We must
be willing to let go of the life we have planned,
so as to
have the life that is waiting for us-E.M. Forster
Kyoto,
Sengoku Jidai, circa 1542
She was
doing it again.
Watching
him.
He could feel her walking quietly behind him,
looking at his back like he was about to drop dead or something. It was
disconcerting. It was unusual. It was-
Intriguing.
Pensively,
Miroku slowed his step, watching the rest of the small group walk ahead.
Inuyasha was trudging through the tall, glistening grass with his patented
scowl, while Shippou, half-asleep, dangled from the hanyou's tattered sleeve.
Sango, her hips swaying innocently, lagged behind the two, hiding an occasional
yawn.
Miroku
grinned wistfully.
He
really did love that outfit, what with its curves and the-
"Miroku-sama?"
came a small voice.
Kagome
had finally caught up to him.
Miroku
gave her a friendly smile, noting, with no small amount of discomfort, the
glare Inuyasha had tossed him over his shoulder.
"Is
something the matter, Kagome-sama?" Miroku asked quietly. Frankly, he'd
been tiptoeing around Kagome for the past few weeks, ever since-
"No,"
she said, apparently content to walk by his side in silence.
Miroku
frowned. She'd been doing that a lot lately, too.
"I
was just... thinking," she said uncomfortably, twisting her fingers as
they walked. "Maybe you should drink less of your... um, special
tea."
Miroku
blinked.
What?
"Because,
well, you only have one liver," she mumbled restlessly, glancing up at him
through thick, dark eyelashes.
"Kag-"
"And,
you know, it's a very important organ. You can't-you can't live without your
liver."
Miroku
watched her bewilderedly.
She's
doing it again.
Miroku
wondered, forcing himself to look away from her soft, worried features, why she
seemed so concerned about him lately. Sometimes-and he knew it was a thoroughly
laughable assumption-it seemed as though she was fixating on his... his-
Death. But-
Why him?
Why now?
Miroku
ducked.
A large,
dirty pebble whizzed by his head. Inuyasha stood a few feet away, glaring
sharply, faint carnage in his eyes.
Oh.
"And,"
continued Kagome obliviously, "your robes-"
Maybe
this was Kagome's way of dealing. Of taking her mind off her own problems. Off
Inuyasha.
"-I
mean, they're dark-"
But. Should he? Should he let her worry about him?
Was it the right thing to do?
He hated
to admit it, but he was... pleased this past week. It felt nice to have someone worry so openly about
him. Not infrequently, he felt as if he were exploiting her good intentions,
trying to usurp Inuyasha's dominion over her. Which was-well, it was
ridiculous, considering he'd been made well-awarethat
Kagome belonged with Inuyasha. To Inuyasha.
"-and
it's a universally-known fact that dark colors attract sun, a lot, so... so..." she
trailed off, then tugged at his sleeve. "Heat stroke!"
Miroku
couldn't help it.
A wicked
grin upturned his features, his shoulders slumping dramatically. With
well-practiced pomposity, he clasped her little hands in his, pausing airily in
the middle of the trodden path. "I understand perfectly now,
Kagome-sama."
"Um?"
Kagome raised a dainty eyebrow, focusing her adorably flustered gaze on his
eyes, but, to his mild surprise, she made no attempt to extract herself from
his theatrical embrace.
"You're
tying to tell me you want to see me naked," he finished with a sensational
flourish. "Ah! I will be more than happy to disrobe for a beautiful girl
such as yourse-"
"Hiraikotsu!"
"Kaze no Kizu!"
Ow.
"Are
you all right, Kagome-chan?" asked Sango, shifting her boomerang with a
menacing scowl. "Is he dead? And if not, do you need me to finish him
off?"
"Stupid
monk," growled Inuyasha, but somehow, even his snarling sounded
indifferent and distracted. Sluggishly, the hanyou continued on his path,
trying to detach the sleeping kitsune from his sleeve with a mildly annoyed glower.
"Uh...
I'm-I'm okay, Sango-chan!" said Kagome loudly, then knelt down to inspect
Miroku's throbbing head. "I'm sorry," she whispered gently as
the rest of the group moved on with a few muttered curses, her bottom lip
trembling peculiarly.
Unh...
She was apologizing to him?
Stunned,
Miroku let her touch the aching bruise on his forehead, watching her blue eyes
widen innocently with every flinch. Her warm, slender fingers ran over the tiny
gash lightly, fluttering indecisively as if it were a mortal wound, not a mere
scrape. And-
Her
eyes. That look.
Something
loosened in his chest as he exhaled sharply.
What was
going on?
"Kagome-sama,"
he said firmly. "What's wrong?"
She
looked at him, startled, like he'd caught her doing something inappropriate.
"N-nothing?"
Very
convincing.
With a
groan, Miroku slowly stood up, pulling her with him. Casting a cautious glance
at the remainder of the group in the distance, he turned to the girl, trying
very hard not to touch her again.
She'd
wanted to tell him something a moment ago. He was sure of it. But. What was it?
Her
shoulders were oddly stiff, her back was painfully straight, and her eyes were
darting about, fixing their gaze on anything but him.
"Please,"
he heard himself say.
He had
to know. For some odd reason, he had to.
To his
chagrin, he was-he was worried about her. It was hard to avoid the
rush of concern he felt whenever he'd catch a glimpse of her. Ever since-ever
since he'd seen that... enlightened look on Inuyasha's face, he knew. He
knew. It was absolutely, utterly, thoroughly hopeless.
Irreparable. Impossible. Kagome would never be able to surmount or erase
Kikyou's memory. She would never want to.
She'd
never be Kagome to Inuyasha. She'd never be first.
And-
-she'd
never give up. Or mind in the slightest.
Miroku
sighed in frustration, turning away. It was none of his business. It wasn't.
If she
was that stupid-
"I
can't tell you."
Miroku
froze. A strange sense of déjà vu tickled the back of his neck, creeping into
his consciousness, wrapping its icy fingers around him.
"I
can't tell you," she repeated, fidgeting with a tall strand of grass,
twisting it around her fingers. Then, quickly, she glanced up with a painfully
cheerful smile, looking younger than he thought she was. "Come on,
Miroku-sama! Let's go before Inuyasha... um. Well, two words. Raging
apoplexy."
Miroku
found himself smiling back, wondering all the while why he was indulging her.
"You know," he began innocently as they descended the path again,
"I never did hear you say no."
"What?"
she flushed, tucking a stray curl of inky hair behind her ear.
A tiny
smirk played about his lips. He had to do it. Had to. It would be good for her.
If she couldn't hit Inuyasha-
"When
we met," he elaborated theatrically, watching two particularly bright
spots spread across her pink cheeks. "When I asked you to bear me a
son," he waggled his bushy eyebrows. "You never said no."
Ow.
He rubbed
his forearm, grinning playfully. Mission accomplished. Though, really, he
needed to stop collecting bruises for her benefit. It was... unsettling.
"It's
been a while," he said cheerfully, "I forgot how hard you hit."
She
stiffened abruptly.
What?
What did he say?
She was
watching him again, observing his every movement with those curious blue eyes.
Suddenly, he had the feeling she knew something he didn't.
"Humm.
So... what did I say?" she asked emphatically,
cocking her head to one side.
With a
chuckle, he walked past her, waving a nonchalant hand. "You said, and I
quote," he pitched his voice higher, in a droll imitation of hers,
"'And why would I do that?'"
Kagome
jogged up to him, a serious expression on her pretty face.
"Um,"
she mumbled shyly. "How-how come you remember that?"
Miroku
froze.
Why did he remember?
Flustered,
he bent to pick up a pebble, turning it over in his palm, then swung his arm
back and threw the little stone over a small sand dune. He heard it plunk into
a puddle with an eerie echo, and when he turned to face her again, the edges of
his face were outlined in light shadows and he was smiling confidently.
Shrugging,
he ignored the thumping in his chest as he watched the smile flicker on her
face like a freshly lit candle. "I have an excellent memory, Kagome-sama. It comes from my
vigorous training," he grinned, nudging her lightly. "And my special tea."
Kagome
beamed sweetly, tugging at his sleeve and making him stop to look at her.
"Really? What did you have for breakfast?"
Uh...
"Eight
second rule, Miroku-sama," she giggled as his eyebrows quirked upwards,
and ran on ahead, leaving him standing in the middle of the dusty trail with a
positively nonplussed expression clouding his tanned features.
Flustered,
Miroku frowned. What the hell was this eight second rule?
And as
he lazily advanced on her, deliberately making a mental note to ask about this
infantile rule later, he wondered what in Buddha's name he had for breakfast.
'I've
always been more of a solitary man, preferring to work on my own, than in the
company of others.'
'Yeah,
but if we don't work fast, you won't even have your own company to enjoy.'
'Dear
Kagome-sama, are you troubled by this wretched fate of mine?'
'Who
should I help out? Miroku-sama's a lot nicer than Inuyasha...'
'Y-you
wouldn't dare betray me!'
Oops,
wrong memory. Grimacing, he shook his head, pushing the thought away
unceremoniously. Damn it, what did he have for breakfast?
"Houshi-sama?"
Miroku looked
up. He'd caught up to the group without even realizing it. Inuyasha was eyeing
him oddly, frowning distrustfully; Kagome was chatting with Shippou, glancing
surreptitiously at Inuyasha, and Sango-
Sango
was standing in front of him, a mixture of concern and suspicion staining her
lovely features.
"I'm
okay," he said absentmindedly, looking past her shoulder to the small
valley below. "My. That village certainly seems as if it's enjoying
an opulent lifestyle," he pointed casually, feigning indifference while
his brain schemed furtively. "How truly unfortunate that such ominous clouds are gathering
over it!"
Sango
gave an exasperated sigh, while Inuyasha snorted derisively.
"Oh!"
exclaimed Kagome happily. "I won't have to sleep on the ground again! Yay!"
Miroku
tilted his head.
Huh.
Kagome
was the only one that never complained about his... less virtuous endeavors. In
fact, most of the time, she was downright ecstatic about them. He couldn't
recall a single instance when she'd chastised him for anything other than his,
uh, roaming hands. Which, he noted with no small amount of astonishment, she
hadn't really protested lately.
Huh.
Forcing
himself to look away, he descended the hill, enjoying the amicable silence. The
village nestled within the valley spread below them like a dark, frozen river,
resembling a sown playground of dying candles.
Unfortunately,
the farmers on the outskirts of the village seemed a little too... enthusiastic
to see them, even at this late hour. Most of them had turned their heads to
watch as the group passed by tiny rice fields, observing the outsiders with
sparkling eyes.
For a
moment, Miroku was certain he could almost recognize the familiar glint of-something in their welcoming smiles. Then,
assuring himself the... possibility was wholly ridiculous, he relaxed. This
village-this village was small and peaceful and-
"Welcome,
travelers!"
Miroku
turned, looked left, then right, then frowned in confusion, his eyes wide and
uncomprehending.
"Down
here," said a hoarse voice.
Miroku
glanced down, his eyebrows still high on his sun-touched forehead.
A short,
old man with countless wrinkles and craggy whiskers was smiling up at them,
waving his ratty cane. "Welcome! Can I interest you in a reading?"
Miroku
blinked and exchanged glances with Inuyasha. The old man didn't seem dangerous, but what was he-
"What
the hell are you talking about, old man?" asked Inuyasha rudely, his hand
resting on the hilt of his sword.
The old
man in question offered them a strained smile, though his eyes spoke of deep
exasperation.
"The
future!" he clarified loudly. "Do you want me to read your
future?"
Miroku
shook his head, muttering under his breath. He'd been right. He knew there had to be
a reason for the village's obvious wealth in these times of hardship. Perhaps
procuring tonight's lodging would be a much more difficult task than he had
previously anticipated.
It was
clearly time to turn around, that it was.
"Oh!"
Kagome squealed happily. "A fortune teller! Ooh! Let's do it! It'll be
fun!"
Miroku
flinched. He'd planned on leaning closer to her and whispering the truth, but
Inuyasha beat him to it. Except, minus the whispering.
"Keh.
Idiot! He's trying to swindle us, you stupid-"
"I'd
like to try it," said Sango quietly.
All eyes
turned to her.
Her lips
were thinning into a tenuous line, her eyes softening with unshed tears.
One
simple word etched itself across Miroku's mind.
Kohaku.
"For
a nominal fee, I assume?" he asked suddenly, staring the old man down with
a determined scowl.
The old
man nodded vehemently. "Of course."
"Fine,"
replied Miroku, glancing at Sango. Something, some emotion beyond description,
unfolded across her face.
He
wasn't sure he wanted to know the future, but if Sango did, then...
The old
man looked pleased as he ushered the small group into his ornate shack. A
frumpy old woman sat there, looking bored. She jumped to her feet quickly when
she spotted them, going about making tea and bowing excessively.
"So,
how will you do it?" asked Kagome enthusiastically, practically bouncing
from one foot to the other as an equally excited Shippou clung to her leg.
"Crystal ball, coffee grinds, Tarot cards, ooh-palms?"
The old
man blinked warily, his withered hands freezing midair.
"I
prefer fortune cookies because they're open to interpretation," she
continued happily while the rest of the shack stared at her. "Except,
sometimes, they're kinda... useless and make no sense whatsoever," she
scrunched up her little nose thoughtfully. "But they taste good, so that's
a plus."
Silence.
"Um...
that is to say-hey, is that tea?"
Miroku
tried very hard to hide his grin, then sat down on the offered mat. Sango sat
to his left, while Kagome plopped down to his right, Shippou in her lap.
"Kagome,"
whispered Shippou, awed, "will you bring me some of those cookies next
time?"
Flushed,
Kagome nodded, ruffling the little kitsune's hair.
Inuyasha
scoffed from where he was skulking in a dark corner, and Miroku looked at the
old man. "So, tea leaves?"
The old
man looked indignant. "Not just any tea leaves! My tea leaves. I've been growing them for
years. It's a gift."
Doubtfully,
Miroku raised a bushy eyebrow, thoroughly prepared to voice his disapproval,
but Sango was sitting there, deadly serious, so he bit his tongue and
reluctantly permitted the old man to moan and groan and pretend as if he
actually knew what he was doing.
Without
having to confer, Kagome, Shippou, and Miroku allowed Sango to go first. She
was lightly flushed-most likely embarrassed to have all of them there for
something she considered reasonably private-and concentrating on what the old
man was telling her.
"Oh,
I see apples in your future," said the old man with too much feigned
mysticism. Miroku's jaw clenched imperceptibly.
"Uh...
apples?" asked Sango, raising an incredulous eyebrow.
"Apples
mean you're going to have a long life," nodded the old man appreciatively.
"Good. You deserve it."
Miroku
sat up straighter.
"And
there's a basket," continued the old man with a mischievous grin. "An
addition to the family, I'm convinced," he said, casting her a warm smile.
Sango
blushed profusely, while Kagome giggled. Miroku cleared his throat with an
audacious smirk. Hmm. Perhaps that child he kept asking for-
"And...
he's going to be all right soon," said the old man unexpectedly.
Miroku's
head snapped up.
"What?"
Sango mumbled, trembling.
"Hmm?"
"Who's
going to be all right?" she demanded, clenching her fist.
The old
man blinked innocently. "What?"
Sango
gritted her teeth. "You said-you said he was going to be all right. Who's he?" she asked
desperately.
"Did
I really? Did I say that?" the old man looked about the room, confused.
"I don't remember."
Sango
growled in frustration, then averted her eyes to Kagome. "I'm going to
wait outside. Yell if you need a boomerang. Or poison. Or an extra set of
hands."
The old
man shrunk back on his mat, his whiskers twitching.
Sango
slowly got up, squared her shoulders, nodded angrily at a disturbingly silent
Inuyasha, then marched outside, fuming.
Miroku
scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. He was going to follow her out, he was, but-
"And
you," the old man pointed a wobbly finger at Kagome's lap. "You with
the tail. There's a night bird in your leaves."
Shippou
blinked his little green eyes, looking up at a flustered Kagome for an
explanation. Kagome bit her lip.
"It
is an evil omen,"
said the old man in a haunted tone. Shippou squeaked, blinking anxiously.
"Wha-what
kind of evil omen?" he whimpered, clutching desperately to Kagome's red
necktie.
"Sickness,
poverty, disgrace!" said the old man gravely, though Miroku could have sworn he'd seen his wrinkled cheeks stretch
into an amusingly malicious grin.
"Kagome!"
wailed Shippou, snuggling into her chest, seeking protection.
"Oh,
um," yelped Kagome, trying to comfort the little kitsune. "That's...
that's not true." Pause. "Is it?"
The old
man shrugged noncommittally. "There's also an arrow. I can't really
tell."
"What
does that mean?" cried Shippou, wiping his
eyes with a shaky paw.
Kagome
opened her mouth-
"It
means someone's going to shoot you with one, stupid runt!" grumbled
Inuyasha from his corner.
Shippou
wailed loudly, then bolted outside.
Kagome
looked at her empty lap, then Miroku, then Inuyasha.
"Sit!"
she said angrily.
Inuyasha
kissed the floor, breaking the low table and scattering the damp leaves around.
"Bitch!"
"My,"
said the old man, seemingly unconcerned with his wrecked household furnishings.
"There's a wheel on that one. Did he inherit something recently?"
Inuyasha
snorted, trying to get up.
"Actually-"
began Kagome, but the old man raised a hand to silence her.
"And
wood. Did he pledge himself in marriage?"
Kagome
froze.
Miroku
watched her intently.
"FEH!
I've had enough of this shit. Kagome, let's go."
Kagome
looked at the ground, furrowing her eyebrows contemplatively.
"Tch.
Fine. Idiot."
And just
like that, the hanyou was gone, escaping through the stringy flap that shielded
the door. Dazed, Miroku narrowed his eyes at the old man. Was he methodically
trying to get rid of everyone else?
Oi. What
a ridiculous notion.
Bemused,
Miroku addressed the old man, who was smiling oddly at the ground. "I
apologize for the dama-"
The old
man ignored him, picking through the leaves. "Head covering," he
mumbled. He turned to Kagome. "Success in life."
Kagome
tilted her head, putting a finger to her chin. "That's what a hat means?" Pause.
"Are there little squares and triangles on it? Because I kinda have to
pass Geometry."
The old
man blinked. Miroku followed.
"Gah,
Inuyasha's right. I guess this really was a waste of time. The only time people
get answers to really important questions is in manga,"
she said, wrinkling her nose. "Or Escaflowne."
Slowly,
she rose, and, throwing a questioning glance over her shoulder at Miroku, she
exited, her fingers lingering on the flap before she pushed it aside with a
soft sigh.
Miroku
tapped his fingers on his knees with a blank stare.
Does
that mean I have to pay for all this?
With a
scowl, he turned to the old man, intent on weaseling out of such an unfair
predicament.
"You're
going to have to wait a long time," the old man told him seriously,
interrupting his unrehearsed speech.
Eh?
"For...?"
asked Miroku bewilderedly.
"Heh,"
was all the old man said, thrusting his wrinkled hand out, expecting payment.
Begrudgingly,
Miroku paid him, promising himself reimbursement once he cornered Inuyasha.
When he
was almost out of the shack, his hand froze midair at the sound of the old
man's grating voice.
"When
the sun sets next, you better lay low, monk."
Miroku
grinned. "I intend to," he said and was gone.
Once
outside, he easily spotted the rest of his companions resting against a well in
the center of the village. The moonlight dimmed for a while, as if the moon had
passed under a great deal of heavy clouds, and for a moment, Miroku felt
lightheaded and lost.
Promptly,
he shrugged the feeling off, approaching the well and arranging his face into a
cheerful expression.
Sango
was standing stiffly, leaning against the well with her arms crossed, waiting
for the vacationing Kirara to return. Shippou was clinging to Kagome, Kagome
was watching Sango, and Inuyasha-
Inuyasha
was staring off into the horizon.
Thinking
about Kikyou?
With a
determined stride (why did he feel angry all of a sudden?), Miroku closed the
distance, and opened his mouth to smooth things over. But nothing came out. The
darkness echoed back in silence as he padded across the gravelly ground,
listening to Kagome's soft humming.
She
glanced up at him as he sat next to her on the well's blocky brim.
"This
whole village is full of swindlers," she muttered, swinging her legs with
a pout.
"I told you," snarled Inuyasha
halfheartedly, barely looking up from his sulky crouch.
"In
the ten minutes I waited for you, I was ambushed by three beggars-who, by the
way, looked wealthier than all of us put together-and a monk who claimed he
could provide me with supreme enlightenment... for a modest price,"
grunted Sango accusingly.
"Wow,
Miroku, you'd sure fit in here, huh?" said Shippou innocently.
Miroku's
lips curled.
"So
much for not sleeping on the ground tonight, eh?" sighed Kagome softly.
Then, instantly, she perked up. "Oh!"
"What?"
Kagome
fidgeted. "Um, Inuyasha... would-it-be-okay if-I-went-home-now?"
Inuyasha
twitched.
"It's
just... uh, well, tomorrow's Monday, and I... I have school."
Inuyasha
twitched twice.
"And,
I know we haven't found any shards this time, but my exam in Chemi-no! Um.
Geometry. My exam in Geometry is very important."
Miroku
tilted his head, inspecting her studiously.
Her eyes
were averted, her fingers twisting nervously, and one bare knee was slightly
bent. She looked sheepish and shy and-
She was
lying!
Miroku
blinked incredulously. He didn't know how he knew, but she. Was. Lying.
He
paused. She'd been going home frequently as of late. And she stayed away
longer. And she seemed distant. And guilty. He'd attributed it to the whole
Kikyou thing, but now...
Now, he
wondered.
"Kagome-sama,"
he ventured slyly, "I thought you had this... Geometry exam last
week."
Kagome
blushed peculiarly.
Uh huh.
She was definitely lying. Why?
"Yes,
but, um..." she fiddled with her kimono. "I have to retake it,
because..." here she looked at him, and for a moment, Miroku had the
strangest feeling she was accusing him of something. "I just have to
retake it, okay?"
Feeling
inexplicably odd, Miroku prodded further. "But, Kagome-sama, you didn't
bring any books with you this time. You couldn't possibly be sufficiently prepared."
He had
her now.
"I-you-sit!"
Inuyasha
did.
"Oh!"
Sango
giggled. Shippou snickered. Miroku grinned. Kagome stomped away furiously, her
face alternating from a horrified pale to a flushed pink.
With an
amused shake of his head, Miroku calmly addressed a grinning Sango. "I'm
going to go make sure she reaches the well safely. If Kirara returns, could you
ask her to come get us? It'll be faster that way."
Sango
nodded, frowning gently. "Kagome-chan's been gone a lot lately, hasn't
she?"
Miroku
said nothing.
"It's
that stupid dog's fault!" pouted Shippou, tapping his paws irately.
Inuyasha finally picked himself up, but steadfastly ignored the little kitsune.
Not even
a Feh? Hmm.
"Indirectly,
yes," agreed Miroku, observing the hanyou. "But..."
But
there's something else.
"Just
go get her before she trips on a bug and ends up dead," grunted Inuyasha
sulkily.
Miroku
exchanged wary glances with Sango, then set off.
It
didn't take him long to find Kagome.
In fact,
it took him longer to stop laughing.
She was
sitting on the grassy ground, nursing a bug bite with a petulant expression
marring her usually cheery features.
"Got
lost?" he asked, his shoulders shaking with repressed laughter.
She
refused to look at him.
"What
bit you?"
Silence.
"Kagome-sama...
are you upset with me?"
Nothing.
"Kagome-sama,
are you?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"I
don't know."
Miroku
pinched the bridge of his nose, then sat down beside her. She's not upset with me, he had
to remind himself. She's upset
with Inuyasha.
Right?
"I
wish I'd remembered to bring at least one pocky. I could really use it about
now," she muttered, rubbing her ankle.
It was a
pretty ankle.
Uhm.
"Pocky?"
he questioned curiously.
Kagome
sniffled. "A strawberry one. A giant strawberry pocky."
Miroku
wrinkled his nose. "That sounds... delicious," he lied.
Kagome
glared at him. "Oh, shut up. You love them more than I do."
What?
"Kagome-sama?"
he blinked. He'd never had a giant strawberry... thing. He didn't think he'd
everwant to have a giant
strawberry thing.
Her eyes
widened. "Oh! Um! No-forget I said that."
He
wanted to. But-
"Kagome-sama,"
he said as softly as he could, but she stood up abruptly, offering him quite a
view.
Unh.
"I-uhm.
I'm going home," she pointed to a distant thicket, flustered.
"Very
well," he grinned cheerfully. "But you might want to-" here, he
stood up and lightly grasped her hand, pointing it in the opposite direction,
"-go that way."
Kagome
went brick red, stammered out a 'Um, yes, thanks', then extracted her hand from
his.
He
watched her ascend the path, which was thick with foliage and slick with dew
and-
She
slipped.
"Miroku-sama..."
she whimpered miserably.
Biting
his lip to keep from laughing, he climbed after her, feeling the ground beneath
him shift, scalding the earth to make way for his footprints. The moon started
its slow descent, looking for all the world like water, its lakes glistening
softly in the darkness.
He was
reluctant, but-but he'd offer her a shoulder to cry on. He had to. He opened
his mouth to tell her that it was all right to let it all out, to scream and
cry and-
"You've
never heard of the Grandfather Paradox, have you?" she asked suddenly,
sniffling.
What? Wasn't this about Inuyasha? He was certain it had to be. Had to be. Kagome didn't
think about anything or anyone else. She didn't.
"Of
course you haven't," she mumbled to herself, climbing to her feet and
brushing herself off. "Stupid question. I'm sorry."
"I
haven't heard of it, Kagome-sama," he began uncertainly, stepping closer
and helping her up the slippery path. "But perhaps if you explained-"
Her gaze
rested on his face. She seemed to be contemplating it for a moment, looking as
if she'd burst with some great secret any moment now.
"Gah!
Okay!" she said finally, surrendering to whatever impulse drove her to ask
him such a strange question in the first place.
Patiently,
Miroku waited as they climbed toward the darkened horizon. Then, he waited some
more.
"Kagome-sama?"
She
seemed to be searching for words. "Um, well," she began
inarticulately. Her foot slipped a little, so, instinctively, she grabbed onto
his arm for support. Except-except she didn't let go even after they were on
level ground.
In fact,
she looked quite comfortable resting her hand on his arm.
Unh.
"Okay,
apparently, this is how it works," she told him confidentially. "Say
you went back in time about fifty years."
"Mh
hmm."
"And
say you met a young man, and accidentally, um... killed him."
"Why
would I want to-"
"I
said accidentally,
Miroku-sama."
Miroku
grinned brilliantly.
"So, anyway," said Kagome,
poking his forearm with a side glance. "By doing that, you changed the
past and your interference had terrible consequences, especially if that young
man turned out to be your grandfather."
Miroku's
head swam. The moon threatened to fade away with the coming flashes of early
morning light. He listened to her voice, the sound tapering off like rain
against thin metal.
She
cleared her throat, and continued ambiguously, "So, if you killed your
grandfather, he wouldn't have children, and those children wouldn't have
you."
Miroku
was silent for a minute. "So, what you're saying is, killing your family
is dangerous."
Kagome
blanched. "That-that's not what-I..." Her features softened
ominously. "Miroku-sama. Don't you ever wonder if it's-wrong for me to be
here?"
Miroku
stared at her.
Stupid
Inuyasha.
He was
going to kill him.
"No,"
he said resolutely. "I don't. And neither should you."
Kagome
looked at him in surprise, then relaxed and smiled happily.
Was that
it? Was she worried she didn't belong here? Why wouldn't she-
Her
fingers brushed against his skin, and suddenly, there was a breeze so abrupt
and gentle it seemed to be seeping through the clouds. It sounded as though
someone had sighed, somewhere off in the distance, as if a long bout of crying
had finally ended.
Hn. She didn't belong here.
He
couldn't even imagine what her world was like, what the future entailed, but...
it was comforting to know that there was a future. As long as Kagome belonged
in her time, he'd be able to cling to this
selfish feeling of security.
But-
"What
was your grandfather like?"
"What?"
he raised both eyebrows, his frown deepening. It wasn't exactly a non sequitur,
considering their preceding conversation, but-
"He
was a good man. I think. I never met him."
No
one-no one had ever asked him that question. Hell, not many people asked him
personal questions, period.
So, it was no surprise Miroku found himself at a loss for words.
"And
your father?" she asked softly, kicking leisurely at a small pebble.
Huh.
Miroku glanced at her, wondering why she looked so comfortable leaning against
him, with their arms entwined so snugly. What baffled him even more was-was
that it felt so natural.
"He
was funny. I remember that," he mumbled, a warm emotion spreading through
his chest. "He used to tell me stories about-uhm, his..."
To his
chagrin, Miroku flushed.
"His
many conquests?" Kagome giggled innocently.
"Remarkable
intuition," he smirked, pointing his staff north. "Actually, he
always said no one was as difficult to, erm, conquer as my mother. She used to
be a priestess-" Ruefully, he looked down at Kagome, who was watching the
ground intently.
Definitely
time to change the topic.
"Kagome-sama,"
he cleared his throat. "I'm not exactly positive, but..." he frowned.
"I don't think you-or anyone, for that matter-can affect the future in a
way that isn't already preordained."
Her nose
scrunched up. "Wh-what do you mean?"
Miroku
paused thoughtfully, then clutched his staff tightly as he knelt to the ground.
"This Grandfather Paradox you spoke of-" he said, drawing a circle in
the dirt. "It doesn't make sense."
Kagome
eyed him skeptically. "Miroku-sama, with all due respect, I don't think
you can debunk 20th century scien-"
"I'm
not saying it's wrong,"
he mumbled, concentrating. Lightly, he marked a spot on the circle. "Let's
use your example."
Kagome
watched, fascinated.
Briefly,
Miroku was completely distracted, surprised to be the recipient of so much of
her attention.
"This
is you," he glanced at her purposefully, scribbling her kanji into the
dry, grainy dirt. "If you went back in time to kill your
grandfather-"
"I
wouldn't-" she huffed indignantly.
Miroku
grinned, amused. "-and assuming you succeeded in killing him, most likely
with a stray arrow aimed at someone else-"
"Gh-I-Mir-"
Miroku
bit back a chuckle. "You would never be born, therefore changing the
future, right?"
Kagome
nodded, a tiny superior smirk threatening to cloud her expression, as if to
say, 'See, I'm right and you're wrong and I'm going to rub it in now with my
giant strawberry pocky.'
Cleverly,
Miroku looked up and braced his palms against the lopsided illustration,
leaving his staff on the ground. "But Kagome-sama-" he murmured and
watched, surprised, as her gaze slowly dropped to his lips.
Huh.
This-this was new.
Her
hands were tucked safely under her sleeves, the tips of her fingers poking out
childishly as she blushed and knelt next to him to observe his sketch. Miroku
fought the urge to close his eyes, hearing nothing but the breeze as it
caressed the back of his neck, and his own steady heartbeat.
Swallowing,
he pushed off the ground as the howling in the distance grew louder. "-if
you'd never been born, how could you have gone back into the past to kill your
grandfather?"
He
watched, strangely satisfied, as her eyes widened and her lips parted, fingers
clutching the hem of her little kimono, pushing it down against the wind.
"Oh,"
was all she said, and Miroku enjoyed the bewildered pout dancing across her
features. Then, to his complete astonishment, she balled up her little fists,
her knuckles turning white.
"I'm
going to kill him!" she growled irritably,
jumping to her feet. "I'm going to-I'm going to... well, I don't know what
I'm going to do, but it's going to hurt!"
Miroku
coughed uncomfortably. Kill him? Him, who?
"He lied to me!" she narrowed her eyes,
then spun on her heel.
The next
thing Miroku knew, her slender finger was poking his chest as she rambled, a
slight trace of fury edging her voice. "Jerk!"
Oddly,
Miroku felt as though she'd been referring to him, but that-that was
impossible. He hadn't done anything. And he certainly never lied to her.
Fortunately,
he was rescued within a moment.
With a
throaty growl, Kirara, her paws blazing in the darkening sky, touched ground
beside them.
"Kirara,
am I glad to see you!" said Kagome, her anger washing away
instantaneously. Kirara mewled and nuzzled Kagome's hand in greeting.
"Could you please take me to the well? I'm sorry to be such a bother,
but-"
Obediently,
Kirara sat down, offering her back to Kagome. Gratefully, Kagome mounted the
demon as Miroku watched with a contrite scowl.
Kagome
certainly seemed in a hurry to get home. She was full to bursting with some
unidentifiable energy, and-
What was
so entertaining about her time now that wasn't before?
Oh.
'I'm
going to kill him.'
Him.
Briefly,
Miroku wondered at the fleeting twinge of jealousy (where did that come from?) spreading its cold fingers
through his flesh, but immediately shrugged it away.
Ridiculous. He was
being ridiculous.
Hesitantly,
he watched as Kirara and Kagome became nothing but tiny specks on the darkening
horizon, then calmly collected his staff, and headed back toward the village.
Once
again, it was none of his business. None. Of. His. Business.
Rubbing
his chin in thought, Miroku grinned wickedly.
Besides.
There was a basket in Sango's tea leaves.