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By 4:30 this afternoon, I intend to be reinstated at my former position and with a sizable raise...
I�m gonna try and be gracious about it for as long as I possibly can, then I�m gonna stick it to the motherfucker. Keep the change, Deb.
You ATE in my car?
Because I consider you to be my most important client. Because I regard you as my most valuable account.
Because no one�s close personal friendship means more to me than yours. I wanted you to be the first to know, I�m starting my own agency.
You passed shitfaced about ten miles back.
I�ve only known the Concerned Citizens for the Truth for a short time but I�ve known them long enough to know
that they don�t like to accept handouts� charitable donations. But I guess this time I�m just gonna have to tell them that once in awhile we could all use a little help and they�re just gonna have to swallow their fucking pride and say - thank you.
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Well, I for one think you�re to be commended, Theodore. .. what you�ve accomplished is an amazing achievement... to sink so low, to hit bottom with such a resounding thud... of course, the good news is, once you�ve hit the bottom, you can�t go any lower so, that means there�s only way to go. And that way is? sounds like... (raises his coffee cup)
(T: Up?)
Yeah, you want to develop that six-pack before you drink it. I can use that for the ad.
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E: So I�ve been going to the gym religiously�
B: Is that why you were kneeling in the steam room?
B: I miss the old orgy room.
J: You could make it a conference room.
B: It�s perfect! For screwing the competition.
Save your diva routine for your world tour.
Well, guess what. Like Jesus and Liza and Judy, he�s making a comeback.
Oh, and by the way, I fucked Ramon, and his dick�s the size of a Ticonderoga No. 3. After it�s been sharpened. Sorry�
404
It�s nothing you haven�t heard before. Did drugs, fucked around, hit bottom, regrets it deeply. Let�s go.
Listen to me. Are you listening? You may be a pathetic drug addict who lost everything, your dignity, your livelihood, your lover, your good name, the respect and trust of everyone you know� but there�s one thing you haven�t lost. You�re still an accountant. That�s who you are. Not even the lowest form of degradation can take that away from you. Now. Let�s live in the solution, not the problem.
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God, I can think of so many more interesting things to do with my right hand.
How sweet. A 12 step valentine. I�m touched, Theodore. But, um, where�s the check?
The point of having a cell phone is that you leave it on. Where the fuck are you?
That�s it? That�s the big fat�? No. A big fat lie is �I won�t come in your mouth.�
M: It was kinda boring.
B: Kinda like him?
M: Could you say that to Justin?
B:Yeah. But fortunately, the lad�s a genius!
Well, eventually they come out to feed but if I were you I'd lock up the live stock.
Why the fuck did you call me? I have no practical skills whatsoever in talking lesbians out of trees.
Now then, show me on the doll where the bad man touched you.
Is it better to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune or take arms and by opposing end them?...
An eye for an eye - or turn the other cheek? Fight fire with fire or do unto others as you would have them do - you know the rest. So, Which is it?