How to get chicks: Gettin lots of women is easy. All you have to do is be a cute, trendy, conformist, and own an expensive car. Chicks will go wild and flock to you if you do. But what about all those ugly/poor people out there? Theyre all outta luck and will probably be single the rest of there lives. Chapter 3: The meaning of life: The meaning of life is to amass as much material wealth as you can. Material wealth can buy you love an happiness so start early an beat out everyone. Being cute doesnt hurt that much either. Being cute and rich is the answer to it all. (note to ugly people: dont forget....wealth can buy you plastic surgery!) Chapter 4: How to get keep friends: The key to getting friends is being cute and being able to keep a superficial conversation about girls/boys/cars/hair/cuteness going. If you can handle that then you will never be in need of friends. Once you get enough friends you'll also need to be able to keep them, heres how. Dont be a bastard Dont be ignorant Dont hit on their girl(boy)friend(s) Dont comment about there uglyness Put their needs before your own Always be nice Cute people always have more friends than ugly people. Play a sport Pretend to like what everyone else likes and last but not least.... NEVER BE YOURSELF, cuz if you did theyd all probably realize you are an ignorant bastard and stop hanging out with you. Chapter 5: The Clothes Make The Man Never shop at the following stores: Goodwill Salvation Army K-mart/Wal Mart Another key to being succesful in life is wearing the right clothes. Basically, Just wear what everyone else is wearing at your school/on MTV/At the mall. But only if the people you see wearing the clothes are trendy and cool. Chapter 6: Trends for the trendy Wear as much of the following as you can: American Eagle Abercrombie and Fitch Nuatica FuBu Timberlands ADIDAS Nike Drink the following: Sprite Gatorade Dont forget, Trends are important in being popular and popularity is the key to friends. Follow this instruction manual and you will be succesful and happy in life.
