Trust In Me by Michelle ([email protected]) Chapter 31 ...And I can see your face Your kiss I still can taste Not a memory erased Oh how I see your star shining down on me And I'd do anything If I could just be right there Where you are... "Sure Kev, What's on your mind baby?" "Bec, I love you with all my heart, ya know that right?" "Of course I know Kevin. I'll always love you too." Whispering close to her ear, his minty breath warming her, "Okay then, knowing that, it sets my mind at ease. Baby...I can't imagine my life without you in it. I know my life is crazy...always on the run, never in one place long enough to call home. But I'd like to make a home with you. Any place I am, as long as you are there too, I feel safe, at home in your arms. I want to feel that way forever. I want you with me always." ...Now baby there are times when selfishly I'm wishing that you were here with me So I can wipe the tears from your eyes and make you see That every night while you are dreamin' I'm here to guard you from afar And any time I feel alone I close my eyes and dream of where you are... "Oh, Becca...I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't want to guard you from afar. I want to be there to love and protect you all the time, always. If I'm not there to wipe away the tears, who will be? I want it to be me, I never want us to be alone." She watched him. Her eyes comforting his, her lip quivering at his words of love and devotion. She smiled warmly, encouraging him to go on. Moving his hand from her back, he took her wrist and pulled her lovingly out of the club, "Baby, come on...I can't do this in here. Come outside with me!" They ran out into the cool night air. The smoke from their breath now visible, clouding together as one, as they huddled outside on a nearby park bench to keep warm. His coat now around her shoulders, she stared into his endless eyes. "Kevin..." "Wait...don't say a word yet. I want to do this right. Afterall, what else would you expect from a Kentucky grown Southern gentleman?" Her only response was a giggle, not wanting to interrupt something Kev had clearly given a lot of thought to. Holding her hand, he got up off the bench, and lowered himself to the grassy ground. He was down on one knee. Then it hit her, all at once. She gasped in disbelief. "Oh Kevin...I..Baby..." "Shh..." he hushed her, his finger covering her trembling lips. "Rebecca I love you. Love your every breath, Love your every thought, Love you for loving me, I love everything that makes YOU, you." "Bec, will you marry me?" The tears flew from her eyes almost faster than the words registered in her head. Against her every heartbeat, she willed herself to say words she never thought were possible. "Kevin, I can't...". With that last word, she pulled away from his grip, and still wearing his coat, ran away into the dark, starlit night...leaving Kevin alone on the worn bench, his head buried in his paino-tuned hands. He let his own tears cascade down his cheek into the moonlit night sky. ...And Baby I still believe I've got to believe I will touch you that sweet day That you take me there Where you are, Oh where you are I still believe I've got to believe I'll always be waiting here... ***At the same time*** "AJ, I'm so cold. It's freezing out here." "Come here baby." he whispered, his own hands chilled as well. He put his arms around her in an effort to take the chill away from them both. He kissed her neck playfully, hoping his touch would provide her with some warmth. At the feel of his kisses, she took his cold fingertips and blew onto them, warming them. That worked for a little while, but AJ was getting frustrated. This was in no way, shape or form, how he envisioned this night to be. "OKAY...this is CRAZY! We're getting inside...NOW! Help me out here Anna...between the both of us, we have to have something that can pick a lock." "Pick the lock?!?!? AJ that's breaking and entering!" He rolled his eyes playfully, "Not when it's YOUR apartment and you locked the only two sets of keys inside!" "Oh, guess you're right. But I've only got a lipstick and few tissues. What can you do with that 'J?" "Damn, not much." He emptied his own pockets...gum, some cash, a condom, and a comb. "Great 'J...so unless you plan on singing into the comb for money, while chewing on a stick of Winterfresh, all while trying to seduce me at the same time...we're screwed!" "Not a bad idea...hehe...nevermind." He looked back at her, her head shifting downwards, her sandaled feet shuffling from one side to the next. Suddenly, he got it. "Wait...Anna, take out your hair." "AJ, I really don't think it is the time or place for you to be telling me to..." He shook his head back and forth, "No, no..not that. Give me one of your bobby pins. I've got an idea!" ***At Brian's Place*** "Tell you how much....I would love it if you could doggie sit Tyke while I was on tour." Brian mumbled, his true words getting lost somewhere along the way. Michelle, slightly disappointed, and sorta hoping for something more than a baby-sitting request, answered him halfheartedly, "Sure Brian. Of course I'll look after the little rascal. It's no problem, I'd be thrilled to have him." A weak smile showed through. Brian gulped, "Thanks hunny, ya see...I was supposed to take him with me on tour, but it turns out that Kevin is bringing Becca and she's allergic to dogs, and she kinda got preference over Tyke...I dunno why? Tyke was invited first, but Kev seemed to have a different opinion on that topic...he didn't want Bec sneezing all over the place." "Ya, I understand. It'll just be me and Tyke. We'll bond...you just better tell him not to eat any of my shoes!" She added with a slight laugh, as her thoughts wandered on what he REALLY wanted to tell her. She was good enough to doggie sit, but did he trust her enough to share his true feelings? He hugged her quickly. Michelle pulled out of his embrace, unsure if she felt right in his arms. She looked away, distant and now distracted. He watched her look away. Brian exhaled deeply as he organized his thoughts in his head. "She can tell that's NOT what I wanted to say. Well, Brian...of course she can tell...it's obvious, she pulled away and now she thinks you don't love her." he mumbled to himself, hoping she couldn't tell what he was thinking. He grabbed her arm, stopping her from retreating to the other room, he screamed, "Wait!!" She stopped, her eyes looking in his once again. She was silent, and waited. "That's not what I needed to tell you." He blushed, and a smirk emerged from his tanned, adorable face. Michelle's own smile widened, and in a small voice she whispered, " I was hoping to hear you say that B!" His feet shuffling nervously, but his eye contact clear, "What I needed to say was that I LOVE YOU." ***Around the same time*** "I think, I hope it's the same thing I'm wishing for." Howie walked over to where Selena sat. His arms were outstretched to hold her and his smile was welcoming. She excepted his comforting embrace with ease, although slightly surprised, she was finally once again content within his grip. They sat together on the edge of the fountain, the water splashing and their hearts waving. Sel rested her head against his familiar shoulder, the light smell of fabric softener lingering on his shirt, mixing with hints of his Cool Waters cologne. Still against his strong chest, she moved her head so her eyes could look into his. "Howie, do you have another penny?" Her question brought a laugh from his sweet lips. He caressed her dark hair, curling the tendrils around his fingertips. Reaching for another penny from his pocket he answered her sincerely, "Wanna make another wish?" "Yes, but let's make it together, okay?" "Of course. What did you have in mind, since my wish is already sitting in my arms?" She blushed at his compliment. "Well, let's make it more of a promise. A promise to love..." "And forgive..." he added importantly. "Yes, most importantly to forgive, and to TRUST IN ME." she whispered to him, pledging her love once again. He took in her scent, of vanilla and berries mixed into one, "Ya know, I never stopped loving you Sel." "Really? I never stopped either. You were all I thought about. Night and day...always Howie, you were on my mind. Wondering if you could ever love me again. So all is forgiven?" "Forgiven and forgotten. But, we have to work at this Sel. God, I love you...my passion is flaming...but we have to learn to trust each other again. But right now, all I want to do is pull you closer and kiss all the bad stuff away." "Oh, Howie, then let your lips do the talking." She was silenced by his lips connecting with hers. Tongues swirling, they were wishing away into their own little world. There's nothing missing in my heart. ***A Little Detour to Liz's Apartment*** "Oh Gosh, come on! Liz, walk! You can't be THAT drunk...you were only missing for an hour." She looked up at him, her arms slung around his shoulders for balance, "I'm not drunk Nicky...you just don't know how to loosen up!" she slurred. "Yes, you are. And NO I don't find it enjoyable to get myself smashed...you're gonna have some hangover tomorrow. Hurry up and get inside, Melanie is waiting for me and you're making me extremely late." He found her keys in her purse, and opened her apartment door. He practically had to drag her over to the couch, where he sat her down and put her feet up. He fixed her a quick cup of coffee, and planned to say good-bye as quickly as possible. "Okay, Liz..I'm going now. Just sleep it off." He turned to leave, "Wait Nick!" she yelled sluggishly, "Thanks. Ya know, I still love you. I just don't know what you see in her...she's never gonna be the woman I am." Just then, she pulled his blond head roughly down to hers and forced her lips on his. He pulled away in disgust. "What the hell? Get off me. God you really ARE drunk. And another thing...you've got one thing right. Melanie will never be the woman you are! Because she's so much more than you could ever even dream of being! SO much more than you will ever be Liz. This is the last time I'm saying good-bye!" Wiping his lips, he slammed the door and left her to cry herself into a drunken sleep. Distracted at her sudden 'romantic' drunken outburst, Nick plummeted down the stairs two at a time, almost tripping because of his lack of attention. He glanced at his watch. 2:30 am...he was late, really late. He promised Mel he'd come straight home after the awards, and she seemed so content with that...not giving him a hard time about Liz, but once again Liz had distracted him (as always). Hopping into his car, he sped out of the parking spot and passing a red light, followed the streets that led to Mel's house. ***20 Minutes Later** Melanie sat curled up on the couch asleep. Her head was back resting on her pillow. Her bags still sat neatly on the tile floor next to the door. Her soft breath was the only sound heard, until a soft knock echoed from the front door. Nick had reached her apartment, and hoped she would still be awake. He peered in from a slightly opened window. No such luck, she was fast asleep. He took a moment, just watching her...her short dark hair surrounding her head upon her white pillow, her body moving slightly up and down rhythmically with her breath. He sighed, she was a sleeping beauty...his beauty. He searched around for spare key. (AN: ok, I realize this is NYC and you probably wouldn't have a spare key laying around...not safe!...but for the sake of the story flowing, just play along! thanks readers!) After a few minutes of searching, he found a copy of the key secure under a flower pot of sunflowers. He lifted the pot with ease, and snatched the key, letting himself into the apartment quietly. He walked into the familiar home, taking his shoes off at the side of the door. Nick spotted the bags packed at the foot of the door. He shut his eyes...damn, he hoped she still planned on taking those bags tomorrow. She'd forgive him for being late, he'd explain the whole Liz situation, minus the kiss part, and she'd understand. She always did. Taking his jacket off, he threw it on the chair right near the couch. Undressing from the show, he stripped down to T-shirt and boxers. (his dress pants were so uncomfortable, and he hoped she wouldn't mind his lack of clothing :) ) Moving the blanket, he crawled onto the couch, snuggling next to Mel. Just before turning the lamp off, he picked his head up and kissed her goodnight. His lips brushed her softly, just enough to let her know he was there and that he still cared. He had never felt so close to her. Normally, sleeping next to each other was off limits because neither of them were sure that they could control all the raging feelings of desire. But tonight, he felt he needed to be near her, just to hold her. He lay content in her arms, as he drifted into a dreamful sleep. ***Finally Inside Anna's Apartment*** "AJ...where did you learn to do that?" "Do what...pick the lock?" "Ya, it's not everyday that you're required to break a lock with bobby pins!!� "Ohh, that..hmmm...I guess I developed that skill on tour." "What?! On tour...how so?" she giggled, pulling him closer, their bodies finding warmth again. "Ya, well Nick used to lock up his candy and fave foods when we first started touring..he was like 13,14 then. It was the funniest thing; he had this cheap little safe. Just to piss him off, the guys and I used to break into it, using whatever was handy...and eat all his stuff!" "You guys were so mean to him...no wonder he was always starting fights and everything..you tortured him!" She teased, as he pulled his hands around her skinny waist. Whispering playfully just before he kissed her, "Well, it was just that he was soooo annoying!" She pulled away from his warming kiss, "Ya know 'J, I'm gonna miss you like crazy." Holding her, and resting his head to her autumn hair, "I know, me too Anna, me too." "So baby, you ready to say good-bye?" AJ questioned seductively as he lightly pushed the hair from her dark eyes. Tilting her head to one side she answered, "Umm, not say good-bye...cause that would imply that you're not returning, AND that cute little butt of yours better be coming back 'J!" "Oh..that'll be coming back...and a few other cute items as well!" His grin at that moment could have sustained her breath for a thousand lifetimes. Pulling at the neck of his shirt, she wiggled her eyebrows, and sexily commanded, "Come here!" AJ obeyed and let her unbutton his shirt, revealing his slightly shaved, well developed chest. His hands found the zipper to her skirt, and his cold hands brushed against her warm skin, making her shiver with anticipation. Her mouth found his and the two began their long awaited love session. ****Later that Night*** Wiping the tears from his eyes, Kevin decided it was time to fight fire with fire. He was tired of Becca's hot/cold games. One second she was telling him how she couldn't imagine her life without him, and the next second, she was running off claiming she couldn't marry him. He loved her with his entire heart. And he knew she did too...something was wrong, very wrong. Afterall, they were scheduled to go on tour together tomorrow. He had to find her. Kevin needed to hear her voice and make sure she was okay. Make sure he was okay. Hopping into his car, he started his mission. He stopped at her favorite coffee shop, looked in the windows of a few late night bars (not her scene), drove back to the bench where they sat before (hoping she would have returned). He sped over to her apartment, but the lights were out and the curtains were still drawn...it was empty...no Becca. In fact, all the places he thought she'd be were empty. After hours of just driving around and looking for her, praying nothing bad had happened to her while out alone in the night, he gave up. Completely unlike Kev to give up, but he did. He simply didn't know where else to look. He called her house from his cell phone once again. No answer...she still wasn't home. Disgusted and worried, he trudged home. He opened the door to his hotel room lifelessly...he felt so awful...there was nothing left without her. Not bothering to turn on the lights, for fear the brightness would ruin his sulky mood, he plopped onto the couch. He was shivering, partly cold, and partly because his body felt like he was in shock. The rejection hit him hard, and he was so scared for Bec. Seconds passed, when he heard sniffling in the corner of the room. He looked up quickly...he knew that cry. "BEC! Is that you?" He leaped up off the couch, and ran to her side. She sat scrunched in a ball in the corner of his hotel room, her eyes wet with pouring tears. His arms flew around her, forgetting his fury at the sight of her pain. He buried his head in her sunny blond hair, sniffing in her coconut shampoo. Still in the dark, he pulled her up from the floor, and sat her on the couch. She didn't speak at word, instead she cried. Tripping over a few magazines, he turned on the lights. "Becca please stop crying. Baby please..." Through her sniffles she choked out, "Oh Kevin..I'm so sorry. I jusy can't do this." Desperately he shouted, "Do What?" Looking in his swirling eyes she whispered painfully, "Marry you." Turning his face and exhaling deeply at her refusal, he questioned her plainly, "Rebecca, do you still love me?" Her eyes scared and unsure, "Of course I do." His expression turning confused and slightly disgusted, "Than why won't you marry me...at least tell me that." "I can't commit myself to you Kevin. It's not fair to you...not fair for you to have to be committed to me." "What the hell are you talking about?" getting more angry everytime she claimed her love wasn't worthy of him. "Kevin, maybe not right now...but someday you'll understand why I'm doing this. Someday...when you're ready to settle down and start a family. That's when you'll know it never could have worked between us." Suddenly Kevin understood what this was all about. "Becca look at me." He commanded, turning her face to his. "I love you, and you love me. I know what I am committing myself to...God...I'm giving my heart to you, and i was hoping you'd do the same. When I said I wanted to marry you, I meant it. I meant that I wanted to marry and love all the things about you...including the issue of ...of umm..." "See! You can't even say it Kev! The issue of NEVER being able to have our own child! Say it...Kevin. It's REAL!" Her arms swung wildly as if to get her point across more clearly. Her whole body shook in pain and uncertainty. "Becca, Baby..I know, I know..." He surrounded her in his muscled arms, burying his face in her blond hair , as she let her body surrender to his secure grip. He felt her relax and sob into his chest. After letting her cry out all her tears (he knew that she almost always felt a little better after a good cry), he still held her close. "Becca listen, I don't know how to fix this. It's no one's fault...you couldn't help this, and neither could I. But I love you, and we can get through this together. Together...Bec...it's the only way. I want to marry you, because I can't live my life without you in it. We will have a family someday...whether we adopt kids or you have them yourself...that doesn't matter to me." "Oh Kevin, you can't say that..you don't know how you'll feel 10 years down the road." "NO! Listen to what I'm telling you Bec. I love you and that is ALL that matters. We are going to love our kids with all our hearts...don't you think for even a second that either of us would love a child any differently if it wasn't our own flesh and blood. We would still love her with every ounce of what we have Becca. So please, Marry me." "Her, Kevin...does that mean you want a little girl someday?" He smiled. "Maybe." Eyebrows now smirking upward, "Does that mean you'll marry me?" Her eyes lit up, no more tears falling, instead a ray of happiness shined through. "Yes.." "Thank GOD...I thought I would never hear those words leave your mouth..." "Not so fast Mr. Richardson...I'll marry you on one condition." she laughed. "Oh ya, what's that?" "You gotta do one of your little 'booty-shaking' dances, with that cute little butt of yours." "Oh the things I do for you!" he teased, as he jumped up off the couch and began to shake what his mama gave him. A few minutes later..."Kevin so, a girl, huh?" "Heck ya, daddy's little girl!" "Kevin, I love you. And you gotta believe that I wanted to say 'yes' from the very beginning." "I know, you were just scared..." "And I wanted to protect you." "I'm protected, cause I have you." With that he carried her in his arms and they fell onto the bed in tumble together. ***A Little Later that same Night*** Michelle's smile could have lit up all of NYC, and Brian's words could have echoed forever, and still, she could not believe it. For so long she had waited to fall in love. Reality had taught her to forget about the fairytales...but she never would give them up. They were special to her, like a dream still very awake in a child's mind. And now, after years of waiting for her prince charming, he was holding her, saying how much he loved her. "Oh Brian, I love you too. Oh gosh...I've loved you for so long..." Tears of happiness now welling in her eyes, "My dream...it's finally coming true." He held her tighter, promising to make her every wish a reality. Slowly, but forcefully, his mouth found hers, colliding with a newfound passion. Their words of love seemed to fuel a fire lit by two people who had given themselves to each other so completely. Her hands ran along the back of his shirt, rubbing against the soft material. His neck scented with Safari, filled Michelle's nose warmly, reminding her of just how adorable this man really was. She could feel his hands wander to the slit that lined her thigh. His touch was so hot, so pleasantly unexpected. In a moment's notice, Brian lifted her up, and carried her delicately to his bedroom. She kissed him passionately while in his arms. Together, they landed on the blue and green checkered bedspread. Arms and limbs tangled, their kiss never broke. She motioned to unbutton his shirt, and then succeeded in exposing his chiseled upper body. His soft fingertips reached the zipper of her evening gown. Inch by inch, it slid down, his anticipation growing. A few more minutes passed, causing more clothing to fall to the floor. Michelle quivered, his touch cascading to the small of her back. She wanted nothing more to stay with him on this night, the night they proclaimed their love to one another. Brain moaned slightly as he let her hands caress his bare back. He wanted so much to be with her, to make love to her tonight. Michelle knew she would only be able to think logically for a few short seconds longer, her desire was building, as was his, and soon there would be no holding back. Pulling away to face him, she asked out of breath, "Brian, baby...I love you, but...ummm, do you have protection?" His eyes widened. By his perplexed look, she guessed he had almost forgotten. "Oh god...ya...I wasn't thinking, just preoccupied," he smiled a devilish grin. She waited impatiently for him to return from the bathroom. He seemed to be taking a bit longer than she thought he would. "Brian...you coming back baby?" "Uhh, ya just a sec...I seem to have one slight problem." Michelle giggled, "Ok what's wrong hunny?" "Guess what I forgot to buy at the drugstore." His cheeks turned a crimson red. "You didn't...Brian..." she couldn't finish her sentence because the look on his blushing face was too much for her to bare without laughing hysterically. He walked back to the bed slowly, in nothing but silk boxers, and sat next to her, dressed only in undies and a lace bra. He looked her up and down, innocently, yet raging with heat, "So this is what I'm missing? We can't do this tonight, can we?" "Oh, man Brian...I want to." She took a deep breath, "But..." "No, it's my own fault...I wasn't...wasn't prepared. So now we wait. What if you got..." "I know...neither of us are ready for that. "I love you Michelle, and I'll wait as long as I have to." "Hopefully, it won't be too long...when is you first break from the tour?" "2 months." "Two long months" "Damn, you look so gorgeous...and tempting!" He whispered into her ear before licking her soft flesh. His arms around her bare waste, he tickled her. She shouted, "I love you too...and just think of the anticipation for next time, well, our first time together. "Hell ya..." His voice trailed to a moan as her hands encircled his waist. "Hey Michelle...no teasing." "Ditto for you Bri!" "Baby, would you settle for a night wrapped up in my arms...granted, making love to you would have been better, but hey I'll take you any way I can." "Ohh sounds like heaven, and by the way...did I tell you how amazing you smell?" The pleasantly tortured couple drifted to sleep in each others arms. Their partially bare bodies touching, connecting with such a force, that it was unthinkable that they could resist each other for a moment longer. But, they had, and respected each other more for it. Next time, next time. ****In the Newspaper Office**** "Do you have it?" "Yes, and the pictures too." "Okay, so it's set to print tomorrow?" "Yes, completely ready to go." "Wonderful...they won't expect this one." "It'll hit NY and other major cities tomorrow at noon, and Europe in 3 days." "Perfect, thank you Karen." Next: Chapter 32 -FanFics -Home