Mam:  Hey, what was wrong with the Tsukikage no Knight? 
 

Mich:  Well, it does sound a little better in Japanese.  But you have to ask what was wrong with him?  I mean, Tuxedo Mask is bad enough… 
 

Mam:  Excuse me? 
 

Mich:  Come on, he’s the cheesiest super-hero that I’ve ever seen!  Well, next to the Moonlight Knight, of course.  Throwing around flowers, giving corny encouragement speeches to Sailor Moon.  And what’s up with that top hat, anyways? 
 

Mam:  I’ll have you know that I’m very popular in Japan, and I’m considered the epitome of romance and class.  Stop giggling!  At least I wear a classy costume, not those flame-boy spandex tights like your American super heroes! 
 

Mich:  Hey!  Isn't that the Batmobile? 
 

Mam:  And Usagi is ten times prettier than that homely Lois Lane! 
 

Mich:  Yeah, but you still have to save her butt all the time! 
 

Mam:  Hey, at least she has super-powers! 
 

Mich:  But at least Lois can write!  She works for a newspaper!  Usagi can’t even use kanji when she’s older! 
 

Mam:  What do you know about kanji, anyway, you… 
 

(Um, we continued like this for several more minutes, but I can’t really reprint here what was said.  This is a clean, decent site after all.  But continuing with the interview…) 
 

Mich:  Okay, so what is the best part about being Tuxedo Kamen?  Is it the flying through the air, or the roses, or the (ahem) classy outfit? 
 

Mam:  Well, all of those things are nice, but the best thing about being Tuxedo Kamen is the chicks! 

Mam:  We don’t have all of that politically correct junk in Japan.  You’ll notice that a lot of things about our show isn’t very politically correct by your standards. Young girls running about in sexy outfits, trying to be strong but needing to be saved by a man.  Girls being silly and air-headed, chasing after guys and shopping all the time… 
 

Mich:  Okay, okay, I get the point.  But don't get your cape in a knot.  This is just a cartoon, you know! 

Mam: Cartoon?!?  I beg your pardon!  "Scooby-Doo" is a cartoon!  "Pinky and the Brain" is a cartoon!  Sailor Moon is anime!  It's an art form, something that your american animators know little about! 
 

Mich:  Okay, I'll agree with you there.  The quality of Sailor Moon is much higher than the regular US "cartoons."  Sailor Moon has a quality that's usually reserved for our feature-length animated films.  But let's get back to the subject.  Now, in the, ahem,  anime, you throw around roses:  red roses when you're Tux, white roses when you're the Moonlight Knight, black roses when you're evil... 
 

Mam:  Pretty cool, huh? 
 

Mich:  Well, actually, I was thinking that it was pretty goofy... 
 

Mam:  Hey! 
 

Mich:  But back to the rest of my question... 
 

Mam:  Sorry... 
 

Mich:  Now in the manga you didn't use the roses, did you? 
 

Mam:  No, that was an anime thing. 
 

Mich:  Did you have any special attacks in the manga that didn't appear in the anime? 
 

Mam:  Yes, I had the "Tuxedo La Smoking Bomber" attack. 

Mam:  Stop laughing at me!  You are so rude! 
 

Mich:  (with tears now running down her face from laughing so hard...)  I'm so (ha, ha), sorry (ha, ha, ha).  Really!  So, what doe this attack do?  (ha, ha, ha)  Oh, never mind, I don't really want to know.  I'm starting to hurt from laughing so hard!  (hee, hee, hee)  Oh, I'm sorry, let's get back to the subject, okay? 
 

Mam:  Well, I'm not the one who got off track! 
 

Mich:  You're right, you're right.  I'm sorry.  So, let's get back to the anime.  Now here is an interesting scene.  What's up with the windsurfer? 
 
 

Mam:  Hey, get that picture off of here!  I have to resort to any means necessary to save the senshi and the Earth! 
 

Mich:  Well, didn’t your feet get wet? 
 

Mam:  What does that have to do with anything? 
 

Mich:  Well, how can you save the world if you have soggy socks? 
 

Mam:  You need to get a hobby. 
 

Mich:  This is my hobby! 
 

Mam:  That figures! 
 

Mich:  And what is that supposed to mean? 
 

(Sorry, folks, this part had to be edited out, too…) 
 

Mich:  Hey, this is a clean, decent site, remember?  Okay, let’s talk about your name.  Now, MIXX gives you the last name of Sheilds… 
 

Mamoru groans, I nod my head sympathetically…  
 

Mich:  But what was your last name in the original Japanese? 
 
 

Mam:  Chiba.  Actually, I had lost my memory when I was a child, so I don’t know what my real name is.  You see, when I was very young, I was in a really bad car accident with my parents.  They both died, so I grew up in an orphanage.  I suppose that’s why Usagi and Chibi-Usa are so important to me, and that's why I always fight so hard to keep them safe.  They are my new family, and I don’t want to lose them, too.  Uh, are you laughing? 

Mam:  Do you find this humorous?  What the heck is wrong with you?  Are you sick or what? 
 

Mich:  I’m sorry, but your last name is Chiba, right? 
 

Mam:  Yes, that’s what I said! 
 

Mich:  (giggling) So when you were a little kid, did they call you Chibi-Chiba?  (Uncontrollable laughter…) 
 

Mam:  Hey, that isn’t funny!  I’m trying to be serious here! 
 

Mich:  Um, sorry.  Really.  (snicker)  Now, in the Japanese version, you were known as Mamoru in the present, Prince Endymion in the past, and King Endymion in the future, correct? 
 

Mam:  Yes, that's right.  Unfortunately, DIC called me Darien, Prince Darien, and King Darien.  Thus, when I uttered that classic line in Japanese, "Mamoru, Mamoru...  That name means nothing to me," I didn't sound like a schizophrenic idiot like I do in the DIC version! 

Mam:  That's correct. 
 

Mich:  That does make a lot more sense.  So, is there anything else that you want to tell me about your different roles? 
 

Mam:  Well, I’m the only male main character.  As such, well, I always get the chick!  Of course there was Usagi, but there was also Rei and that alien girl Ann.  And just between you and me, I think I could have changed Haruka’s mind, if you catch my drift… (wink, wink) 

 

Mam:  First of all, the correct term is "Tsukikage no Knight."  He was the incarnation of my love for Usagi.  Even though my mind didn't remember her, my heart did, and it created this special essence of my love to protect her. 
 

Mich:  Ugh, I'm sorry I asked.  And I thought that the costume was bad!  Didn’t somebody call you "Turban Boy" in the DIC version?  
 

Mam:  Man, you are just cruel. 
 

Mich:  And exactly what are you doing with your finger in that picture? 
 

Mam:  Why don’t you go bug somebody else? 
 

Mich:  Okay, okay!  Let's move on and talk about your relationships.  Continue to Part II of the interview.