| No. This cannot be. This cannot be happening. No. Luthien, my Luthien, she cannot die. They stare at me with pity in their eyes, pity for my loss. I cannot stand their stares any longer. I turn and walk, no flee from the room, with their words echoing in my mind. �We're sorry. There was nothing we could do.� My grief carries me on. I do not know where I am going but my destination does not matter. All that matters is that I must walk out my grief, walk out my anger. I halt. My grief, my anger, my desolation, my devastation, my isolation are all beginning to transmutate. I do not think that there is a name for the emotion that holds me in its thrall. Then I make my decision. I know what I must do. I turn and walk back to the city. I stand on the walls of the cit, looking down. I do not fear the height, for I am past fear. I raise my head and look forward. The stunning view has no impact on me; it is a desolate wasteland without her. I speak to her as if she is beside me. �I cannot live without her. This is meant literally. I cannot live. I am sorry, all of you. Without Luthien... my world is dark and dead. I grow weary of this place. Please understand. I will miss you all. Hopefully we will be back here soon. Goodbye.� Then I step forward. Falling. One instant of indescribable pain. Then nothing. Darkness. Oblivion. Bliss. |
| Sorrow to Oblivion |
| This was written on my way back home from the college computers. I had been having a bad day,, and people had been angsting on MESPT, so I came up with this. Quite theraputic. |