. When Max nodded, she sighed heavily, sounding disappointed, like she wanted him to have been with the one he loved, even if only in that past life that she was positive she had not been a part of. "How?"

"It was a huge disaster. Kadi was not of the Blood, being a servant. The social hierarchy in the system was strict. He couldn�t be with her. And everyone seemed to think that it was Ava he wanted." Max shook his head, rolling his eyes. "Obedience to duty was demanded of everyone in Antarian society, even the king. Ava was suitable and so Zan was supposed to love her. But he didn�t."

"What happened?" Liz�s dark eyes were wide, pained, as though this was all bringing back memories she would rather forget. Memories like hearing in the pod chamber that he was destined for someone else, memories of finding out that being with him would end the world, memories of learning that he had impregnated someone else, that he had not saved himself for her.

"His sister, Vilandra, tried to stop him. Because she found out about Kadiya."

"Isabel?" Liz asked. "But why?"

Max shook his head ruefully. "Zan might have been willing to give up the throne, but he had a hard time not playing king. It was the position he was raised for after all." When Liz shook her head, not understanding, he continued, "Vilandra was betrothed to Rath � Michael � one of Zan�s best friends and his most trusted general. It was an extremely important alliance for Zan�not only because of his love for Rath, but also because Rath was willing to support the abolishment of the monarchy because he knew about Kadi, understood about her. Rath was in love with Vilandra, you see, but Lonnie didn�t love him. She was madly infatuated with Khivar, Rath�s brother. She begged Zan to break off the engagement, but Zan refused to hurt Rath that way, especially because he didn�t trust Khivar, rightly I might add. But, I�m ashamed to say though, it was mainly because he didn�t want to give up the alliance the marriage would bring about. Because it was one step closer to getting what he wanted."

"So she helped Khivar overthrow you?" Liz sounded incredulous. "I can�t imagine Isabel ever doing that!"

"She was driven to it, Liz," Max explained. He searched for a way to make her understand what it had been like for his sister. Max was still trying to deal with it himself, what he had done to her in that past life of his, but he wanted Liz to know � needed for her to know � if only to absolve himself a little bit. "Do you remember the way Izzy and I were towards each other right after Alex died?" He saw Liz flinch at the mention of Alex, closed his eyes briefly as a spasm of guilt ran through him. The guilt about Alex was still as fresh as it had been the day he had first learned the truth about Tess.

"I remember," Liz finally managed to say. "She wanted to go away to school and you wouldn�t let her."

"You also remember the way I ordered you around then?" Max continued, not willing for her to forget it. He had been an ass, deserved every shred of guilt it still invoked in him. "Well, imagine that doubled, tripled. In his efforts to protect Rath, Zan drove Vilandra straight into the enemy camp. Khivar made sure she found out about Kadiya�he knew because Rath trusted his brother with the story, not knowing that he was a traitor. Lonnie found out that Zan was going to democratize the planet for his love and she lost it. She literally went insane with rage that he would force her into a marriage against her will and yet betray everything they had been raised to be because of his love."

"Good Lord," Liz breathed. Max could see she was imagining what it must have been like. "And so she helped Khivar."

"She didn�t know what he was. Even Zan wasn�t sure until the very end or he might still have been able to stop him. But Khivar arranged it so Ava caught Zan and Kadiya together. He also leaked news of Zan�s intentions regarding the throne to the leaders of the other planets, which brought him their support, at least until he killed Zan."

"What happened to Vilandra and the others?" Max tried to ignore her hand, which had found its way onto his arm again. Liz had not changed at all it seemed. She was still tuned in to the pain of those around her, felt his over what had transpired in his family, his guilt that he had been responsible for it all. She wanted to comfort him, even if she knew it was dangerous.

And she had to know it was. If she was feeling even half what he was feeling in her presence, touching him was not safe.

His voice caught momentarily in his throat as he tried to speak. His entire attention was focused on her hand, reflecting on how annoying it was that he had not only his jacket between her fingers and his skin, but his damn shirt as well. He cleared it, felt heat beginning to rise into his face, not from embarrassment but, rather, from the attempt not to grab her hand and pull her into his arms.

How could one small hand do this? It was crazy.

It�s Liz, a small voice in the back of his mind reminded him. It�s not crazy. It�s only natural.

It was natural, but also dangerous. He might be willing to put her desires first, but he was not a machine. If there was one thing he had learned on Antar, it was that he was human, almost completely. He could only take so much.

Touching he could not take.

He tried to appear casual as he pulled away, walked toward the darkness on the edge of the light thrown by the headlights. He recited it stonily, as though it had happened to strangers, not to himself and his nearest and dearest. "They all died. Vilandra let Khivar into the Palace with his army, thinking that he only meant to force Zan to let them marry, not knowing that he had the authority of the Council of Planets to usurp the throne. When she realized that her lover intended to kill her brother, she threw herself in front of Zan, took the death blow meant for him. Rath killed himself when he realized the dishonor his brother had brought to their family. And Ava killed Zan for dishonoring her. Zan let her, having been told that Kadi had been killed too. It was Shakespearean in proportion. A literal blood bath." Max shook his head, not clearly remembering all of it, even after memory regression, but he did remember feelings: his horror at what he had brought his sister to with his stubbornness, his grief at the loss of his best friend and closest ally, and his absolute devastation at the thought that his Kadiya had suffered at the hands of Khivar.

Liz�s face was white. She had her hands clenched tightly at her sides. "That still doesn�t explain what happened to Ava."

Max sighed. "The irony of the whole thing was that because it was Ava who had technically killed Zan, they blamed the whole fiasco on her. She was executed for regicide, thus ending the saga of the Royal Four."

"But that wasn�t the end, Max. Someone saved you. They sent you here," Liz prodded.

"Larek�and our mother. " Max shrugged. "Larek was the only one who had not supported the overthrow, mainly out of personal loyalty to Zan. I met him on Antar," Max elaborated. "He is extremely proper and traditional. He knew about Kadi when he cloned us, the Council having told him to get him to support the usurpation, but he sent Ava to Earth, because he didn�t believe it. He still believed that Zan had been madly in love with Ava. Because hadn�t he married her the exact day he had died?" Max whispered this last bit, felt the sadness he had known in that other life when all of his dreams had ended in that marriage.

But he had not been her mate. Not in the true sense. That honor had been solely reserved for Kadiya.

"God Max. It was just horrible." Liz�s arms were around her middle, as though she was cold. He longed more than anything to reach out, pull her into his arms.

"It was," Max acknowledged. "But we got a second chance. And I almost screwed it up royally again this time too. No pun intended," he added when Liz stared at him.

"But you didn�t," Liz replied. "Because you�re here. You�re still alive. And Khivar is dead."

"Yes, Khivar is dead." Max shuddered briefly, couldn�t help it. He knew Liz noticed. "I killed him."

"You�re safe here." Liz nodded resolutely. Max frowned slightly. It was almost as if she was trying to reassure herself of this fact.

"Yes. Is there a reason we might not be?" Max asked, reading something on Liz�s face that made his stomach clench suddenly.

Liz grimaced slightly. "Max, I don�t know whether I should tell you this or not�" She swallowed. "Okay, that�s wrong. I know I should, but I don�t want you to freak out or anything. Plus, I should have told you when I first saw you and now I just feel like a heel about that too."

Max�s feeling of unease increased. "Tell me. I trust your judgment, Liz. If you think I should know, I probably should."

"Ben was almost hit by a car today," Liz blurted. Her expression was horribly guilty. Max barely registered this though. He felt like he had been punched in the solar plexus.

Ben. His son. The one person who would make him pull through, now that he knew for certain that Liz was lost to him for good.

His sole reason for living had almost been hit by a car.

"Get in." Max motioned towards the car. "We have to go home."

"If Khivar is dead, it has to have been an accident," Liz continued, once they were in the Cherokee and back on the highway. "Some drunk or something."

"Probably," Max agreed, still feeling tense. "You�re sure that he was all right?"

"Yeah. A little freaked out, but I don�t think he knew how close it was." Liz was staring out the front windshield, her expression blank. "Max, I am so sorry I didn�t tell you before this. I don�t know what I was thinking. But I was just so angry at you � and I knew he was safe with Michael � and it just slipped my mind." Her voice broke. Max glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. He realized that she was crying.

She was crying over his Ben. And she didn�t even know the truth about him.

She would, but not until after her wedding. It was another secret that he had to keep so as not to disrupt her life. Knowing after wouldn�t change anything after all.

"Liz, it�s okay. You told me now." He wasn�t angry at her. He was more angry at himself�that he had been so irresponsible earlier today by sneaking off to Roswell to get a glimpse of Dan, by forgetting to get Michael to pick Ben up on time. He was a father�by his own choice. He damn well had to start acting like one.

Max reached out, patted Liz�s knee awkwardly. He jerked his hand back when he felt her tense up instantly.

"Tell me about Dan." He said it to get her to stop crying, to take her mind off of her guilt, and also to try and ease his worry about Ben until he could actually see that his son was fine with his own eyes, but the minute the words came out of his mouth he could have kicked himself. What the hell was he thinking? The last thing he wanted to hear about was Dan!

Max knew Liz was staring at him. "You can�t be serious?" she finally managed to say.

"I am." Max gritted his teeth, forcing the words. "I need to know that he deserves you."

Although Max already knew that Dan didn�t. At all.

Liz was quiet for several moments, as though trying to process the fact that he really expected her to talk about her fianc�. "Er, well, we met at Harvard," she started off slowly. "He was the TA in one of the classes I took."

"So, he�s older then." Max narrowed his eyes.

"He�s thirty," Liz replied. "I wasn�t looking to date anyone when I went there. My entire life was focused on school, but we spent a lot of time together, and one thing led to another." "You fell in love with him?" Max knew his nostrils were flaring and that he was clutching the steering wheel far too tightly. Why did he keep asking questions? Was he trying to torture himself?

But he knew the answer to that one. Of course he was. Better to torture himself about Liz than to worry about Ben. Not much better, but better.

"Yes," Liz answered simply. "I could talk to him about anything. I never expected to find that again. Not after what happened with you. Not after how badly it ended," she finished quietly. "He was extremely patient. I mourned you for a long time, Max."

He closed his eyes briefly, pain shooting right to his heart. "I�m sorry about that, Liz," he finally said. "I�m glad you found someone. You deserve to be happy."

He hated Dan, yes. But if he truly made Liz happy, well, Max would try and like him. It would be the absolute hardest thing he ever did, but he would try.

"I didn�t think I ever could be again�not after you left. But I was." There was a long pause, and then, "Max?" Her voice was small, wary.

"Yeah?"

"Can you tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

"How you could have left me�without even saying goodbye?"

Max�s breath caught in his lungs. He had never expected her to ask such a thing, didn�t think that she wanted to revisit the past at all�at least that�s the impression he had gotten, with her constant insistence that nothing in the past mattered anymore. "I don�t know how," he finally admitted.

Because, now, sitting here beside her again, as he had dreamt of doing from the moment he had blasted off in that spaceship, for the life of him, he had no idea how he could have done it.

"That�s not good enough." Liz sounded angry now. "I deserve to know what was going through your mind� How you could have done that. Because you had to have known that I wouldn�t have stopped you. You could have at least told me�told someone! We were so worried about you!"

Max tried to breathe deeply, in an attempt to reacquire some equilibrium. He was actually surprised that he was still managing to drive. He felt like his veins wanted to jump right out of his skin, the blood was rushing through them so quickly. "I think� I think I knew that if I called you, I wouldn�t be able to do it. I wouldn�t be able to go through with leaving. Because I knew that I might not come back, and I couldn�t bear talking to you even once more, because it might be the last time." He heard his voice crack, tried to hide it. He wanted her to know how much he had loved her, how much he still loved her, but he didn�t want her to know that giving her up now was tearing him up inside, despite the fact that he was doing a very good job of hiding it. "I just could not bear to actually have it be the last time. Because I had to go."

There was another long silence as Liz digested this. "Okay. I guess I understand that," she finally said. "And it all worked out for the best anyway. You found Ben. I met Dan. Michael and Isabel are safe."

Max did not reply. Because he couldn�t. Sure, a lot had gone right. He had saved Ben. Michael and Isabel had never had to make the choice about whether to go back with him, had built lives for themselves on Earth.

But one thing had turned out very, very wrong. He had lost her. And the worst part was that he had never in a million years expected that he would. Not after he had learned the truth about Kadiya. Soul mates were supposed to be together. It was why he had been so sure through his entire time on Antar that she would be waiting for him when he returned to Earth. Not only because she was Liz and he was Max.

But because she was Kadi and he was Zan.

Because, in the end, it just wasn�t fair that he had had to lose her twice.

"Are you sure you don�t mind coming?" Max asked quietly. "I just really needed to get back here. I�ll take you back to Izzy�s as soon as I check on Ben."

"Max, it�s okay," Liz replied. "I wouldn�t mind seeing him again myself." She flushed when Max looked surprised. "I wasn�t kidding when I told you that I felt something when I was with him Max. I think I just knew that he was yours. I know he�s okay, but it�ll make me feel better to see him again." She tried to ignore the pleased expression that crossed his face.

They had driven the rest of the way back to Michael and Max�s apartment in virtual silence, each lost in their own thoughts. The quiet had not been tense this time though. Instead, it had been comfortable, familiar.

It had been too comfortable. Comfortable enough that if Liz closed her eyes, she could pretend she was seventeen again, flying down the highway in Max�s old Chevelle, the wind blowing through her long hair. She could almost imagine breathlessly awaiting Max�s touch, because she knew it was coming sooner or later.

When they were seventeen they could barely keep their hands off of each other. It had sometimes seemed like she couldn�t breathe properly until she was in Max�s arms.

It was why she had been willing to forgive him for Tess, had been willing to let him back into her life. She had asked him if he thought she was so pathetic that she would wait for him for her entire life, but being in his company again� It reminded her of why she had been willing to take another chance on him after finding out about the baby and before he had left her.

Nothing was right when they were apart. She remembered his words to her on the rocks near the pod chamber, after Tess had left, taking Max�s son with her�

I�ve been really wrong about a lot. But I was right about one thing: to get you into my life, to be around you, to love you.

He had been right. It was why she had let him back in. Loving each other had never been wrong. It had never been what had screwed up everything. It had been staying away from each other that had caused all the problems. And, so, she had been willing to do anything to make sure that they were never apart again, including helping him find his son.

Because they were meant to be together. Max and Liz. Not Max and Tess. Not Liz and anyone else.

But there had been someone else for him�someone else he had loved enough to give up a throne for.

His story � the one about Zan and Kadiya � it had disturbed her more than she had let him know. To know that he had been so attached to someone else�anyone else� Even in a past life�

It had hurt.

It was ridiculous and insane and silly. She was engaged to someone else�someone she loved. She had long accepted that Max&Liz were not meant to be, and yet she was upset because he had been in love with someone else in a another life.

It was insane but true. She had to admit it to herself.

She was used to Tess, could have accepted the great love story of Zan and Ava. In fact, it probably would have made her feel better about Ben�to have that acknowledgment that there was no way she could have stopped what had happened between Max and Tess, that it had been destined.

It was beginning to dawn on her that the idea that maybe Max and Tess had ended up together on Antar had always been a possibility in the back of her mind. She hadn�t liked it � because of what she had done to Alex and because of what Tess was � but she had accepted that maybe it had been best for Max to leave her when he had � when she still had the chance to make a new life for herself, while they were still young. Maybe he had found his destiny on Antar�with her. Because Liz didn�t doubt for a minute that Tess still wanted Max, even if she had betrayed him to their enemies.

Because who wouldn�t want Max? At least that�s what her eighteen-year-old heart had wondered.

Yes, it would be better if he was with Tess. He would be with his son and maybe he could fix whatever it was that was wrong with Tess.

Tess needed him.

Max and Liz were not meant to be after all. She had accepted it, moved on, found Dan.

Because what would she, Liz, have done if they had stayed together and married and committed to each other for life and he had left her anyway?

And he would have left her. Ben would have been found, one way or another. Wasn�t it better that it had been sooner? And wasn�t it right that Max and Tess had been together so that Ben could exist?

All of this was going through Liz�s mind as she followed Max into the apartment, as she tried to sort out what she was feeling now. Now that he was back.

Because it changed everything again. She didn�t want it to, but if their conversation had told her one thing, if her feelings and her jealousy over Kadiya had told her anything, it was that she was not over him.

But all this seemed inconsequential a split second later when she ran right into Max�s back.

He had stopped abruptly. It was only when Liz peered around him that she saw that the main room of the apartment was in a complete shambles.

It looked like it had been torn apart by a hurricane. Or a wild animal.

Or something not of this Earth.

"Oh my God!" Liz gasped. "Max!"

But Max was already on the move, yelling as he ran into the bedroom. "Ben! Michael, where are you???"

Liz watched him for a moment, frozen. She could hear the panic in Max�s voice as he called out again. "Ben!"

She managed to croak Max�s son�s name. "Ben?" And then, more strongly. "Ben!" She hurried in the direction of the kitchen. "Michael! Are you here?"

Max joined her there a minute later. He was turning in circles, his hands up at his temples, his manner completely frantic. "Oh God. Liz! Where are they?"

She grabbed his arms, pulled them down from where they were running wildly through his short dark hair. "Max! Calm down! You need to calm down!" He was staring at her, his eyes wide with horror.

"Liz! Where is he???"

"Max, this looks really bad. I know it does. But we need to calm down." She could see him struggling to get a hold of himself. "We need to think. Could Michael and Ben have made this mess themselves?"

"Why the hell would they tear the entire apartment apart?" Max demanded, sounding angry.

"They wouldn�t," Liz agreed. She was searching her mind desperately for an answer. None presented itself. For the life of her, it looked like someone � or something � had invaded the apartment and had taken everyone in it away with them. And yet� She frowned slightly, deep in thought. "But maybe whoever did this didn�t find what they were looking for. Because, Max, think about it. Why would they destroy an apartment if they had what they had come for?"

She saw a flash of hope on Max�s face. "You�re right!" He was staring at the wall, his eyes darting around. She could practically hear the wheels turning in his head. "They didn�t find him. Obviously. Michael must have gotten him out in time."

Liz raised an eyebrow. "Who didn�t find him Max?" she asked suspiciously. "I thought you told me that you were perfectly safe here."

Max didn�t reply, just continued to stare at the wall, a slight frown appearing on his face. "Wait a minute�" He turned on his heel, hurried back into one of the bedrooms.

Liz hurried after him. "What? Max! I think we should call Kyle. He can put an APB for Michael and Ben. We should call Isabel. She needs to know about this. She might be in danger. She and Lexi and Jesse. Max!"

But Max didn�t answer. When she entered the bedroom, he was standing in the center of the room, staring at the wall there. She looked around the room, searching for whatever it was that had brought him back in here. She felt her stomach turn over at the disaster that had been wreaked on Ben�s bedroom. Because there could be little doubt that it belonged to Max�s son. There were a few action figures from the final Star Wars movie on the bed, looking incongruous on a mattress that had been ripped to shreds. There was a poster for the Phoenix Coyotes hockey team on the wall and a picture of the Earth from space, very similar to the one that had hung on the wall in Max�s old bedroom in Roswell.

It was a simple room, but it was also clear that Max had done his best to make it a place a little human boy would want to be, even in the short time they had been in Albuquerque.

Liz watched Max in consternation as he moved towards the white wall that had the Coyotes poster on it. He ripped it off the wall, began to run his hands over it.

"Max, what on Earth are you doing?" Liz demanded, seriously concerned about his mental state. Had he completely lost his mind? How had he managed to accomplish anything on Antar if this was how he reacted in an emergency?

But she should have known better. Max was at his best in a crisis, always had been. Flashes of the episode with Pierce and all the various Skin-related disasters passed through her memory. Max had never faltered when lives had been in danger.

At least when he had known about the danger. He had not been able to save Alex. But, then, none of them had known about the snake in their midst.

"Liz, there used to be a closet here," Max told her over his shoulder. "This is a mind-warp."

"A mind-warp?" Liz felt a frisson of fear descend her spine. "Max, is Tess�"

"Tess is dead," Max replied firmly. "It�s Ben. It�s his gift. He inherited it from her." He began to pound on the wall, which for all the world seemed like a solid mass to Liz. "Ben! Are you in there buddy? It�s Dad. Let me in!"

Liz watched him for a moment, still uncertain. But she suddenly remembered the time Tess had mind warped an entire room out of existence in the Crashdown�the time Nicholas had been after them in Roswell, when he had made all the humans in town disappear. It was entirely possible that Max was right. She rushed over to Max, joined him in pounding on the wall. "Ben? Come on out, honey. It�s Liz. I�m here with your dad. You�re safe, sweetie."

Nothing happened.

Liz turned to Max. He rubbed his hand across his face wearily, continued to knock. "Ben, it�s Dad. I swear it is."

"Max, are you sure that you�re right about this?" Liz ventured carefully. "I mean, didn�t Tess have to know who she was mind warping for it to work? Shouldn�t we be able to see the door? Ben wouldn�t know we�re here."

"Yes, I�m sure," Max snapped. She jumped slightly, despite herself. She could tell that he noticed and that he instantly regretted his tone. She didn�t blame him though. He was freaking out with worry after all. "I�m sorry, Liz," he said, his tone calmer. "I had to learn a lot about mind warping when I found out it was Ben�s gift�so that I could help him develop it. Tess didn�t always have to know exactly who she was mind warping," Max explained. "Remember that time when I had to change Pierce�s bones?" Liz nodded. "She only knew a number then�not who, but how many. Which means that there were two or more people here. And he doesn�t know they�re gone and so he�s still mind warping two minds and we just stepped into it."

"I guess that makes sense." Liz shrugged. She gestured at the wall helplessly. "But he obviously doesn�t believe it�s us. What are we going to do?"

"I need to figure out a way for him to know it�s us." Max sighed heavily, ran a hand through his hair. Liz felt a pang when she saw how tired he looked. She realized that his entire being radiated weariness, had since she had first laid eyes on him. She had noticed, she reflected, but had chosen to ignore it because of how angry she was at him.

"Why don�t you try something that only the two of you would know?" Liz suggested, grasping at straws.

Max�s eyes lit up. "Good idea." He turned back towards the wall, brought his hands up and laid them flat against the hard surface. "Ben, it�s me, buddy. I�m going to tell you something�something only you and I know. And then you�ll know that it�s really me and Liz out here. Okay? So just listen and when you know it�s us, you can stop mind warping."

Liz couldn�t help herself. She brought her hand up, laid it on his arm, supporting him. He turned his head, his eyes meeting hers for a split second. Something flared there that made her heart skip a beat, but she refused to stop touching him.

He needed her. It would be the last time that she would be in a position to help him and she was going to do it.

They were friends. If nothing else, they always would be. And friends helped each other.

"Okay. Are you listening, kiddo?" Max began to speak in a soothing voice. "Do you remember what I told you about on the ship when we were coming back here?" He paused, swallowed. "I told you all about all the people you were going to meet when we got here. I told you about Grandma and Grandpa and Auntie Izzy and Michael� And even about Maria and Kyle and the Sheriff." Liz felt tears beginning to fill her eyes. She lowered her head, rested her forehead against Max�s arm. Because she knew what was coming next. She just knew. "And I told you about Liz. I didn�t tell you her name, but I told you that she was my best friend and that she was going to love you. Do you remember I told you that? I told you that when she found out who you were, she was going to love you more than anyone in the world."

Liz frowned slightly. Her heart was beating a million miles a minute. There was something strange in the way he said that. When she found out who you were� Like she didn�t already know who Ben was.

But, he was right. Ben was Max�s son. And she did love him. Just because he was a part of Max.

Max, who until this minute, she had refused to recognize she still loved. In spite of everything, she still loved him.

Max was still speaking. "And she does Ben. Already. She told me."

"It�s true Ben," Liz interjected. "Your dad is right."

"She doesn�t even know yet Ben, but she loves you," Max continued. He had brought one of his arms down from the wall, used it now to pull Liz more closely against his side.

Liz raised her head, stared up at Max. "Know what Max?" she whispered.

But Max just smiled sadly, continued to speak to his son. "Because we�re the only two who know the truth, right Benny? No one else knows, but I told you because you deserved to know who you really are. And because I wanted you to know how special who you are makes you."

Liz lowered her eyes, just listened, knew that whatever Max was about to say was going to change everything.

But somehow she knew it would not be in a bad way. She waited breathlessly.

"I wanted you to know how special you were because you had a father who was good and brave and completely loved by all of his friends. You are so special because you are the gift he left behind when he left us. And so I told you that I wasn�t your real father, even though I am so lucky that I get to be your dad."

And Liz knew. The truth came to her so abruptly, she gasped, stumbled.

She felt Max tighten his arm around her, as though he knew her legs were about to give out on her. Liz�s throat was closing up as tears began to stream down her face.

"I told you something that no one else knows. I told you that a man named Alex Whitman was your real father and that he had died protecting his best friends."

Liz barely saw the mind warp dissolve. She had fallen to her knees, despite Max�s best efforts to hold her upright. He was down beside her, not touching her any longer, because his arms were full of little boy.

Ben.

She felt Maria�s arms coming around her, heard her best friend�s sobs through her own daze of grief.

And yet� Liz knew that grief was not the reason she was crying.

Because her eyes were full of the child in Max�s arms, the child to whom she had felt an instant connection, just like she had felt one to his father all those years ago.

"Hi. I�m Alex Whitman." The ghost of the boy Liz had known stuck his hand in her face. "We met last year, but you forgot about me."

"Oh. Sorry." Liz stared at him. Who was this strange boy? She had wanted to sit beside Maria but Ms. Elmer had a seating plan. Who needed a seating plan in Grade Five anyway? Liz thought in annoyance. But her irritation did not last because he passed her a piece of gum.

"It�s okay." The brown-haired boy replied cheerfully. "We have the whole year to make up for lost time. We�re going to be best friends you know." He grinned at her.

And Liz smiled back.

"Alex." Liz felt a smile break across her face, through her tears.

And, as her eyes met Max�s dark ones over Ben�s head, she knew that she was in serious trouble.

"�barely managed to get into the closet and get the mind-warp up before they were in here. I don�t know how the kid knew they were coming, but he did. He herded me and Maria in there. Max, he saved our lives." Michael shook his head in disbelief.

He was sitting on the couch, Maria beside him, his arm draped loosely around her shoulders. Whatever it had been that had made them so mad at each other apparently suddenly seemed insignificant, because they had not let go of each other since following Ben out of the closet.

Max could see that Michael was still shaking slightly. Maria looked shell-shocked, stared at the floor as Michael explained what had happened. They were both acting like they had forgotten what it was like to have their lives threatened.

Which they had, of course. They had lived for eight years in safety and security and now it had all come tumbling down again. Max felt a pang of guilt. He had done this to them. Coming back had made this happen.

He had truly thought they would be safe on Earth. He had been so sure that all the danger was gone.

Max was sitting in an armchair, Ben still clutched in his arms. His son had fallen asleep almost immediately after running to him, completely exhausted from having had to use his gift for so long.

Liz was standing against the wall, beside the television, staring at Ben, a half-smile on her face. She had not spoken a word since that first tortured, joyous, "Alex." All she did was watch Ben, looking for all the world like she had entered a dream from which she hoped never to wake up.

Max tried not to think about what her reaction was going to be when she got past her first shock and exhilaration and remembered that Max had kept Ben�s true identity from her. It was not going to be pretty. Even the fact that he had tried to tell her in the desert was going to be overshadowed by the fact that he hadn�t tried very hard.

But he had other things to worry about right now.

Like the fact that a maniac was after his son and he had no idea how to stop him because he didn�t know what he wanted.

"I just don�t get it, Maxwell. Why the hell would Nicholas want the kid?" Michael asked, running a shaky hand through his shaggy hair.

Nicholas.

Max had almost completely lost it when Michael had told him that it had been that little troll who had come to the apartment, who had threatened Ben�s life. Max didn�t understand how Nicholas still even existed. He should have died long ago, unable to go on in the Earth�s atmosphere after his skin died. They had destroyed the harvest in Copper Summit all those years ago. There should have been no way for Nicholas to survive.

"I have no idea," Max replied wearily. "He has to know that Khivar is dead, has to know that the war is over on Antar, that he has no place there anymore."

"Revenge?" Michael asked. " Maybe he wants to take your son out because you killed Khivar?" There was a pause and then Michael added, "Which brings up the idea that maybe you should give us a few more details about that Max. How exactly did you take out that bastard anyway?"

Liz finally spoke up, cutting off Michael�s question, much to Max�s relief. "If that�s what it is, the simple answer is to get the word out that Ben isn�t Max�s son." She swallowed, tears appearing in her eyes. "He�s Alex�s," she whispered. "God. Max, how can this be?"

Max rubbed his face wearily with one of his hands, shifting Ben on his shoulder. He saw Liz eyeing Ben longingly, like she wanted to offer to take him off Max�s hands for a while. She was so small though, and Ben was a lanky kid for his age. She wouldn�t be able to handle it.

Besides, Max couldn�t let go of him yet. Not yet.

"It�s not revenge." Max sighed heavily. "Nicholas should want to protect Ben because of who he is."

"Why on Earth would that little jerk want to protect Alex�s son?" Maria asked quietly. She shook her blonde head. "I just can�t believe it. Tess and Alex? It just doesn�t make any sense. Kyle I would buy, but Alex??? He hated that tramp."

Max sighed again. He was beginning to realize that he was not going to be able to keep his Antarian experiences a secret after all. Ben�s life being threatened had changed everything again. He needed his friends� support. When there had been nothing to worry about, he had had the option of being able to protect them from the truth, but that luxury was gone. Ben�s safety, as well as the safety of the whole group meant that they all had to know.

"Listen, these are all valid questions guys." Max stood up slowly, balancing his sleeping son with difficulty. When had he gotten so big? It seemed like only yesterday that Max could swing him up over his head, throwing him onto his shoulders and keeping him up there for hours.

And he wasn�t only growing physically, Max realized. The fact that Ben could maintain a mind warp of the magnitude he had, under the stressful conditions he had been under� It was practically a miracle.

It was also a little scary. Because Max didn�t understand it. He and Michael and Isabel had barely had access to their powers until they were adolescents. But Ben� He was coming into his gift so much more quickly, it worried Max.

"We need to get out of here though," Max continued, pushing away his concerns about Ben�s changes for the moment. "They could come back at any time. And we need to warn Isabel. They might be after Lexi too."

"Are we even sure they were after Ben?" Maria asked, a slight hitch in her voice. "Maybe they wanted Michael? They might not even know you�re back, Max."

"They know," Max told her. "The fact that I left Antar with Ben was all over the galaxy in a few hours." When Maria blinked, Max shrugged. "The interstellar media is pretty fierce. They haven�t managed to track us down here yet, but they will."

"Er, does anyone else think this is strange?" Maria looked at Michael and Liz for support. "Are you telling me that there are tabloids in space?"

Max grinned despite himself. "Not like our tabloids, but they have a pretty sophisticated media interchange between the more advanced civilizations." He paused. "They don�t usually cover Earth though. It�s considered something of a backwater in most other places. It�s why the jackals never managed to track me and Michael and Izzy down here. They thought they knew the Royal Four had been cloned and sent somewhere, but they never knew where exactly. The Skins kept it quiet once they had found us because they fully planned on exterminating us and didn�t want it reported on. Plus, letting the news leak would have let everyone know that we really had been cloned. It had been spun as a legend by Khivar."

"Okay, just stop." Maria held her hands up. "This is too much information. Tabloids are my enemies on Earth and now they�re my enemies on an universal scale?" She glowered. "I may be ill."

"Don�t worry about it," Max replied grimly, his smile fading. "They�re not going to find us. And neither is Nicholas�not again. Ben and I are leaving."

"What? No!" Liz jumped forward, a horrified expression on her face. She looked nonplused at her outburst when she realized what she had done, but she continued anyway, "Max, you can�t just take him away. He�s Alex�s son. Alex�s parents deserve to know him. Maria and I deserve to know him."

These were Liz�s words, but there was something else going on in Liz�s eyes as well. Like it wasn�t just Ben she didn�t want leaving. Max immediately quashed that thought. He was not going to go looking for signs from Liz that were not there. He had told her that he would not pursue her and he wouldn�t.

He realized he was frowning. All of this was reminding him that there had been one main reason he hadn�t wanted to tell Liz the truth about Ben�s origins right away�not after he had heard about Dan. Because the thing he most feared was that Liz would decide that she wanted to be with him, Max, because of Ben. Because she felt she owed it to Alex. Max could not bear that.

"Liz, I know," Max told her quietly. "But we have to protect him. I�ll get lost for a while. And if it seems like things have calmed down, maybe I can come back."

"No," Liz repeated firmly. "Running away is never the answer." Max opened his mouth to argue. "Listen Max, it�s not. We have to deal with this. We have to get rid of Nicholas once and for all. Ben and Lexi will never be safe if we don�t. These kids deserve to grow up happy and without having to be on the run." She paused, then smiled slightly. "Weren�t you the one who once said that taking our lives back was the only answer? When the whole thing went down with Pierce?" She moved forward, reached out and ran her hand down Ben�s blonde curls lovingly. "Max, you were right then. And I�m right now."

Max just stared at her. She didn�t understand what she was getting them into. She had lived through some of the times with Nicholas and the Skins, but she had not seen the worst. She had not been tortured at their hands, had not had her thoughts literally ripped out of her skull. She did not know that, strangely, Nicholas was even more dangerous with Khivar dead, because now he was a loose cannon.

And yet�.

He was lying about coming back someday. If he left with Ben, it would be for good. He would never be able to be sure that Nicholas was really gone. He would never see any of these people again�the people he had struggled for eight long years to get back to.

Ben would never have a family.

But he couldn�t commit to anything. Not yet. Not until they all knew exactly what this might be like. Until they all knew exactly what war was like.

"I�ll think about it Liz," he finally said. "Let�s just go to Isabel and Jesse�s. We can�t make any real decisions until they�re informed about what�s going on."

Max laid Ben gently down on the couch, which had been vacated by Michael and Maria during the intense conversation between Max and Liz. "We need to pack up some stuff, Michael. I don�t think we�ll be able to come back here. It�s unsafe."

Michael nodded his understanding, hurried out of the room. Max followed him, tried not to let his heart skip a beat as Liz sat down on the couch and gently lifted Ben�s head onto her lap. She continued to stroke his hair soothingly, the gesture entirely motherly.

It was a scene Max had often envisioned�Liz as the mother of his child. Even when he�d known the truth, that Ben wasn�t really his, he had still longed for it. Because Ben was his in every way that mattered. And Liz would always be the only one he would ever want in his life.

He was going to be alone now, but, at least, with Liz knowing the truth, one part of the dream would still come true. Ben would have her. Because Max knew without a shadow of a doubt that Liz was not going to let them leave, at least not without her.

How Dan worked into the scenario that Max knew Liz was already creating in her mind, about how she could be to Ben what Alex would have wanted her to be, Max had no idea, but he did know that everything had now changed. Liz knew the truth and she had already made it clear that she had no intention of letting Ben go.

If things had been complicated before, they were now ten times more so. And this wasn�t even bringing in the fact that their lives were all in danger again.

Max sighed heavily as he threw some of Ben�s clothes and toys into a duffel bag. He hadn�t managed to accumulate many possessions for his son during their short time back on the planet, but Max wanted wherever they ended up to be as familiar to Ben as possible. He even took the poster of the Earth from space off the wall and carefully folded it, placing it inside a book so that it wouldn�t get too crumpled.

"Let�s go, Maxwell," Michael called from the living room. "I�m beginning to get a little creepped out here," he continued as Max rejoined the others. "I have a bad feeling they�re going to be back soon."

Michael had already picked the sleeping Ben up. Someone had put his jacket on him as well. Liz and Maria were hovering around them, both looking exhausted and emotionally drained. And there wasn�t going to be any rest for any of them yet. Max had already decided that it wasn�t enough to meet at Isabel and Jesse�s. They were going to have to go somewhere secure, at least for a little while, if even just overnight.

Max had somewhere very definite in mind. Somewhere Nicholas would never find them.

He tried to ignore the fact that it was also somewhere a fianc� would never find them either.

Max threw his bag and Michael�s over his shoulder and followed Liz and Maria out the door.

"This isn�t the way to Isabel�s," Liz commented wearily. She was back in the Cherokee with Max, Ben still sound asleep on the back seat. Liz was actually beginning to get a little worried about the boy. He had not stirred once since he had fallen asleep in Max�s arms right after coming out of the mind warp. Max had reassured her though, just reminding her of how tired he used to get when he used his gift.

"I slept solid for sixteen straight hours after I healed you in the Crashdown," Max had told her.

"I never knew that," Liz had said, interested. "You seemed fine the next day."

"I was okay," Max had replied. "Well enough to come to school." He had quirked a grin. "Plus the adrenaline of fear, knowing that I had to tell you something about what I had done, helped keep me alert." He paused. "But I couldn�t use my gift for almost three days. Basic molecular manipulation, sure, but I just knew I wouldn�t be able to heal. The same thing happened when I healed the kids at the hospital that time, but I even shorted out my everyday powers then. Ben�s young still. Keeping the mind warp up that long totally drained him. I�m amazed he could do it at all."

"He�s a pretty amazing kid, isn�t he?" Liz had smiled softly, glancing over her shoulder at the little boy. Every time she looked at him, she noticed something else that reminded her of Alex�whether it was his lanky body or the shape of his hands or even the way his face reposed in sleep. Liz had had enough sleepovers with Maria and Alex through the years to know both of their sleeping expressions intimately�and Ben looked exactly like Alex when he slept.

"We�re not going to Izzy�s," Max told Liz now. "Michael and Maria are heading over there and they�ll bring them to us."

Liz glanced at him. "Which would be where exactly?" she asked quietly. She tried not to think about the fact that every mile they drove took her a mile further away from her fianc�. Because she was also trying to ignore the fact that, at the moment, she didn�t particularly care, that it was actually somewhat of a relief to not have to feel guilty about being in Max�s presence, because this was about Ben now�about keeping the only part of Alex still with them alive and well.

"Somewhere no one will find us," Max answered grimly, interrupting Liz�s thoughts. He took his eyes off the road for a moment, met hers. When Liz raised an eyebrow at him, he continued. "We�re going to Marathon."

Liz stared at him. "Marathon?" she asked weakly. Max just nodded.

Marathon was in an entirely different state. They weren�t going to get there until morning, if then.

Dan was going to kill her.

And yet, Liz was completely not surprised when she opened her mouth and simply said, "Okay."

That was all. Okay. Because not going to Marathon with Max and Ben was completely out of the question. Because not being with them was completely out of the question.

Because of Ben. Because of who he was.

Not because of Max. Not because of the way he had held his son earlier. Not because he had literally traveled through outer space to retrieve a child that was not even his. Not because Liz knew that one of the reasons Max loved Ben the way he did � completely, even if Ben wasn�t who he was supposed to be � was because he knew it was how Liz would feel about the child.

Not because the way he still looked at her with those eyes of his, in the way that weakened her at the knees, told her that he would do it all again tomorrow. Because of her.

Not because a quest that had started out as a retrieval mission for a child no one had wanted, but one everyone had felt responsible for, had ended up a mission that was destined to bring Max and Liz back together.

She knew it, was still resisting it, but there was no escaping it.

Liz sighed, leaned her head against the cool glass of her window.

The alien abyss was opening beneath her again and was pulling her in so resolutely, resistance was a waste of time.

Hell, if she was completely honest with herself, she didn�t even want to resist. Not anymore.

She was fighting this side of herself, the side that longed to give in, but it was a battle she feared she was going to lose.

Because the enemy held all the weapons. He held her heart, still, after all these years. He held her soul too.

And the real question was whether she could trust him not to use them against her.

Because, the part � the absolute worst part � was that she wanted him to.

"How did you find out?" Liz asked quietly after they had driven close to fifty miles in silence. It was so sudden, it made Max jump slightly. She had not spoken a word since agreeing that she would accompany he and Ben to Marathon. Max had even wondered at one point if she had fallen asleep. Her eyes were closed, it was past one a.m. now after all, and it had been a long, emotionally draining day.

But Max should have known better. She had been thinking, forming questions in that razor sharp mind of hers, formalizing a plan of attack. And now it was time to face the music. He smiled slightly to himself, momentarily remembering another time when she had prepared herself for him in advance.

I need to know the truth Max. I need to know�everything. Or I�ll�I�m just going to go to Valenti and tell him everything I know.

He had known even then that she would never do such a thing. He had trusted her with his secret because he had the utmost faith in her. It was only after the trip to Antar that he actually knew why he had so trusted her, but that did not negate the fact that he had always believed in her above all others, from the first moment he had laid eyes on her when he was eight years old.

And now it was time to trust her again�with the horrible truth of what he had done while he had been away from her.

"How did I find out what?" he asked, although he knew exactly what she wanted to know.

Liz sighed softly. "About Ben? That he�s Alex�s son." Her tone demonstrated that she was trying to mask her impatience.

"I didn�t know right away," Max admitted. "I only found out when Khivar bragged about it." He frowned slightly. "I had finally learned where he was keeping Ben hidden. The democratic rebellion was in full swing by this point. Ben was in extreme danger because he represented the future of the monarchy. If they had gotten their hands on him, they would have killed him, even though everyone thought he was my son."

"But weren�t you leading the rebellion?" Liz returned, logically. Unfortunately, very little of what had happened on Antar involved logic.

"Technically." Max shrugged. "I told you before. I didn�t really care about the planet�s future one way or the other. They knew it and knew that if Khivar could continue to use my son, he would. They wanted him dead. I just wanted my son and I wanted to get things settled well enough that I wouldn�t be needed there anymore, so that I could live my life out here. It annoyed them. They wanted me to stay around after they won, to help with the transition. It was another reason they wanted Ben dead. They thought that if they killed him, I�d have no reason to come back to Earth."

The Antarians had never understood that it was what he had wanted more than anything � to find his son and return to Earth � to return to Liz and his family and friends. They had not understood that he had never felt any attachment to Antar, even after returning there. Leaving Earth had only reinforced to Max that it was his home, at least in this life. Being on Antar made it even clearer. He had longed for Earth, longed for all it represented to him�security, happiness, love. He swallowed, hard, remembering how that longing had sustained him. They had not understood anything about him in the end. Not his devotion to a child mothered by his traitorous bride, nor his love for his adopted planet.

It was why he had had to escape them in the end. Because they would have never let him leave. They needed Zan as the figurehead of the new government. What he had needed had not mattered one iota to any of them. It was this one fact that had helped Max to understand what his previous life had been like, what it must have been like to constantly feel as though others were controlling your destiny, that others were making your life for you.

Zan had needed an escape from the trap into which he had been born. He had found it in the arms of a serving girl named Kadiya. Zan had not been strong enough in the end though. He had let them win.

Max had not allowed it.

"Anyway," Max continued, pushing those memories aside for the moment, "Larek got some information that Ben was being kept in a secure holding of Khivar�s near Antar�s northern pole." He paused. "He got the information from Tess."

Max saw Liz flinch out of the corner of his eye. "Why would she help you?" Liz asked, clearly trying to ignore what even the mention of Tess did to her. Max could see that it still affected her, even after all this time.

Max wasn�t sure if he really wanted to answer her. Because Tess had been one of the least logical of all of the problems he had had to deal with on his home planet. Tess�s motivations were ones that still made little sense to him. And they would still hurt Liz.

But he had promised himself that he would tell her the whole truth if he ever got the chance. "Tess was married to Khivar, but she soon learned that she had absolutely no control over him," Max explained. He paused, searching for the right words. "I guess� she started to fantasize about what� Well, what might have been�"

"If she had never betrayed you," Liz finished for him.

Max grimaced. "Right. I think she decided that if she could give me my son back, I would take her too. I think she thought that she could convince me to take back the throne, to give up the democracy, for Ben�s sake. She knew that he was the way to control me. He always has been. From the very beginning." Max shook his head in disgust. He still did not understand how her mind had worked. Because, even now, he didn�t think Tess had been evil. She had just been completely blind to anything but her own desires. She had even been willing to sacrifice her own son to achieve them.

"All she wanted was to be queen."

"Right." Max nodded. "It was what she was raised by Nasedo to want and she was never able to get past it. I think she did try, when she lived with the Valentis," Max added. "But when I started to have those memories of my past life on Antar, after the hostage-taking at the museum, I guess it suddenly didn�t seem so hopeless anymore. And it was around this time that she found out that she was pregnant anyway and she decided to use that too."

There was a long silence as Liz absorbed this. "Which brings us back to what I really want to know," Liz finally said. "About Alex."

"Right. Alex." Max felt a pang of remorse as he reflected on what poor, innocent Alex had been subjected to, simply because he had been a part of their group�and because of his connection to Isabel. "I guess you�ve figured out that they were together while he was supposedly in Sweden?"

"I don�t know anything, Max," Liz replied. "All I know is that the Alex I knew would never have been with Tess, of all people."

"He didn�t remember it as being Tess," Max told her. "He remembered her as Leanna. It was how Tess got close to him. He knew he had been with her, but he never knew it was really Tess. Just like he never knew that he was translating the book."

"Mind warp," Liz breathed, as the realization hit her. "But how on Earth was she so strong that she was able to mind warp Alex for that long? And if she was pregnant for that long too, shouldn�t she have been showing by the time she left in the granolith?"

"When I connected to the baby, when she first told me that it was dying, I envisioned an almost grown fetus," Max admitted, still feeling a little sheepish at how gullible he had been. If he and Tess had conceived Ben, the baby would have been little more than a tiny grain in her womb. And yet, he still had not questioned it, had simply accepted it. Because why would Tess lie? "She wasn�t working alone either. Nicholas was helping her. He hid her condition from all of us."

"But why was Tess with Alex anyway?" Liz asked, clearly slowly pulling together all the threads of the deception that had resulted in the little boy still fast asleep in the backseat of the car. "I thought she was beginning to accept life in Roswell."

"In the end, she wasn�t in control at all. Khivar was running the whole show. Alex seduced her."

"What?" Liz gasped. She lowered her tone when Ben actually stirred in the backseat. "That�s impossible! Even if he thought she was Leanna� He would never! Not Alex!"

"No," Max agreed. "It wasn�t him. The Leanna ruse wasn�t enough. Just like Larek took over Brody�s body�"

"Oh my God." Max glanced at Liz out of the corner of his eye. She had her hands up at her temples, was rubbing, hard. "Are you telling me that Khivar�"

"Yes. Khivar considers himself to be Ben�s father." He closed his eyes, kept his voice at a flat monotone, as though it could somehow lessen the impact of what he was about to say. "Because he used Alex Whitman to make sure that he was born."

Liz felt literally sick. She hit the button that controlled the window on her side of the car, took deep breaths, trying to control the bile that was rising in her throat at the thought of Alex taken over � possessed � by the evil alien who had killed Max, Isabel and Michael in their past lives through his traitorous actions.

"Liz, are you okay?" She could hear the concern in Max�s voice. His hand was on her shoulder, trying to comfort her. "Do you want me to stop?"

She closed her eyes, continued to breathe deeply. In, out, in, out.

"Liz?"

She swallowed, turned back to face Max. "I�m okay. It�s all right."

"Are you sure?" She could see the guilt on his face. "Maybe I shouldn�t have told you." There was a pause, then he asked tentatively, "Does this change things? About how you feel about Ben, I mean?"

Liz glanced over her shoulder, at the small boy still asleep on the back seat. His chest was rising and falling evenly. He was so innocent, and whatever Khivar might have thought, Ben was Alex�s. Her lost friend was reflected in the child. Alex lived on in Ben.

"No," Liz replied firmly. "I don�t care what happened. It was Alex who fathered him."

She saw Max nod in agreement. "It�s what I think too. The only good thing about Khivar being involved at all was that he protected Ben. In his mind, having Ben on the throne was like having his own heir on the throne. He didn�t care that everyone thought he was mine, that Ben wasn�t even really his. He liked being the only one who knew that what he considered to be his blood would rule Antar, even after he was gone."

Liz shook her head. "He was really sick, wasn�t he? Why did he hate you so much, Max? Or I guess I should say why did he hate Zan so much?"

Max sighed heavily. "For many reasons I think. A lot of it was actually a private struggle, one that very few on the planet really understood. Khivar hated Zan because Zan had everything Khivar had always wanted, and, yet, he was willing to throw it all away by ending the monarchy. He resented that Zan and Rath were so close, that Rath considered Zan to be his brother, even more so than Khivar, who he had always brushed off as a spoiled brat. Because he was. Try and imagine one of those kids whose parents give them everything, but they never think it�s enough. They always want more, want what the other kids have. In the end, it really came down to that. Something as silly and stupid as jealousy."

"So it wasn�t really about Vilandra at all?" Liz hated to admit it, but she found the entire history of Antar fascinating. She knew that she shouldn�t, that they should be trying to figure out what the heck Nicholas wanted with Ben, but she couldn�t help but ask about what had come before.

The weirdest part was that all of it sounded strangely familiar to her�like she had heard it all before. She didn�t understand it, but none of this story was particularly surprising to her. Horrifying and tragic, yes. But surprising, no.

"Khivar wanted Vilandra because he knew that Rath wanted her. He enjoyed making her pine over him, reveled in turning her against Zan. I don�t think it will come as a big shock that Zan, Rath and Vilandra were all very close growing up. It was why she felt so betrayed when Zan refused to allow her to marry Khivar, using tradition and duty as excuses, but then when she found out about Kadi, she lost it. Khivar simply enjoyed creating chaos. And he was very good at it."

"Poor Isabel," Liz whispered. "Are you going to tell her any of this?" She looked at Max�s profile. She could see that his hands were clenching the steering wheel tightly.

For a moment she didn�t think he was going to answer her. He was quiet for that long. And then, "I wasn�t going to," he told her softly. "I wasn�t going to tell them anything about what happened in our past lives or what happened when I was back there getting Ben. I didn�t think they needed to know. They�re human now, Liz. They�ve built lives for themselves here." He sighed again. "They both know Khivar is dead. I thought that would be enough, to make them feel secure." He shook his head. "I just don�t know anymore though." She saw him glance in the rearview mirror at Ben. "Everything�s changed again. They may need to know now, especially if Izzy is going to protect Alexandra."

Liz bit her lip. She could understand why he wouldn�t want to tell them about their past lives, particularly Isabel. She had had a hard enough time dealing with the whole betrayal of Zan issue the first time around, when Congresswoman Whittaker had first told her about it. Isabel seemed to have moved beyond her guilt over that now. Dredging the whole thing up again might be a mistake.

Something else had claimed Liz�s attention though. "Why can�t they know what happened when you were getting Ben?" she asked him. It didn�t make any sense to her. He had been on a mission, one that had recovered an innocent boy from a murderous mother and a psychotic usurper. What shame was there that Max was hiding? He had already made it clear that he felt guilty over something that had happened when he had been on Antar.

"Max, what did you have to do?"

Asking him wasn�t a matter of curiosity this time. She could tell that he needed to tell someone, needed to get it off his chest. And even if they couldn�t be together, they had agreed they were still friends. She could be that person for him. He deserved that much at least.

There was another long silence. She could hear Max�s breathing becoming erratic, as he struggled with what he was about to tell her. "I�ve already told you that I killed Khivar," he finally managed to say.

Liz frowned slightly. "Yes. I�m guessing you had no choice Max. After all he had done to you and your family, he more than deserved it. And you had to make sure that he never came after any of you again."

"Liz, you don�t understand. You can�t understand what it�s like to take a life. Even an evil one," Max continued urgently. Liz felt her eyes widening. Of course she didn�t understand. She had never even thought about it actually. "But I didn�t just kill Khivar. You have no idea how many people I had to kill to get to Ben. How many people I had to send out to die to get to him. And most of those people were just doing their jobs, defending the one they considered to be their leader." Liz heard his voice crack slightly. "I understood so easily why Zan had hated being a king. It�s an awful position Liz, being responsible for all those people, for their lives, being able to throw away their lives so easily."

"Max�" Liz felt her heart going out to him. She understood, finally, where the haunted look that she had seen in his eyes came from. It was hidden well, but Max was being tortured internally for what he had had to do to assure the safety of one child. Because, at his core, Max Evans was a healer. Killing and sending others to their deaths must have gone absolutely against his nature.

She flashed back to the days leading up to when he had left her, when they had been eighteen. The Max who had robbed that convenience store, the Max who had gone to Los Angeles, he had been desperate, driven to do crazy things. In the end, he had had to do even more awful things to save the child he had thought was his son.

He was still speaking though, ignoring her attempt to comfort him. "Liz, I�ve ruined lives. So many of them. It all started with Langley. He hated my guts you know. He betrayed me the minute we got back to Antar because whatever control I had over him disappeared as soon as we landed. He despised me that much. I had taken that much away from him. But he was only the beginning." He paused, amended, "Well, it started before that actually. I hurt the people I loved the most: you, Isabel, my parents, and then I went off to another planet and hurt people I didn�t even know."

"Max, you didn�t ruin my life," Liz exclaimed, desperate to get him to stop. "You saved my life. You hurt me, yes, but I have a life because of you." He frowned slightly, took his eyes off the road to glance at her. "And don�t you think talking to Michael about this might help you? He�s experienced it before too. Killing someone I mean."

Max shook his head. "It�s different Liz. He was saving Valenti�s life. I deliberately sent people to their deaths, ordered their deaths. All because I was the king and I could."

"Max, that�s what leaders do! It�s what they have to do!"

"I know," Max replied simply. "But it�s not easy. And Michael and Isabel don�t need to know about any of it. They aren�t leaders in this life and they don�t need to know what they did before, when they were. It changes you, knowing what you can do when you�re in charge. Knowing sometimes that you have to do it, even if you�re a good leader."

Liz just stared at him. She had no idea what to say to him. She almost thought that he didn�t want her to say anything. The burden that he carried on his shoulders was not a light one, but she had the idea that he had no intention of ever letting go of it. It was like the one thing he could do to make up for all that he felt he had done to so many others, was to never let himself forget it.

"What are you thinking?" Max asked after another long silence. His voice sounded tentative, a little unsure, as though he thought that after she had had time to absorb all this, she would start to be disgusted by him, in the same way she just knew that he was disgusted by himself.

She couldn�t help it. She reached out and placed her hand on his knee, squeezed gently. "I�m thinking that you�ve changed Max. A lot. You�ve become the leader you were supposed to be, before Tess interfered that is."

Max snorted, but she could see the slight smile that appeared on his face. She felt a flash of pure pleasure that she had made him feel even slightly better.

But, what he did next, so surprised her, she didn�t know what to think. He took one hand off the steering wheel, picked up her hand and gently placed it back in her own lap.

Liz blinked, felt a momentary stab of embarrassment and pain. She had no time to reflect on what that could have possibly meant though, because she jumped about two feet when a piercing ringing suddenly filled the interior of the Jeep.

It took her a moment to realize it was her cell phone.

She could see that Max was frowning slightly now, but he didn�t say anything as she hurriedly opened her purse and pulled out the small communication device. "Hello?"

"Elizabeth! Where are you? I�m worried sick!"

Liz grimaced, brought a hand up to her temple. She suddenly had a splitting headache.

It was Dan and he sounded extremely irritated. And he was still talking. "I went back to Jesse and Isabel�s after a couple of hours, to make sure that you were all right after your conversation with Max, and found Maria and that annoying boyfriend of hers there. They were all running around frantically and refused to tell me anything about where you are! And then they just left! Has he kidnapped you or something?" Now the underlying note of panic in his voice was becoming more and more clear to Liz.

"Dan, of course Max hasn�t kidnapped me!" Liz exclaimed. She frowned when she saw a smirk appear on Max�s face out of the corner of her eye, turned towards the window, attempting to ignore the fact that he was listening to everything she was saying.

She wondered if she imagined hearing him mutter, "Not yet anyway." She whipped her head around to stare at him, but he was gazing innocently out the front windshield.

"Do you want to stop for something to eat?" Max asked suddenly, far louder than necessary. She couldn�t believe her eyes when he actually had the gall to turn his head and grin at her.

"Are you still with him?" Dan demanded in her ear. "It�s three o�clock in the morning!"

Liz scowled at Max. "Yes, I�m still with him." She had no idea what to say after that. She couldn�t tell Dan where they were going, nor that they weren�t going to be back at Isabel�s anytime in the near future. "His son is sick. I�m helping him." She closed her eyes, grimaced again, waiting for the reaction to that.

"Oh. I see. Well, I can understand why everyone was so upset then, I guess," Dan answered grudgingly. "But why wouldn�t they tell me that?"

"I don�t know," Liz replied, deciding that playing dumb was better than trying to come up with an excuse. "I�ll talk to Maria about it."

"I don�t think Maria likes me very much." Dan sighed heavily.

"Honey, she loves you! They all do. They were just worried," Liz told him helplessly. She so did not have time for this right now.

"Well, are you at a hospital?" Dan asked hopefully. "Can I come help too?"

He was so sweet. Liz knew that he was beginning to get freaked out about how strange she had been acting over the past couple of days, and still he wanted to help. Liz felt a stab of guilt as she piled another lie on top of the ones that had come before. "Thanks so much, honey. I�m sure Max would really appreciate that so much�" She ignored the snort that came from the seat next to her. "But it would just be too many people. It�s best to have the people Ben knows around him. Do you understand?"

"Of course. How long do you think you�ll be?"

"Oh, a couple of days�"

"A couple of days!?" Dan yelled. "Where is this hospital anyway? Outer space? Is the kid dying?"

Liz flinched, held the phone away from her ear. Those last two questions had been a little too close to the mark for comfort. She almost started to laugh hysterically. "Dan, calm down. Please. You promised that you would trust me."

"Elizabeth, I think that you�re asking me to be a little too trusting here," Dan retorted. "We�re getting married in four days. We have planning to do! I�m sorry the kid is sick, but can�t Max�s family deal with it?"

"Well�"

"Tell me where you are. I�m coming to get you!" Dan insisted. "This is craziness. Is he brainwashing you or something? Your dad was so right."

Liz frowned. "What did my dad say to you?"

"He told me that I could trust you but that I couldn�t trust Max Evans," Dan snapped back. "Just a few minutes ago as a matter of fact."

"Are you kidding me? My dad said that? It�s been eight years for God�s sake. You�d think he would have gotten over some of this by now!"

She looked at Max, who was now frowning again.

"Well, apparently he was right!" Dan retorted. "I just know that guy is up to something," she heard him mutter.

"Dan, do you or do you not trust me?" Liz demanded, getting angry despite herself. None of this was Dan�s fault, and yet she was furious at him. More than likely because he had every right not to trust her. He shouldn�t trust her. She was flat-out lying to him.

But she had no choice. She could not leave Ben�not when his life was in danger.

There was a long pause. "Yes." It sounded like he was forcing himself to say it.

Liz sighed. "I am really sorry about this. I swear I�ll explain everything when I see you."

"In two days?" he asked, sounding annoyed.

"In two days," she repeated. Or three, she added mentally to herself. She refused to think about what it would mean if she wasn�t sure that Ben was safe after three days. "I�ll call you in a few hours. Try and get some sleep. I swear to you that everything is fine."

There was another long pause. "Elizabeth, please remember that I love you."

"I know you do. I do too," Liz replied. She didn�t question why she couldn�t say the words themselves. She knew it was because Max was sitting right beside her, listening, not even trying to pretend that he wasn�t.

She just could not tell Dan that she loved him in front of Max.

It was a bad sign. She knew it was.

"Bye," she whispered, clicking off.

Liz swallowed, felt tears pricking her eyes. She blinked rapidly, refused to let them fall.

Max did not say anything. Neither did she. The tension in the air could be cut with a knife.

Had she really only found out that he was back on the planet twelve hours ago? If felt like twelve years. She was suddenly, inexplicably exhausted.

"How much further?" she finally asked, when she couldn�t take the uncomfortable silence any longer.

"Only a couple more hours," Max replied. And then, "Liz, you should go back. Once Michael and Isabel arrive, I want you to take Maria and I want you to go back to Roswell."

Liz turned her head, stared at him. She could tell by the look on his face that he meant it.

"Max, no." She shook her head. "I�m not leaving him."

I�m not leaving you.

The thought ran unbidden through her mind. She suppressed it ruthlessly. This was not about Max and her unresolved feelings for him.

This was entirely about Ben now.

"Liz, this is screwing up your life," Max told her gently. "It�s not fair. I promise you that I will keep Ben safe."

"By taking him away," Liz snapped, not really angry, but not able to help her tone.

Max just sighed, didn�t reply.

"No," she repeated. And she meant it. "I don�t want to discuss it anymore," she added. "You�re not going to get rid of me, so just drop it."

There was another long stretch of silence, and then Liz said, "Do you think that Alex knew that he was a father? That he knew what happened?"

She felt Max turn his head, felt his eyes on her questioningly. She ignored the fact that she had so completely changed the subject. "I don�t know," Max finally replied. "Do you?"

"He knew he was being mind warped," Liz answered. "He came out of it right before Tess killed him. Kyle told us that," she added. "I wonder how much of what really happened, he remembered?"

"Do you think it would have been better if he had known?" Max asked.

"I don�t know." Liz felt extremely weary again. She leaned her head against the cool window, closed her eyes. "He didn�t love Tess."

"A lot of kids are wanted, even if they aren�t conceived in love," Max commented.

Liz opened her eyes, stared straight ahead. "You always loved him. Even though you didn�t love Tess." She paused. "It must have hurt to find out he wasn�t yours."

"It did at first." Max shrugged. "I felt like I had sacrificed so much for nothing. But then I met him. And I loved him for him."

"And because he was Alex�s."

"Right. And he is mine in every way that counts."

"Would you ever give him up?" Liz asked cautiously. She couldn�t believe she was doing this. But it was a question she had to know the answer to. She wasn�t sure why, but she needed to know. She wondered if a small part of her didn�t hope that he said yes, so that she could take Ben and she and Dan could raise him together.

Because that would be safe. She wouldn�t have to face Max Evans for the rest of her life. Because if she intended to play an important role in Ben�s life, and if Max was his father, she was going to have to.

Max seemed to understand though. He didn�t sound angry when he said quietly, "Never." There was another long silence and then Max added, "Liz, you don�t have to be with me to be a part of his life. I swear I will never keep him away from you."

Liz didn�t answer, just closed her eyes again.

Because that wasn�t what was scaring her. She knew that Max would never keep her away from Ben.

What frightened her was that she was beginning to think that someone was going to have to keep her away from Max.

Because with every mile they drove, she felt the distance between them disappearing, felt the desire to be with him returning more strongly.

He had been gone for eight years and in twelve hours he was undoing all the pain and heartbreak and sorrow he had caused when he had left. How was it even possible? And she didn�t even think that he was trying. That was the worst part.

"Max?"

"Yeah?"

She couldn�t believe what she was about to ask him. She didn�t even know if he would be honest with her now, because she had made it more than clear to him that she was uninterested in any sort of future with him.

"Did you really think that I would be waiting for you when you got back?"

She heard him swallow. Finally, he whispered, "Yes."

Liz didn�t say anything else.

Because she wasn�t allowed to say what she wanted to say.

Twelve hours ago she would have been angry at him for admitting it.

Now, all she wanted to say was: I wish I had been.

The sky was beginning to brighten as Max pulled the Cherokee to a stop. He glanced at Liz, who had fallen asleep in the passenger seat an hour or so before. He knew that she had resisted it for as long as possible, clearly still not entirely comfortable letting go that much in his company, but her fatigue had finally taken over. It had been a long, emotional day for both of them. She had needed an escape and sleep had provided it�at least for the time being.

He smiled slightly to himself, took a moment just to enjoy looking at her. She was still so incredibly beautiful to him, it almost took his breath away. Her dark hair brushed the side of her neck, framing the soft skin of her face, slightly flushed in sleep, making his fingers ache to reach out and touch her. To him, she did not look a day older. Her being still called to him, sang to his soul in a way he could not ever get tired of.

Her perfection in his eyes was almost maddening because it was inescapable and now, again, unattainable.

It still felt weird to actually have her right in front of him. He had dreamt of it for so long, it almost felt unreal, as though he was soon going to wake up, going to have to return to the loneliness, the solitude of the past few years.

Just being with her filled the empty places in his heart, places he had known would not be complete again until he was with her. That there seemed to be no hope for their relationship in the future did not change this fact. It was the same as it had always been, even in the days before she had known the truth about him, before he had healed her, when he had sat in a booth at the Crashdown, content just to be in the same room as his dream girl. His soul ached to be with hers, if even only so simply.

He had never understood the obsession he had always harbored for Liz Parker, had always simply embraced it, had accepted it as a part of his make-up that made little sense and had less hope, perhaps merely an aching need to feel human, if only in that small way. When he had actually had the chance to be with her, it had turned out to be even more intense, more fulfilling, more right than he had ever even imagined in his wildest dreams.

And he had been the one to throw it all away. It was irretrievably lost, but it did not mean that he could not remember what it had been like, did not secretly hope that it could be regained. He knew it was unfair to her, knew that he had been wrong to tease her about Dan when her fianc� had called, but he had been unable to stop himself.

Because, even if they were never together again, he knew that they were supposed to be, and it made him unable to control himself sometimes. It was almost more than he could bear to know that Kadiya had made the ultimate sacrifice so that they could be together eventually, and now, it had gone all wrong again.

He was doing his best to keep his promise, the promise he had made to her that he would not interfere in her life, but it was a battle he was losing. All he wanted to do was kiss her and demand that she admit that they belonged together, that Dan had simply been a distraction, a place-holder for he, Max. He was actually longing for Michael to arrive with the others, so that a buffer zone could be established, so that he did not have to hold himself quite so rigidly, quite so distantly any more.

It was a relief to get out of the car. Max took several deep breaths, stretched his arms over his head and then rubbed his neck. He was exhausted, not only from the long car ride, but from the tumult of emotion that had been his constant companion since he had first heard that Liz was getting married to someone else.

The confined space had become almost too much, especially during some of the more intense moments of their conversation over the course of the night. It had taken all of his willpower to move her hand away from him when she had touched him at one point. He had wanted to bring her palm to his lips, had wanted to make love to that small hand, until she understood how much merely being in her presence meant to him, affected him.

He had known it had simply been her way of comforting him though, had not wanted to make her uncomfortable. Instead, he had spent the rest of the long ride to Marathon in a state of heightened arousal, beyond what he had become used to in her company. The spot where she had touched him still burned now, as though in a promise unfulfilled.

Max shook his head sharply, forced himself to focus on the problem at hand. Pining over Liz was a waste of time and it was also selfish, considering his son�s life was presently still in acute danger.

He was standing in front of William Atherton�s dome-shaped house, a place he had never expected to see again. Max wasn�t sure why he had thought of it when a place to hide had become necessary, but there was no question that it was secluded, as well as deserted, standing as it did in the middle of the desert, not another house around for miles.

And the memories associated with it had been poignant and tempting. He admitted to himself that he had liked the idea of driving 285 South with Liz again, had secretly harbored a hope that the return to a place where they had shared one of their first adventures might inspire her to re-embrace the magical feeling of being together at any cost, through any problem. It was immature and stupid, but it was true.

Now, looking at the dump that stood in front of him, Max grimaced to himself and shook his head in annoyance. Making this place livable, if even for twenty-four hours, was going to take a lot of energy�energy he didn�t particularly have at the moment. He glanced back longingly at the Jeep, wondered if he could justify driving to a nearby motel, if even for a few hours of shut eye before the others arrived and they decided on a plan of action. He could see Ben still sprawled on the back seat, sound asleep. Liz had not stirred either, even when the car had stopped.

Max sighed again, moved towards the door. He didn�t have the luxury of taking chances. He needed to be where he had told Michael he would be. It was what a leader did and he knew that better than anyone. Changing the plan half-way through was the way to get people killed. They had agreed that they would refrain from cell-phone calls for as long as possible after all, Max more than aware of the Skins technological capabilities after fighting them for so long on Antar. Patching themselves into communication frequencies was one of the easiest ways to get information.

As far as Nicholas knew right now, they were lost, which is what they needed to stay.

He pushed open the door after snapping the lock back with his powers.

The main dome area was still as bare as it had been over ten years ago. He made his way through to the living quarters at the back, found the bedroom easily. They had not been in it during their raid the first time and it looked like no one else had been since then either. The dust hung heavily in the air, made Max want to sneeze. It would not do.

He ran his hand lightly over the surface of the double bed, using his powers to clean the sheets and the mattress beneath. Liz and Ben could share it. He would bring in the sleeping bag he kept in the back of the Jeep to use for himself.

He had barely finished when the creak of the main door and movement in the outer room made him whip his head around.

"Dad?"

It was Ben, sounding half-asleep. "I�m in here kiddo," Max called out, standing up and going out to meet his son.

Ben stood in the middle of the dome, looking up, an awe-struck expression on his face. "What is this place? It looks just like Antar, Dad!"

"Yeah. The guy who used to live here had a mild obsession with our culture," Max told him wryly.

"It�s kind of weird," Ben assessed, turning around and staring at all the corners. He grimaced. "I don�t like it."

"We won�t be here for long," Max replied. "I promise." He moved forward, reached out to ruffle Ben�s blond hair. "How�re you feeling? You used up a lot of energy last night."

"Tired," Ben admitted. "But I did it Dad! I saved Michael and Maria! I was really scared, but I still did it!"

Max felt his heart enter his throat. "I know you were, buddy. I�m really proud of you." He pulled Ben against him, hugging him tightly.

"Is he going to come back? That guy?" Ben asked, his voice trembling slightly.

"He won�t get anywhere near you again. I promise," Max said, meaning it.

"Good," Ben replied. "He was really creepy and scary. I could feel him coming from a really long way off. He just felt� bad." He frowned slightly, shaking his curly, blond head thoughtfully. And with that, he let it go. He wandered off to investigate their surroundings.

Max closed his eyes briefly, knew that his son was willing to forget about the incident because he trusted Max to keep him safe. He had no idea how much danger he was still in, that they still had no idea what the hell Nicholas wanted with the child. Max had already let him down once, by letting Nicholas near him. It was not going to happen again.

"Benno, I�m going to get your stuff out of the car and then you�re going to go back to bed for a while," Max called out to him. Ben had disappeared into the back living quarters, still looking around.

"Awww, Dad. It�s morning!" He poked his head out from the doorway that led to Atherton�s office. "Hey! I have to go to school! I promised Ray and Hunter that I would bring the hockey cards Michael gave me to show them."

Max grimaced. "No school for a few days." He sighed. "For you or Mrs. Ramirez."

Ben stared at him. "What do you mean?"

"Michael played a little trick on us," Max told him wryly. "It turns out that your teacher is your Aunt Isabel, Ben."

"Weird." Ben shrugged. "And you know Liz, too." He looked towards the door leading outside. "I really like Liz, Dad. I�m glad she�s the one you told me about. Is that why she�s here?" he asked. "Because you were right? She loves me already?"

Max smiled sadly. "That�s why she�s here kiddo." Max felt a stab of guilt when the thought passed through his mind that he wished it wasn�t the only reason. Jealousy of his own child was not a good thing. Not a good thing at all.

He needed help. Serious help.

"Cool." Ben moved towards the door. "Do you want me to wake her up?"

"I guess you�d better." He immediately thrust several ideas of how he would like to wake up Liz from his thoughts, sighing again as he turned and went back to the bedroom to continue his cleaning.

"You came back." She stared at him, her heart in her throat. She had thought that she would never see him again, that their last night together had been something she was going to have to hold on to for the rest of her lonely existence. And, yet, here he stood, staring at her, his eyes shining with despair.

So it was done then. The look on his face told her everything she needed to know.

"I had to see you," he said, his voice husky with emotion.

"You didn�t even say good-bye," she told him quietly, inanely. How it could be important now, she didn�t know, but it was.

"I couldn�t. I would never have found the strength to go if I had." He swallowed. She could see that he was trying not to reach out for her, knew that he was aching to haul her against him, just as she was trying desperately to control the urge to throw herself into his arms.

But he was not hers. Not any longer.

"It�s too late," she whispered.

"I know." His face was telling her that, in his mind, it was not though. All she had to do was bend, if even a little, and they could still be together.

"It has to be my love. There was no other way." She repeated the words she had told him many times before, since the very first day. And, yet, she had given in every time.

This time she could not. She had to be strong.

"There is," he replied, shaking his head. "I know it. I am the king."

She smiled sadly. "But you would not be the king any longer. You would have to give up your throne and I cannot allow you to do it."

"It means nothing without you," he replied, turning away. "My life means nothing."

She moved up behind him, knowing it was a mistake, but unable to see him in such pain. She reached out a tentative hand, touched him on the shoulder. "Antar and your family must come first. I cannot ask you to throw them all away for me. It is not right."

He turned on her then, his expression one of tortured rage. But she knew that it was not truly directed at her but, rather, at the destiny he could not control, no matter how much he tried to. "It is not right that I should be trapped in a life I don�t want! This planet is decaying from the inside out and the monarchy is at the root of it. It is wrong that the fate of an entire system rests in the power of one man. I don�t want to be that man, and yet, I am, because of a twist of fate I did not ask for. All I want is you!" With that, he groaned in agony, pulled her against him, burying his face against her neck.

She knew that she should pull away, knew that it was wrong, that he was newly married, that he belonged to her mistress now, but she could not turn him away. Not when he was in such pain.

"Please Kadi. Please!" She felt his lips on her hair, on her cheek, on her eyelids. She felt her heart thundering in her chest as they finally came to rest where they belonged�on her own. "Please," he whispered between kisses. "I will leave her. I will announce it to the galaxy tonight. I will give it all up. All you must do is allow it." Her knees were giving out on her, his gentle assault on her senses too much. She felt him sweep her up in his arms as she stumbled. But she was too lost in him to stop him. She opened her mouth to him, pulled him closer.

He was hers. Zan. She could not turn him away. "Yes. Very well," she sobbed. "I cannot be strong any longer." And with that she allowed herself to let go.

"You are the strongest person I know," he whispered against her hair, much later, as she lay spent in his arms. "It is your strength that allows me to do what, I know in my heart, is right. We are meant to be together and I am meant to lead my planet to a new era of freedom. And it will start tonight."

"Yes. Yes! I know it will be," she murmured, drifting off, her head cradled against his chest, her hand locked in his. Her last conscious thought was of his kiss on her palm.

Until she felt someone shaking her. "Wake up! It�s time to wake up� Liz!"

And then, "Dad! I can�t get Liz to wake up! I think you�re going to have to carry her!"

Liz recognized the voice, felt as though she was swimming up through thick soup, as her eyes fluttered open. It seemed to take an inordinate amount of time to get her bearings as the world came into focus.

She blinked at Max, who was presently staring down at her, an amused expression on his face. "Did you have a nice nap?" he asked teasingly. She could see Ben trying to see around his father�s body, jumping around with far too much energy for the early hour. It was making her tired just looking at him.

Max pushed Ben gently away as he moved back to allow her to climb out of the car.

"Is she awake? I thought she might be dead." The boy was staring at her. Liz felt herself blushing. How long had they been trying to wake her up anyway? "Do you always sleep like that?" he asked, sounding suspicious. "You were talking in your sleep. Dad says we�re going to have to share the bed, but I don�t know if this is going to work."

Liz glanced at Max, who simply raised an eyebrow at her. She blushed for some reason she did not understand. "No," she replied nervously, running her hands through her hair. "I think I was having a weird dream," she told Ben, who suddenly looked interested.

"Really? What was it about?" he asked, taking her hand and pulling her towards the house.

Liz threw her head back, stared up at the dome, memories of the last time she had been there instantly filling her mind, making her shiver to herself. It was funny how truly frightening experiences could take on an almost unreal feeling over the years. But she still remembered her terror for Max and Isabel and Michael when they had realized that someone had followed them to Marathon.

She had never feared for herself here. Because what would anyone want with a small-town girl from Roswell? For her, it had always been about protecting Max and the others. And now it was about protecting Ben.

"I�m not sure," she told the boy now. "But it was very strange. I think your dad was in it," she added, without thinking.

Now where the heck had that come from? Liz frowned, annoyed at herself. But she knew it was true. Max had been in the dream. In what context, she didn�t have any idea, but the way her face was warming up at the moment, she was beginning to guess.

She glanced back at Max, who was following closely, obviously eavesdropping. His startled look was already transforming itself into a self-satisfied smile that made her want to punch him.

"It must have been a nightmare," she told Ben quickly. He laughed, clearly thinking she was teasing him.

But Max continued to smirk, moving past her on his way into the house, his hand accidentally brushing against her arm, sending a shiver down her spine. He grinned at her again as he picked Ben up and threw him over his shoulder, turning his back on her completely.

She stared after him as he carried the child through a doorway across the room. She was more confused than ever. Was he not the one who had not wanted her touching him, only a few short hours ago?

And then she understood. It came to her so suddenly, it took a moment for her to move past her astonishment and into full on rage.

But it did not take long.

It was all part of some devious plot he had cooked up. He was trying to drive her crazy by pretending that he wasn�t interested in her, in hopes that it would make her fall right into his arms. And it was working! Had she or had she not just had an incredibly, embarrassingly detailed dream about him making love to her? Because it was all coming back to her now in excruciating detail. She could still feel his hands on her body, touching her in ways he had never touched her, not even in their most intimate moments as teenagers.

Liz pursed her lips, crossed her arms and forced the thoughts out of her mind. A dream was simply a dream, nothing more. She was not going to let him get to her. She had to be stronger willed than this. She loved Dan.

And there was no way on God�s green Earth she was sharing a bedroom with him. He had to be crazy if he thought so. He could just bloody well sleep in the car.

Liz stomped over to the door where Max and Ben had disappeared, ready to toss Max out on his ear if need be.

When she entered, she was surprised to find a fairly clean and comfortable looking bedroom, where Max was already pulling the blankets up around his son.

"I still don�t get why I have to go back to sleep," Ben was muttering. "It�s light out and I�m not tired at all." Liz felt her anger draining out of her almost immediately. She couldn�t help but smile because this last bit was said through an almost side-splitting yawn.

"Just for a little while," Max replied, glancing up at Liz briefly and then back at his son. "You can get up when Michael and Auntie Izzy get here. You�re going to have to help look after Lexi after all. You need your sleep."

"Who�s Lexi?" Ben asked through another yawn. "I don�t like girls."

"She�s not just a girl," Max told him, sounding amused again. "She�s your cousin and she�s really only a baby."

"Well, that�s okay I guess," Ben grumbled, closing his eyes. But when Max moved to stand up, Ben�s hand snapped out and grabbed his arm. "Dad, don�t go."

"I�m going to be right here, kiddo," Max replied softly, disentangling himself. "Just over there on the floor."

Ben�s eyes were open again. "Why can�t we all sleep together?" he demanded. "It�s a really big bed, Dad." Liz could tell that he was trying to keep his voice steady. She could hear the tremor though. She felt her heart go out to him. He had had a major scare the night before, probably still had no idea why either. He needed to feel as secure as possible right now. He was looking at her now, his eyes bright. "It�s okay, right Liz?"

She glanced at Max, who looked upset. She could tell that he was trying not to look at her, trying not to pressure her to agree to this. Her heart was beating wildly, for no reason that made any sense. "You take the bed, Max," she said. "I�ll sleep on the floor."

Ben frowned. "That�s dumb," he argued, with the logic of which only children were capable. "This is the biggest bed I�ve ever seen!" he exclaimed. "I bet we could fit fifty people in it."

"Well, maybe not that many," Liz laughed. She just shook her head. She could deal with this. They were just going to sleep after all, Ben was going to be between them, and Max was embarrassed enough now to not even want to look at her. He was staring at the wall, an unreadable expression on his face. "It�s okay," she decided. "It�s only a nap anyway." Max�s head whipped around. He stared at her, apparently shocked that she had agreed to it.

So maybe he didn�t have a plan after all.

"Right," Ben declared. "We need our sleep, Dad. You said so yourself."

Max sighed heavily. "Fine." But Ben was already closing his eyes and drifting off. "Liz, you don�t have to do this," Max whispered after staring down at this son for a moment. "He won�t even notice the difference. He�s already asleep."

Liz shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. "I think he will, Max. And he needs to feel safe right now."

Max ran a hand through his hair. "Well, okay. If you�re sure." He turned his back, sat down on the bed again and started to unlace his shoes. Liz watched him for a full minute before she jumped, realized what she was doing and gently sat down on the other side to do the same.

She settled back carefully against the pillow, closing her eyes. She felt the bed shift slightly as Max did the same on the other side. A feeling of peace so unexpectedly settled over her, her eyes snapped open again.

For one split second, the entire world had shifted, had felt supremely right in a way that she could not explain. In a way she had never thought to experience again. In a way she realized she had not experienced in a very long time.

She jumped slightly when the silence that had descended over the room was broken by Max, who whispered, "Liz?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you." It was simply stated but it made her heart beat a mile a minute.

She swallowed. "You�re welcome," she whispered back, turning onto her other side so that she met his eyes over Ben, who was already sound asleep and snoring slightly.

His dark eyes were bright with a longing so intense, she felt her heart turn over in her chest. "Have a good sleep," she said lightly, trying to break the moment.

He broke eye contact with her, turned over onto his back, throwing his arm over his face. "Sweet dreams," he replied quietly. She felt her heart beating a mile a minute again, just looking at him.

Liz turned over again, knowing, without a shadow of a doubt, that she was going to dream of him.

"Dad? Dad, are you awake?"

The first thing of which he became aware as he drifted back to consciousness was that his entire body felt like it was on fire.

The second was that there was a small hand pushing against his back impatiently. But, for some reason, the absolute last thing he wanted to do at the present time was open his eyes.

He realized why a moment later.

He was rapidly becoming aware of a soft pressure against his neck, where the heat seemed to be centered, although he was becoming increasingly aware that it was ranged all the way down his right side.

His entire body tensed immediately.

He was not going to open his eyes. If he opened his eyes the dream would end and Liz Parker would no longer be curled up against him, her lips somehow, miraculously, pressed against his neck.

"Dad?" The whine came again, more insistent this time. "Dad, I�m hungry."

Max groaned, tried to ignore the fact that his son was still tapping him on the back in a steady rhythm.

Apparently Ben was no longer in the middle of the bed. He was no longer creating a physical barrier between Max and Liz and apparently his disappearance had been all it had taken for them to somehow end up in each other�s arms.

His right arm was completely numb, entirely due to the fact that Liz was lying on top of it. He felt goose-bumps rising along his neck. It felt like her arm, where it was flung across his chest, was scalding him right through his shirt.

Clothes. Was he actually wearing clothes? How could she be making him feel this way when they were both fully dressed?

"Dad!"

Max grimaced, let his eyes snap open. "Okay Ben! Be quiet! You�re going to wake Liz."

He could not move. If he moved, she was going to wake up and she was going to realize what had happened and she was going to flip out.

There were other reasons that he didn�t want to move, but he chose to ignore those at the moment.

Waking her�it was unacceptable. Especially considering the fact that she looked so peaceful.

He had managed to move his head so that he could look down at her. Her dark lashes teased her flushed cheeks, her breathing regular and even.

"I�m whispering!" Ben insisted from behind him. "But Dad, we missed breakfast! And lunch!" His voice was rising in outrage. "My stomach is growling! Growling!"

Max flinched as he felt Liz jump in her sleep, moan slightly. Her eyelashes began to flutter.

Oh hell.

And the next instant he was staring right into her dark eyes.

Damage control. He needed it�fast. He could see her eyes widening as she became aware of exactly where she was.

"Good morning," he said quietly.

"It�s afternoon, Dad," Ben complained from nearby. Max realized that his son was back on the bed and was crawling up towards the head of the bed on Liz�s other side. "I checked my watch. I�ve been awake for a whole hour! I tried to be quiet, but I�m too hungry."

But Max was not listening to his son. He was watching helplessly as panic began to cross Liz�s expressive face.

And the next instant she was gone. He barely managed to control the shiver that ran down his frame at the sudden loss of her warmth. He sat up quickly, staring after her.

His entire body was screaming for her by now, was urging him to grab her by the hand as she threw herself off the bed, telling him to pull her back down beside him and give her a reason to stay.

A reason that preferably involved a lot of touching. And kissing. Kissing would be good.

She stood at the end of the bed for one long, charged moment, her eyes locked with his. And then she turned�and ran.

"Is Liz okay?" Ben asked, apparently forgetting his stomach as Liz went stumbling out of the room. He sounded scared suddenly, as though he thought he might have done something wrong. "Is she mad because I woke you up?"

Max sighed heavily, ran his hands wearily through his hair as he swung his feet over the side of the bed and stood. "I�m sure she�s not mad at you kiddo. Just let me go talk to her for a sec, okay?" He moved towards the door, turning before he got there, remembering something Michael had told him before he left the apartment. "There are some chips and sandwiches in my bag. We�ll get something better later."

"Okay." Ben still sounded unsure, but as Max left the room he could hear him begin to rummage around for the food.

Liz was not in the main dome area, nor was she in the office or the kitchen. He could see that the door leading to the small bathroom was closed and after standing there for a moment, he reached up and knocked softly. "Liz? Liz, are you okay?"

He frowned as he heard running water begin behind the door. He pounded a little harder. "Liz, please open the door."

There was a long pause. He heard the water shut off and then stepped back as she cracked open the door.

"I�m fine, Max. Can I just have a second here?" Her voice sounded distinctly weird though.

"Liz, it was an accident," Max told her quietly. "It didn�t mean anything. You were asleep."

Of course the fact that he was hoping that it had meant something made his voice sound slightly less than convincing.

He heard Liz sigh. She opened the door wide, stood there staring at him. "I love my fianc�," she said.

"I know." He didn�t know what else to say, had no idea what to say to her to make her feel better.

Because after he had betrayed her by sleeping with Tess, nothing she could have said would have ever eased the guilt he had felt. Nothing anyone could have said would have helped.

Nothing would ever erase the way he had felt when he had seen the look on her face when she had understood what had happened between him and Ben�s mother. Or, at least, what he had thought had happened.

He knew that she was presently picturing Dan�s face as he found out about this.

Dan, who had trusted her. Dan, who she was supposed to spend the rest of her life with.

"Max�" She had closed her eyes, was leaning tiredly against the door frame, looking for all the world like she was ready to give up.

But give up what?

"Yeah?"

And then she said something so completely off topic, he blinked.

"Can you even begin to understand how much I missed you when you were gone?" she whispered.

He didn�t know what to say, just stared at her. He wouldn�t have been capable of speech anyway. His heart was presently lodged in his throat.

"I don�t think you can," she continued, as though not really expecting an answer. "Because I, myself, wasn�t aware of how much until three minutes ago." She paused, opened her eyes and looked beyond him, unseeing. "Until I woke up in your arms and felt like I had come home, I had absolutely no idea."

"Liz�"

"No, just listen. Please." Liz cut him off urgently. "I know you�re about to say that you understand, that you missed me too." He swallowed, because that had been exactly what he was about to say. "But you can�t understand, because, tell me if I�m wrong, but didn�t you, in your heart, always know that if you stayed alive long enough, you would see me again?"

He had no idea what she was getting at, but nodded. "I knew."

"Which is why you expected me to wait for you," she added.

Max grimaced. It sounded bad, but it was true. He had expected it, because he knew that he would get back to Earth someday, that he would see her again. And somehow he had expected that she would know it too and that she would wait.

"But Max, the thing is, when you left, without even saying good-bye�" Her voice faltered. He could see tears beginning to form in her brown eyes. "I couldn�t know if you were ever coming back. I didn�t know. And so the way I missed you� It was like you had died. I had to let go. I had to, or I wouldn�t have survived it."

He felt his heart crack. Because he suddenly knew exactly what she was telling him. But he let her say it anyway. She had the right, after everything, to at least say it. "I can�t do it again, Max. I let go of you once. I survived it. And, the thing is, I still love you. But we don�t belong together. I can�t let myself feel everything I know I would feel because I would not live through it a second time."

"I�m not going anywhere, Liz," he told her, despite himself. He had promised her that he wouldn�t coerce her, wouldn�t try and convince her. But he had to. She was Liz. No matter how hard he told himself that he had to let her go, had to let her live her own life, she was Liz and they belonged together.

She smiled sadly. "Logically I know that Max. I understand that you�re here for good. But, I just can�t do it. Not again." Tears were gleaming unshed in her eyes. He could tell that she was only holding them back by the sheer force of her will, which was considerable. Had it not been her who had convinced him all those years ago that they owed it to themselves to try and be happy together, in those wonderful days before Tess had ever showed her face in Roswell? And had it not also been Liz who had willed herself to stay away from him, so that he could pursue his so-called destiny with Tess?

And now she was willing herself not to love him. Not to give in. Not to take another chance that he might somehow cause again the level of pain he was only now beginning to understand that she had experienced when he had left her.

"I�m sorry," she whispered. "I really am."

And with those words � those sad, unbending words � something within him snapped.

Because it wasn�t good enough. It was not a good enough reason.

"You do know that you�re always going to wonder if your life was just a little less extraordinary than it could have been?" he asked, knowing he sounded bitter and defeated, but unable to help himself.

Because, up until this moment, even with all of his protestations to the contrary, despite all of his conviction that he was going to leave her alone, allow her to live her life, inside, in his deepest heart, he had been sure that he was going to win her back. That it would only take some time and some patience and she would realize that they belonged together.

But that wasn�t the problem. She already knew it. She just wasn�t willing to allow it.

And, in that instant, when his fortunes seemed to be at their lowest ebb, something like a light suddenly blinked on somewhere inside him.

Because he realized that she was not the only one who was stubborn. She was not the only one who was going to live a life less extraordinary because of this.

He was too.

Everything that had come before was going to have been in vain. Even though they belonged together, they weren�t going to be. Because she was frightened. Simply because she was afraid.

She was as scared as he was.

It wasn�t good enough.

"Max?" Liz had reached out her hand as though to comfort him. He glared at it, then up at her, backed up a step.

"I don�t accept it."

She blinked. "What?"

"I said I don�t accept it. It�s not a good enough reason."

She shook her head slightly, as though she was convinced that she had misheard him. "I beg your pardon?"

"I refuse to allow this. You love me. You flat out just admitted it. You know I love you. And so, I will not allow you to just turn your back on that."

Apparently she was beginning to understand him, because her eyes flashed angrily as she snapped, "I don�t think you have much of a say in it, Max."

"Yes I do," Max retorted. "Because we belong together. And so, if I have to convince you, I will. And I won�t stop until I convince you. I have waited two lifetimes to be with you and I�m not going to let a stupid thing like fear come between us now." He folded his arms across his front and stared at her, one eyebrow raised.

"Two lifetimes? What are you talking about?" she screeched at him. Max flinched, but did not back down.

"I think that�s up to you to figure out on your own," he replied, bemused by the expression of outrage that crossed her face. "But just be aware, Liz. This is war. I am going to get you to give in if it�s the last thing I do. I love you and I am not going to let you accept something less than what you deserve, which is to be loved down to the very furthest corner of your soul by the person you most love." He paused, then added, for good measure, because he just liked saying it, "Which is me. So you�re stuck with me."

She stared at him for another long moment, her mouth hanging open in shock, then screeched in outrage again, turned on her heel and marched back into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

"Come out when you get hungry," he called out cheerfully. "Ben and I�ll try and save you a sandwich."

Max made his way back out into the main dome area, jumped when he realized that Ben was standing just within, pressed up against the wall, a sandwich hanging forgotten in his hand. His blue eyes stared at Max accusingly. "You made Liz mad."

"Yup," Max replied. "I think she�s going to be a lot madder before I�m done with her," he added.

Ben looked perplexed for a moment and then he asked, "Are you supposed to make girls you like mad?"

"Not generally," Max answered, returning to the bedroom to get his cell phone, Ben trailing after him. "But this was a special case."

"But you do like Liz, don�t you, Dad?"

"Yes Ben. I like her a lot," Max sighed patiently.

"I don�t think she likes you anymore." Ben shook his head.

"Not right now," Max agreed. "But that�s okay. She will."

He grabbed his phone and went outside. Ben drifted away, appeared to be creeping towards the bathroom, as though he was worried about Liz.

Max wasn�t worried. He could hear her crashing around in the other room, apparently trying to let him know just how angry she really was.

It wasn�t until he had stepped out of doors that Max realized just how late it was. He had left his watch sitting on the dashboard in the Cherokee, having removed it at some point during the long drive.

But when he saw how far the sun had already traveled in its trajectory across the sky, his heart started to thump unevenly.

Michael should have arrived with Isabel and the others long before now. Max glanced down at his phone, wondered if he should try contacting his friend.

But if they had been captured, calling them might lead their enemies right to Ben.

Something had obviously happened. His heart skipped a beat at the sudden flash of imagination that conjured up Isabel and Jesse�s house under attack, Nicholas with little Alexandra under his arm, preparing to blast the child, Michael and Izzy and Maria lying in pools of their own blood, dying.

He never should have left them alone.

Max was just making up his mind to go inside to tell Liz that something was wrong when the cell phone in his hand rang abruptly. He almost dropped it he was so surprised.

He took a deep breath, forcing himself to get it together. It had been a long time since he had felt this exposed, this threatened�in fact, not since he and Ben had managed to evade the Antarian fleet in their flight from the star system of his original birth.

But the adrenaline was beginning to pump through his veins just like in the old days as he hit the talk button on the phone and brought it up to his ear.

"Hello?" He almost expected to hear Nicholas�s grating little voice on the other end. Strange, that after all these years, he still remembered that voice.

But it was Michael. Max felt his heart start to return to its normal pace, along with a stab of healthy annoyance that Michael was clearly taking his sweet time arriving. But Michael�s opening words after replying to Max�s greeting, thrust his irritation out of his mind. "Maxwell, I know I�m not supposed to call, but I am slowly losing it man."

"Michael, where are you? What�s wrong?" He could hear a lot of noise in the background, including, he thought, a baby crying.

"I�m at a truck stop on 285 South," Michael replied wearily. "We�ve been here for close to three hours."

"Did the car break down?" Max demanded. "Who�s with you?"

"I have Maria and Izzy and the baby. Kyle�s on his way. I called him too. I think I need the law, Max. I�m about ready to kill him and it�s going to take Deputy Dawg to stop me. I barely managed to escape him to come call you. I�m on a pay phone," he added unnecessarily as Max listened to the sound of a semi�s horn in the background.

"Who?" Max scowled, simply wanting confirmation that his worst fears had been realized, and inanely wondered why Nicholas was holding the others at a truck stop of all places.

"Liz�s idiot fianc�," Michael snapped back. "Did I ever tell you that he was nice guy?" he asked rhetorically. "Because I was so wrong."

"Dan?" Max was flabbergasted. It was the last thing he had expected. "Why is Dan there?"

"Because he thinks you kidnapped Liz and he followed us after we left Isabel�s." Michael sounded impatient. "Izzy noticed him and we stopped immediately. And now we�re stuck here because he won�t go home and I know that the last thing we need to do is lead him right to Liz. There is no way she�s going to be able to explain this to him. Did she give him some lame-o story about Ben being sick by the way?" Michael added. "Because he didn�t buy it."

Max rubbed his hand across his face. This was bad. Very bad. The last thing they needed right now was a jealous fianc�. Especially considering the fact that Max had just decided that he had every intention of stealing Liz back from said fianc�.

"Where�s Jesse?"

There was a pause. And then Michael replied quietly, obviously not wanting Isabel to overhear him. Max thought he could hear her voice and so she was apparently nearby. "He�s disappeared Maxwell."

"What?" Max yelled. "Did Nicholas get him?"

Oh God. Isabel�s husband. Max had come back and had thrown everyone back into danger and Isabel had lost her husband because of it. She was never going to forgive him!

He was never going to forgive himself.

"Calm down!" Michael ordered. "It wasn�t Nicholas. When we went to get Iz, he was already gone. She said that he got a phone call right after you left with Liz and he went out after that, saying that he had to go back to work for something important. She fell asleep on the couch waiting for him to get home. I woke her up when we got there and she found a note on the kitchen table telling her to take Lexi and leave� that he knew that either you or I was going to show up to take her away, and that she had to go."

Max frowned. "What the hell is going on here Michael?" he asked, not really expecting his friend to answer him. "That is the weirdest thing I have ever heard."

"I know." Michael sighed. "But that isn�t all Maximillian."

What else could have possibly gone wrong in the few short hours since Max and Liz had left Michael and Maria on their way to Isabel�s? Max grimaced, braced himself for the worst.

"What?" There was another long pause. "Michael, just tell me!" Max insisted.

And then Michael said the absolute last thing Max expected. "Maria and I are engaged."

Liz was no longer seething ten minutes later. Instead, she was sitting on the dirty floor leaning up against the equally filthy bathtub, staring straight ahead, her mind whirling in a thousand different directions.

After slamming the bathroom door in Max�s face, she had paced around the small room in a mindless fury, her one desire to break something. Unfortunately there had been nothing around that fit the bill. So she had continued to stalk about, feeling like a caged animal, thinking of numerous ways that she could go about removing that smug smirk from Max Evans�s face the next time she was forced to be in his presence.

It had only been when she had caught a glimpse of her flushed face and wild eyes in the dirty mirror over the sink that she had stopped, taking deep breaths in an attempt to control herself.

Because that one glance had instantly brought to mind the only other time she had so completely lost control of herself. Max had been responsible for that too. The circumstances had been far different, but he had been responsible. Maybe not directly, but in every way that counted.

Liz had not immediately left Roswell after her senior year of high school. She had, to the horror of her parents, deferred her Harvard acceptance for a year and had continued to work in the Crashdown, convinced down to the very marrow of her bones that Max was about to return at any time. She refused to leave town, refused to take the chance that he might show up suddenly, that he might need her and she wouldn�t be there. It was what you did when you loved someone after all. She would not desert him.

It had taken an entirely stupid incident for her to realize that she was the one who had been deserted.

She had been driving back from Hondo, having gone to pick up something for the restaurant for her dad. She had been in her parent�s car, the radio blaring as she sang along to some song or another. She couldn�t remember now what song it had been, but she could still remember how light her heart had felt. She had actually been happy for the first time in a long time.

At some point though, the sound on the radio had begun to fade in and out. The very innocent thought that she should get Max to take a look at it had crossed her mind. She had remembered what Maria had once told her about Isabel having been able to use her powers to fix the radio in the Jetta.

It had actually taken her thirty seconds to remember that Max couldn�t look at it�that Max couldn�t do anything for her anymore. Max was gone. Max had been gone for close to a year at that point and it had taken her almost half a minute to remember it.

It was in that moment that she had realized that she was slowly driving herself insane.

She had stopped the car on the side of the road, had buried her face in her hands and had screamed at the top of her lungs until her voice was hoarse.

When she had finally regained her composure, she had caught a glimpse of herself in the rear-view mirror of the car and her face had looked exactly like it did now�red and blotchy and completely out of control.

In that moment she had decided that he was never going to make her feel that way again.

She had left for Harvard a few months later and had not looked back. The Liz Parker who had loved Max Evans so much she had burned with it, had lost her mind over it, had been gone forever.

But, as she had stared at herself in the mirror moments ago, she had realized that that Liz had only been lying dormant while they had been separated, while she had shut her memories of him out of her life, had completely shut off the emotions he engendered. But now that Liz was back, with a vengeance. And the fact that something deep inside of her was pleased about it made the whole mess even sicker.

It was why she loved Dan now. He was safe, did not stir up these wild emotions, feelings that she did not enjoy, that she was too damn old for.

It was one thing to be a fool in love at eighteen. At twenty-six it was just kind of embarrassing� And it was most definitely crazy.

Which she apparently was, because, for one incredible, horrible moment, while Max had told her that he was not going to give up on her, that he did not accept her decision, all she had wanted to do was throw herself into his arms.

Crazy. Insane. No question about it.

The fact that being around Max recently had also resulted in the one truly calm, peaceful moment of her life during the past eight years did not mean anything. Besides, that could just as easily be attributed to Ben - to the fact that she had been blessed with the presence of the child of her best friend, one she had missed with every fiber of her being since his premature death.

No. It had not been Max, had not been about lying in a bed with him, knowing he was safe and here, for one perfect moment all right with the world. How could it have been when the mere thought of him now made her want to smash something�preferably his perfect face?

It could not have been him, even though in the instant when she had woken up in his arms, when her eyes had momentarily gazed into his, before she had realized where she was, she had felt like she had finally come home again, for the first time in so long, it had almost made her eyes well up with tears of contentment.

But it had been a mistake. She loved him, but he was not right for her. He was controlling and irresponsible and untrustworthy.

Well, maybe not irresponsible�not that any longer. The way he acted about Ben� There was no question in Liz�s mind that the child came first with Max, in every way.

It was an attractive quality, one that she knew he was using to seduce her. Just like he had seduced her the first time, with healing in his hands and stars in his eyes�stars that had shone only for her� until Tess.

The most horrible and confusing part of it all was that she did not doubt that he loved her, that he had always loved her, but, in the end, it had never been enough. He had turned from her in anger once and had slept with Tess, the person who had killed Liz�s best friend, and then he had left her, Liz, behind to follow that snake across the universe.

She could not trust her heart to him again. It was impossible.

How dare he proclaim that he wasn�t going to let her turn her back on him? She wasn�t turning her back on him! She was struggling to maintain her sanity. Giving into him, trusting him again, letting go of someone like Dan was just that after all. Crazy.

Liz could feel the rage beginning to run through her veins again. He was not King Zan anymore, had told her as much himself. If he thought that he could come back here and pick up where he had left off on Antar, ordering everyone around, ordering her around, he was the crazy one!

She could feel herself getting worked up again. Turning on the sink, she watched the water, rusty from years of disuse, rush down the drain. When it had finally cleared, she cupped her hands together, collected a handful and splashed it over her face, willing herself to calm down.

Because she knew that this was what he wanted. He wanted her worked up over him�even if it was in anger. Because anger was better than nothing.

She was not going to give him the satisfaction.

It was only after she turned off the sink that she became aware of the tentative tapping on the door.

"Max! Go away!" she snapped, before she could control herself. She rolled her eyes in annoyance. She did not want him to know that she was still mad. She knew that he liked that he had been able to rile her up the way he had.

Even if he had not said it, his face had shown it. Does Dan ever make you feel this way? Does Dan make you want to kiss him and kill him in the same breath? She had almost been able to hear him asking the questions in her mind, had needed to slam the door to effectively shut them off.

Since the answer to both was an unqualified no, the whole thing had been even more maddening.

She hated him. She really did.

"Liz, it�s me." Ben�s small voice came through the door. "Are you okay?"

Liz blinked, then grimaced. Ben! What had she been thinking? He had to be absolutely terrified by her behavior. Getting the small boy to trust her now, after she had screamed like a banshee at the father he adored� She felt her heart fall at the thought of it.

She had to fix things with him. For Alex�s sake. For Ben�s sake. For her own sake.

Because nothing � not even anger at Max � was going to keep her from being a part of Alex�s son�s life.

Liz opened the door, smiled down at Ben, who was staring at her anxiously.

It had started out forced, the smile, but just seeing him, just seeing Alex reflected back at her in that small face, made it genuine before she even knew what was happening. He might have Tess�s hair and eye color, might posses Tess�s amazing gift, but he was Alex�s son. And she loved him.

"Did my dad make you mad?" Ben asked, his expression worried. He reached out and took her hand, speaking so quickly, he stumbled over the words. "He said� He said he did, but he didn�t sound sorry about it. So I thought I would say sorry� for him. Because he told me that he really likes you and I don�t think he really meant it�" Ben trailed off, apparently losing his train of thought. He looked absolutely bewildered and desperate�like he could not understand any of this, but he knew that he didn�t like it.

She felt another flash of intense annoyance at Max. Liz pulled Ben towards her, hugged him lightly. "Whatever happens between me and your dad has nothing to do with you, sweetie. Whether I�m mad at him or not, it does not mean that I�m mad at you." She stepped back, looked down at him. She could see a glimmer of relief in his blue eyes. "That�s what you thought, huh?"

"No," Ben denied vehemently, shaking his head, but Liz could see that he had. "But I wish you guys would be friends." He paused, then asked carefully. "Don�t you like my dad, Liz?"

She sighed, decided that she had no choice but to reassure him, even though, at the moment, she was practically lying to him. "I like him, Ben. I promise. He�s my friend. But sometimes friends make each other pretty angry."

Ben frowned slightly, biting his lip. Then he blurted, "Did you ever get mad at my other dad too? He was your friend."

Liz felt her heart stop. "You mean my friend Alex?" she asked lightly, trying not to let her voice crack. "Hardly ever." She smiled sadly. No, she and Alex had rarely fought. They had only ever argued one time actually�over Max. When Liz had been keeping Max�s secret from him.

He nodded, as though not surprised. There was a pause, and then, "Did you like him better than my dad�this dad I mean? Is that why you�re so mad?"

"We were a different kind of friends," Liz explained gently. "How much do you know about your other father?" She was trying to keep her voice steady, reassuring, but her entire being was screaming for Alex, for what he had missed, that he was never going to get the chance to be to this child what he would have wanted to be.

"I know his name was Alex Whitman," Ben replied. "He liked computers."

He liked computers. Liz felt tears welling in her eyes. Alex had been about so much more than that. But how could Max have told Ben anything else? He had barely known Alex. Yes, he had trusted him, had almost died with him on several occasions, but they had never been close. In fact, their only real connection had been Liz� And, later, Isabel of course.

That all Ben knew about Alex was that he had liked computers�it was just completely wrong.

Dealing with Max was going to have to wait. This was too important.

"And he was really brave," Ben continued, sounding proud, oblivious to Liz�s resolve. "My dad said so."

"Yes, he was," Liz agreed. She took Ben by the hand, led him out into the main dome area and back into the bedroom. They both flopped back onto the bed, lay staring up at the ceiling. "But that�s not all he was. He was also a real scaredy cat."

"What do you mean?" Ben asked. "How can someone be brave and scared at the same time?"

"Well, let me tell you about the time Maria and I snuck over to Alex�s house in the middle of the night�"

It had taken close to five minutes for Michael to finally stutter an explanation as to how he and Maria had gone from hating each other�s guts only yesterday to engagement today.

"Michael, you do realize that you just made getting engaged sound like a death sentence," Max had managed to ask wryly, after his shock had finally worn off.

Michael had sighed heavily. "It�s not that Max. It�s just that I wish that we could have made this decision under different circumstances. I think she would have appreciated a more romantic venue."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, it happened like five minutes ago. We were having some sort of stupid argument, as usual. I think it was about what to order. I decided I wanted a hamburger instead of a grilled cheese. She got mad." Max had tried to suppress a snort, but had failed miserably. "Are you laughing at me Maxwell?" Michael had demanded, sounding annoyed.

"Er�no. I swear." But he had been having a hard time not laughing, it was true. The complete absurdity of Michael and Maria somehow, finally, getting engaged, in the middle of a crisis, was just so typical, it had made Max so suddenly giddy with happiness, all he had wanted to do was laugh.

He was home.

He was really back on Earth. He had been here for a month, but everything had been so far from typical, so far from usual, he had not really felt it until this moment. He had been in hiding, away from the people he really cared about, but now it was all falling back into place. Finally.

And it wasn�t just Michael and Maria.

It was the feeling of peace that had settled over him when he had finally acknowledged that he was going to be unable to let Liz go, that he was going to have to win her back.

Because, without her, there was no home.

"Anyway," Michael had continued. "Maria started screeching about how this was so typical of me. That I couldn�t make a commitment to anything, even a grilled cheese sandwich. She was holding Lexi at the time and the baby started wailing. Isabel got really pissed off. She started yelling about how we were just both too stubborn to admit that we wanted to get married, but that neither of us was willing to do the asking. I think Dan thought we were all complete psychos. No wonder he thinks you kidnapped Liz."

"And?" Max had asked, shaking his head at Isabel�s obviously correct assessment of the situation, and rolling his eyes at the Dan comment at the same time.

"She was right," Michael had admitted. "I already told you I wanted to get married. But I was sure she didn�t. Turns out she was constantly babbling about not wanting to get married because she didn�t want me to ask unless I really wanted to."

"Michael, you do know that you and Maria are going to have to figure out how to communicate without yelling at some point in your relationship, don�t you?" Max had asked, still smiling.

"Nah," Michael had replied. "It�s when we stop yelling that things get screwed up."

Max had genuinely laughed at that. "So, are you happy about this?"

"Yeah."

"Well then, congratulations."

"Whatever." Max had heard the pleasure in Michael�s voice however. "What I really want to know, is what we�re going to do about this Dan character."

Unfortunately, there was only one thing that could be done about Dan.

Liz was going to have to deal with him. There was no other choice. She had to leave.

Up until this point, she had refused to leave Ben. Even after her panic attack of a few minutes ago and her even more recent anger, she was not going to want to go.

And Max certainly did not want her to. But she had to. The others would not be safe until they arrived here, until they all figured out what they were going to do about Nicholas, and it was clear Dan was not going to let them come without him, which was just unacceptable. Kyle might be able to help, but he couldn�t arrest Dan for being in a public truck stop or on a public highway.

As he moved towards the sound of voices at the back of the dome, the less he wanted to let her go. He couldn�t imagine not being with her, even if she was still angry. Because being with her, in any state, was all he wanted.

It was all he wanted after making sure his son was safe. Which was why she had to go�for now. Whatever transpired after that was up to her. Dan was her fianc� after all. If she wanted to come back, she was going to have to do something about him.

Max had every intention of winning Liz back, but not if it meant putting his son in danger. If she chose Dan, he was going to have to let her go, even if it was going to kill him inside.

And, so, a loophole in his resolve to win her back had been found already. He hated it, but there was no alternative.

He paused outside the door to the bedroom. He could hear Ben and Liz talking, but their voices were so low, it was difficult to make out what they were saying at first. Gradually he began to understand though. When he realized that they were talking about Alex, he smiled slightly to himself.

"�think that maybe I could learn to play the guitar? Like Alex did?" Ben was asking.

"I don�t see why not," Liz replied. "I know Maria still has Alex�s old one. I bet she would let you have it." Max could tell that she was trying to keep her voice steady, but that her grief was beginning to get the better of her. He frowned slightly, wondered how long it had been since she had thought about Alex like this. It was clear that she had still not gotten over his death, even after all this time. Not that he had expected her to, but, he was ashamed to say, it gave him a spark of hope.

She had told him that she had mourned him too. That she had moved on. He was beginning to understand that it had been a lie. She had not moved beyond any of it. Not Alex, not him either.

And yet, the last thing he wanted their new relationship to be built on was pain and heart-ache from the past. What they had been to each other before � before he had left her � had been amazing and heart-rending and life-changing.

But it was over. It had to be. They could never go back. Not to that other lifetime and not to before Tess.

It would all shape where they ended up, but they had to start from scratch, had to make a new life together. They owed it to themselves. They deserved to be happy, together.

It was how he would convince her. It was how he would win her back.

But not now. Not when Ben�s life was in danger.

Soon though. Very soon.

With that thought, he knocked lightly on the half-closed bedroom door. "Hey guys. I really don�t want to interrupt. It sounds like you�re having a really important conversation, but something�s come up. Listen, Liz� We have a bit of a problem."

Liz stood near the open door, watching the road leading up to Atherton�s anxiously. She expected Kyle�s familiar tan all-terrain vehicle to appear at any moment. It had been close to an hour since they had last spoken to him and he had to be only minutes away by now.

When Max had first told her that Dan had followed the others, her first instinct had been to deny it. She had known that he was upset, but he had told her that he trusted her, that he would let her deal with the Max situation for a couple of days before he started to freak out.

She had believed him. Because she knew that he trusted her. It was the basis of their relationship. But his actions over the past few hours clearly demonstrated that he didn�t�trust her that was.

And the absolute worst part of it all was that he shouldn�t. She had done absolutely nothing over the past twenty-four hours that should prompt him to continue to trust her. But she was still hurt�and angry.

She was most angry because his behavior meant that she had to leave Ben. And she had every intention of figuring out a way to return to Alex�s son as quickly as possible.

None of this had anything to do with Max Evans at all. He was the furthest thing from her mind right now. His threats that he was going to find a way to win her back�they were just that. She was not going to give into him. He could watch her with those dark eyes of his as much as wanted to. The longing in them, the love, they did not appeal to her at all.

He made her lose control of herself. It was good that she was getting away from him for a while. She needed some air, some space to regroup.

She needed some time to try and get her emotions back under control. He had her in constant upheaval. She hated it.

She was still furious at Max, had actually refused to speak to him since he had told her about Dan. She had spent the last couple of hours with Ben, just hanging out, playing with the deck of cards the little boy had in his backpack and talking. Max had been around of course, but Liz had not exchanged two words with him. He had basically left them alone anyway, spending most of his time checking in with Michael on the phone, so it had been easy to ignore him.

Well, that wasn�t entirely true. He was certainly not easy to ignore. But she had done her best.

They had finally spoken while they had made plans for the exchange�Liz for Michael, Maria and Isabel. Dan had actually been pleased it seemed when Kyle had shown up at the truck stop. Michael had told them so the last time they had spoken to him. It was Dan, in fact, who had insisted that Kyle go get Liz. This had actually worked out well because Max and Ben could not be left without transportation until the others arrived. It was too dangerous. Kyle had agreed to come and get her and to then drive her back to the truck stop, which was only a couple of hours away it turned out�the others had been more than three quarters of the way to Marathon before they had noticed Dan. It must have been a miracle that they noticed him at all.

Liz wondered momentarily when her fianc� had turned into such a good spy.

And so, it was a convoluted plan, but it was the only way to accomplish this without bringing Dan to Atherton�s, as he still refused to let Michael, Maria and Isabel leave without him.

Liz was actually mildly grateful that Michael had not yet blasted him. She had known that her fianc� could be hard-nosed and tenacious � it was what had gotten him to the top of his field at such a young age � but it had been the first time that any of her friends had witnessed it. She knew that most of them had liked Dan before this whole fiasco had taken place, but she was fairly sure that their opinions were rapidly changing.

She had just sighed in exasperation when Max had told her that apparently Dan wanted Kyle to arrest Max too. The smirk on Max�s face when he mentioned it had annoyed her even more.

"You�re enjoying this, aren�t you?" she had snapped at Max, grabbing the phone from him, wanting to speak to Michael herself, but Max�s best friend had already hung up.

"Not especially," Max had replied, but he had still looked mildly amused. "I don�t like the fact that your fianc� is putting everyone in danger." Liz had glanced at him guiltily. "But, it is quite interesting to see you try and deal with him."

"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?" she had demanded, her back up instantly. She had not yet spoken directly to Dan after all. Max had no idea what he was talking about.

"It means whatever you want it to mean," he had returned, smiling innocently and disappearing into Atherton�s old office under the dome. Liz wasn�t really sure what he was doing down there, but as she moved back into the house now, she could still hear him rummaging around beneath her. Ben had joined him a few minutes ago and Liz could hear their voices rising and falling now as she glanced impatiently at her watch.

How could someone be so eager for something to happen and yet so completely not eager at the same time?

She wanted Kyle to arrive so that she could go and appease Dan, so that she could try and fix their relationship, which was very quickly falling apart, all due to her own actions.

But, on the other hand, she didn�t want to go anywhere. A small part of her just wanted to wash her hands of the whole thing, wanted to call Dan up and tell him to get lost.

And the scariest part of all was that, if she didn�t know for a fact that if she did so Dan would track her down, that he would be even more convinced that Max was holding her against her will somehow, she would have done it. Because, even though she loved him, she knew that the safety and security being with him offered was slowly becoming the least appealing of the options in front of her.

She had been bored with him even before Max had returned. It was only now � now that she had no choice but to face her real feelings � that she realized that a large part of her dissatisfaction with her job at Harvard had been dissatisfaction with life in general with Dan.

She had forgotten what it felt like to have your heart beat so fast in your chest in the company of another, that you almost felt high. She had forgotten the feeling of your blood rushing through your body at hyper speed simply when another person�s hand brushed against you. She had forgotten that waking up in another person�s arms could feel like heaven and hell and home all at the same time.

It didn�t matter that she presently hated Max Evans�s guts. He still did that to her. She was twenty-six years old, no longer eighteen, and she wanted him as much now as she had then. Dan had never made her feel that way, not even in their most intimate moments.

Max had managed to do it in the space of twenty-four hours. With merely a look.

But desire was not enough. She could not risk her heart again. She had told Max that and she truly believed it. The pain the last time she had lost him had been so intense, the feeling of betrayal so bitter, the only way she had been able to survive it had been to shut out the way she felt about him completely. She had made herself forget what it was like to be with him.

She had made herself forget what it felt like to be alive.

When she had mused to herself a couple of days ago that she would be more concerned about her future marriage if she couldn�t think about Max, she had been lying.

Because she had not really been thinking about him at all�not about Max. She had been remembering him as a high school boyfriend, as someone who had been the be all and end of all of her life at the time, but who had faded from her heart, because he had not been anything truly special at all. He had been exciting and dangerous and it had seemed like there could be no one else in the universe to match him, but she had told herself that she was older now, too mature for stupid adolescent romanticism. Max was not the only one for her.

She had been kidding herself.

Being with him� Just being in his presence, she remembered now that it was so much more than that. She had shut it all out, but she could not deny it any longer.

The connection that existed between them� It was magical. It could not be replaced, could not be forgotten, could not be denied.

But it could be ignored. For self-preservation, it had to be ignored.

She would ignore it. And that was all there was to it.

Sighing wearily, she watched as Kyle�s vehicle finally appeared in the distance, the gravel it stirred up having long heralded his approach. The sun was low in the west. Liz felt a pang of guilt that by the time Michael, Isabel and Maria finally made it here, it would have been close to twenty-four hours since she and Max had left them.

Because of Dan, and as a consequence her, her friends had been in danger.

She heard Max and Ben approaching from behind her, Max obviously having heard Kyle�s police vehicle. She didn�t turn to look, simply went out the door and waited for Kyle to pull to a stop in front of her.

But she should have known that leaving would not be as easy as that.

As Kyle hopped out of the car, throwing his deputy�s hat onto his head as he did so, she glanced down as she felt a small hand slide into hers.

"You�re coming back, right?" Ben asked, his blue eyes staring up at her guilelessly. She glanced sharply at Max, whose expression was grim. She didn�t even know why she had done it. She knew that Max would never have used his son in this way. He didn�t have to anyway.

They all knew she was coming back.

"Definitely," Liz replied gently. She smiled slightly, raised a hand and brushed a cobweb out of Ben�s blond curls. "What the heck were you guys doing down there?"

"Dad was looking for something," Ben told her. "I don�t think he found it."

Liz frowned slightly in Max�s direction, but he was not even looking at her anymore, instead was speaking quietly to Kyle.

"Well, you sure made yourself dirty for nothing then," Liz teased. Ben just continued to stare at her, a confused and scared expression on his face. He didn�t understand any of what was going on�why she had to leave, why she and Max were so weird around each other.

All he knew was that someone who was supposed to care about him was leaving him when his life was in danger. It was breaking her heart.

She crouched down, until her eyes were level with his. "I will be back. I have a lot more stuff to tell you about Alex you know. It�s my job." She felt tears filling her eyes and, for the first time, she felt a stab of real hate for Dan�that he was making her leave Ben.

He couldn�t know what was going on, had no idea the pain he was causing her, was only doing what any man in his right mind would do if their fianc�e started acting like a maniac. And yet, she could not forgive him for this.

"I believe you." Ben nodded. He hesitated for a moment and then threw himself against her, almost knocking them both over into the dust. "I love you Liz."

"I love you too," she whispered, stroking his head lovingly.

Over Ben�s shoulder, she could see both Max and Kyle watching them now, Kyle looking sad, Max expressionless.

"C�mon, Benny," Max finally called out, after Liz had clutched Ben to her heart for a period that seemed far too short. "The sooner Liz leaves, the sooner she�ll be back."

Liz slowly pulled away, stood up. Kyle was making his way back to his side of the sheriff�s department vehicle as Max came over and picked Ben up. The little boy threw his arms around his father�s neck, buried his head on his shoulder, but continued to watch Liz out of the corner of his eye.

"I will be back," she told Max calmly as their eyes met.

He didn�t say anything. She frowned slightly, turned, started to move towards the car. At the last moment, before she was beyond his reach, she felt something brush against her.

It was Max, of course. Her entire body � her entire being � told her so.

She did not turn around.

If she turned around, it would be all over. She would throw herself into his arms, all her good intentions, all her resolutions to be strong, to preserve her heart, would be damned.

It was not until she was seated in the passenger seat beside Kyle, silence permeating the vehicle, not until the dome had completely disappeared from sight, that she reached into her pocket and pulled out what she knew Max had put there.

She held it up, saw Kyle glance sideways at it.

The setting sun poured through the front windshield as they drove west, back towards the highway, striking the object in her hand squarely and almost blinding them both.

But she knew exactly what it was. It was a ring.

Not just any ring. The symbol that graced it�s jewel, cool and blue, was a perfect replica of the symbol that had been carved into the pendant Max had given her so long ago before he had almost left her the first time.

It was the whirlwind galaxy.

And suddenly, without any explanation, Max�s voice seemed to drift through her mind, through her very being. He was whispering in her ear, his breath warm against her neck, sending a chill down her spine. She could hear him as she stared at the jewel, tears in her eyes.

I give you my home in exchange for your heart.

"So, that was kind of weird," Kyle finally broke the silence after they had been driving for a good half an hour. He had seemed to understand that Liz wasn�t in any sort of mood for conversation, but she had felt his increasing tension as the miles crept by. She knew that he wanted to talk to her about something.

"What was?" she asked wearily, fingering the ring which she still clutched in her hand. She didn�t know what to do with it, but putting it back in her pocket seemed wrong somehow. As she clenched her fist now she felt the otherworldly metal which formed its ring scrape against the platinum of her engagement ring.

She quickly opened her purse and thrust the Antarian jewel inside.

Kyle did not reply for a long moment, long enough that Liz glanced sharply to the left. She could see that his hands were clenched tightly on the steering wheel as he stared straight ahead out the front windshield.

Liz and Kyle had grown close over the years since Max had left. After graduation he had accepted a baseball scholarship to BU and so they had hung out often during their college days. Liz had actually been the person who had introduced Kyle to his wife Sarah, who had been her roommate during her first year at Harvard. It did not surprise Liz that Dan trusted Kyle to intervene in the situation between she and her friends. They knew each other well and Dan was also aware of the history of antipathy between Max and Kyle, although he thought it was because of the fact that Liz had broken up with Kyle to be with Max in high school.

All of this meant that Liz was more than able to judge Kyle�s moods, and his present one was melancholy, to say the least. She could see the pain etched on his face, although he was trying to hide it.

And Liz suddenly understood.

"It�s because Ben looks so much like her, isn�t it?" Liz asked gently.

She saw him swallow, hard. "I haven�t thought about her in a long time, Liz. But he looks exactly like her." He glanced at her quickly, then returned his eyes to the road. "I had forgotten� I mean, I had forgotten how much�"

"How much you loved her," Liz finished. And she knew he had�loved Tess. He had even admitted it flat-out to her once. He had shown up at her door in Boston, plastered out of his mind after a fraternity event during his sophomore year and had cried in Liz�s arms about her� A full two years after she had been gone from their lives. He had been wracked with guilt that he still missed her, even after they had known what she had done to Alex. But, she had been like a sister to him.

It was not easy to take back your heart after you had given it away. She knew that better than anyone.

I give you my home in exchange for your heart. Max�s voice filtered through her mind again. She frowned, crushed it ruthlessly. The last person she needed to be thinking about right now was Max. Kyle needed her.

Tess had been a different person when she had been with the Valentis. Even now, despising her as she did, Liz could recognize this. Max had even said as much�that Tess had tried to change for them. To Kyle, seeing Ben, seeing her reflected in his features, must have been something of a shock.

"Max told me that she missed you," Liz told him softly.

Kyle jerked around to stare at her. "She� She told him that?"

Well, Max hadn�t exactly told Liz that, but he had implied it, she thought, grimacing slightly. But she lied anyway. "Yes."

"My middle name is Benjamin," Kyle said, after a couple more minutes of silence.

Liz blinked, whipped her head around to stare at him. "It is? I�d forgotten that."

"Yeah."

They sat in silence for the rest of the trip to the truck stop, because there was really nothing else to say.

Liz could see Maria sitting on the hood of Isabel and Jesse�s car as she and Kyle pulled into the parking lot of the truck stop. She slid to the ground when she caught sight of the sheriff�s department vehicle, stood waiting for them, shifting impatiently from foot to foot.

It was close to ten o�clock at night. Liz knew that her best friend and the others had been stranded at the truck stop in the middle of nowhere for close to twelve hours now, but Maria appeared to be still completely energized. Frowning slightly, Liz climbed out of Kyle�s vehicle and right into Maria�s enthusiastic embrace.

"I�ll go find the others," Kyle called over the hood of the car, disappearing into the huge building that was made up of a twenty-four-hour gas station, restaurant, and hotel.

"Lizzie! Thank God you�re here," Maria practically yelped, basically ignoring Kyle altogether. He just rolled his eyes and sauntered off. "This has been hell. I told Dan that he had to let me talk to you first. That he at least owed us all that," she finished disdainfully.

Liz pulled back, sighing heavily. "I am so sorry about this Maria. How are Michael and Izzy?"

"Well, I had to make Michael take a time-out a couple of hours ago." Maria wrinkled her nose at the memory. "I can�t remember exactly what Dan said that set him off, but since everything he has said over the past few hours has been somehow an insult of Max, it must have been something like that." Maria lowered her voice. "Liz, his hand was up and everything. He literally almost blasted him. In public."

Liz shook her head. She wasn�t at all surprised. In fact, she was almost shocked it hadn�t happened earlier. "I�m going to kill him," she muttered. Her annoyance and anger at Dan had faded during the drive, but it was now coming back full-force.

Isabel, Michael and Maria had absolutely nothing to do with any of this. It was completely ridiculous that they had been pulled into it at all.

"How are the others?" Liz asked as she and Maria moved towards the door leading into the restaurant attached to the gas station.

"Isabel and the baby are asleep in the car." Maria gestured behind her. "There�s still no word from Jesse, but Liz, the weird thing is�"

Liz stopped abruptly, holding her hand up. "What do you mean there�s been no word from Jesse? Isn�t he here?"

Maria stared at her. "What? Didn�t Max tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Liz demanded, her eyes narrowing. Although she knew that she hadn�t given Max much of an opportunity to tell her anything, being as she had refused to talk to him for almost the whole day, she still felt a flash of irritation.

"Jesse�s disappeared," Maria replied, frowning. "Why didn�t Max tell you this?" she asked suspiciously.

"Because we�re not presently speaking," Liz told her, sighing. "I don�t think we are anyway. I�m not speaking to him." She just shook her head, suddenly realized how childish the whole thing sounded. They were smack dab in the middle of danger and Max had not given her extremely important information because she had been pouting like a baby. "Maria, I think I�m losing my mind." She dropped her face into her hands, collapsed on the curb in front of the restaurant.

Maria sat down beside her, put her arm around her. "What�s wrong?"

"He�s driving me insane," Liz replied in a muffled voice. "I don�t know what to do." She leaned into her best friend, craving comfort. Only Maria could possibly understand her complete upheaval and confusion.

"You do still love him!" Maria breathed, unable to keep a note of victory from her voice. "I so knew it!"

Liz�s head shot up. She glared at her friend. "Of course I do. But it can�t matter, Maria! I can�t take another chance on him. I barely survived the last one I gave him."

Maria was quite for a long time. "Liz, no one knows better than I do that it isn�t easy. It�s damn hard being in love with a Czechoslovakian. But you and Max�" She shook her head. "You know I like Dan�well, not at the moment obviously�" she amended wryly, "But what you and Max had�"

"Don�t you think I know that?" Liz demanded. "But I can�t live in the past. He�s got Ben to think about now and I have Dan."

Maria smiled slightly. "You do have Dan. I know it. That man is crazy about you, Liz. He�s practically been climbing the walls with worry. You know I�ll support you no matter what you decide, but I have to say, it can work you know. With Max, I mean."

"Maria, he left me. I can�t trust him."

"Michael�s left me more times than I can count Liz," Maria replied, shrugging. "If not physically, then emotionally. But look where we are today."

Liz stared at her. "Are you back together again?" she demanded, felt pleasure at the thought of it. She had not fully understood why Michael and Maria had broken up in the first place, Maria had been so cryptic about it. But if any two people belonged together it was her best friend and Max�s almost brother. They fought, they made up, but, in the end, they completed each other.

Maria rolled her eyes. "Jeez! Max Evans is as close-mouthed with the gossip today as he was ten years ago! We�re engaged! Michael told Max when he spoke to him."

Liz felt her mouth fall open in shock. "Oh my God! Maria!" She reached out an hugged her friend tightly. "I�m so happy for you."

"Yeah, well�" When Liz pulled back again, she saw tears of joy in Maria�s eyes. "You know Liz, since I hit it big, I can have any guy I want, but he�s the only one I�ve ever loved. I don�t know what I would do without him."

Liz hugged her again. "You�d survive Maria, but you wouldn�t really live."

Just like me, Liz thought sadly. And yet, she could not give in. She could not trust him again. It was just impossible.

"Oh Liz�" Maria squeezed her sympathetically, seeming to understand. "We need to live. We have to. It�s the only fair thing."

Liz knew exactly what Maria was talking about. "Because of Alex."

"God, he never even got the chance to live Liz. But he hasn�t left us." Maria was really crying now. "We haven�t even talked about this you know. About Ben I mean." She paused, then whispered. "Did Max tell you how it happened? I just can�t believe that Alex would do that�with Tess I mean."

"He was mind warped," Liz explained sadly, her arm through her friend�s. "Leanna� she didn�t exist. Well, she did, but the girl that Alex was with was Tess."

Maria closed her eyes in horror. "I think Michael and I were both in shock when we first found out. Plus, it was so weird to be back in danger like that� I didn�t even know how to deal with it. That little kid had to save us both. Neither of us knew what to do," she finally managed to croak. "We haven�t told Isabel yet. I think it�s best if Max does it." She smiled slightly through her still tear-stained face. "But Liz� can you believe it? It�s like we still have a piece of him!"

Liz felt tears filling her own eyes. "Maria, he�s so great. Ben, I mean. And Max is so good with him. You wouldn�t even believe it. He�s just a perfect little boy."

Maria frowned slightly. "But, if Ben is Alex�s, then what about Max and the skank?" she asked. "Did they even�"

"I don�t know," Liz replied evenly. "I don�t care. It doesn�t change anything anyway."

But Liz knew that that was not true. It was why she had not even allowed herself to contemplate the fact that if Ben was not Max�s son, she could not know for sure that Max had even been with Tess.

If she found out that Max had not, in fact, slept with Tess, it would change everything. She had forgiven him for it once, when they had gotten back together after Tess had taken off in the granolith, but she had never forgotten about it. It had gnawed at her constantly, had worried her when they had been together that she might not measure up in some way, not measure up to the girl that Max had been destined to be with�the girl he had been with.

Of course, he had never loved Tess. Not even in that other life. And yet, he had potentially slept with her anyway, which almost made it worse. Even though Liz knew intellectually that she had pushed him towards Tess time and again, she still felt hurt over the whole mess.

She had forgiven him long ago for it, but she had never forgotten.

But if he hadn�t slept with her at all�

Maria did not look convinced that it didn�t change things either, but she didn�t comment, linked her arm through Liz�s. "I so cannot wait to meet him again. We are going to be the best aunties in the whole world." They started to walk towards the restaurant again. "Is Max going to let the Whitmans see him?"

"We didn�t really talk about it." Liz grimaced. "I would guess yes, as long as he could be sure that they wouldn�t try and take him away from him. Ben is the center of his life."

"I thought you guys didn�t talk much," Maria commented wickedly. "You seem to know an awful lot about what�s important to him Liz."

"It�s Max," Liz sighed. "I�ve always known."

And that was the biggest problem of all.

Liz�s eyes met Dan�s the instant she entered the greasy spoon. He was sitting in a booth, twirling a fork between his immaculately manicured fingers. She couldn�t see that detail from where she stood, but she knew those hands almost as well as she knew her own.

He was her fianc�. She had loved him for close to four years. She was angry with him, yes, and she was beginning to recognize that perhaps he was not the one for her after all, but she did care about him.

And now she needed to figure out what the hell she was going to do about him.

Kyle and Michael were sitting at the counter, sipping coffee and talking quietly. Liz frowned slightly. She was shocked that Michael hadn�t bolted the instant she and Kyle had arrived. But he looked completely settled.

"What�s that about?" she whispered to Maria, who still stood beside her.

"I think he thinks he has to protect you." Maria sounded amused and affectionate. "For Max."

"Oh for God�s sake, Liz sighed.

"Max is his best friend, Liz." Maria shrugged. "And he was never nearly as pissed at Max as both you and Isabel. He told me once he would have done exactly the same thing Max did. I didn�t speak to him for a week after that, but when I remembered that he had stayed for me� well, I sort of forgave him. See, the thing is, we all would have done it. If we�d thought it was our kid, I mean. Hell, if we�d known Ben was Alex�s, I think we all would have been on that spaceship anyway."

Liz didn�t reply. She couldn�t. Because she knew that Maria was right. Because she had been planning to go with Max all along. Part of the reason she couldn�t trust him was because he had known it and he had left without her anyway. He had said that it had been to protect her, but it had not been his choice to make, to leave her like that.

"You need to leave, Maria," she said instead, forcing her random thoughts about Max aside again. "Max needs you guys. He needs help protecting Ben."

"I know." Maria shook her head. "Just give me a minute with Space boy and we�ll be out of your hair." She started to move away, but then paused. "Are you going back to Roswell?" she asked suddenly, as though it had just occurred to her that Liz might in fact be leaving them all.

"No," Liz replied instantly. "I�ll get Kyle to take me back to Atherton�s as soon as I deal with Dan."

"Liz, he�s not going to let you go off again," Maria told her.

"Yes, he will, or I�ll end it," Liz said firmly.

"Liz�"

"Maria, I�m not trying to come up with excuses to break it off with Dan. I still fully intend to marry him," Liz continued stubbornly. "But Ben has to come first. He has to."

Maria just sighed, quickly hugged her again. "Okay. But be careful. He�s really hurt. If you do intend to marry him, I think you have some bridges to rebuild." When Liz gave her a strange look, she shrugged. "I told you I liked him Liz. I just know that he�s not who you really want. But I told you I�d support you no matter what, and I will."

Maria went over to Michael then, spoke quietly to him. He seemed about to argue, but then appeared to change his mind. He muttered something to Kyle, stood up and followed Maria out the door at the far end of the restaurant.

Liz exchanged a charged glance with Kyle, who raised an eyebrow at her as she passed him. "I�m staying right here, Liz," he muttered.

"Kyle, it�s Dan. He�s not going to hurt me. You can go wait outside," Liz replied, exasperated. Kyle had already agreed that he would take her back to Atherton�s after her conversation with Dan, but Liz certainly didn�t need him hovering over her like some sort of protective older brother.

"Maybe not, but he was plenty steamed when I saw him earlier." Kyle shrugged. "I�m not taking any chances."

"Fine." Liz swallowed, squared her shoulders and marched towards her fianc�, who had set the spoon down with a click and was staring at her, his expression unreadable, his green eyes chilly.

She slid into the booth across from him, narrowed her eyes. "I hope you�re happy with yourself," she said quietly. "I told you I was perfectly safe. And now I�m sitting here with you when I should be with a very sick little boy."

She chose not to reflect on the fact that she didn�t even feel guilty lying to him anymore. It was not a good sign she knew. Their relationship was teetering on very shaky ground at the moment. And yet, now that she sat across from him, only moments after she had told Maria that she still intended to marry him, she couldn�t bring herself to care.

Because all she knew was that the last place on the face of the planet she wanted to be was in this booth. And that was not how one was supposed to feel about one�s fianc�, three days before the wedding, even if one was as furious as all get out at said fianc�.

She had to break up with him. It was as simple as that.

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