| Sunny Side Up July 14, 2004 �2004, Kathleen Gibson Chomped, stomped, and rescued We've been showing the Preacher's mother and brother, visiting from Hamilton, our prairie sights. Things they can't see in the big city, like the pair of llamas at John and Elaine's place. We stood at the fence and called them. Joey, the youngest, came loping from the back of his pasture with the exuberance of an oversized pup. Like a too-familiar wedding guest, he stopped at each of us, showering the willing with kisses. Me, mainly. Now, you've never truly been kissed until a llama's done it. Joey's velvet lips flopped all over my face, my glasses, down my chin, over my cheek to my ear�.and the next thing I knew he'd snatched off one of my crescent-shaped, 10 karat gold earrings, a present from my sister. Chomping, he pulled his head back. Teeth clanked on metal. I panicked, grabbed that llama's neck, and startled wrestling. I even stuck my fingers into the side of his mouth. But like a stubborn child with a forbidden treat, Joey refused to surrender. I could see the earring in there, glinting as it swished between tongue and lips and teeth. Then it was gone. Slipped away without a single cough. Rats, I thought. That meant asking John to do some gold mining in Joey's 'products' the next day. If he found the thing, I could at least add it to my 'useless gold' collection, waiting for enough rainy day funds to have something useful fashioned from them. I wondered how to tell my sister� "Beverly, I was making out with a llama the other day, and he got a tad amorous while nibbling on my ear�." "What's that on the ground?" my brother-in-law, Neil, asked suddenly. Between Joey's dancing hooves, flattened out of shape, chewed grass puree crammed tightly in all the creases, lay what remained of my gold earring. Clearly, it hadn't suited his taste. Neil grabbed a pitchfork. Fished the earring from behind the fence, inspected it, and grinned. "Hey, offer him the other one too! You'd have a matched pair." It did look rather artsy, I thought, fiddling with the wire clasp. With a little bending it still closed. I wasn't about to let Joey at the other earring - this time he might swallow. But Neil was onto something. At home, pliers in hand, I laid the good earring on the counter and started hammering, imitating Joey's teeth marks. A helpful (Very Large) someone suggested I chew on it myself. I ignored him. I quite like the results. I have an entirely new pair of earrings - likely the only authentic llama-hammered gold earrings in the universe. I plan to wear them. Often. If poor choices and the circumstances of life have caught you in the jaws of destruction, left you in the muck, know this: God specializes in rescuing his original designs, no matter how chomped and stomped. If you're willing to be reshaped, he will make something entirely new. I've seen it. Let him pick you up. You can respond to this column at [email protected] |
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