| Sunny Side Up July 3, 2002 �2002, Kathleen Gibson God is for real men too I know some truly remarkable men. It was the day of our church�s Spring Strawberry Tea. Available husbands and sons had been drafted to help with odd jobs and set-up. �I�m coming into town about noon,� our ladies ministry president called to say, �and my son�s coming to help with the babysitting.� Gentle as spring rain, tough as bale string, strong as four women; her son, a congenial blonde cowboy in his mid-twenties, likely rode horseback before he could walk. A confirmed bachelor, his mother says, though I keep telling him he�s too good to waste. We could use him. Already had, in fact�he�d helped us set up tea-tables after Tuesday�s Bible study. Which he attends regularly, mind. �Except,� Judy continued, �can we come to your house so he can take a shower first? He has to stop halfway to town to castrate a horse.� She said it as casually as you�d say you were making a stop to pick up milk. I generally don�t guffaw. I guffawed. Recovered, then asked, �Just like that? He drives up, grabs the horse, and starts slicing?� �Hey,� she said airily, �he already butchered twenty chickens this morning! We�re just going from chicken feathers to horse nuts. Nothing to it!� On the way to the church later the young man described the process more�ahem�precisely. Skip this if you�re sensitive. �You elevate the horse�s hindquarters with pulleys and ropes, tie the back legs together, slice open the bag, reach in, pull out the nuts, and close it back up,� he said. �Unless you�re cutting him �proud��then you cut a little further down. Lets the testosterone flow or something. That horse�ll still act like a stallion, but he won�t be breeding the mares.� I�ve yet to meet a man from the country who doesn�t make it plain, keep it simple, tell it true. A spade�s a spade, after all. But I�m more of a city slicker than I realized�the church showed up just in time. No children had arrived yet, so I put the young man to work. He fetched and carried while the ladies decorated and saw to the food. He even cut lilac stems, smashed them well with the bottom of a heavy green mug, and arranged the flowers in vases. Beautifully, too. Kidding with the women all the while. The Strawberry Tea was charming. But it�s the equine surgery lesson I�ll remember best. Oh, last night at our summer women�s ministry planning meeting, Judy mentioned that we have to change the date of our July function. She can�t make it. She has to drive her son to work because the airlines won�t let his guns on the plane. He�s a big-game hunting guide in the Yukon. I�d like all those men who think God and church are for sissies to meet this chicken killin�, stallion castratin�, lilac arrangin�, grizzly chasin�, babysittin�, church goin�, Bible readin�, plain talkin� Christian cowboy. One of the more remarkable men in my acquaintance. You can respond to this column at [email protected] |
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