Posted by Randall Watters [2bithonky] on November 11, 1999 at 20:51:12 {mJnjjpluA6Qn4qgfbui2QNyTO0grzY}:
Fred Hall wrote me privately, and in his usual way he was poking fun at me, saying that I would not be with Albert Schroeder in heaven, unless I come back (but added that I don't have the heavenly hope like he does.) LOL
Anyway, I responded that I had once had dreams about walking with Schroeder someday, at a time more favorable, when we were friends. The dreams began after leaving Bethel, and after having listened to Schroeder speak of the "apostasy" at Bethel elder's meetings, etc. I prayed for him often. Like Ray Franz and unlike many of you, I understood the man, and could see myself in his shoes under different circumstances. I, too, was once an organization man, even turning in a fellow worker for talk that I considered "apostasy," just a year before I changed. That is why no one ever suspected me of it until I turned in my letter of disassociation, becuae they all thought I was still the same personality.
Schroeder is not an evil man, but power and the need to "keep the machine" going sometimes makes us bow down in the end. The corporate world is full of many such examples. Companies are like icons, and need to keep a certain public image to continue attracting others. The system is often selfish or even evil, but the leaders are sometimes caught up in the struggle of life and family.
The Watchtower is an extended family, with millions of members. I care for that family, I wish not that any would be hurt in the end. I have my own "family" now, and I would do most anything to protect them.
Regardless of whatever any of you may believe regarding the Bible, I would like to share one thing I learned in my last year at Bethel, during our private Bible readings. That is that God's way of parenting his children is far more beautiful and wise than the principle of rules and "police enforcement." Even a humanist can appreciate it, apart from belief in God. You have to believe in the goodness in others, that most people want to do what is right. The principle of "grace" as taught in the New Testament, and the consequences of understanding it in your personal life and walk with God, is invaluable, the greatest treasure ever found in the Book. It sets you free from fear, and you are not easily shaken afterwards.