Two rimes the fun, wrapped up and rolled into one!
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Rhinokey's Quotes
Here's a list of some of Rhinokey's (rhinoceros + monkey) famous jokes, quotes, and insults. Well almost famous!
His repertoire of jokes and one-liners mainly involve Hoppopotamus, who is usually the butt of his jokes.
Looks like some change in the weather. I'll take mine in nickels, dimes, and quarters.
I prefer applause, but thunder clapping will do.
If anything will plug that volcano it's Hoppo's potamus.
Follow that and we'll find Hoppo, her stomach's growling.
And we haven't been to Hoppo's yet. When she packs a lunch, she has to rent a trailer.
Good grief! My banana-float split is going to be a banana-float splat!
With your talent you should be on the stage. The next one leaves in an hour.
All I have to do is take perfect aim. Perfect aim? This is Hoppo, how can I miss?
Say did you hear the one about the guy who took a ruler to bed to see how long he slept?
Say did you hear the one about the guy who walked into an antique store and asked, "what's new?"
I couldn't even solve a jigsaw puzzle if it only has two pieces.
I know you think I'm crazy, and this is the first time I'm agreeing with you.
Well what's the worst that could happen, huh? They'll throw me in jail with a captive audience for my jokes!
Always happens, the spare is flat too.
More words of wisdom from Rhinokey! This time, it's conversational punch lines!
<Hoppopotamus> I don't need exercise, I've got the body of a beauty queen.
<Rhinokey> Well you better give it back, you're stretching it out of shape.
<Eleroo> What kind of costume are you going to wear this year Bumblelion?
<Bumblelion> Uh something new, something original, something special.
<Rhinokey> The old ghost costume, huh?
<Rhinokey> What kind of key goes in through a door and goes out through a window?
<Eaglebeagle> I give up. What kind?
<Rhinokey> A Rhinokey!
<Eleroo> But I'm worrying as fast as I can.
<Rhinokey> Good, then I don't have to worry.
<Hoppopotamus> Do you think my voice will move the audience?
<Rhinokey> If they haven't moved already.
<Moosel> Why are we chasing an egg?
<Rhinokey> Who cares, the fun is in the scramble. Oh I break me up!
<Hoppopotamus> Here's a section on how to greet a lady.
<Rhinokey> Great, find a lady and let's get started!
<Eaglebeagle> OK funny boy, we've just found a big pile of money in your mailbox. What have you got to say now?
<Rhinokey> I'll take three more mailboxes just like it!
<Butterbear> I didn't know minahbears like to bowl.
<Rhinokey> It's right up their alley.
<Hoppopotamus> You mean I'm too big a star for this little theatre.
<Rhinokey> Well, lets just say someone like you should be on the wide screen.
<Butterbear> Wait Hoppo, where are you going?
<Hoppopotamus> Off to where a big star like me belongs. To a place where a top banana gets top billings. Where the cream rises to the top.
<Rhinokey> I knew it! She's off to the malt shop again.
<Mrs. Pedagree> Excuse me, but are you free?
<Rhinokey> Nope, but I'm inexpensive.
<Rhinokey> Psst... I'm up here.
<Moosel> What are you doing up there?
<Rhinokey> Trying to shed a little light on my problem.
<Hoppopotamus> You know how badly I wanted to sing the Wuz National Anthem.
<Rhinokey> And no one can sing is as badly as you!