Hailing the nearby camel, he excitedly hiked to Camelot to go to Camel Zoo, then rest in Camel Hotel. For lunch, he had dinner. While masticulating, our dear turkey heard weird sounds coming from the garage, the sound of laughing hyenas, and a burp. Turkey instinctively guessed that this was his midnight snack. Though he was drunk, he still managed to probe his way through the darkness to the nearest Ball Pit, where he searched for his long lost pitchfork. Instead, he stumbled upon a large, hairy, juicy blob of minute maid concentrate orange juice.
"AHHHH!" He cried nervously, "This the result of playing five minutes of a cheap video game demo at 2:30 am july 22nd, 1999!!!"
"YES." Said a mysterious, unidentifiable voice (even with all of mankinds' modern technology) that could be heard in Caps Lock. "YOU ARE NOW A VICTIM OF 2ND MARRIAGE RESOLUTION DEFICIENCY."
"But--my--the--they said that drinking tap water while watching seinfeild would increase my winning chances on bingo night."
"OOPS," said the voice, "THESE TELEPHONES ARE BECOMING LESS USER-FRIENDLY. BY THE WAY, MY NAME IS BOB. YES, the BOB OF BALTIMORE AQUARIUM.
--deep, audible breathing noises--
"TURKEY, I AM YOUR FATH-
--wheeze! cough! snort! gurgle! kaplooey!--
