“Christmas 2004”
   By C.Gifford

Announcer: Before our Feature Presentation, here’s a sneak peek.

Shary Bobbins plays a song.

Shary: I’m going to play a song called “I saw three ships.”
*singing* I saw three ships come sailing in, on Christmas Day, on Christmas Day.
I saw three ships come sailing in, on Christmas Day in the morning.
And what was in the ships of three, on Christmas Day, on Christmas Day?

Kane Blueriver and Ricky Livewire laughs at Shary’s performance.

Shary: Shut up, terds! And what was in the ships of three, on Christmas
Day in the morning? The Virgin Mary and Christ were there, on
Christmas Day, on Christmas Day.

Boys: *laughs*

Shary: The Virgin Mary and… Shut up, terds!
and Christ were there, on Christmas Day in the morning.
Let us all rejoice Amen On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day.

Boys: *laughter growing*

Shary: Let us all… I told you to shut up!
rejoice Amen On Christmas Day in the morning.
Shary is starting to get ticked, on Christmas Day,
on Christmas Day.

Boys: *laughter*

Shary: Shary got up and killed the terds, on Christmas Day,
in the morning. Arrrrrrrgh!

Announcer: And now our Feature Presentation…

A red drape peels up.

Announcer: Whitey Duvall presents Whitey's Christmas Thingamajig!
And now your host, Whitey Duvall!

Whitey: Hi, I'm Whitey. Welcome to my Christmas
special. It's snowing, a feature presentation, and stole
an entry from Citry's LJ. Let's watch her LJ thingy.

Whitey turns on the TV. We see Citry Chance
draw her Christmas pics on the computer.

Citry: *draws her Christmas pics* Hello, you have
stumbled into my Live Journal. This is my entry for
December 20th - 25th, 2004. Yeah, it's basically
a Christmas themed entry. Enjoy! *smiles*
It all started on Monday, December 20th...

December 20, 2004-
Shou Yanagi and Keita Aona sleep peacefully.
Keita is wearing his bunny pajamas he got last
Christmas, and Shou is wearing a white T-shirt
and heart boxer shorts. They slumber for a while
until Asami shouted for them.

Asami: Shou! Keita! I want you guys to
come downstairs in just two minutes!
And I mean two minutes!

Keita gets to the door, but Shou gets
there first.

Keita: C'mon, Yanagi! I gots here first!

Shou: Tough!

Keita whacks Shou ubiquitously.

Shou: Cut it out!

The boys arrive downstairs for breakfast.
As they got down, Miyako Asami and Kaede
Kurenai had already fixed Keita and Shou’s
breakfast. It’s just bacon and eggs is all.

Kaede: Here you go, Shou.

Shou: Mmmm, bacon and eggs. Thanks, Kaede.
*starts eating*

Asami: Here you go, Keita.

Keita: I like eggs! *plays with them*

Hinoki: Kei-chan, would you eat! There are
starving people in China.

Keita: Momma...

Shou: *gulps down his MD Livewire* Ahh…
Good breakfast. *looks at Akamatsu*
What’s Akamatsu doing?

Asami: He’s just fixing the radiator.

Akamatsu: That son of a gun would freeze up in the
middle of summer on the equator!

Hinoki: Little busters!

Akamatsu: Thanks... hold it!

The furnace breaks out.

Akamatsu: It's a clinker! Those blasted stupid heaters doggone it!

Akamatsu walks down a few stairs and fell the rest of the way down.

Akamatsu: Darn skates! *coughing* Oh for cripes sake open up the damper will you? Who the heck turned it all the way down? AGAIN! Oh blasted!

Citry: *voice-over* In the heat of battle, Akamatsu wove a tapestry
of obscenities that as far as we know is still hanging in space over
the creek.

As Shou gets ready for work, Asami dresses Keita
for school.

Citry: *voice-over* For Shou’s correspondence, getting ready for work
is like deep-sea diving, evaluating to Keita dressing up for school.

Shou: Come on, Asami...

Asami: Don't hold up, Shou.

Keita muffles through his scarf,
as if he had an expression of grief.

Asami: *takes the scarf off Keita* What is it?

Keita: I can't put my arms down! *cries*

Asami attempts to put Keita's arms down,
but they keep rising back up.

Asami: You put your arms down when you
get to school.

Keita: *cries loudly*

Shou and Keita head out for their daily drill.
Then Kane Blueriver showed up.

Kane: Hey, Shou! Wait up, man.

Shou: Sup, Kane.

Kane: Dice and Xelly ought to be here
at any point.

After that, Xelloss Metallium and Daisuke Aurora
arrive.

Shou: Hey guys.

Xelloss: So this guy had his tongue wedged to a flag
pole.

Kane: Yeah… SO!

Daisuke: What he’s actually referring to; is that there
was a man, who had his tongue stuck to the flag
pole, followed by the tracks. The guy’s tongue was
cut off, since they couldn’t get it off.

Keita tries to catch up with the boys.

Keita: COME ON YOU GUYS! WAIT UP! Come on, guys…
Wait up…

Xelloss: Hey geek!

Keita fell down on his back in the frosty snow, as if
a turtle struggled to get back up.

Keita: I can’t get up… I CAN’T GET UP! YANAGI!!
I CAN’T GET UP, YANAGI!!

Shou: *sigh* Wait up for me, Kane.

Keita: I can’t get up! Yanagi! I can’t get up.

Shou: Sit up, Keita. You’ll be fine.

Then the boys finish their daily stuff for the day,
therefore Shou and Keita went to bed.

December 21, 2004-
The next day, Xelloss confronts Daisuke
to put his tongue on the flag pole.

Daisuke: Are you kidding? Stick my tongue to that stupid pole?
That's ludicrous!

Xelloss: That's because you know it'll stick!

Daisuke: You're chock-full of it!

Xelloss: Oh yeah?

Daisuke: Yeah!

Xellosss: Well I double-DOG-dare you!

Citry: *voice-over* NOW it was serious, a double-dog-dare. What else was there
but a "triple dare you"? And then, the coup de grace of all dares the
sinister triple-dog-dare.

Xelloss: I TRIPLE-dog-dare you!

Citry: *voice-over* Xelloss created a slight breach of etiquette
by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!

Daisuke gets next to the pole.

Xelloss: Go on, smart butt you do it.

Daisuke: I’m going, I’m going…

Xelloss: How does it feel?

Daisuke: *gets his tongue stuck* My tongue is tuck!
Well, don’t just tand there! Help!

Xelloss: How about snatching it out.

Kane: Xelloss that will NEVER work!
This is your friggin’ fault!

Shou: Just call 911. I’m convinced they’ll
help him out of this situation.

Kane: Ding! That’s a superior idea, Shou.
Let’s call 911!

Daisuke: Please hurry!

Shou: Hello, 911. This is Shou Yanagi. Yes,
a friend of mine has his tongue wedged into
a flag pole. We’re trying our best to get it off.
However, it would be better if I called you.
Thank you. Bye.

A few hours later, Daisuke has frost on the
tip of his tongue.

Xelloss: Good afternoon, Frosty.

Daisuke: Hut up! It’s your fault!

Xelloss: Okay, so I made an inaccuracy. Haven’t I been
punished enough?

Daisuke: *sighs* Apology accepted. *pats Xelloss in the back*

Shou: There’s my stop. See you guys later.

Kane: Later, Shou. *gets out his Gameboy Advance SP*

Then, Whitey Duvall showed up.

Whitey: Hewwo.

Kane: Hello…

Whitey: What’s that? *takes a gander at his Gameboy*
Wow! What a neat Etch-a-Sketch!

Daisuke: It's a Gameboy you idiot!

Whitey: Can I plays it?

Kane: Uh… no. Do I know you
from somewhere?

Whitey: I was part of your basketball thingy last year.

Kane: Yeah, I remember now… you were with us that year.
Now go away.

Daisuke: Geez, this geezer is worse than Pyoro.
Who is he?

Kane: Whitey Duvall.

Daisuke: Oh…

Kane: *looks at Whitey* Would you beat it!
*kicks Whitey in the butt*

At dinner time, Keita fools around with
his meal.

Citry: *voice-over* Every group has a guy who
won’t eat. Keita Aona had not eaten voluntarily
in over three years.

Hinoki: Oh, Kei-chan, don't play with your food. Eat it!

Keita: Aw, gee.

Hinoki: Starving people would be happy to have that.

Keita: *moans*

Akamatsu: Will you stop playing with your food!
Otherwise, I’d give you something to cry about.

Shou: Can I have some more?

Citry: *voice-over* Shou’s friend, Miyako Asami
hasn’t had a fork herself in fifteen years.

Keita: Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.

Akamatsu: Allright, I'll get that kid to eat. Where's my screw
driver and my plumber's aid? I'll open up his jaws and
I'll shove it in.

Asami: Keita? How do the little piggies go?

Keita: *oinks loudly*

Asami: That’s right, “oink-oink.” Now,
show me where the piggies eat. This is your
troth. Be a good boy, show me how the piggies
eat.

Keita: *oinks some more*

Then a thud on the door transpired.

Akamatsu: Someone’s at the door.

Hinoki: What could it be?

Akamatsu: It could be a bowling alley!

Kaede: How are they going to deliver a bowling alley here tonight?

Akamatsu: They'll send the deed for cripsake. I didn't expect
them to send a whole darn bowling alley.

Guy: I got a package for an Akamatsu.

Akamatsu: Yeah, right here.

Guy: I need you sign here.

The UPS guy left, and Akamatsu reads a side
of the box with the prize that he won.

Akamatsu: Fra-gee-lay. That must be Italian.

Asami: Uh, I think that says FRAGILE.

Akamatsu: Oh, yeah.

Shou: Wow…

Akamatsu shows Homer Simpson his major award.

Akamatsu: It's a Major Award!

Homer: Shucks I wouldn't know that. It looks like a lamp. 

Akamatsu: It is a lamp, you nincompoop. It’s a Major Award. I won it!

Homer: Dang, heck, you say won it? 

Akamatsu: Yeah, it will have mind powers, Sweet, my power.

Kaede: Isn’t it time for someone’s time to go out for the evening?

Shou: Oh, yeah! That reminds me… I’m supposed to be with Kane
and Xelloss 30 minutes ago. Thanks, Kaede. *kisses her*

Kaede: Shou, how long will be gone?

Shou: Don’t worry; I’ll be home in time for Christmas. I promise.

Citry: *voice-over* The only one thing in the world could've dragged
Shou away from the elastic glow of stimulating sex gleaming in the
window, has to be his friends on a night out.

Akamatsu: Who turned on the lights?

December 22, 2004-
Mitsune Konno and Ryoko get drunk at the café.
We see Kahn Souphinosphone as the wine waiter.

Citry: *voice-over* Now, for Narusegawa’s best friend,
Mitsune Konno. Like Homer Simpson and Peter Griffin united,
she too is an alcoholic. Ryoko usually does this every day. As for
Kitsune, she does this every Christmas at the Chinese café.

Kahn: Two times in a row already, miss Konno?

Kitsune: *drunk* Screw you!

Vash the Stampede approached and drank
some more sake.

Vash: *guzzles some sake, then belches*

Kahn: Congratulations! Now please excuse me while I go take shower!

Vash: *humming naively* I got to go now.

Citry: *voice-over* Now for Vash the Stampede, he’s an alcoholic
of course. Like some kind of male Mitsune.

Meanwhile, Fam and Ihrie are outside of the Chinese café.

Fam: What do you want for Christmas, Ihrie?

Ihrie: I don't know. Stop asking.

Then, Fam and Ihrie saw Kitsune and Ryoko
drunk as mules. Vash goes to his car, until the
cops disembarked.

Wiggum: Allright, Vash the Stampede… You weren’t going
to drive home in that condition, are you?

Vash: What who me? Nah, I’m licking the car. See?

Wiggum: Okay then… Just stay out of nuisance.

Citry: *voice-over* Cops loved to say things like that but felons knew better.
They knew darn well it was always better not to get caught.

Inside the restaurant, Kitsune is intoxicated like a tedious zombie,
talking to a microphone stand. Motoko Aoyama, Shinobu Maehara,
Naru Narusegawa, and Kaolla Su sat next to the intoxicated Kitsune.

Kitsune: C’mon! Christmas idol on! What’s wrong
with you, Skinny?

Motoko: Kitsune, that’s a microphone stand.

Kitsune: Tell the joke, Skinny!

Motoko: This is a karaoke contest.

Kitsune: *hugs Motoko*

Rachael Moore gets up on the stage,
and sings a song.

Rachael: This hit is called Rudolph the Red
nosed reindeer. *singing* Rudolph the Red-
Nosed Reindeer had a very shiny nose, 
And if you ever saw it, you would even say it glows. 
All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names; 
They never let poor Rudolph join in any reindeer games. 
Then one foggy Christmas Eve, Santa came to say, 
Rudolph with your nose so bright, won't you guide my sleigh?
Then how the reindeer loved him how they shouted out with glee, 
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, you'll go down in history.

Then Claus Valca and Lavie Head make an appearance
at the café.

Claus: I heard they have some of the best meals.

Lavie: It’s supposed to be family orientated.

Kitsune: Here’s family orientated! *flaunts her
big bosoms at Claus’ face*

Claus: Lavie, help here! I can’t bear to look!

Lavie: Don’t look, Claus!

Claus: *annoyed look* Thanks for sharing the Holiday spirit, psycho.

Kitsune: What’s your name? *hiccups*

Claus: Uh, Lavie, she’s just drunk.

Lavie: We’ll come back when she sobers up.

Kahn: Tank you. Tank you. Fam and Ihrie will
be singing Christmas song for you.

Kitsune: Jingley bells! *collapses*

Citry: *voice-over* For Fam and Ihrie, they may
be a pair of my best associates, but they have been
singing “Jingle Bell Rock” about four years in a row.

Fam: Hit it!

We see Naru on guitar, Motoko on drums, Shinobu
on piano, Su on bass, and Kitsune, who is too drunk
too play, on acoustic guitar.

Fam: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock,
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring,

Ihrie: Snowin' and blowin' up bushels of fun,
Now the jingle hop has begun.

Fam: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock,
Jingle bells chime, in jingle bell time,

Ihrie: Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
in the frosty air.

Fam: What a bright time, it's the right time
to rock the night away,

Ihrie: Jingle bell time is a swell time,
to go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh.

Fam: Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet,
Jingle around the clock,

Both: Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
that's the jingle bell rock.

Naru: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock,
Jingle bells chime, in jingle bell time,

Ihrie: Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
in the frosty air.

Fam: What a bright time, it's the right time
to rock the night away,

Ihrie: Jingle bell time is a swell time,
to go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh.

All three: Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet,
Jingle around the clock,
Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
That's the jingle bell,
That's the jingle bell,
That's the jingle bell rock.

Ihrie: Bop mm bop bop yeah!

Everyone claps for their performance.

Naru: Where did you learn the “Bop mm bop bop yeah!” bit?

Ihrie: From that “Flirtin’ with Disaster” song.

Meanwhile, at 10:00…
Kane, Xelloss and Shou go for their
errands. Their first stop was at McDonald’s.

Citry: *voice-over* Kane, Xelloss and Shou doing
their guy stuff’s kinda like a “no girls permitted” thing.
Their first stop was a quick bite to eat.

The boys arrive at McDonald’s, with them is that
annoying Whitey.

Shou: Kane, might I ask you who that little man is?

Kane: *notices Whitey* You again!

Whitey: I wanted to tags along.

Xelloss: No no no.

Whitey: Aw, c’mon!

Shou: The answer’s no, uh… what’s his name?

Kane: Whitey.

Shou: No, Whitey. *kicks Whitey*

Whitey: Aw, darnit!

Whitey left McDonald’s angrily.

Meanwhile at the Chinese café, Fam and Ihrie
just finished their performance. Subsequently,
Hibiki Tokai and Dita Liebely showed up.

Ryoko: Yo, Hibiki! We’re over here!

Hibiki: So there you are.

Kitsune persuades Motoko into drinking sake.

Kitsune: C’mon, Motoko. Drinky-poo! *hiccups*

Motoko: Kitsune, stop acting like a tedious idiot.

Kitsune: How old are you?

Motoko: 21, but that’s NOT the point.

Kitsune: When did you turn 21?

Motoko: Three weeks ago.

Kitsune: You’re old enough to drink.

Motoko: *sigh* If you say so, Kitsune.
*gulps one sake* This stuff isn’t half bad.
Now can I prevent myself from drinking?

Kitsune: Oh, fine. Don’t your get your panties in a knot.

Kahn: Lady and gentleman, one more song
from Hibiki Tokai.

Hibiki: This hit is called “Santa Claus is watching
you” by Ray Stevens. *singing*
Now babydoll, sweetie-pie, sugarplum,
honey-bunch, angel face,
You know you better be good
And act like two fine lovers should.
Be careful what you say and do
'Cause Santa Claus is watchin' you.

Dita: He's everywhere, he's everywhere.

Hibiki: You'd better kiss and hold me tight.
An' give me good lovin' every night.
'Cause you'll be sorry if ya make me blue
'Cause Santa Claus is watchin' you.

Dita: He's everywhere, he's everywhere.

Hibiki: Well you may thing you can sneak around
and get away with something
But there ain't no way, 
'Cause Santa's no fool, he's really super cool.
He's the secret head of the CIA.
Eesh, Iish, crime don't pay
You can't do nothin' cause you're never alone
He's even got a wire tap on your phone.
So baby if you ever but do me wrong.
Break my heart and leave me alone.
When Christmas comes, you be crying too.
'Cause Santa Claus is watching you.

Dita: He's everywhere, he's everywhere.

Hibiki: Every Christmas season, he climbs on his sled full of toys,
With fuel exhaust and side mirrors, the foxtails, the mud flaps, 
the leopard-skin seats covers
And spreads Christmas cheer to all good little girls and boys.
*speaking* Vash, off the stage!

Vash: *drunk* Then he says on Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen,
Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen, and Bruce and Marvin, Leon,
Cletus and George and Bill and Slick,
and Do-right, Clyde and Ace and Blackie and Queenie, and Prince
and Spot and Rover
So where's Rudolph - He's on a stakeout at your house.
You can run, you can hide, but you can't get away
Got binoculars focused on you everyday.

Hibiki: Get off the friggin’ stage! *pushes Vash*
*singing* So baby if you ever but do me wrong.
Break my heart and leave me alone.
When Christmas comes, you be crying too.
'Cause Santa Claus is watching you.

Dita: He's everywhere, he's everywhere.

Hibiki: Yeah Santa Claus is watching you
he's everywhere oh lord have mercy
Santa's got his eyes all over you.
You better watch out -
Ooh, look out there's Santa Claus now peepin' around the corner
Shoot, you in deep trouble.
You know that?
I don't think you understand the situation.
I got a call into the North Pole right now.
Them little elves gonna come down here
Whoop up on you.
I mean you gotta be true blue, through and through
Or Santa gonna get you.

Dita: He's everywhere, he's everywhere.

Vash: *hiccups* Bravo!

Hibiki: It would’ve been a splendid performance!
No thanks to you!

At the dance party, various dancers dance all through
the building with an inflatable Santa. Kane, Xelloss and Shou
saw Mamimi in happenstance.

Mamimi: Hey guys.

Shou: Mamimi, I didn’t know you work here?

Mamimi: I’m just paying back Ta-kun.

Xelloss: You mean Naota?

Mamimi: That brat-butt, Nah.
I mean my husband in the USA.

Kane: Oh…

Mamimi: Want some of these?

Kane: What are they?

Mamimi: Cheeseburgers.

Citry: *voice-over* Mamimi has been working at the dance
place for the past six months, and she’s doing all well. As for
her and her drug problem, the boys are one walk away.

Meanwhile five minutes later, Shou and Kane are stoned, and laughing
quite stridently, as for Xelloss; he watches, not observing that little
bump has started the car rolling.

Xelloss: You guys are totally stoned! Shou, Shou, wake up! I can't drive this car! Allright,
where are the keys!? Where are the keys!? Shou, wake up Shou! You guys are totally high!
You have to drive, I can't compel!

A dog sniffs at a fire hydrant, lifts one leg, and gets splashed by the car.
The dog, stunned, looks at the hydrant.

Xellosss: Dumb dog!

A couple is chatting. He pushes up against her to evade the car,
putting his hand on her boob. When he steps back, she hits him.

Xelloss: Look out! Look out!

Xelloss has got the wheel from the back seat, steering down the hill. He comes through a
passageway.

Xelloss: Get a grip on yourself Xelly. We're not going to die. *nearly misses Chief Wiggum,
steers off the ramp* Oh yes we are! *the car lands on the next ramp*

Meanwhile, at Akamatsu’s place, Keita is sitting
in front of the TV watching Krusty’s Christmas special.

Announcer: It's a Krusty Kinda Khristmas, brought to you by ILG: selling
your body's chemicals after you die.  And by Li'l Sweetheart
Cupcakes -- a subsidiary of ILG.

Krusty: *walking in with a turkey* Oh, hi!  I didn't hear you come
in.  Welcome to my home. *outside the "window", Kent Brockman prepares for a
newscast* Ho, ho.  *closing the blind* Say, did I hear some carolers?
*walks over to door, opens it*

Carolers: Come, they told me...

Krusty: Hey!  It's respected private citizen Tom Landry!  And South
American sensation Xoxchisha -- Xoxchoshe -- Xox -- oh, boy.
*walks away*

Announcer: Now, stay tuned for a video Christmas card from Tupac Shapur.

Hinoki turns off the television.

Keita: Hey, I was watching that!

Hinoki: Let’s go Kei-chan, we’re going to
get a tree.

Keita: *singing* Papa John’s!

The group (minus Shou) left to go and get a Christmas tree.

Asami: Almost forgot, got to conserve power, don’t want to
waste it.

Hinoki: Come on, Kei-chan let’s go.

At the Christmas tree bargain.

Tree Man: Can I help you?

Akamatsu: We’re here to buy a Christmas tree.

Tree Man: Got one right here.

Asami: This isn't one of those trees where all the needles falls off, is it?

Tree Man: No, that's them balsams.

Akamatsu: You know, one of my friends just bought of those
brand new green, plastic trees.

Tree Man: Oh no!

Akamatsu: Darn thing looked like it was made of green tube
cleaners. Hee hee hee hee.

Asami: It's a very nice tree.

Tree Man: *speedily* I'll thrown in some rope and tie
it to your car for you.

Akamatsu: You got a deal.

Tree Man: Deal.

In the car, the group minus Kaede, who is worried about Shou,
sings “Jingle Bells.”

All (minus Kaede): *singing* Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.
Oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh! Jingle bells,
jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse
open sleigh!

Keita: *makes a farty noise*

Akamatsu: Doggone it! Blow out!

On the highway, the car has gotten a flat tire.

Akamatsu: Ah ha!

Akamatsu eagerly gets out of the car.

Asami: Not again.

Akamatsu: Four minutes. Time me.

Citry: *voice-over* Actually Akamatsu esteemed it. He had always pictured himself in the pits of the Indianapolis
speedway in the 500. Akamatsu’s auxiliary tires were only actually tires in the intellectual sense. They were round
and had once been made of rubber.

Kaede: *sigh*

Hinoki: What’s wrong, Kaede?

Kaede: I’m just concerned about Shou.

Asami: I’m sure he’ll be just fine.
*to Keita* Keita, why don’t you go
help Akamatsu.

Keita: Really? Can I? What about Yanagi? That’s
his job to do it.

Hinoki: Kei-chan, you’re 15½, you’re a young man.

Keita: Okay then. *smiles foolishly*

Asami: Watch out for traffic.

Keita: Okay.

Citry: *voice-over* Now, for those flat tire circumstances, Shou generally
facilitates Akamatsu to amend the tire. *sighs irritably* But this’ll be
Keita’s first time.

Akamatsu: What are you doing out here?

Keita: Asami said I should help.

Akamatsu: Oh yeah.

Keita: Yeah.

Citry: *voice-over* Eight minutes later, Keita had plunged
the bolts, and about to say something drastic.

Keita Oooh f-f-f-raaaaaggggg!

Citry: *voice-over* Not only did Keita say "frag." He said THE word, the big
one, the queen-mother of unappealing words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word!

Akamatsu: What did you say?

Keita: Uh, um...

Akamatsu: That's... what I thought you said. Get in the car. Go on!

Citry: *voice-over* This’ll be amusing for me to watch. As for Keita, it was all over - he was dead. What would it be?
The guillotine? Hanging? The chair? The rack? The Chinese water torture? Hmmph. Mere child's play compared to
what certainly awaited him.

Asami: Eight minutes.

Akamatsu: Did you know what Keita just said?

Asami: No what?

Akamatsu: I’ll tell you what he said. Sakura.

Sakura covers her ears, as Akamatsu whispered
the word in Asami’s ear.

Asami: *screams* Keita!	

At the house, Keita has rinsed his mouth out
with soap.

Citry: *voice-over* Over the years, Keita got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. Though his personal partiality
was for Lux, he found that Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner flavor - heavy, but with a touch of melodious
efficiency. Life Buoy, on the other hand...

Keita: YECCHH! 

Asami: You’ve learned your lesson, Keita?
Are you all set to tell me?

Keita: Mmmhmmmm…

Asami: Now, where did you hear that word?

Citry: *voice-over* Now, I know that juvenile
nerd heard that word from Shou and Akamatsu.
However, there was no turning back now…

Keita: Miaka!

Asami: Oh, I see… *jostles the soap back in Keita’s mouth*
Hello, is this Misses Yuuki? Oh, I see that it’s her brother, Keisuke.
How are you?

Keisuke: *through phone* I’m fine.

Asami: Listen; did you know what Keita just said?

Keisuke: *through phone* No, what?

Asami: He said… *whispers the word*

Keisuke: *through phone* Man, not that word!

Asami: Do you know where he heard it from?

Keisuke: *through phone* Probably from Shou or
old man Akamatsu.

Asami: No, he said that he heard it from your sister.

Keisuke: *through phone* What! WHAT! WHAT!!
Miaka, I thought I told NOT to use that particular word!

Miaka: *through phone, in background* I didn’t mean to!

Asami hangs up the phone.

Asami: Rinse out and go to bed.

As Keita goes to bed, Asami puts the soap in her mouth,
afterward douses her mouth.

Meanwhile on the highway, Xelloss continues to drive the car.

Xelloss: Here, I'm sorry. *passes the steering wheel to Kane*

Kane: Oh no! This is my car, my wheels, my power wagon! *thrashes in the water*

Shou: Hey, Kane, desiccate.

Kane: Okay.

Shou: Ah! *clutches headache* What's going on? Where's Mamimi?

Xelloss: Mamimi’s gone, Shou.

Shou: What?

Kane: Guys, I think she drugged us at that party.

Shou gets disturbed, but holds it together in front of the guys.

Shou: Well thank you, little Miss Ambition.

Xelloss: Huh?

Kane: Ooo!

Shou: Well it ain't that easy. She owes me a…

Xelloss: Owes you? Hmm! I see.

Kane: Morehead’s only four hours away.

Xelloss: Going to take us a hundred hours.
We only got partially a car left. *laughs*

Kane: *raises his hand to smack Xelloss*

The boys are in the community fountain, plus one smashed car.
Kane and Shou are choking.

Wiggum: Freeze scumbags!

Wiggum pulls up, sirens blaring. His door opens up, but he still uses
the speakerphone on his vehicle.

Wiggum: Okay you punks… What are you doing in a
community fountain?

Shou: I give up Wiggy, what are we doing in a community cascade?

Wiggum: Okay wise guys, into the car. Now.

Kane: Why?

Wiggum: That's a 4-19, B&M: bathing misdemeanor.
You're lucky I'm not running you in for a 4-31: reprehensible
swimwear.

Xelloss: *examines his shirt*

Shou: C'mon Kane.

Kane: Huh?

Shou: I'll get the verification.

Wiggum: Oh no *grabs Shou* I'll get the evidence.

Shou: Nah, I'll get the evidence. No, you get the evidence.

Wiggum: No, I'll get it.

Shou: Nope.

Wiggum: I'll get it! You, *throws Shou on the car* get in the car. *mumbling*
Trying to con a law officer... well let me tell you one thing, buddy; that's 6-37,
and this time, I've got you red handed.

Shou: Darnit.

Wiggum: *picks up the steering wheel with a pencil* Someday
you're going to show gratitude.

Kane: You're absolutely right! *sound of the car door closing*

Shou: *sigh* I promised Kaede I’d be home in time for Christmas…

Kane: We’re going to get out of here. You’ll see.

Citry: *voice-over* Looks to me, these need a getaway plan
for this scenario.

December 23, 2004-
Keita gets up in the crack of dawn, and plays with
his Cheerios.

Hinoki: Kei-chan, how many times have gone through this?

Keita: I like my eggs!

Hinoki: Pick up those Cheerios! *to Asami*
Hey, today is Naru’s 2nd anniversary
with Citry.

Asami: Well, if you want you can call Citry and
Naru, and ring a bell to them.

Then a crash occurred.

Akamatsu: Where's the glue?

Asami: We're out of glue. 

Akamatsu: You used up all the glue on purpose!
Why did you touch that? You were always jealous of this lamp.

Asami: Jealous of a plastic...

Akamatsu: Jealous! Jealous because I WON.

Asami: That's ridiculous. Jealous. Jealous of WHAT? That is...
The ugliest lamp I have ever seen in my entire existence!

Citry: *voice-over* Now it was out.

Akamatsu is futile at repairing it.

Citry: *voice-over* With as much dignity as he could collect, Akamatsu
gathered up the sad remains of his shattered Major Award. Later that night,
alone in the garden, he buried it next to the garage. Now I could never be sure,
but I thought that I heard the sound of "Taps" being played. Gently…

Meanwhile, at the Mall; Gene Starwind, Faye
Valentine and Spike Spiegel are going to work
as Christmas elves again. With Peter Griffin as
Santa.

Peter: Ready for the kids tonight?

Spike: Yeah, I guess.

Faye: What’s so bad regarding children?

Gene: They’re raucous brat children. Though
a couple might be teens striking puberty.

Peter: Great! Now we’re all set!

In the prison, Kane, Shou and Xelloss are in
their cell. Joe Swanson ensures on them.

Shou: Hold on to your privates, generals, we're going through.

Joe: Halt!

Kane: Ah, dangit!

Joe: You weren’t scheduling to escape, were you?

Shou: Chief Clancy Piggum, these are scientists, big shots.

Joe: Sorry Chief, there's trouble inside *take the paper* and it's my job to…

Shou: *takes paper back* That's great. You're doing a good job.
We'll be on our way.

Before Joe noticed, the boys escaped.

Joe: Thanks anyways, Chief *takes paper back* I'll just check this...
Hey, this is a tuna fishing license!

Citry: *voice-over* Good ol’ Shou, always bribing Mr. Swanson
into an escape plan.

At another accommodation, Yakumo Fuji finishes installing
the lights atop the house (falling to the lawn from the roof).
Before he tells Pai, the boys arrive.

Yakumo: Hey guys. Check out the decorations.

Shou: *panting*

Yakumo tells Pai to turn the lights, and the lights light up, sort of.
Most of the bulbs have scorched out.  

Kane: Nice try, Yakumo.

Akito Tenkawa plugs in his Christmas lights and his house lights up in
electronic affluence, complete with a Santa on the roof that
says, “Ho ho ho.”

Akito: What do you think of my Santa?

Yakumo: Wow, Akito. I’m surprised…

Jinto Lin comes outside.

Jinto: He and I purchased this Santa, and sat it up.

Yakumo: What’s going on?

Shou: We escaped from the reformatory. But we
made it out okay.

Yakumo: Well, nice seeing you, man. Where are you going?

Shou: I’m going home. I promised Kaede I’d be
home for Christmas.

Meanwhile, it gets late at night. Akamatsu and the
group are going to see Santa tonight. But first they
the parade.

Sakura: Look, it’s Mickey!

Akamatsu: Yeah, I see it.

Keita: Akamatsu, the store closes in ten minutes!

Asami: Let’s not worry about it, Keita.

Keita: It’s the same dumb parade as last year.

Asami: Keita, will you calm down?

Keita: But Asami?

Asami: Hush!

Akamatsu: Shut up, Keita!
*looks at the parade float*
There he is!

Sakura: Allright, there’s Santa.

Keita: Can we go! Can we go!

Akamatsu: Yes, we can go.

Temporarily, Rachael proceeds to the scene,
only with Conan Edogawa on her side.

Rachel: Hi, guys!

Keita: Hi, Conan! I like poopie thanks to Keitaro.

Conan: You’re a moron… *thinking* Idiot…

Asami: There’s Santa Claus, now take Conan’s
hand, and we’ll see you later.

Akamatsu: Yeah, don’t get lost.

Keita and Conan went to the line to see Santa.

Old Man: Hey, hey kid! Just what do you
think you’re doing?

Keita: Going to see Santa.

Old Man: The line ends here, it begins there.

Conan: That’s a long line. Let’s go.

Citry: *voice-over* The line waiting to see Santa Claus expanded all the way
back to Terre Haute. And Keita and Conan were at the end of it.

Keita: I like Santa.

Conan: Yeah.

Citry: *voice-over* Let's face it, the majority of Keita and
Conan were scoffers. But minutes before zero hour, it did
not pay to take chances.

A lady in a Wicked Witch of the West costume approached up
to Conan.

Witch: Such a pretty little boy.

Conan: Don’t bother me, I’m a… I’m thinking.

Keita: I like The Wizard of Oz. I like the Tin Man.

Gene: See what I mean? *points to Keita*

Peter: Come on up on Santa's lap, here's a wet one. And
what's your name little boy? And what do you want for
Christmas, Billy? A toy truck? Get him off my lap and
get my a towel.

Billy is pushed down the slide.

Peter: Oh I hate the smell of tapioca.
If Hugbee thinks I'm working one minute
past 9:00, he can kiss my foot. Ho ho ho.

Conan: Come on, Keita.

Now, it was Keita’s turn to see Santa.
Subsequently, he screams bloody murder.
Now it was Conan’s turn.

Faye: C’mon, kid.

Peter: Ho ho ho!

Faye: C’mon!

Peter: Ho ho! And what’s your name, little boy?

Spike: Hey kid! Hurry up, the store’s closing!

Faye: Listen little boy, we’ve got a lot of people
waiting here, so get going!

Peter: And what’s your name little boy?

Gene: *sigh* C’mon, kid…

Peter: How about a pleasant football?

Conan: *thinking* Football? Football? What's a football?

Citry: *voice-over* With a cataleptic will Conan’s
voice squeaked out “football.”

Peter: Okay, get him out of here. 

Conan: *thinking* A football? Oh no, what was I doing?
Wake up, Stupid! Wake up! *is shoved down the slide, but he stops
himself and climbs back up* No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder
Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!

Peter: You'll shoot your eye out, kid. Merry Christmas.
Ho, ho, ho!

Conan: Nooooooooo!!! *lands on Keita*

Meanwhile, Asuka Langley Shoryu is a big spender,
who is buying all this stuff, with Shinji Ikari holding
nearly all of it.

Shinji: Asuka, how much longer are we going to shop!
How are you going to pay for all of this!

Asuka: Oh, don’t worry, Shinji. I’ve got my American Express
card. I usually leave home without it.

Shinji: Next time, I’m going to leave home without you!

Meanwhile, Yomiko Readman shops for… you guessed
it, books; tons and tons of manuscripts.

Yomiko: Excuse me, how much are all these books?

Cashier: About $200.00, if you buy all of them.

Yomiko: Sold! *cuddles the books she just bought*

Then, Edward Elric and his brother, Alphonse show up.

Edward: Hey, Yomiko. Whoa, that is a HAUL!

Yomiko: Thank you. I’m going to read them when
I get home.

Alphonse: Have fun.

Yomiko admires her books she just bought, then
Mika Seido and her two friends, Tiki Musicanova
and Sofia showed up.

Sofia: Talk about a big haul of books…

Yomiko: I’m going to examine all of them.

Tiki: Good luck, it’ll take you the entire night to read them.

Mika: Tiki, I’m confident she’ll relax to interpret
all those books. No offense, Yomiko.

Yomiko: None taken.

Then Yomiko bumps into her old friend, Nenene Sumiregawa
and the Paper Sisters; Michelle Chan, Maggie Mui and Anita King.

Nenene: Yomiko, is that you?

Yomiko: Nenene, I’m so glad to see you.

Nenene: I see you bought a lot of books, as always.

Yomiko: Yep.

Anita: Like you, Michelle.

Michelle: Can Maggie and I read those books
when you’re done with them?

Yomiko: Sure.

Maggie: Shall we get going?

Nenene: Bye, Yomiko. Nice seeing you again.

Peter: Bye bye, Lisa! Ho ho ho!

At the house, Akamatsu sets up the Christmas tree.
Then, Shou arrives in time for Christmas.

Kaede: Shou, you’re back.

Shou: Told you I come back home in time for Christmas.
So, you guys setting up the tree?

Akamatsu: Yep.

At that instant, the fuse goes out.

Akamatsu: Don't anybody move! Hold it right there! The fuse is out.

As Akamatsu repairs the fuse box, Asami reminds Sakura
and Keita to go to bed for Santa.

Asami: I see Santa’s sleigh flying out the casement,
and he’s not delivering any presents, because somebody’s
not in bed.

Akamatsu: Go on upstairs! Chop! Chop!

Keita, Hinoki and Sakura went upstairs for bed.

We see the group resting serenely.
Akamatsu is in his room sound asleep
in his pajamas, Asami is asleep also, in
a blue shirt and panties, Shou and Kaede
are asleep in the living room, Kaede is wearing
a pink t-shirt and socks, and Shou is asleep in his
white t-shirt and heart boxers, Keita, Hinoki and Sakura
are sound asleep too, Hinoki is wearing a fuchsia shirt
and socks, Sakura is wearing a nightgown, and Keita is
wearing his bunny pajamas.

December 24, 2004-
The next morning, it was all snowy.
And Hinoki woke up.

Hinoki: Wow…

Citry: *voice-over* It is finally Christmas
morning around here in Morehead. Look
at the nice sub-zero snowfall makes me
want to play outside, or just stay inside
and get warm.

Hinoki: Get up, Sakura.

Sakura: What time is it?

Hinoki: It’s time to open gifts.
C’mon, Kei-chan. Get up, Kei-chan.

The children scuttle out of bed, as the others look at
them.

Akamatsu: Merry Christmas!

Keita: I wanna play Santa! I wanna play Santa!

Akamatsu: Um… Keita you did it last year.
Yanagi, why don’t play Santa?

Shou: But how am I going to this bit?

Kaede: It’s simple, Shou. Just give Keita a present.

Keita: Yeah.

Kaede: Then we can rotate.

Keita: Gimme one, Yanagi! C’mon, Yanagi!

Then they open their gifts.

Asami: Keita, there is a present to you from your mother.

Keita: Oh… Whoopee a stealth blimp!

Akamatsu: A can of Simonize!

Asami: Keita, show everybody what you got from your mother.

Keita: *looks at the bunny suit* I don’t want to…

Citry: *voice-over* Keita’s mom had for years not only perpetually
labored under the hallucination that he was 4 years old, but
also a girl.

Asami: Keita, why don’t you try on that outfit?

Keita: I don’t want to!

Asami: Go upstairs, and try on that suit! Your mom
worked hard on that outfit, now go on!

Keita goes upstairs and tries on the bunny outfit.

Kaede: Here you go. And this is for Shou...

Kaede picks up a gift-wrapped bowling ball and plunges
it in Shou’s lap.

Kaede: Here, from me to you. 

Shou: *high-pitched* Thanks a lot! *normal voice*
Nice ball, thanks, Kaede. I got a little something for
you too.

Kaede: *glances at the perfume* Oh wow,
Lady Stenson. Thanks, Shou. *embraces him*
and this is for Akamatsu.

Akamatsu: No, no, you’re not tumbling that
ball on my lap.

Hinoki: Kei-chan, we’re waiting.

Keita: Aw, Hinoki!

Hinoki: Right now!

Keita comes downstairs in his bunny pajamas.

Shou: *laughs*

Keita: *inaudibly* Shut up, Yanagi.

Akamatsu: He looks like a disturbed Easter Bunny.

Asami: He does not!

Shou: *still amused* He does too; he looks like a pink nightmare!

Asami: You want to take it off?

Keita: *nods*

Akamatsu: Tell the kid to take it off.

Asami: You only wear it when your mom visits.
Take it off.

Akamatsu: Take it off!

Citry: *voice-over* Wait a second? Whatever happened to Whitey?
You’ll see… now.

In the porta-potty, Whitey does his job, as an 18-year-old
Adolescent vomits in the porta-potty. Let’s say his name
Ricky Livewire.

Whitey: You wake up in Dukesberry, you get
sick at Pukesberry.

Ricky: *gets ticked off, and at that moment he sprays Whitey
with the hose* Smell you later, Crapsicle. *laughs*

The deer stopped by to eat the crap covered old guy.

Meanwhile, at Conan’s house; Conan opens his
present, and got the rifle he required.

Conan: *surprised* Oh, wow! A rifle!
Can I try it out, Rachael?

Rachael: Are you sure? Those things
are dangerous. Conan, put on your
coat and boots, it is cold outside.

Richard Moore came in to check his daughter,
all intoxicated.

Richard: *drunk* Hey, Rach! *hiccup*

Rachael: Conan, your coat! Make sure you
Don’t shoot any animals or birds.

Richard: Except the evil Hellhounds!

Rachael: Oh Daddy… Be cautious, Conan.

Conan goes outside wearing his coat, boots
and pajamas ready to let off his rifle.

Conan: Okay, Black Bart… you acquire yours.
*pulls the elicit, then shot his eye out*

Back at Akamatsu’s house, Keita slumbers under
the tree. Then the Hillbillies’ evil dogs ate the Christmas
goose. Shou saw the whole thing, and next he grabbed
his gun and efforts to shoot one of the dogs.

Shou: Get out of here, you darn dogs!
*shoots again*

Akamatsu came into the kitchen.

Akamatsu: What’s going on?

Shou: The dogs are eating our Christmas goose!

Akamatsu: *snarls* Darn those hillbillies!

Kaede: What happened?

Asami: Oh, no. Our Christmas goose…

Akamatsu: Everybody upstairs and get dressed…
we are going out to eat.

At the Chinese café, Kitsune and Ryoko are
still drunk.

Citry: *voice-over* Now that those exasperating
Hellhounds ate their Christmas goose, they
and everybody else, including yours truly
went and comprised Christmas duck.

Waiters: *singing* Deck the halls with boughs of horry, ra ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra.

Kahn: No, no, not 'ra ra ra ra', 'la la la la'! Try again.

Waiters: Deck the halls with boughs of horry, ra ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra.

Kahn: No, no! Sing something else!

Waiters: Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh what fun it is to
ride in a one-horse open sreigh!

Akito: Every year those Chinese guys don’t get it right…

Jinto: Even though, they’re essentially from Laos.

Yurika Misumaru and Lafiel Abhriel came in.

Yurika: Akito! *embraces him to death*

Akito: Hey, Yurika. Gather around, we’re about
to have a quantity of Christmas duck.

Lafiel: Because of the Hillbillies’ dogs.

Jinto: Yep.

Citry Chance enters the scene.

Citry: Hey, guys! *smiles*

Naru: Citry, you’re here. Did you forget
about our 2nd anniversary jointly yesterday?

Citry: Nope.

Naru: Thanks, Citry.

Su: Don’t forget Vash’s anniversary with you
in two days.

Hibiki: *sigh* You can disregard about that one!

Vash: *drunk* Hey, shut up, Tokai!

Dita: *taps Hibiki* Here’s a present for you, Mr. Alien.

Hibiki: I’ll open it presently. *looks at Dita, all upset*
Okay. *opens the gift, and it is the exact gift he
got in that episode of Vandread*

Kitsune: *hums, then hugs Shinobu*
Shinobu, you cooked a nice duck.

Shinobu: Thank you… *laughs nervously*

Then the Magic Knights made it.

Citry: Hikaru! Umi! Fuu! I’m glad you made it.
You’re just in time for Christmas duck.

Hikaru: I’m looking forward to it.

Umi: Where is everyone?

Fuu: *points to the Chasers* Over there.

Then Whitey rushes in.

Whitey: Wait for Whitey!

Citry: Who encouraged you to our dinner!

Whitey: Me, Myself, and I.

Citry: *annoyed look* Well, tell your make-believe
friends to shut the frag up.

Ranma Saotome and Van Fanel walk in the café.

Citry: Merry Christmas, Ranma-chan. Lord Van.

Van: Thanks, Citry.

Ranma: How are you?

Citry: I’m fine. Kane and Ricky are doing
their Christmas song any minute.

Ryoko comes up to them.

Ryoko: Yeah, pull up a chair, and relax.

Van: Okay…

Ranma: Sure, I’ll play for them.

Kahn announces another song for the night.

Kahn: Lady and gentleman, welcome Kane
Blueriver and Ricky Livetire!

Ricky: It’s pronounced “Livewire!”

Kane: Let’s not worry about it, Rickster.

Ricky: Okay…

Kane: We’re going to sing “Last Christmas” by Wham!
I’ll handle the verses, you do the chorus.

Ricky: Great plan, Kane; I’m an appalling singer anyways.

The music starts playing, with Citry on keyboard, Kane
on guitar and vocals, Ranma on guitar, Xelloss on bass
guitar, Akito on drums, and Ricky on vocals.

Ricky: *singing* Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special...

Kane: *singing* Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance
But you still catch my eye
Tell me baby
Do you recognize me?
Well It's been a year
It doesn't surprise me

Ricky: Happy Christmas.

Kane: *singing* I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love you" I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now
I know you'd fool me again

Ricky: *singing* Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special...

Kane: *singing* A crowded room
Friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you
And your soul of ice
My God I thought you were
Someone to rely on Me?
I guess I was a shoulder to cry on
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man under cover but you tore me apart
Now I've found a real love you'll never fool me again

Ricky: *singing* Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special...

Kane: *singing* A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man under cover buy you tore him apart
Maybe next year I'll give it to someone
I'll give it to someone special.

Both: *singing* Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special...

Everyone claps their hands.

Kane: Shou, I believe it’s your turn to sing.

Shou: Okay.

Shou and Kaede get up on stage.

Shou: *singing* Silent night, Holy night
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon Virgin Mother and Child
Holy Infant so tender and mild
Sleep in Heavenly peace
Sleep in Heavenly peace

Kaede: *singing* Silent night, Holy night
Shepherds quake at the sight
Glories stream from Heaven afar
Heavenly hosts sing Hallelujah
Christ, the Savior is born
Christ, the Savior is born

Both: *singing* Silent night, Holy night
Son of God, love’s pure light
Radiant beams from thy Holy face
With the dawn of redeeming grace
Jesus, Lord, at thy birth
Jesus, Lord, at thy birth

Shou: Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Shou Yanagi, I’m 20-years-old,
here to inform you about Christmas. Christmas isn't about presents, carols
and Santa Claus. It's the birth of Jesus Christ... It's a time for us to consider
how much God loves us. The spirit of Christmas comes from within our
hearts, with the love and care we have for our family and friends. It is
something we should always keep within us all year around and esteem
exceedingly. Never forget this...

Everyone claps for the duet.

Edward: *wipes a tear from his eye* That’s
so beautiful…

Alphonse: *sniff* I know… you want
some Pepsi Holiday Spice?

Edward: Yeah. *drinks the Pepsi*
Hey, this isn’t bad. Thanks, Al.

Alphonse: You’re welcome, Ed. Merry
Christmas.

Edward: Thanks, Al. Merry Christmas
to you too.

Kahn: And now, the Anime Chasers will
sing you one last song. All of the Chasers
stepped up on stage for their first recital.
*to Edward* That include you, Shorty.

Edward: *gets ticked* Why you! Don’t you
EVER call me “Shorty!”

Alphonse: Easy, Ed…

The group commences to perform.

All: Hark! The Herald angels sing
Glory to the newborn king.
Peace on earth and mercy mild,
God and sinners reconciled.
Joyful all ye nations rise.
Join the triumph of the skies.
Hark! The Herald angels sing,
Glory to the newborn king!

Everyone claps their hands.

All: We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year.

Kane: Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin;
Good tidings for Christmas
And a happy New Year!

All: We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year.

Daisuke: Good tidings we bring
wherever you are
Good tidings for Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Paper Sisters: We want some figgy pudding
We want some figgy pudding
We want some figgy pudding
Please bring it right here!

Ricky: Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin;
Good tidings for Christmas
*sighs* This bites…
And a happy New Year!

Shou+Kaede: Good tidings we bring
wherever you are
Good tidings for Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Ryoko: We won't go until we get some
We won't go until we get some
We won't go until we get some
So bring it out here! *hiccups*

Yomiko: Glad tidings we bring
To you and your kin;
Glad tidings for Christmas
And a happy New Year!

All: We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Citry: We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Everyone claps their hands again.

Citry: Merry Christmas! Peace out!

December 25, 2004-
At midnight, the Chasers sleep peacefully
with their Christmas presents.

Then the credits played an instrumental version of “We Wish you a Merry Christmas”
followed by “Jingle Bells”

Announcer: Anime Christmas 2004 has been brought to you by... by some things...
right, right over there! Goodnight, everybody!

Whitey turns off the TV.

Whitey: Hope you enjoyed our presentation of Citry’s LJ entry.

Citry comes in the scene.

Citry: So, that’s where my LJ entry went you little monster!
You confiscated it from me, you bushy diminutive thief!

Whitey: Gotta go!

Citry: Oh, no you don’t!

Citry pursues after Whitey.

THE END.