Chapter Seven
<><><><><><><>
 

It was about a month later and Celine was sitting on her sofa, fondling a worn piece of paper as she waited for him to answer his phone.  She knew Justin was on tour but she didn't know which city he was in.  It rang three times before she heard him say "Hello," in a quiet, muffled voice.

She looked at the clock which said 2 PM.  "Justin, were you sleeping?"

She heard silence on the phone and then he said, "I was but I'm not now."  She could feel some tension in his voice, "Are you alone?" she asked.

He growled, "Of course.  How are you Celine?"

She took a deep breath and then said, "I'm doing well.  That's why I'm calling.  I wanted to let you know, as I promised I would, that I'm due to have a baby in February."

She heard a sharp intake of air on the other end and then the voice she so loved said to her, "Really!?  No lie?  I'm so happy for you.  I had assumed you weren't pregnant since you hadn't called me."

She knew Justin was referring to the fact that she purposely hadn't contacted him in order to put distance between them and let things return to normal.  She could tell he was smiling.

"No lie, Justin.  Rene is so thrilled, as you know I am."

He softly asked, "Do you want a boy or a girl?"

Celine said, "I don't care as long as he or she is healthy and has your blue eyes."

Justin chuckled.  "I hope you'll let me see you before you have the baby.  I'd like to see the results of our endeavors.  It'll just seem like a dream unless I can see you actually looking pregnant, Celine."

Celine smiled and said, "Oh, don't worry.  Look me up in about 7 months!"

"I'm happy for you, Celine.  Let me know if you need anything.  You know I'd do anything for you...and the baby," Justin said, a little sadly.

She said, "I know."  They said goodbye and Justin couldn't help but wonder what their baby would look like.  He snuggled back into the covers and fell asleep again, thinking of Celine.

Justin was in the middle of rehearsals for the biggest performance of his life.  The Super Bowl was just around the corner and he had been hanging out all week with the guys, working on their dance routine for the Halftime show.  Things were hectic and nerves were ragged. They'd started going through the layout of the performance with Aerosmith, Mary K. Blige and Nelly at the Lakeland Center.  Of course, Britney wasn't around.  She'd be there in a few days to learn the routine.  He hadn't seen her in a month, which was nothing new.  As he was driving to the Lakeland Center, his cell phone started ringing and he rolled his eyes.  He wasn't in the mood to talk to Britney.  He knew she was busy but the fact was that she was never around and he missed her.  "Hello," he said.

"Justin?  Hi, it's Celine.  Guess what?"

"What?" he asked.  He hated guessing games, but was interested in her news.  He'd seen her just three weeks before when they had lunch at a cafe in downtown Orlando.  She had looked radiant, more happy than he'd ever seen her...and very pregnant.  The lunch had been spent talking about her plans for the baby.  He'd left her that day feeling some resolution to his conflicting feelings.

Back in his car, Justin heard her say, "I had the baby, Justin.  It's a boy.  We named him Rene Charles and guess what?  He's got little blond curls.  He absolutely perfect and looks like an angel.  I know you must be extremely busy, but Rene and I would like you to come over tonight to meet him.  Can you make it?"

Justin cleared his throat, not really knowing what to say.  Did he want to see this baby?  He couldn't help himself.  "Yeah, sure, what time do you want me there?"  She told him to be there at 7:30 and he agreed.  The rest of the day was spent going over the dance moves and vocal arrangements, but his heart was preparing for the meeting with his son.

* * * * * *

Justin parked his car in the familiar driveway and made his way to the door.  He was excited to see the baby but hesitant to see Celine and Rene fawning over his child.  He knew he'd agreed to it and signed the papers, but that didn't change his feelings.  He had run home, showered and changed into khakis and a creamy yellow, long-sleeved Henley shirt.  When Celine opened the door, she felt like she hadn't seen him in years.  His hair was shorter and darker and he looked so young and handsome; she wanted to hold him again.  "Justin, come in," she said instead.

She was beaming at him and he was smiling at her excitement.  "Rene, Justin's here," she yelled toward the back.

As Celine and Justin walked into the room, Rene came up and grabbed Justin's hand for a handshake.  "Justin, I'm glad you could join us tonight."  As he shook Rene's hand, Justin couldn't help but feel a little odd about the situation.  He still didn't see any resentment of any kind when he looked at Rene's eyes though.  Celine was still smiling as she looked at them both.  Rene said, "I'm just barbecuing some steaks.  Will you join us for dinner?" he asked as he walked back towards the doors leading to the patio.

Justin replied, "Sure, if that's ok," and looked at Celine.

"Wanna meet him?" she said with a huge smile on her face.  Justin nodded and she grabbed his hand, pulling him down the hallway, past the guest room where they'd spent such intense hours.  She had to slow down as Justin slowed to glance into the room.  It was thick with memories for him and Celine knew it.

"Come this way," she said as she kept pulling him down the hall.  In the room next to the master bedroom, he could hear a lullaby playing softly.  Celine quietly opened the door and Justin was overtaken with baby smells.  He peered into the dark room as Celine lead him to the crib.  She clicked on a small lamp near the bed which lent just enough light to illuminate the crib.  Celine stepped aside so he could see and watched his face as he gazed down at his son.

Justin held his breath as he reached into the crib and softly stroked the baby's curls. He noted that his hands looked huge and he turned to smile at Celine.  "God, Celine," was all he whispered but Celine could see the amazement in his eyes.  The mellow light in the room lent a warm glow to everything and she was again mesmerized by Justin's beauty as he gaped at the baby.

"He should be awake in a little while, screaming for some milk," she whispered to Justin.  He nodded his head and turned to leave the room.  Celine stopped him with her hand on his forearm.  He looked at her  hand gripping his arm and then at her face, where he found she had tears in her eyes.  She cupped his face with her hands and said softly, "Thank you so much."

He grinned at her and shrugged like a boy, "You're welcome, I guess."  He was raking his eyes over her face and his gaze landed on her lips.  She knew what he was thinking, so she stepped back to put some distance between them.  She heard Rene call her name and excused herself before joining him in the living room.  Justin shook his head as he followed her out of the baby's room, closing the door softly behind him.

He found Rene and Celine on the patio.  Rene handed him a glass of red wine.  "Justin, I'm glad you made it tonight.  I have a few things I want to say to you."

Justin tensed up visibly as he looked quickly from Rene to Celine and back to Rene again.

"Is there a problem?" he asked, a little worried.

Rene smiled as he noticed Justin's unease.  "Don't worry, young man.  It isn't going to hurt.  I wouldn't invite you over here if I felt there was a problem.  I just wanted to let you know that I'm impressed, so far, at how you've dealt with this.  Celine talked to me about the difficulty the two of you had at the end of your time together.  I half expected there to be problems after that but was surprised when none materialized.  You've shown tremendous maturity in accepting our invitation tonight."

Justin looked a little surprised himself and visibly relaxed, saying "Well, it's not a normal situation.  My parents taught me that your word is your honor.  My former manager may disagree, but regardless of popular opinion, I don't break agreements," he paused looking at his wine before continuing.  "That doesn't mean it has been easy to step out of the picture.  But I know that you and Celine will be great parents and the baby will be surrounded by love.  How can I mess with that?  I'm not ready for it yet.  Someday, I'll have my own babies."  He nodded an unspoken agreement at Rene before he took a long drink of the wine.

Rene quietly asked, "So where is your girlfriend, anyway?"

Justin snorted, and with a tinge of anger in his voice, said, "Who the hell knows?  She'll be here tomorrow.  We have a little show to do this weekend."  Celine could tell things were not going very well with Justin and Britney.

"Maybe you guys should talk," Celine said.

Justin confessed, "Oh, we talk, don't worry.  We spent a little time together over Christmas but now she's working again and doesn't want me around."   He made an exaggerated pout and stuck his lip out, before smiling at Celine and Rene.  "Not that I'm complaining or anything," he said.

Celine could tell he really didn't want to talk about Britney, so she said, "Rene, could you help me in the kitchen for a sec?"  She handed Justin a tablecloth and motioned toward the patio.

He spread the tablecloth on the table and sat down, swirling the wine around in his glass before taking another drink.  Dinner was over just in time for the baby to wake up and start crying.  Celine smiled at Rene who nodded at her.  She turned to look at Justin and asked, "Justin, do you want to go get him?"

Justin's whole face lit up, "Can I?"

Celine and Rene laughed at his eagerness and Celine said, "Yes, sure you can.  Just remember to grab his binky and a blanket.  Make sure to support his head."

Justin was gone in a flash.  As he walked up to the crib and turned on the lamp, he said, "Aw, Charlie?  Whatsamatter?" and cuddled the baby to his shoulder.

As he walked down the hallway, toward the patio, Celine could see that he was whispering in the baby's ear.  He had one arm around the baby and clutched the blanket and binky in his other hand.  The baby was still groggily bobbing his head so Justin changed arms and put his free hand behind the baby's head.  She smiled as she saw him kissing the baby's cheek and fingers, all the while talking to him in a soft voice.  At that moment, she wished more than anything else that Justin would be a dad again.  He had the gentle touch.  Celine walked up to them, and Justin looked at her.  She could swear he had tears in his eyes as he quickly gave her son to her.  He leaned in close and kissed the baby's cheek again before looking at her.  He blinked away the tears and leaned in for a quick kiss to her cheek too.

He then said, "I've got to go.  We aren't done with the rehearsals yet.  I don't want JC to kill Chris and Joey, so I better go.  Besides, you guys need some family time."

Rene walked up and said, "Sorry you have to leave but we understand.  The show must go on, right?" Rene said as he shook Justin's hand.   Justin nodded and waved as he made a hasty retreat out the door.

The night was a huge and important night for her industry and Celine was watching from home.  Because of baby Rene's cold, she had decided not to attend the Grammy Awards that night and was settling in to watch it on television.  The baby was sleeping in the basinette and she watched as all the beautiful people walked down the red carpet, stopping for interviews along the way.  She loved going to award shows.  MTV was interviewing everyone as they made their way along.  John Norris was there screaming over the top of a commotion and the next thing she knew, the guys from *NSYNC were standing next to him.  They were laughing and looked very trendy.  JC looked like a dapper Sherlock Holmes.

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed as she got her first look at Justin.  He had shaved his head!  He looked good though, dressed in a green suede suit, laughing and joking with the guys and Norris.  He looked young, sexy, happy and again, Britney-less.  Celine watched in shock as she remembered how much she loved playing with the curls on his head.  "It's only hair," she thought and knew Justin probably felt the same.

The show started and it wasn't long before *NSYNC was performing "This I Promise You."  It was a very elegant performance, playing with colors and shadows.  The boys all were scrumptious as usual, but Justin looked especially memorable.  Dressed in a red, textured leather, mock turtleneck and black leather pants, he slinked across the stage like a cat as he sang his part, weaving his way between still-life models bathed in black and white "light."

Celine guiltily thanked God that Rene was out of town on business as she watched every move Justin made.  She looked over at baby Rene sleeping peacefully and ran her fingers over his delicate ringlets.  She was tired from the day's activities and decided to rest her eyes.  Before doing so, she hit the record button on her VCR so she could watch the award show later, in case she fell asleep.  She was up for an award, and *NSYNC was up for three.

Celine nodded off shortly after laying down and was awakened about a half hour later by a phone call from a very excited Madeline.  "Oh my God!  Celine, are you watching the Grammy Awards?" she was excitedly yelling into the phone.

Celine blinked the sleep away and told Madeline that she'd taken a nap but was recording it.  Madeline said, "I'm coming over, girl.  You aren't going to believe what happened.  Rewind the tape and I'll be there in a few minutes."

True to her word, Madeline walked in Celine's front door 10 minutes later, dressed in her sweats and a t-shirt.  "You got it cued up?" she asked Celine.

Celine hit play and gave the remote to Madeline.  "What is it, Maddie? What is the big deal?  Did I win?" she asked, very confused.

Madeline looked at her sadly, "No, baby, you didn't, but someone else did!"  As she said that, she found the part she wanted Celine to see.  On the screen were the nominees for Best Pop Performance By A Duo Or Group With Vocal.  "And the winner is....*NSYNC for 'Bye Bye Bye'!" yelled the presenter.  The camera quickly found *NSYNC in the front row as they jumped up, yelling, smiling and hugging each other.

"Oh my God, Maddie!  They won!?" she screamed.  "Look at Justin!" came from her mouth as she watched Justin hugging JC and smiling his million dollar smile.  The boys all ran up the stairs and clamored around the podium, laughing and waving at the fans.  Justin was standing in back of the others, holding the Grammy and looking at it in awe.

JC said, "WHOA!  I can't believe this."  Chris took the microphone next and thanked God for his blessings, their families, Johnny Wright and their security.  Joey came next and thanked all the producers and writers.  Lance talked a little bit about what "Bye Bye Bye" meant to the five of them.  They all pointed at the top of the room where the fans were and sent them all their love.  At last, Justin stepped up to the mic and said, "We also want to send out a special thank you to all the artists and producers who believed in us.  Gloria, Rosie, Alabama, Janet, Sha'kspeare, Left Eye, Teddy Riley, Richard Marx, Phil Collins, and Celine, we'll never forget all your support.  We also wouldn't be where we are today without the folks in radio or at MTV.  Last, but not least, thank you to Lou Pearlman who was the first to listen and give us a chance."  He paused for a split second and smiled slowly.  He looked at JC, who smiled at him.  He looked right into the camera and said, "Leelee, thank you for everything and kiss Charlie for me."  He stood there for a brief moment and then waved a little wave at the camera before turning and bounding off the stage with his friends.

Celine was barely breathing as Madeline stopped the VCR and turned off the TV.  Madeline looked at Celine who had a smile on her face and a tear falling down her cheek.  "Aw, Celine, are you ok?" she said as she hugged her friend close.

"I'm so happy they won.  But I'm pretty sure that Justin just said goodbye and walked out of our life," Celine said sadly.   She shook her head then, not really knowing why she was crying.

Madeline stayed for awhile to make sure Celine was ok, finally leaving around midnight.

Celine knew that she and her family would be just fine, but a part of her felt sorry.  Would she miss him?  She hadn't seen him since before the Super Bowl.  She and Rene planned on raising the baby without Justin, and Justin was aware of that.  So, it wasn't too surprising that he backed away.  But Celine felt sorry for herself.  It was a sense of loss; Justin occupied a place in her heart, whether she admitted it to Rene or not.  It wasn't a threatening place, but a personal, private place that she'd saved for him, as the father of her baby.  Their relationship was based on a business deal ultimately, but it had ended up being more than that to each of them.  She smiled as she remembered what a sweet lover he'd been; his intense eyes, his sexy mouth and most of all his never failing energy and sensuality.

Gazing at Justin's beautiful son and remembering their three days together, she knew she wouldn't change a thing.  Looking back at what seemed like one brief moment in time, she knew that the moment was over and that she and Rene's lives were changed forever.  And it had all been worth it.