POLITICALLY CORRECT

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

She is not a BABE or a CHICK.........she is a BREASTED AMERICAN.

She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER.......she is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.

She is not EASY.......she is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSABLE.

She is not a TEASE or a FLIRT.......she engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.

She is not DUMB........she is A DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION HIGHWAY.

She has not BEEN AROUND........she is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.

She does not GET YOU EXCITED..........she causes TEMPORARY BLOOD DISPLACEMENT.

She is not KINKY.............she is a CREATIVE CARETAKER.

She does not have a KILLER BODY.............she is TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE.

She is not an AIRHEAD.............she is REALITY IMPARED.

She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY................she gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.

She is not HORNEY................she is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.

She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS.............she is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.

She does not NAG.................she becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.

She is not a SLUT............she is SEXUALLY EXTRAVERTED.

She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS..............she is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.

She is not a TWO BIT WHORE............she is a LOW COST PROVIDER.

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

He does not have a BEER GUT................he has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.

He is not a BAD DANCER................he is OVERLY CACASIAN.

He does not GET LOST...................he INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.

He is not BALDING....................he is FOLICLE REGRESSING.

He is not a CRADDLE ROBBER.......he prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS

He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK......he becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.

He does not act like a TOTAL-ASS..........he develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.

He is not a SEX MACHINE...........he is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED.

He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG.......he has SWINE EMPATHY.

He is not AFFRAID OF COMMITMENT............he is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.

He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES..............he has an INTROSPECTIVE GRAPHIC MOMENT

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