WHO HATES THE
NEW YORK YANKEES???

I do!  And I bet you do too if you're looking at this page.

Why do the Yanks suck?  They just do, it's a known fact.  It's like saying jenna jameson is hot.  You don't go explaining it, she just is and everybody knows it.  Even the Yankee fans suck.  The overall suckiness of the team wears off on the poor bastards and they become assholes, just like that!  It's amazing, really.

Let's take a look at some of the players...

  It all starts with this bitch, Derek Jeter.  "Ooooh, he's so cute I could just die!"  Ya know what, I wish this guy would, 'cause he's a toolbag.  There is NO WAY he's better than Nomar.  Case closed.
 

  Now here's a real bastard, Andy Pettitte.  He's a lefty, big deal.  You know why I don't like him?  His nose.  It's friggin' huge!  They wonder what happened to the shnozz on the Sphinx?  HEY!  TAKE A LOOK IN YANKEE STADIUM!  His chin is messed up, too.
 

  Now let's talk role models.  He definitely is not one.  Dwight Gooden, aka, Coke Addict.  Oh yeah, he also throws small explosives at little girls on the street.  Then he tosses a no-hitter and everybody thinks he's an angel, a great come-back story.  He's a loser!!!  Get it right!!!
 

  "Uhh, hi.  I'm Roger Clemens.  I wish I wasn't so fat."  See, this is what happens when you play for the Stankees.  "Hey, do you smell pork rinds?"
 

  "Uhh, hi.  I'm Chuck Knoblauch.  I wish I brought my glove with me when I left Minnessota, because now I can't field for ass.  I mean who ever knew first base was such a hard throw from second?"
 

New York City sucks, too.  It's dirty, filthy, disgusting, and the chances of getting raped analy by a midget gorilla with herpes is the highest in the world!  They don't clean the place, they just build more elaborate junk over everything else.  "It's the city that never sleeps," they say.  Well, DUH!  You can't sleep because you're always looking over your back for a psycho knife killer.