# Holiday Fruit Cake

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Posted by kc [circe] on November 15, 1999 at 10:32:07 {AS5l1tybL6W53SZukFgE1f0.a//UGw}:

This is off topic, but I couldn't resist. :-)

HOLIDAY FRUIT CAKE
1 cup water
1 cup sugar
1 cup butter
4 large eggs
4 cups flour
2 cups dried fruit
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup brown sugar
2 Tsp lemon juice
1 cup mixed nuts
1 gallon good whiskey

Simple Directions:

Sample the whiskey to check for quality. 1 cup should give you a good idea.

Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 cup butter in large bowl.

Add 1 teaspoon sugar and beat again.

Make sure the whiskey is still OK. Have another tup.

Turn off mixer.

Break 2 legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup
of dried fruit.

Mix on the turner.

Add 2 tableshpoons whiskey.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it
loose with a drewscriver.

Sample more whiskey to check for tonsisticaty.

Next, sift 2 cups of salt. Or something. Who cares?

Whisk the checkey.

Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something.

Whatever you can find.

Grease the oven.

Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Throw the bowl out of the window.

Go to bed.

Who the heck likes fruitcake anyway?

kc

Follow Ups:

- *Holiday Fruit Cake Duncan 06:48:02 11/16/99 (0)
- *Holiday Fruit Cake when 05:08:16 11/16/99 (1)
  - **Holiday Fruit Cake kc 07:35:37 11/16/99 (0)
- *Holiday Fruit Cake YaYa 16:51:14 11/15/99 (0)
- *Holiday Fruit Cake Pete 15:33:44 11/15/99 (1)
  - **Holiday Fruit Cake kc 07:37:32 11/16/99 (0)
- *Holiday Fruit Cake Hysterical!! 15:32:38 11/15/99 (0)
- *Holiday Fruit Cake Snowball 14:03:46 11/15/99 (3)
  - **Holiday Fruit Cake felix a 05:13:14 11/16/99 (0)
  - **Holiday Fruit Cake kc 15:17:59 11/15/99 (1)
    - ***Holiday Fruit Cake Snowball 21:18:52 11/15/99 (0)
- *Holiday Fruit Cake Beaver 11:17:20 11/15/99 (4)
  - **Holiday Fruit Cake felix a 05:10:09 11/16/99 (3)
    - ***Holiday Fruit Cake Beaver 07:32:01 11/16/99 (2)
      - ****Holiday Fruit Cake size not import 11:45:30 11/16/99 (1)
        - *****Holiday Fruit Cake Beaver 12:09:23 11/16/99 (0)

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