| A group of blondes in a university class are given the assignment to measure the height of a portable flagpole. They go out to the flagpole with ladders and tape measures and they're falling off the ladders, dropping the tape measures - the whole thing is just a mess. An engineering student comes along, sees what they're trying to do, walks over, pulls the flagpole out of the ground, lays it flat, measures it from end to end, and then gives the measurement to one of the blondes and walks away. After the engineer has gone, one blonde turns to another and laughs. "Isn't that just like a dumb engineer? We're looking for the height and he gives us the length!" |
| A brunette and a blonde (hmmm, know any?) were watching the 6 o'clock news. There was a guy threatening to jump off of a building. The brunette said "I'll bet you $50 that he jumps". Blonde- Ok, you're on. Sure enough he jumped. Blonde - Darnit, well, here's your $50 Brunette - I feel bad taking your money. I already saw that story on the 5 o'clock news. Blonde - Don't feel bad, so did I. I just didn't think he'd jump again. |
| Two blondes decided to rob a bank together. The first blonde, Judy, planned the robbery and went over the plan with the second blonde, Buffie, in great detail. The robbery began. Judy drove up in front of the bank, stopped the car and said to Buffie, "I want to make absolutely sure you understand the plan. You are supposed to be in and out of the bank in no more than three minutes with the cash. Do you understand the plan?" "Perfectly," replied Buffie. Buffie went in the bank while Judy waited in the getaway car. One minute passed...three minutes pass...seven minutes pass...and Judy was really stressing out. Finally, the bank doors burst open! And here came Buffie. She had a safe wrapped up in rope and is dragging it to the car. About the time she got the safe in the trunk of the car, the bank doors burst open again with the security guard coming out. The guard's pants and underwear are down around his ankles while he was firing his weapon. As the gals are getting away, Judy yelled, "You are such a blonde! I thought you understood the plan!" Buffie said, "I did. I did exactly what you said!" "No, you idiot," snapped Judy. "You got it all mixed up. I said, 'Tie up the GUARD and blow the SAFE!'" |