The cold morning greets Chamelion, in green T-shirt
and shorts, as he opens the main window
of the cabin he’s chosen to rent for the week, while staying close to the
“Simplicity. Perhaps a better way to go? I spent a lot of time concerned about how to
best deliver my arguments, presentation and interest and in the end, perhaps
simplicity will achieve greater results.
Why take three left turns when one right turn will suffice, hmm? Admittedly my last couple shots at this took
a bit more out of me then I’d have liked, so I’ll dispense the creative choose
your own adventure aspect, and just get on with it.”
Turning, Chamelion points out a bulletin
board we’d not seen before and pins a six by two inch laminated sheet to the
top of the board which reads Eliminator.
It’s another visual, as Kirlia would point out, but its no more then a
simple introduction to each of his competitors.
“Well,
Eliminator, where do I begin? You’re
angry with me, right? Angry because I questioned the legitimacy of the events
unfolding in your world? Can you really
blame me for wondering if what you had going on was a ploy, or not? Face it, any man who can even think of a
wrestling match when his wife has been supposedly killed by unknown forces, isn’t
a man or moral fiber. I know I’d be
devastated, but you? Not long after her death you’re cutting a promo, talking
about your opponents in turn, and going off on a tangent because I wondered if
this was a real situation or just a way to garner the sympathy vote of the BWF
fans. It didn’t help your case any,
kiddo, when you chose to handle things on your own and not get the police
involved. Police, I might add, obligated by law to progress with a rescue
mission themselves. No, you went in,
gung ho and people died, and when it was over, you’re safe at home with your
wife, discussing your soon to be match in the Elimination Chamber? Pretty pathetic indeed.”
He shakes his head, wondering why some people
would go so far as to present their personal life for all to see when it’s so
tragic. What do they hope to gain out of sharing the devastation of their
hearts, and why, above all else; do they put aside so important a thing to try
to win a match?
“You may
be upset with me, Eliminator, but you are just one of five, all who have some
beef with me in one form or another, or just want to be the one to put me down
for the 1-2-3, but if you allow your focus to be so narrow that you forget
that, you might find yourself done for, before you get a real chance at me. Even if you do, you’re going to be in for a
surprise or three. Everyone here is
commenting on my career, one way or another, and comparing it to a glorified
mid card success, which could be more insulting to the people I’ve faced then
to me. Legend, Sirus, Clark, Executioner,
as I have named off before, would likely not enjoy the mid card
comparisons. XTC, goes into recovery
after having accepted my challenge and in case anyone’s missed it, actually did
pin me in that ring for a
It’s true, Chamelion has faced far better
competition then these guys want to give him credit for, and just because he
has yet to maintain an upper tier presence has no bearing on the fact that he
is as good, if not better, then the majority of the so called ‘main
eventers’. It’s just another reason in
the ever growing list of why Chamelion needs to win this match. Once this hurdle is cleared, no one would
dare doubt him again.
“Everyone
of you has attempted to discredit me, because you know deep down that
individually, any one of you I could defeat with a ‘Snap’, and if not for the
complexity of this six person encounter, I’d do so. Perhaps then, you’d honor me with the credit
of being at the top of the mountain, or you could turn around and lower
yourselves just to save face, I truly don’t know. Actually, perhaps I do, since you commented
that I took the title from Toxic at his worst, yet I wasn’t the one who
floundered in the end, it was him. And turn on XTC, I don’t know where you got
that idea, I can’t turn on a guy I’m not friends with to begin with. Honestly, where you come up with some of this
shit surprises me to no end.”
Taking a moment to drown the rest of the
water, Chamelion turns and pins a second name onto the bulletin board, this one
below Eliminator that reads Ice Hensley.
He grins as he looks at the name, remembering how Ice greeted his last
work, and questions how anyone in this federation gets by on utilizing the
dirty word dictionary. Perhaps Ice and
Legend could team up and call themselves NC-17!
“Icehouse
Hensley. Did you enjoy your hearty
laugh, is it out of your system now?
Good, cause you’ll need to wipe your eyes clean and open your ears to
listen to me very carefully. I can only
respond to the words you say, and how you say them and when you said Chamelion
and Kirlia are in matches and they decided to book us three, you leave little
room for interpretation. In fact, you
talk so fast you tend to leave a lot of the good stuff out to begin with. Likely explains why you go back and add
later, when no one’s looking, just to feel you out witted someone with your
half assed speech. Hell, I tried to
cover your ass for you, a little bit, but if you really don’t believe in DVD
additions, then what else was it? A
cheap way to fatten yourself up? I think
the beer will do that for you.”
He sighs then, just a hair’s breath,
reflecting on the fact that there’s so many wrestlers in the BWF who think
drinking a lot of beer on screen is some sort of amazing gimmick. I think Stone Cold has that angle covered
quite nicely and the likes of Ice, Toxic, Clark and Cross would do well to
focus on something else, something that could be beneficial to their in career
record, not their bar record.
“I
wonder if name calling is your greatest power, because you wield that and
random insults like a precious weapon.
Too bad I wound deeper with a paper cut, otherwise I might have felt a
twinge of irritation. Never been too
much into taking offense with people’s descriptions of my wife or I, since
we’re above the petty squabbling that results from it. Anyhow, onward; do I really need to waste my
time going over the differences of our careers?
If I don’t, people will think I concurred with you, and if I do, it
could get repetitious, and heaven forbid I get blamed for THAT!”
Repetition - the occurrence of an event which
has occurred before. Examples – Five
challengers to Chamelion all saying ‘I’m going to beat you” or “I’m going to
end your winning streak.” Or, even
better, “Chamelion, stop being repetitious.”
Yeah, takes one to know one, dumbasses.
Snickering at his thought, Chamelion shrugs as he continues.
“Oh
well, I guess it can’t be helped. You’re
behind me now, kiddo, never said you always were. Yeah, you’ve held titles here I have yet to
challenge for, but the cliché’ often used is something along the lines of
losing as many titles as one wins and I think it’s a bit OBVIOUS that I had
help to win the tag team titles, since they are in fact, a group effort. Hall of Fame, I suppose if you want the quick
way in, sure, but when I get there, it’ll be from hard work and perseverance,
and as for undisputed? No, here I have
not had the opportunity to be declared the Undisputed champion of the BWF. Now, Undisputed Champion of the PWA, RJW,
PHWF and SWF? That I did and when Sunday’s over, I can add the BWF’s Undisputed
Reign to my list. Still, if you want to
narrow your focus on the past, and not consider the present and future, that’s
your call. I have a few more to worry
about then that.”
Expectantly, he picks up and pins the name
Rob Torborg onto the board, below that of Ice Hensley. Yeah, if people are catching on, Chamelion is
posting these names on a level concurrent with his opinions on their chances in
this match. Torborg is the weakest link
in this match, Good Bye.
“Guess
I’d better turn my attention back to Rob Torborg for a moment, since he insists
he’s a threat in this match. Compared to
the challenge of Cody Clark and Captain Marticus, I’m surprised you’re putting
in this much effort. For a while now,
things have not been progressing well for you, huh? A loss to me, twice, losing out at Wrestle
Bowl and then Captain Marticus making you tap?
Must be a bit nerve racking for ya, kiddo, and I saw your break down
when you ranted to Marticus following Monday.
I suspect we’ll see another one come next Monday, and it should be a
doozy! By the way, you’re a bit lucky I
didn’t come into Wrestle Bowl and cost you the chance myself, and yeah, the
thought had occurred to me.”
Heck, he’d actually contacted the GLWA about
coming in just to do that and they said they’d get back to him. They never did, and in the end, Chamelion
felt he could best humiliate Torborg in the very ring he thinks he’s best in. Yet Torborg really believes he’s the one to
do it all, win the Chamber match, become undisputed champion and end
Chamelion’s streak.
“It’s
getting interesting, listening to each and every one of you claim to be the one
to end my streak. I’m actually getting
sick of my streak because it’s getting so much attention that it seems to be
taking some of the glory from me! I can
see it now, Mr. Winning Streak running around with Chamelion in his shadow,
sheesh. Still, this poses an interesting
concept; what if everyone is so determined to be the one to beat me, they end
up fighting in the end and allow me a few easy pins. If self glory is going to be that important
to any and all of you, I may just have this match won. Fact is, not one of you is any more important
to me then another, and while some of you I’d prefer more then others, in the
end I’ll try and beat each of you equally.”
Whatever strategies each of them are
developing, Chamelion has a simple one. Win.
Sure, it’s cliché and very simple, but that’s the basis of this;
simplicity. Simply tell each of them
where they screwed up and point them in the right direction. It’s not that hard, even if they can’t grasp
the concept.
“Torby,
it makes sense to retreat when the chips are down if you feel it’s your only
course, but I seem to remember a Reloaded not too long ago when you did the
same thing to one of our wrestling divas.
You back peddled out of the ring as fast as you could, looking pleased
with your amazing prowess, and I was left to wonder how you ever accomplish
anything, or have any fan support, when all we ever see is your ass as you run
off? Many men have an ego going into
these things, but I think you actually killed an ego and you’re wearing it as a
second skin. Piece of advice, kiddo,
wash it; it smells.”
This time, when he selects the next name,
that of Captain Marticus, he pins it above Eliminator. While Eliminator may have the emotional
launch going into the Chamber, he still pales in comparison to the intricate
and unusual presentation of Captain Marticus.
Chamelion knows that of all of the men in this match, Marticus is the
most entertaining, if not a bit off the mark.
“I think
Marticus is a little confused, but that’s okay.
I know how ‘dreams’ and ‘fantasies’ work in promos, I’ve done them
myself a few times, I just simply stated it was running it’s course with you,
in my opinion, cause I felt perhaps it was the only method you knew, and you
played off of it well by mocking my recent work, but it didn’t have the kick
some of your earlier one’s had, sorry.
Then you wonder why after my lead in I went fully into discussing you
and the others and refrained from doing anything else? Really, I wonder what the big deal is with
people having to mime what they’re saying or eat a snack, drink, or be
somewhere with a large number of people when what they really want to do is
trash their opponents work? I was nice
enough to have that lead in, a little background and share a bit of my personal
life, but in the end; all that mattered was discussing my challengers, and that
doesn’t require a bow and ribbon.”
Yet, here Chamelion goes with offering a
smile, a nod, even taking a drink of water to satisfy the masses need to watch
Chamelion do something physical.
Voyeurism in the BWF? Who’d have thought? But thirsty he is, and the water tastes good.
Capping it, he resumes.
“Saying
I want to do a similar situation is not the same as DOING a similar situation,
Marty, and I certainly didn’t come out swinging a mug and carrying on, so you
wasted a little breath there, I believe.
Since you mentioned the Gauntlet Run, sure it wasn’t a win, but it’s not
like I was pinned, submitted, in a one on one or for that matter, even cared
about it, and suffice it to say, I asked the BWF committee what it’s considered
and they commented that it doesn’t affect my career, nor that of anyone else
who loses them, so, for the moment I’m safe on that!”
It was important that Chamelion understood
the BWF’s position on how to score his record, and seeing as how he offered to
fill an empty position in the match just to surprise some people, the general consensus
at the time was that it wouldn’t count against his streak. Now, today, with the way things have been
going, he wishes it did, and then no one.. no one at all, could lay claim to
taking away his winning streak, and that would apparently eat away at some of
them.
“To
avoid too much repetitiveness, please refer to my earlier comments about XTC,
thank you, and even so with my tag team reigns, as there have been some pretty
good challenges. Absolute Zero was a
throw away, but I didn’t hear these complaints when he went against Blazenwing
in a video game match, which leads me to say that hypocrisy knows no bounds. At least I gave the rookie a chance, where no
one else would, and that’s what makes a champion great; opportunity. I also don’t care about your worthless
defense of why you lost to Toxic, because he whooped your ass in and out of the
ring and I’d hate to hear any excuse about you being stuck somewhere the week
before, since in retrospect, you had THREE weeks in which to prepare for Toxic,
as he was named number one contender the first Havok after you won your
title. I’d chalk it up to being
overwhelmed and while I may indeed fail Sunday, you are the man who held the
title one month and lost it because you wouldn’t get on the ball in time. Oh, and don’t try to deny the importance of
our verbal warfare. If it wasn’t
important, then why are you even doing so now, and for that matter, much earlier
then you’re known for? Fact is, while
our skills win or lose us the match, it’s our voice that either earns or loses
the respect of our peers, and the more we do here, to rile each other up,
results in a much better encounter.
Still, you’re correct, it’s all in the quality of our arguments,
that garners said respect, but by
admitting that, are you not making a point in my favor, compared to the very
thing you tried to deny; the importance of these promos? See, sometimes you talk so much, you gab yourself
into a corner, way to go, kiddo!”
The last name goes up, and I do mean UP, as
Cody Clark is placed on the top of the five names, representing the common
belief that his chances are more solid then most, and even Chamelion is willing
to abide by those feelings.
“Finally,
Cody Clark, the new BWF Champion. Maybe
I’ll just toss my hands up now and say ‘good show, you win’ and call it a
day. I mean, since everyone else has
declared I have five targets on my chest, why not just expect the same of you
and also concede that you made excellent points and tore me in half. Or, we could go with Marty’s belief that no
matter what we say, it’s how we perform in the ring that counts. If we went that direction, then this match is
most certainly mine, since well, I’ve always preformed at my best and come out
sparkling. Still in the end, I’ll go
with my believe, and say that the reason we all sprout off at the mouth so
often is because it motivates us, and the best one to speak his part, likely
will feel the most confidence going into the match, and likely gain an
advantage… and perhaps the win.”
Besides, it’s not easy to flash through a
promo when there are five talented opponents to defend against, and anyone who
gets bored or tired watching one of Chamelion’s works either isn’t aware of
true artistry, or just forgot they can pause and come back later. Then again, maybe
“You are
indeed, the underdog in this match but that could very well be your biggest
asset. However, you made one error in
suggesting I’m over looking anyone in this match, since I happen to have been
the only one willing to come out and talk about people who’d not even made it
in, with the honest idea any of them could.
Hell, I wonder if I didn’t subconsciously give Torborg his chance when
that one bowling pin didn’t fall. I
certainly wouldn’t have pegged him a member of this match in the beginning, but
I’ve seen miracles before, this one is no less amazing. As for talking of my streak, yeah it gets
mentioned a lot, but lately it’s all come out of the mouths of everyone else,
when they say they want to be the one who ends it. I’m actually at peace losing this match
because the weight of maintaining such a record will be gone, and yeah, like it
or not, I will have the reasoning that it took five of the best in this company
to gain up on me to get the job done.
Any one of you would do the same, and it’s best not to deny it, because
in truth, it’s a rather damned good excuse to lose a match, when multiple opponents
aim to take you out at once. Very few
people I know in my entire life could stand against five and survive, but when
those five include those in the Chamber, the chances dwindle even more.”
Name someone who doesn’t back themselves up,
puff their chest up and take pride in their accomplishments? It’s a shame people will showcase their own
talents while subsequently ignoring every little thing someone else has
done. Chamelion is aware he has not
always faced the greatest BWF wrestlers, but unlike most, he didn’t come here
expecting too. There’s a ladder, you
see, and Chamelion knows where the bottom rung is.
“As for
the people nagging me about repeating myself, you present your latest piece of
work in two parts; the self analysis part where you review who you’re facing
and mention that we’ve faced twice before and I’ve never pinned you, or that
it’s a self sense of accomplishment for me… then when you actually speak TO me,
it comes to us again that you comment on how our matches ended, and that maybe
I’ve been pointing them out a bit much.
Now, I’m not saying what you’ve done is BAD, cause that would just come
back on me, but really, you presented the argument in the same breath you
demonstrated it. Hell, come on, Kiddo,
who here has NOT pointed out their victories, their accomplishments? Who here has not made absolutely sure that
everyone in the BWF is aware of what they’ve succeeded at? So far, all day as I’ve watched everyone’s
comments against me, I really have only heard the exact same argument presented
to me from five different mouths and if anyone here wants to be sick of the repetitiveness,
it’s me.”
That may have been what slowed Chamelion
down, because every time he saw a new promo, he realized it was entirely the
same as the last one, no matter who recorded it. At least, in terms of talking about
Chamelion, since he kind of didn’t care much about the rest of them. He had his own views to give, and didn’t want
his thoughts contaminated with the rantings of the other members. Taking a long drink, Chamelion reflects on
that and then continues.
“Hell,
some of them have commented on me making excuses for where I am. I faced jobbers, I didn’t have a challenge,
blah this, blah that. Whatever, now
you’re making an excuse about Wrestle Fest III, that you were not at your
best? It wasn’t just Wrestlefest, Cody,
but there’d been times before that I’d commented on an interest to face you,
but each time I was ignored. The two
times we met, yeah, you lost, and no you were not pinned but you also couldn’t
accomplish the simple feat of protecting your partners from the same fate. It comes around on me, as well, because
neither you nor I need to pin each other to win or lose this match…you could
come in last, after I’d been defeated by one of the others and then what? Do
you claim to have won over Chamelion?
Vice versa, I win but someone else pins you? Do I claim 3-0 against you? It’s a matter of perspective, but from you I
would expect a level of decorum and deny any involvement should it fall that
way, otherwise you destroy your one and only defense against me concerning your
losses.”
For kicks, Chamelion slides another laminated
sheet out from hiding and pins Chamelion above all five competitors, and he beams
his
“In
closing, if no one’s fallen asleep yet, heh, I’ll leave you all with a word of
advice; dispense with the target on me, or the claim of being the one to end my
streak, and just accept that if it does happen, only one of you is going to be
able to make that claim. Do you all want
it bad enough to risk losing the match?
Do you all really think it’s that important? I’m in there to win the United Championships and
nothing else matters, especially any of you.. Oh, and one last thing, Clark, IT is the E-Bay
campaign, and GOT IT, well, that’s my catch phrase, kind of like a verbal exclamation point…and umm, heh, since I
already said it once, I’ll be kind and not repeat myself!”
So there you have it. As Chamelion slips off the stool and grabs
his gym bag to take a shower, he gives us a final smile before shutting the
door behind him. He’s done what he
could, for the sake of himself and the fans of the BWF.
Simplicity.
Yes, that’s the way to go.
END