War of the Worlds - Kama Sutra

War of the Worlds

Kama Sutra

By Kay De'Vil.

Title: Kama Sutra

Author: Kay De'Vil

Warnings: Insanity on my part, but what's new there right. :?)

Archive: Yes

Rating: PG.. MAYBE PG-13 (Humour) *I hope*

Disclaimer: Don't own them, just borrowing

Authors note: OK this was run up last night after a conversation in the RC Chat, it's not perfect but I've done my best.Here ya go Wesa and Marq, you asked for it so ya got it. Hope you like it.

Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me and I don't intend to make any money with them. There are no intentions to infringe the rights of the legal owners.

Kama Sutra

By Kay De'Vil.

Paul noticed Debi sneaking into the house, something clearly concealed beneath her jacket. His curiosity peeked he left the lounge and headed towards the back of the house where Debi's room was located.

As he approached Debi's room he heard soft gasps and muttering of "Is that possible?" and "No way.That's NOT possible!"

Raising an eyebrow he knocked on Debi's door, from inside he heard muttered cursing and Debi hurrying around the room clearly looking for a good hiding place for whatever it was she had that had evoked her comments.

Listening to her movements Paul easily tracked each section of the room she visited until she eventually called "Come... I mean enter"

Opening her bedroom door Paul entered slowly, his eyes scanning the room for her hiding place, a smile played across his face when he spotted the corner of a book sticking out from under the cushion of her chair.

Moving to sit on the chair in question he smiled to himself at the sound of Debi's gasp he knew damned well that she knew he knew she was up to something but he also knew that she wouldn't come out an admit it unless she had to.

Sitting down he looked at her for a moment before speaking "Well?"

"Well what?" she questioned positioning herself on the bed

"Are you going to tell me what you're up to or would you rather I guessed?" he questioned his hand slipping under his thigh to grasp the book

"I don't know what you mean Colonel" replied Debi smiling as sweetly and as innocently as a thirteen year old girl could.

Pulling the book out from under the cushion he looked at the cover and immediately turned bright red, coughing he looked from the book to Debi and back again "What are you doing with this" he coughed trying to clear the knot in his throat "young lady?"

"It's just a book Colonel" objected Debi standing and reaching for the book

"Kama Sutra is NOT just a book Debi" he stood placing the book behind his back as though the mere sight of the book would suddenly turn Debi into some sex crazed adolescent.

Sighing Debi folded her arms and looked at him with sad puppy dog eyes "Colonel, it's a library book I need to return it" she whined puppy dog eyes still in place

Standing ramrod straight Paul shook his head and marched towards the door "I 'll return it to the library the name is on it" he stated

"But Colonel"

"No buts Debi. I'm confiscating this. this book and that's all there is to it"

"Mom would let me read it!" she shouted as he left her room closing the door behind himself as he did so.

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Keeping the book concealed behind his back he passed the other members of the Blackwood project on his way to his office. He ignored Harrison's raised eyebrow and Norton's question of "What you got their Colonel" and headed straight into his office.

Removing his keys for his desk draw from his pants pocket he unlocked the top draw and dropped the book into it. Closing and re-locking the draw he took a moment to compose himself then headed back out to rejoin the others.

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For the rest of what was left of the day Ironhorse forgot about the book that was safely locked away in his desk draw, it was only when he returned to his office some hours later to complete the last of the daily reports he remembered it.

With his attention upon the report he was reading Paul paid little attention to what he was doing. Unlocking the top draw of his desk he reached inside, but instead of his fingers closing around the file he had expected to find sitting within his desk draw his fingers brushed over the leather bound book.

Setting down the file he had been reading he glanced at the book, his fingers automatically closing around the hard spine of the book and lifting it from his location.

Shooting a glance at the door to ensure no one was watching he settled back into his chair and began to idly flick through the pages hardly paying any attention to the pictures.

A large picture on one of the central pages caught his attention, sitting forward he held the book out at arms length for a second, squinting his eyes he shook his head and muttered "No way."

Turning the book to the left and tilting his head to the right he raised an eyebrow, then reversed his viewpoint turning the book to the right and his head to the left.

"That's just not physically possible" he muttered to himself as he once again altered the way he looked at the picture.

With his attention on the book Paul didn't notice the door to his office slowly opening and Suzanne stepping inside. Silently closing the door behind her she stood for a moment watching as Paul again and again titled the book, his head, squinted and raised his eyebrow.

"Paul?" she questioned softly

"WHAT!" exclaimed Paul startled by her appearance, the book flew from his hands when he jumped to his feet, his face turning several shades of pink.

He watched in horror as the book tumbled through the air to land hard on his desk then bounce off and fall at Suzanne's feet. Looking from the book to Suzanne his eyes widened before he looked towards the closed door in hopes of an avenue of escape.

He stood clued to the spot and watched as Suzanne slowly bent down to retrieve the book from the floor. Again he looked towards the door 'I can make it. I'll never live this down but I CAN MAKE IT' he thought to himself as he started to edge his way around the desk.

A smile played across Suzanne's face as she read the title of the book "Kama Sutra. Interesting choice in reading material Colonel" she commented as she flicked through the pages of the book.

"It. It's not mine!" he objected

"It's nothing to be ashamed of Colonel, you're a grown man" replied Suzanne as she too found an image that caught her interest

Unsure of what to say, Paul swallowed hard and stood rooted to the spot.

He smiled as he saw Suzanne blush slightly turning the book in the same fashion he had earlier.

"How the hell can any woman get her legs into THAT position?" demanded Suzanne thrusting the book towards Ironhorse

Moving to stand beside her Paul looked at the picture then at Suzanne "Now that's just not possible!" he stated shifting his perspective on the image.

Suzanne flicked through the pages again, stopping at another image before she exclaimed, "NO WAY, no man I've ever met has ever had one THAT BIG!" blushing she glanced at Paul

Paul shrugged refusing to pass any comment his eyes still locked upon the image. A smile played across his face as he glanced at Suzanne "Who invented Yoga?" he questioned

Suzanne grinned and shook her head then began to laugh "You think that's why Harrison does Yoga?" she questioned between fits of laughter

Ironhorse shuddered and gave Suzanne a cold glare "Thanks for the image" but his cold glare didn't last long as they both yet again burst into fits of laughter.

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The laughter coming from Ironhorse's office had caught Harrison's attention and now he was just dying to know what exactly was so funny in the Colonel's office.

Knocking he immediately opened the door and stepped inside. As he turned to see Paul and Suzanne he didn't miss the guilty expressions that crossed their faces or the fact that both where fighting back fits of laughter.

He could see something hidden behind Suzanne's back "What have you got their Suzanne?" he questioned

"Nothing" replied Suzanne glancing at Paul

"Suzanne you're hiding something behind your back, what is it?" Harrison glanced at Ironhorse but the Colonel's expression was now one of complete professionalism, he wasn't going to be of any help.

Suzanne gently elbowed Paul and slipped him the book before showing Harrison she had nothing in her hands "I haven't got anything Harrison"

"Of course you haven't you just gave it to the Colonel, now what the hell is it!" demanded Harrison growing frustrated. Turning to look at the Colonel he was almost certain he would be able to get an answer from the soldier "Colonel?"

"Yes Doctor?" questioned Paul in a cool calm tone

"What did Suzanne just hand you?"

"Nothing" replied Paul looking at Suzanne as he slipped the book back into her possession

"God damn it I want to know what's going on here!" exclaimed Harrison at the end of his temper.

Paul and Suzanne had to fight to hold their laughter in as both had just imagined Harrison stood stomping his feet like a child demanding to be let in on the secret.

Moving to usher Harrison from his office Paul placed his hand upon the astrophysicists shoulder "Harrison, are you feeling all right?" he questioned in a concerned tone "You don't look right" he added

"What, no I'm fine. I just want to know what's going on in here" stated Harrison resisting Paul's ushering

"Nothing Harrison, Suzanne and I where just going over the monthly requisitions"

"Requisitions don't usually have you both in fits of laughter!" objected Harrison as Paul guided him through the now open office door into the hallway

"I think you're coming down with something Harrison, you're clearly hearing things," he added

Stood in the doorway Harrison looked from Paul to Suzanne then sighed before placing his hand to his forehead "Yeah maybe your right. I think I'll take a nap"

"That's a good idea Harrison" agreed Suzanne

"Right, well OK. I'll see you later" still confused Harrison turned to head back to his office, paused and looked at them "You're sure you weren't just laughing?"

"Absolutely Harrison" replied Paul with a straight face. Stood in the doorway Suzanne and Paul watched as Harrison headed the short distance to his office and entered. It was only when Harrison closed the door behind himself they lost what little control they had.

Quickly closing the door Paul and leaned against it before bursting out into laughter. Suzanne made it to the chair in front of Paul's desk before she collapsed into it laughing and grasping her sides.

The End.

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