Show it comes from: Cupid

Title: Trust.

Author: Adalisa

Feedback: If it wasn't for it, fics wouldn't be posted, and the fandom would be a very boring place.

Distribution: My site, anyone else, just ask.

Summary: Trevor's thoughts about first loves, chances missed and friendships' lost.

Rating: Between Pg-13 and G

Disclaimer: Trevor, Champ and all Cupid characters were created by Rob Thomas, who is a genius, and belong to TriStar Pictures, Sony and to the guys of ABC who didn't knew what they had and let die a wonderful series. So while someone else takes them, I play a little with them.

Content: Champ/Trevor

Warning: This has m/m. You should know that already, since you found this. It should not be a warning, since it's just thought, no action, but well...

Spoilers: First Loves

Notes: This is a mirror to The Eyes of Love

By Adalisa.

Love cannot live without trust.

I told Psyche that a long, long time ago. And now, Claire rubbed it in my face.

I think I'll never forget that little fact ever again, not after last week.

When I found out not only that I don't trust Claire, but that I never will. I will always expect her to have a hidden card, an Ace on the Sleeve.

And she has, even if it is not always a bad thing.

Why I am telling you this? Well... first of all, I'm bored today. And I have to talk to someone about this, and I can't go and talk to Champ.

No. In this little matter, the mortal who has become my best friend is off limits.

So, the only one who can listen to my rant is you, and you're going to listen. Serves you right for throwing me out of home.

I realized all this two days ago, at Taggerty's. Good place to hang, even when you're not an exiled god, if you ask me. And it's a good place to do my job too, as I can both work as a mortal, and try to make some good points.

Also, I get to see Champ relax. And I hadn't noticed how much I like to see him relaxed. Gotta talk to Uncle Morpheus about giving my friend a couple of restful nights.

Yeah. My friend. Now I can say it without any problem.

But I'm straying away. I was talking about two nights ago. Champ introduced me and Claire to one of his oldest and best friends, a good singer called Sheila Gill. Nice girl, and she looked single, so I began to make plans on how to find her other half.

Away from Champ. She really didn't strike me as the kind of girl for him.

Then she talked to us about this great lost love she had. A kid that she had loved when she was a kid, and she had never forgot. A guy that loved her too, and that she had never seen again ever since moving away from her childhood home. At 14.

Now, how could I resist such sweet bait?

So we had to go and find her. We meaning she and I, not she, Champ, and Claire, who joined the merry group much to my shock.

Claire was actually interested in helping. That came out of the left filed, no doubts about it.

That thrilled me. For a moment I believed that she had finally seen that I was telling her the truth, that all her attempts to find 'the real Trevor' were useless because I have never been mortal. That if she could just help me a little, I could finish my mission and go away before it was too late.

No. I'm not going to tell you too late for what. You're the King of Gods, you figure it out.

Now, the trip itself wasn't that bad. In fact, it was quite fun. Except for the part when I caught Claire tapping some observations about myself on her recorder.

She was saying that my so called psychosis was getting worse, instead of receding. That I was pushing, not accomplishing anything, and even worse, that she was thinking on putting me on medication.

Get me back to the hospital, and take some stupid pills that are the equivalent of a chemical lobotomy.

As you can imagine, I was deeply wounded.

So, I lost it.

Before the stop when I heard Claire's real reason to come with us, Sheila had been telling us the story of Lister, her first love. Something about it was nagging at the back of my mind, but omnipotence is not what it used to be.

My memory is failing me for some things, and I know you have something to do with it.

Anyway, then Claire told us the story of her first kiss, and I found out why she simply can't even think of fantasying a little. She just got burnt once, and decided never to try it again.

Just because a kid went from smooching to serious tongue action in just one afternoon.

The thing was that, after hearing her talking to the tape, I began to snap at her. I hated her in that brief moment, and wanted her to feel as bad as I did in that moment. I was cynical, and biting, and sarcastic, and showing why you don't mess with an angry god of love.

But then Champ began to told us the story of his first love and I snapped.

I don't know why I was so mean with him. Not even now, that I'm calm and trying to make sense of all that happened in the car. I just didn't want to hear Champ story.

Because I knew how it ended.

No. I don't exactly _remember_ that particular mortal romance. In fact, the more I try to think how many times I've tried to hook Champ up _before_ this punishment, I can't. I don't remember a single one of those attempts, no matter how much I try.

But it's a story of first loves.

And more than twenty two centuries of being in the job, have taught me that no first love ends happily ever after.

After that, after I saw his eyes, where just a brief, but very real hurt passed by, I eased down a little. Tried not to bite Champ or Sheila's head off. Claire, in the other hand, was still free game.

I simply can't get over the fact that I was trying to trust her, when she stabbed my back.

We found the house of Sheila's memories, and, after a brief struggle, I managed to convince her to get there and knock the door.

With Champ's help.

Champ, the one whom I had treated the worst when he tried to tell me the sad story of his first love.

Champ, who said that this trip was a bad idea from minute one.

Champ, who just then showed me that no matter what, he was my friend... and that as a friend, I could trust him.

I was thinking on that, on why in the name of all the Olympus couldn't I be the god of friendship, as it was obviously a job I did better than the love, when Sheila kissed the man of her dreams, just a few paces away from me.

I was wondering what had I done to deserve such trust from Champ, that he would trust me not to cause Sheila to be even more hurt, all while playing with a kid so he wouldn't distract Brian from Sheila.

Brian as in Lister's younger brother, who was the one who loved Sheila from the beginning.

I didn't learned about that until later, but it really doesn't matter. They hooked up, they're a couple, so now I only have 93 couples to go.

You can't deny that. I keep count very carefully.

I wasn't really paying much attention. I was still trying to make head or tails of Champ's actions.

I didn't like the way my thoughts were taking. Because Champ's trust... well, it went way farther away than simple friendship in my opinion.

Why would he choose me, whom he had only know for a month or so, over a girl who knew him for half his life?

Why would he stand my comments, my rude manners?

Why I trust him more than what I trusted Claire, more than what I'll ever trust her...

Love and trust go hand in hand...

And I know now that I'll never trust Claire.

To be continued...

Adalisa