Chapter 5
Lucius
So long ago, so many years. I’ve lost track of how long I’ve been alive, if you can even say that I’m alive. Everyone dies but who do you know that has died three times already and wonders if there’s a fourth? Sometimes I wonder if I have existed for too long, it’s times like those that I fall into a state of depression which ultimately results in the long sleep from which I never wish to awaken but I always seem to find myself drawn up from it, out of the peaceful bliss of oblivion into the searing pain of an eternal existence. Always ending up alive, once again forced to feed. The last time I slept I was awakened by the knowledge that I had to protect my children, only to find that there remained one of my children, the others had been destroyed. Cian remained, I would not lose him. I had forced him to remain with me until I had seen the desire to leave grow to such extremes that I couldn’t stand to force him to stay. I released him from the nest, tossed him to the winds, not knowing where he would go or what he would do.
Shaking my head I held Cian closer to my body, pressing his bare skin against the silk of my shirt. He shuddered against me as I began to brush my lips across his throat and shoulders. I chuckled as I gave his body the pleasure that it so richly deserved. He reached his climax quickly, once he did I allowed him to rest as I debated whether to continue with my ministrations or end them. I decided that he had suffered enough at my hands. I would bring him clothing and we would depart in search of the ones who were killing our kind. Tilting his head back he looked up at me, a look of complete relaxation and pleasure upon his face.
“What is it my prince?” I asked softly.
He half closed his eyes as he spoke, “Thank you.”
“It is nothing.” I said with an absent wave of my hand, “Time for us to go. Come on, get up.”
Slowly he stumbled to his feet, still weak from the pleasuring I had given him. I stood before setting about getting him the finery that he deserved. Dressing him in silks, velvets, and satins we prepared to leave.
“Why have you brought me here? Where are the others?” He asked as I braided his hair.
“The others are sleeping else where, someplace safer than here. I brought you back to the beginning, back to where it all began.” I said as I continued to braid his silky locks.
He scowled, “That doesn’t answer why you brought me.”
“It answers it but you must search within the words for what you seek.” I said as I tied his black hair with a piece of scarlet silk.
He wasn’t satisfied with my answer, “I don’t care about the beginning, that has come and gone. All that is left is the future.”
I half smiled, “Exactly. Without the past there is no future. You must go forward before you can go back but there must be something to go back to. You began here then left but now we begin again, a new journey. We have returned to the place of your birth so that we may start again.”
Cian was still not pleased but he was satisfied for the time being. It was time for us to leave, to go in search of the murderers. I wished that Cian had the abilities that I did, especially able to travel during the daylight hours, to be able to withstand the light of the sun for short periods of time. It didn’t really matter though; I needed his power, his skill. When he was properly prepared I took his arm and we departed. The night was young, beautiful, as we walked through the cool desert. There was a sadness upon his face. I would not read his thoughts because he could not read mine, it was an unfair advantage. I would not ask him what was troubling him, I would wait for a time, it could wait, everything could wait for my dear one, my Cian. Suddenly he stopped, causing me to release my loose grip on his arm. I turned to find him looking up at the moon, full in its round orb. The stars sparkled like shimmering pools of icy water. Gently I lay a hand on his shoulder, not pulling him anywhere, just as a small piece of comfort. He placed his hand upon my own as he continued to stare at the sky.
“Cian.” I whispered in his ear, “What’s wrong?”
He shook his head, “Nothing.” He whispered, “Nothing.”
I scowled, “Tell me.” I whispered, “Tell me what is troubling you.”
He sighed and closed his eyes, “I’ve been thinking…” He trailed off; I waited patiently for him to continue, “What if you had never taken me from my home, what if you had never come for me?”
I shook my head, “But I did come for you, I did take you away. Nothing is going to change that, I did what I did, I came, and now, you are mine, as you have been for thousands of years.” I laughed softly.
“What if someone changed it? What if someone went back and changed it all?”
“Nothing can change the past. I would know if it were possible. I have been alive for a very long time. More than double your own age. There is no way to change what has been done, you know that just as well as I do.” My voice was quick and calm, almost annoyed. I didn’t mean to sound that way but there was nothing I could do to take it back.
He bowed his head, “Lucius.” He said after a moment of silence, “I’m scared.”
“There is nothing to be frightened of, I will not allow anything to happen to you. You are my only child that is left alive.” I said softly.
“Then why didn’t you just leave me asleep.” He spat, his voice showing his anger.
“I could have. Would you have preferred it if I had? If I had forced you to remain in the long sleep, the sleep full of dreams?” I said crossly, “Would you really like that to happen?”
He glared at me, head still bowed, “I don’t want to dream but if you wanted to keep me safer you would have left me asleep and with the others.”
“No, they are safer asleep but your power would not allow you to stay safe for long, it would jeopardize you and the others.” I said, my voice short and angry, “Even if I did keep you asleep they would find you. You cannot stay hidden forever, no one can. Until this is dealt with your child and his children will be safe. You must trust me. They will be safe.”
“I don’t believe you. I wonder if you truly are going to be keeping them safe or if you’re just going to keep me for yourself. I know that you can. I know that you could force me to remain with you for all time. Tell me the truth, tell me what your true intentions are.” He growled.
I smiled, “My intentions are just as I have told you. I intend to keep your child safe until this is over. After that he is on his own. You shall remain with me.” I said, eyes flashing, “We shall destroy the two that have been killing our kind, from there you and I shall be on our way. There is something that I wish to show you, a place that I wish to take you, but I can only do so after this is over.”
He took in a deep breath, “I still do not believe you. I don’t believe that you want to keep them safe. Perhaps you wish them to die so that there will be nothing to come between us.”
We stood face to face in the darkness. A cool breeze began to blow the sand over our leather boots as we stood silently in the desert. His eyes flashed with anger, not believing that I was telling him the truth. I looked into his eyes, the moon reflecting in their violet beauty. I wanted him to believe me, wanted him to know that I was telling the truth, that I didn’t lie to him. I did want to keep his child safe because he wanted him safe. I would keep Cian for myself but I would not cause him mental anguish by destroying his child.
“Why have you always told me one thing and meant another?” He asked softly, “Why have you never told me the full truth?”
“At this time I am telling you the truth. You are too old to be coddled and babied, too old to be treated as a child, kept from the full truth. I refuse to lie to you, to pretend that you are still a youth. To me you are, you are still a child, my child but I am not going to lie to you. I am not going to keep the truth from you.” I spat, “I have no reason to lie to you. I will not lie to you. I am not holding anything back. I am telling you the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. You never listened to me; you never paid attention to what I tried to teach you. You were always spoiled, I gave you everything, never expected anything in return. I made you what you are, I attempted to teach you all that I knew, but you never paid attention to the knowledge that I held, you never wanted to know anything that was beyond your perfect little world that I created, that I formed for you, that I gave to you.” I was angry at his insolence, “Why is it that you always wanted for yourself? Why is it that you never cared about other people, except in the beginning when you refused to feed? Answer me, Cian, why?” I demanded.
He was speechless, he didn’t know what to say, “I…” His mouth snapped shut as he tried to figure things out. I waited for his answer, “I don’t know.” He said softly, unsure of himself.
“But you do know. The answer to my questions lies within your sordid little brain.” I said, tapping on his temple.
He scowled, “I just haven’t been able to understand myself. I didn’t want to listen; I didn’t want to pay attention to you because I didn’t think that you had the right to tell me what to do. I just felt as though you were not in the right when you kidnapped me. Even though I said that I wanted to understand everything I guess I really didn’t want to. You gave me everything and I gave you nothing in return for your sacrifices save a lot of trouble.” He said softly, “I just never truly wanted to understand. I just didn’t want to…” He stopped to look back up at the sky, “I never listened, even when I was a mortal. No matter what people told me I always did what I wanted to do, only doing the things that I wished to. I never knew what I was going to do. I always thought that I was going to continue to live a nomadic life, remain with my family, start one of my own.” He said as he began to count the stars, “There are so many.” He said softly, “There are thousands upon thousands. Will I live as long as there are stars in the sky, will the world even be around that long?”
I shook my head, “We will be here as long as the world is for I shall not allow you to be taken from me.” I said softly, “Tell me something.” I said, “Do you truly wish to remain with me or are you only doing this as a temporary request?”
“I don’t know.” He said honestly, “I honestly don’t know whether or not I want to stay with you or remain on my own.”
I sighed, “You know that I can make you stay and I will if you don’t chose to remain.” I said with quiet earnest, “I will not be defied.”
His eyes widened in surprise. I had never told him that I would force him to remain, never said that no matter what his choice was if I didn’t like it I would force him into the one that I wanted for him. He was in complete shock at the surety I was displaying, the fire in my eyes that said I would not allow him to come to harm and he would remain with me. Taking a step back he held up his hands. He was panicking, I could feel it. I matched his steps as he continued to walk back. Quickly my hand shot out and I grabbed the back of his neck. Drawing him close I held his face right before mine.
“Do not push me, Cian.” I said before kissing him. My icy lips upon his, pressing hard against him, “Do not defy me.” I said as I drew back, “Never, defy me.”
His eyes flashed in terror at my show, “I’m sorry.” He whispered, “I shall not defy you.”
“Good.” I said, releasing him, “Let’s go.”
He was shaking as we continued our trek across the desert. He followed right behind me; head down, matching my every step. I hadn’t meant to scare him as badly as I did but I had had enough. I was tired of his recklessness and wild spirit. He needed to learn what he should have learned centuries ago. I would not put up with Cian’s stupidity any longer; I was putting my foot down.
“Come, walk beside me.” I said softly. Slowly he came to walk next to me, “I am sorry for snapping at you but I was attempting to get my point across, you just pushed me too far.” I told him, slowly calming down, “I want you to understand, I don’t want to lose you.”
Cian bowed his head, “I know that you don’t want to see anything happen to me but I want to live my own life. I don’t want to leave you but I believe that I should have a choice.” He was afraid of me.
“No more choices.” I said sternly, “No more.” I brought my hand through the air before me as a signal of finality.
He scowled, “Fine.” He spat, “But it just isn’t right.”
I chuckled, “There is no right or wrong any more, there is only the truth that comes from within. You know exactly what I mean.”
“I’m sure.”
“Don’t speak to me like that.” Before I knew what I was doing I slapped him hard across the face.
He blinked, “Why did you do that?” He asked softly.
“I’ve had just about enough of your sass.” I spat, “We must go on. Reach the town before daylight.”
He stood staring at me for a moment before rushing to catch up. Not another word passed between us as we made our way towards a small town in the desert. A town that Cian had spent much of his life in, feeding, trading, bartering, with the people but never a part of it. Always traveling on, living the nomadic life that he had been raised to. I, on the other hand, had lived a life of luxury. As much luxury as could be achieved nine thousand years ago. I enjoyed my human life but in the end was glad to be rid of it. The first one, the one who began all of this, created me. I never asked her how she came into existence; I just didn’t find it proper to do so. After a few thousand years she left me, left me to find my own way. She had taught me much but I never discovered how we came to be. I haven’t seen her since she left, I miss her, I wish that I could find her but I am content with my life, the life that she gave to me.
Cian looked at me in contempt as we entered the town. I waved him away with a motion of my hand. I was beginning to hunger. Although I am so old that I do not have to feed, it is still a comfort, a constant. Cian’s expression told me that he too hungered. I half smiled as I looked at him, knowing that we were not here to feed but to find one of my human pets. Sven, a young man who I found in Russia a few years before, was who we were here to see. I knew where to find him. I had given him all that he needed to live here in great comfort. A home, all the money that he needed, things that were easy for me to give. I favored him, hoped that one day I could bring him into our world, show him what life was truly about. I found him right where I expected him to be. Lounging in the parlor of the beautiful home I had given to him. His eyes were closed in peaceful sleep. His slender form was draped in a chair, looking rather graceful in all of his human life. Cian looked confused as to what we were doing here. I held up a hand, telling him to stay put, before approaching Sven’s sleeping form. Tapping his shoulder I kneeled down next to him. He mumbled something as he rolled off the chair. He landed with a soft thud on the floor but didn’t awaken.
“Sven.” I said softly, laying my hand on his shoulder, “Wake up, Sven.”
“Leave me alone.” He said softly, his lips barely moving.
I sighed, “Sven, wake up. There is something that I need you to do for me.”
He rolled over, “I don’t know who you are so just leave me alone.”
“Sven, you know very well who I am.” I said before biting my wrist, holding it to his mouth I forced him to drink.
His eyes snapped open as he swallowed once. Struggling away he pulled himself back into the chair, “I’m sorry Master. I was up all last night and today.” He said softly, “What is it that you want me to do?”
I smiled, “Deliver a letter.” I said simply as he wiped the blood from the side of his face.
“Alright, I’ll take it.” Sven said softly, “But before I do can I have another taste?”
I chuckled, “What? One wasn’t good enough for you?”
He bowed his head, “I’m sorry, I guess I overstepped my bounds.”
“No, that’s alright. You don’t get another one though, not until you deliver this for me.” I said pulling out an envelope sealed with red wax and imprinted with my personal seal.
He took it from me carefully, “Who do you want me to deliver this to?”
“One of my kind, his name is Remy. I’m sure that you will be able to find him, you managed to find me. It wasn’t too difficult for you, you seem to be able to find anyone you set your mind to so I’m sure that finding Remy and his human companion will not be too hard.” I said with a smile.
“No problem.” He said tucking the envelope safely in the inside pocket of his coat, “What do you want me to do once I find him and give him your letter?”
“Return to me with his answer, if he has one, if not then just return. I look forward to your return. When you get back you can have another drink.”
“Alright. I’ll be back in a few days. Where do you want me to meet you?”
“Here is fine.” I said, “I shall see you soon.”
He bowed slightly before leaving the house. When he was gone I turned to Cian who had been watching the proceedings. His arms were crossed over his chest and he was leaning against the wall.
“Who was that and why exactly did we come to see him?” He asked softly.
“That was one of my human servants, Sven. He is going to deliver a letter to the one that has been killing our kind. I would go myself but, well, I don’t think that would really be a good idea.” I said with a smile.
“So, we’re going to wait here until he comes back?” Cian asked as he walked to the chair Sven had been sleeping in.
I nodded as he sat down, “Yes. We shall await his answer, if he has one to give.”
“What was in that letter?”
I smiled, “That’s for me to know and you to find out, when he returns.”