Title:
I Miss You
Author: Kat, a.k.a. KallieRose
E-mail: [email protected]
Pairing:
Buffy/Angel
Rating: Okay for everyone
Pairing: Buffy/Angel
Summary:
After the S3 finale Buffy and Angel go their separate ways. But neither can forget.
Disclaimer:
All the characters belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and whoever else
lays legal claim to them. I do this
for fun, and certainly don’t make any money from it.
Author’s notes:
Thanks to Lisa Kelley for the beta.
This is for the
Multifandom Lyric Wheel. It’s my
first shot at writing solely Buffy and Angel, and I hope it’s okay.
Basically I'm supposed to incorporate the lyrics from a song into the
story wherever I can. The lyrics are at the end of the story, and the ones
that are bold/italic are the ones that I was able to use.
Spoilers: Through the S3
finale of Buffy
I Miss You
Buffy’s POV
I miss you.
Three simple words.
I know, I say them a lot. But
like a good pair of red pumps, the truth never seems to go out of style.
It also makes me do silly things, like writing you this letter, which I know
I’ll never send. But when I
write, I can feel the things I want to feel, and I don’t have to apologize for
it. It’s like brooding, but with
a purpose.
You left me. I know you had to
leave, but that doesn't make it any easier to accept your being gone.
Doesn't even begin to touch the suckiness of your not being here.
The last time I talked to you, you were lonely and out of place.
You knew you were leaving. I
knew you were leaving. It was as if
most of you had already left.
We had just defeated the Mayor, and I was strung out on excitement and more than
a little bit of relief. And feeling brave. Really
brave. I wanted to go to you and
kiss you, in front of everyone, until I could convince you to stay.
But you turned and walked away, into the fog, and I was left with nothing but
the enormity of my loss. I was the
Chosen One. But you didn't choose
me.
I know that's not fair. You did
what was best. Best for everyone,
except for you and for me.
Do you like it there in L.A.? Amongst the garbage and city lights. So different from Sunnydale, where everything is so small.
Except the cemeteries; they just keep getting bigger.
Sometimes the inevitability of that makes me want to cry.
But I'm strong, because I know you're counting on me.
Counting on me to keep things safe here, while you do the same in L.A.
I hope you remember me. I suppose
it's kind of selfish, hoping that you're as miserable without me, as I am
without you. But, hey, I'm still a
teenager. I'm allowed a few selfish
thoughts here and there, right?
I know you'll come back someday. Somehow, I know it. Maybe
it will be the day we figure out how to make your soul permanent.
Or maybe it will be for my funeral.
I know which one I'm hoping for.
So until that day, whichever it might be, I'll continue to patrol; continue to
fight; continue to feel alone and empty. Waiting
for you to come back into my life.
Angel’s POV:|
I miss you.
All the time. Every time I
see a flash of blonde hair, or fight a demon I know we’ve faced before.
Yeah, I know, thinking about you whenever I fight a vampire or a
zombie—not terribly romantic. Then again, I’ve never been known for my big, romantic
gestures.
Do you miss me? Is your life so
full with school and slaying and the whole ‘being a teenager thing’, which I
can’t even remember, that you even find the time to think of me at all?
I know that I left so that you could enjoy a ‘normal’ life, but I
can’t help but hope you find the time to miss me while you’re living it.
L.A. is big.
Sure, I’ve lived in big cities before. I’ve
even lived in L.A. before. But this
time…I don’t know, it just feels different.
Maybe it’s because I’ve laid underneath the stars with you in
Sunnydale, and enjoyed the pristine, clean feeling of the cold morning air in a
place without trash and junkies and panhandlers on what seems like every corner.
Or maybe it’s just because you’re not here with me.
All we are is all so far. So far
away from me, from here. And
sometimes I fear that it will always be this way.
I know that you and Giles, and everyone else, are looking for a way to cement my
tired soul. I hope it happens soon,
but it probably won’t. I’ve
seen too much of life to believe that my happy ending is so easy to achieve.
So, I’ll go on fighting the good fight, be it against demons and ghosts, or
against Cordelia’s abuse of the coffee maker.
There is more than one type of evil in this world.
And I’ll dream of the day when I can hold you in my arms again, soft and warm
and so very much mine.
The End
Somewhere Out There
(performed by: Our Lady Peace)
You were looking down on me
Lost out in space
Watch the riddles glow
Watch them float away
Down here in the atmosphere
You gotta save your tired soul
You gotta save our lives
Turn on the radio
To find you on satellite
I'm waiting for the sky to fall
I'm waiting for a sign
You're falling back to me
The star that I can't see
I know you're out there
Somewhere out there
You're falling out of reach
Defying gravity
I know you're out there
Somewhere out there
When you're homesick and need a change
I miss your purple hair
I miss the way you taste
On a bed of nails awake
I'm praying that you don't burn out
Or fade away
You're falling back to me
The star that I can't see
I know you're out there
Somewhere out there
You're falling out of reach
Defying gravity
I know you're out there
Somewhere out there
You're falling back to me
The star that I can't see
I know you're out there, oh
You're falling out of reach
Defying gravity
I know you're out there
Somewhere out there
You're falling back to me
The star that I can't see
I know you're out there
Somewhere out there
You're falling out of reach
Defying gravity
I know you're out there
Somewhere out there
You're falling back to me.
Well I know
I know
You're falling out of reach
I know
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