-A woman walks up to a house and rings the bell-
Sean: -opens the door- Umm... No thank you, we're quite happy with our vacuum...
Woman: Actually, my car broke down and I was wondering if I could use your telephone.
Sean: Oh... Okay.
-The woman enters and calls AAA. Unfortunately, they won't be there for a few hours...-
Woman: Well, they won't be here for a few hours. Would it be possible for me to wait here for them?
Sean: Sure... Just sign this. -Pulls out a piece of paper- It's a waiver saying that we are in no way responsible for any psychiatric damage that might occur during your stay.
Woman: Well... All right. -Signs the paper- My name is Mona. What's your name?
Sean: I'm Sean. And Rogue should be around here somewhere. -shouts- Hey Nibbles!
Rogue: -from somewhere in the house- WHAT?!
Sean: Get down here! We have company.
Mona: Oh...Rogue is your wife?
Sean: No... I haven't gone completely insane... yet.
Mona: Then your girlfriend.
Sean: Well... She's something all right.
Rogue: -comes in from the kitchen- Where's the can opener?
Sean: What do you want to open?
Rogue: Cat food.
Mona: Cat food?
Rogue: Yeah... Tuna. -to Sean- So, where's the can opener?
Sean: Why don't you use the electric can opener?
Mona: Tuna isn't cat food.
Rogue: Sure it is. Cats eat it, don't they? -back to Sean- I don't like the electric can opener.
Sean: It's faster than the manual one.
Mona: Dogs eat bacon. Does that make it dog food?
Rogue: I guess so... I don't like the electric one. The spinning makes me dizzy.
Mona: But dogs eat almost anything you put in front of them. That would make all those things dog food using your logic.
Sean: Who said she was using logic?
Mona: Well, I just thought...
Rogue: See, that was your first mistake...
Chibi chibi: -appears from behind Mona- When we havin tuna fish?
Rogue: As soon as this spooty head tells me where the can opener is.
Sean: o_o It's in the utensils drawer like it always is.
Rogue: -_____- And this you couldn't tell me five minutes ago?
Sean: You know how much I cherish every minute we spend together. ^__^
Rogue: You are so funny! Have you ever considered doing stand up comedy?
Sean: Actually...
Rogue: Don't... You'd starve. -Walks back to the kitchen-
Mona: Well... She certainly is very.. interesting...
Sean: Interesting is only the beginning.
Chibi chibi: -shifts from foot to foot and looks like a kid who is about to tell their parents that they've done something that they really, REALLY weren't supposed to do- Umm... Sean... You know that mad scientist that lives in our garage?
Mona: There's a mad scientist in your garage?!
Sean: Oh... He's not really mad.
Chibi chibi: Just a little upset.
Sean: He's trying to get into the Mad Scientist Club. He hasn't been very successful though.
Chibi chibi: Yeah... He cries a lot...
Sean: And none of his inventions work.
Chibi chibi: He has a nice machine with shiny buttons.
Sean: -looks worried- What machine?
Chibi chibi: The one in the garage... I like buttons! ^-^
Sean: o_O Did you push any of the buttons?
Chibi chibi: Yuppers!
Sean: And what happened?
Chibi chibi: It went WHOOOSH!! And then smoke came out. I don't think it was supposed to do that.
Sean: Well, most of his inventions do that. The silly thing probably didn't even work to begin with. Just don't do it again. We wouldn't want you getting hurt.
Chibi chibi: But it does work.
Sean: How do you know?
Rogue: -comes in with Chibi chibi's tuna sandwich- We're out of tuna... and Kool-Aid.
Sean: How could that be? We must have had at least ten cans in the cabinet.
Rogue: Well, I was makin Chibi chibi her sandwich and then I saw them in the backyard.
Sean: Them? Them who?
Rogue: Four hobbits, two men, an elf, and a dwarf. They looked hungry and thirsty, so I made them some snacks. By the way, we're out of peanut butter too.
Sean: O__O
Rogue: I was hungry!
Mona: You're joking right? You can't be serious! There are no such things as...
Pippin: -pokes his head into the room- Have you got any more of those cheese puff thingies?
Sean: Bottom cabinet near the door.
Pippin: Thanks!
Mona: What... was... that?
Sean: A hobbit.
Chibi chibi: Can I play with the elf?
Rogue: Okay... -sees Chibi chibi scamper off happily- But no shooting arrows in the house!
Mona: +__+ A hobbit... -twitch- A... hobbit... -twitch twitch- Hobbits!! Hahahahaha!!! Hobbits!! -Runs through the door, out the house, and down the street screaming "Hobbits!!"-
Merry: Poor woman...
Pippin: She never had a chance.
Rogue: Looks like we've got another door to replace.
Sean: The people at Home Depot are gonna think we're nuts.
Legolas: -with Chibi chibi on his shoulders- As they should.
Rogue: Did she sign a waiver?
Sean: Yeah.
Rogue: Oh... Well... There ya go...
Pippin: -pulls out a bag and offers it to Chibi chibi- Cheese puff?
The end! Wasn't that nice? ^_-
Where to next?
Sugar and Spice
Sex and Candy
Home