Chapter Two

*************

Kaoru sat on the porch again watching Kenshin work. ‘This was starting to become a bad habit,’ she thought. She sighed and wondered if Kenshin still acting the same after so many years was a good thing or a bad thing. Would he always be the same: good, kind, sweet etc. but also distant, detached and clueless. She thought things would change after she came from Enishi’s island. She’d thought Kenshin would come around, that they'd get married and have a family. All those things but no, everything had remained the same. She was 20 now and though she would wait for him forever, she rather he come around now then later. So she could enjoy her time with him.

She sighed again and this time Kenshin turned around. "Are you alright Kaoru-dono?"

Her head snapped back to him. "Yes, yes everything is fine. I think that I just need to go for a walk."

"Would you like sessha to go with you, I'm almost done with the laundry", he said as he stared to stand. "NO, no that's alright you stay and finish. I'll be ok. Don't worry I'll be back before lunch", with that she sped off.

"Hmm", and with that the rurouni went back to his laundry though not with the same enthusiasm. She had been sighing a lot lately. He couldn't figure out what could be wrong with her. Was it the anniversary to something, he couldn't remember. Maybe he could ask Tae-dono. Yes she would know and she liked him so she would help him and them he could fix whatever was bothering Kaoru-dono. With those thoughts he finished up the laundry and headed off to the kitchen to make lunch.

This spot held so many memories for them. Whenever she took a walk this is where she would always end up. The place where he said good by and where she welcomed him back. Thinking about him leaving always brought tears to her eyes. March 15 was always the worst day because it marked the anniversary to his departure that first year. He always made sure he had nothing to do on that day every year she knew. He would spend all day with her. But why she was never sure. Was it guilt, kindness or love that made him comfort her on that day. If it was love, then was the guilt keeping him from moving on. That was the current theory. Seeing as to how he blamed himself for everything. She knew the hitokiri wouldn't blame himself but to get that one part to convince the other seemed really hard as well as unlikely. He'd been this way for what she assumed to be a more than 10yrs. And so far the hitokiri hadn't been able to convince the rurouni as to where the blame lay and how to deal with it. She often wondered if things would have been different if she had met the hitokiri and not the rurouni. "Hmm, I can always try to hit him really hard maybe he'll forget he's the rurouni and become the hitokiri. Though I don't know how much better off and improvement that'll be."

Her thoughts drifted back to last nights dream. It was always some variation of the first. She’d been trying to get away when he caught up to her. He’d corner her and she’d become helpless. Unable and unwilling to fight him off. The idea of hitting the rurouni over the head was truly enticing if he acted like the battoussai in her dreams. Closing her eyes she rested against a tree and became lost in one of her fantasies.

"Kaoru dono, sessha was about to go look for you."

"I'm sorry Kenshin I lost track of time but I ran home as fast as I could. Is everyone eating already." she said as she side stepped him and walked into her house. "iie, it's just us till tomorrow. Yahiko went fishing with Sano. He left a little while ago." He responded as he followed her in. He noted she seemed happier, but said nothing to point it out. Lunch was eaten in a comfortable silence. The only noise that disturbed the meal was Kaoru knocking over the tea. "Sorry.” She said awkwardly. He smiled at her and set a small towel on it. “It’s fine Kaoru-dono. Sessha will take care of it.”

*************

She scrubbed and she washed every part of her self. She rinsed her hair and then began to dry her self off. She had spent longer than usual in her bath, but she wanted to look nice tonight. She hardly ever got a chance to have dinner with him alone. She wondered why Kenshin was so stubborn. She put on her robe and then made her way out of the bathhouse, heading for her room. She looked around for something nice to wear without showing she put too much effort into it. She decided on a forest green kimono with a burgundy Obi that had sakura flowers imprinted all throughout the material. She tipped her pinky into her new bottle of perfume and dabbed some behind her ears and bit on the back of her neck. She wiped the rest on her wrists and headed out of the room. The girl had said it was strong but the perfume smelled just like her other one. The smell wasn’t any stronger. Giving it no more though, she stepped out to find Kenshin. Maybe he’d let her help him with dinner. “If only Yahiko would stay away for longer than a day. Maybe I could convince him. I think that could work.” she thought as she walked down the hall.

"What could work?"

She was startled by him, it seems she had wondered right into the kitchen. "Kenshin, uhm... just some trick I was planning on playing on Yahiko." she couldn't meet his eyes, so she looked down but then her eyes were on his chest, she blushed and looked away before she embarrassed her self any further. 'He was amused by her reactions to him sometimes and wondered if it was just him she reacted to in this way or to all males.' Hmm, those thoughts unnerved him. Better to avoid those kinds of thoughts all together. But still he wondered, she hadn't had much contact with anyone (male) since he met her. There was Sano but she didn't act the same way around him. She treated Sano more the way she treated Yahiko. Hmm. What was wrong with him today? Maybe he should try and get more than three hours rest.

"Ano, Kenshin." she was speaking and he'd been staring. He took a step back in hopes of regaining some composure. "Hai Kaoru-dono"

"You're not listening. I said why don't you go and take a bath.” She was blushing again. He nodded and left. Sometimes been around her was just a bit too much for him to bear. 'She's too innocent,' the thought was something he always repeated to himself. But every year that passed was becoming just a bit harder than the last because every year she became more beautiful. 'I wonder if that thought will still keep me in line in 2yrs.' Again, it's better to just not think about it at all and with that he submerged himself completely in the cold water.

Dinner was interesting. Kenshin came back into the room just as the soup he’d left on the fire came to a boil. She’d occupied herself with making rice balls when he stepped into the kitchen. She turned a bit surprised to see him come so close to her. He peered over her shoulder to look at her rice balls when he caught a whiff of her. The same smell as before. He felt something in him snap and he took a step back. But to his horror the step took him forward instead.

“Kenshin,” she said a little uncertainly.

He blinked back trying to regain control when he found he couldn’t he turned his back to her and began stirring the soup. It was easier when he didn’t see her but he could still smell her.

“Kaoru . . . dono. Why don’t you go and set the table.” It was hard but he strived for the rurouni innocence to come across his tone.

She stared at his back for a moment not sure what had just happened. “All right,” she said going into the dinning room and setting things up.

He breathed easier when she was gone. His mind cleared and he was able to think. His grip loosened on the wooden spoon and he looked around for the bowls. His control had snapped, almost completely. He didn’t understand why? But it had been like when he’d fought Saitou. His heart had quickened his senses had sharpened and he’d spotted his prey. He took several deep breaths before he went out with the bowls of soup. Still acting like his rurouni self he went out to the dining hall and sat down next to her for a total of five minutes before he excused himself. He’d said he’d felt tire and so he’d gone off to bed. He’d made his excuses fast as he could before she had a chance to speak. Tomorrow he would have to master more control over his emotions or he’d have to leave for a good part of the day.

Kaoru only stared at the spot he’d been in confusion. He’d acted odd. Really odd. She finished her meal slowly, if not dejectedly. She’d even dressed nice for him but he hadn’t noticed. She took the plates to the water basin and washed them out. Maybe tomorrow . . . She wiped her hands on a small towel he kept near by and went to back to her room.

She lay back on her futon, looking at the ceiling she wondered if she should take some new approach to gaining Kenshin attention. She’d come to the end of the line. She was getting older and soon she’d be too old to have children. It wasn’t the first time she’d had the thought but now she was starting to feel desperate. She thought back to what Tae had said about two years back after the ring incident. ‘Maybe you should try and seduce him.’ Easy for her to say. Kaoru had no idea how to go about it. Not to mention if it didn’t work, she’d make a fool of herself for no reason what so ever. ‘still the idea was there. Her eyes began to feel heavy with sleep. If only he’d make the first move she thought as she drifted into the blackness.

Kaoru opened her eyes and so much disappointment filled her, she almost cried. The sun hadn’t even come up yet. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried with every fiber of her being to return to the dream.