Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to break up the day. Here is your dose... Follow the instructions to find your new name. The following is an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants", by Dave Pilkey:

   The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...

   Use the third letter of your first name to determine YOUR new first name:

   A = poopsie  B = lumpy  C = buttercup  D = gidget
E = crusty  F = greasy  G = fluffy  H = cheeseball
I = chim-chim  J = stinky  K = flunky  L = booger
M = pinky  N = zippy  O = goober  P = doofus
Q = slimy  R = loopy  S = snotty  T = tulefel
U = dorkey  V = squeezit  W = oprah  X = skipper
Y = dinky  Z = zsa zsa
  Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:
 
   A = diaper  B = toilet  C = giggle  D = burger
E = girdle  F = barf  G = lizard  H = waffle
I = cootie  J = monkey  K = potty  L = liver
M = banana  N = rhino  O = bubble  P = hamster
Q = toad  R = gizzard  S = pizza  T = gerbil
U = chicken  V = pickle  W = chuckle  X = tofu
Y = gorilla  Z = stinker
  Use the fourth letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:

A = head  B = mouth  C = face  D = nose
E = tush  F = breath  G = pants  H = shorts
I = lips  J = honker  K = butt  L = brain
M = tushie  N = chunks  O = hiney  P = biscuits
Q = toes  R = buns  S = fanny  T = sniffer
U = sprinkles  V = kisser  W = squirt  X = humperdinck
Y = brains  Z = juice

   Thus, for example, the guys new names are...

   Justin Timberlake - Snotty Cootiemouth
   Lance Bass - Zippy Diaperfanny
   Josh Chasez - Snotty Wafflefanny
   Joey Fatone - Crusty Diaperhiney
   Chris Kirkpatrick - Loopy Cootiebutt

   And I am of course, Buttercup Cootietoes


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Buttercup Cootietoes
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