Posted by d'art [dart] on November 14, 1999 at 18:58:15 {fiuUEQ5dxUcEYSrgHrs6ysjyIE.NIE}:
In Reply to: **HOSTILITY posted by ToAll...PlzRead on November 14, 1999 at 15:55:47:
: anger is part of that process yet they get on
you for it instead of understanding it. Do you see what i mean?
I used to have a very bad temper, very bad. It helped me tremendously to learn that anger is a secondary emotion (a result of another emotion like grief). At that point I was able to get a handle on my temper, somewhat, and deal with the real issues at hand. Many people do not understand anger, it's not easy to because they can't tell if one is directing their anger toward them.
I guess what I'm saying is that I understand your anger. And, I see it as part of your grieving.
The important thing is that you understand it and allow yourselve the luxury of grieving and then the anger will find it's proper place.
I do think that , and perhaps this sound like a cliche, you should assess how much grief all the bad things in your life are worthy of and then grieve no more. You have the promise of a future , that you have a certain amount of control over.....
Sincerely, d'art