| Why do cemeteries have fences around them? Because people are dying to get in. What is a vampire's favorite holiday? Fangsgiving. What's it like to be kissed by a vampire? It's a pain in the neck. How does a vampire like his food served? In bite sized pieces ! Why did the vampire take up acting? It was in his blood! |
| Vampire Jokes |
| SICK JOKE Three vampires walked into a bar one night. They sit down at the bar and the bartender asks the first vampire what he would like to drink. The vampire replies, "I would like a bloody Mary, please." So the bartender gets him his drink. He then takes the second vampire's order. The vampire replies, "I would like a nice warm cup of blood." So the bartender sends an employee out back to shoot a chicken and drain his blood. The bartender then asks the third vampire for his order and he replies, "I would like a tall, hot glass of water." The bartender gives him a funny look because he is puzzled by this order. He says, "Why do you want water? You're a vampire, aren't you supposed to order something that has to do with blood?" The vampire holds up a dirty tampon and replies, "I like tea." |
| BLOOD JOKE Three vampires went into a bar and sat down. The barmaid came over to take their orders. "And what would you, er, gentlemen like tonight?" The first vampire said, "I'll have a mug of blood." The second vampire said, "I'll have a mug of blood." The third vampire shook his head at his companions and said, "I will have a glass of plasma." The barmaid wrote down each order, went to the bar and called to the bartender, "Two bloods and a blood light." |
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| More to come!!! |