12 Months...
Chapter One
2003
Alex waited patiently as she looked around the small room that consisted of nothing but a table that was right in front of her and two chairs, on one she was sitting at and the other was directly in front of her. She had seen many a rooms like that in her life. The interrogation room where on one wall was a huge mirror that served as a window to those who were peering at her. If anyone had told her that morning that Assistant District Attorney of New York City would be in that room waiting to be interrogated. Then she would have laughed at their faces. But now the truth was staring at her face just as unknown numbers of people were staring at her from behind the.
The door opened and a lean woman in black shapely cut business suit walked in with a black file.
�Hi! Ms. Cabot my field code name is Gem, and I will be your Contact.� She said before she even sat down.
Alex stared at her as though the woman had spoken in some foreign language.
�Let me brief you on the situation then you�ll understand the reason for me being here.� She opened the file in front of her and started to pull out some papers and put them in front of Alex.
�You Ms. Cabot will be entering Federal Witness Protection Program. The case you were working on has exposed some key players of the drug ring you were working on. Unfortunately you have exposed yourself to them too, in the process. There is already a hit out for you that you may already be aware of as you were shot only couple of hours ago. We were informed that the hit put on you was by Caesar Valez. The only way to keep you and your family and friends safe at this point is by entering the Witness Protection Program.�
She pointed to the pages that were facing Alex and put her gold parker pen on top of the first one. �You need to sign next to the crosses.�
Alex had heard every word the woman who called herself Gem had said but they hadn�t really registered enough to make any sense to her yet.
�Listen I know this might be a shock, especially since you were just shot not even couple of hours ago. But the thing to remember here is that you are alive, and if you want to stay alive and if you want the people you know to stay alive you need to sign those papers and let me give you a new life and new identity.� The black suited woman for the first time looked up from her file and at the woman in front of her. �This is how it will work. Your family and friends will be told that you died when you got shot. Then we will give you a new identity and new life in exchange for the files and evidence you have collected. Once you sign those papers I�ll be your sole contact between you and the government. You�ll not trust no one and you�ll not talk to no one. You need anything to get you settled in the new life you contact me. Just me. Are we clear?�
�No.� Alex answered bluntly.
�Look I can understand the dilemma, but take my words this is the only way. Even though it might seem like you have a choice right now but you don�t.�
�No, I am not giving up my life. I don�t care if they kill me. I can have police protection.�
�As I was told you were in the company of cops when you were shot.�
�Yes, but they didn�t know. Now, they will know and they�ll protect me.�
�For how long? For how many people? You think you can have police protection for everyone you know.� She took out couple of papers from the file and laid it on the table. �This is your file Ms. Cabot. It lists everyone you ever came across with in your life. Some of them for such a brief moment that even you will take some time to remember their names even if they stood right in front of you. Every one of their names and addresses is here. If we have it they have it. One by one they�ll go after them.�
Alex stared at the papers on top of the ones that needed signing.
�People never go to Witness Protection because they want to save themselves. Death is a better option than to loose one�s life. But they go in it for the people in their life. Now, some of those names may not hold a place in your heart but I know one of the names there, is of your mother and your sister. Your sister is married; she might have a kid one day. That day will never be if these people go after her.� The Agent outlined one of the scenarios.
�I don�t know.� Alex was flipping through the paper that supposedly outlined her life.
�You have to sign fast. We can�t hold your family and friends in the waiting room of the hospital forever, especially since some of your friends are cops.�
It was the MOST important decision of Alex�s life, but of course the government did not have the time to waste on her.
�I don�t know. I can�t. I can�t just disappear. I have worked so hard for everything. Now, I am at a point that, I can actually�� Alex wasn�t really saying it to anyone in particular rather she was actually saying it to herself aloud trying to make sense of the whirlwind that had started in her mind. �I don�t know. There might be some way.� She looked up from papers and at the woman in front of her hoping�
�No, there is no other way. They don�t call on us if there was any other way.�
The cold eyes that refused to betray any emotion shattered any hope that Alex might even try and hope. The woman did not even think about the effect she was having on Alex. After all that was her job, to severe any ties that her charge had to their life so that they could make the transition. Over the years she had got good at it too. She knew every trick in the book to make sure that her charge knew that the only way for them was to sign those two papers in front of them. Sometimes when she was lucky she got charges who were already scared shitless that they were more than willing to sign, but then every once in a while she would get someone like the one right in front of her. One who usually were the good guys who had worked their ass off all their life to get where they had got, and who would even cry if they had to have a garage sale, so forget about leaving everything behind. But, Gem was called there for a reason. If there was anyone who could make Ms. Cabot sign those papers and save the government a whole lot of headache trying to protect people around her then that would be her.
�I know what you are saying is right, but you don�t understand�� Alex was trying to defend something that she herself hadn�t decided yet.
�I do understand Ms. Cabot. I have done this for enough people to understand what you are going through. That is why I can tell you that there is no other option for you than to sign those papers.�
Alex took her bio in her hand once again and the names of her family, her friends and her colleagues jumped out as each names and the faces behind the name made it easier to make her decision.
That was of course till her eyes fell on one name, one name that made it impossible to pick up the pen in front of her. She stared at that name for the longest time and dropped the papers and looked up.
�No, I won�t do it.�
Alex looked directly at Agent Gem almost daring the woman to say anything so that she can brush it aside and stick to her decision.
Just then an almost identically dressed man walked inside the room and whispered something in Gem�s ears and she excused herself and walked out.
�What the fuck is happening?� A black man toweringly tall screamed as soon as Gem entered the room that was on the other side of the looking glass.
�You tell me Cabbie you said she was a single woman with basically nothing happening in her life and now she is even willing to kill her family for her life. What does she have in her life she is not willing to let go?� Gem was the one doing the screaming now.
�May be you are not going at her strong enough. We don�t have time to waste; I already got three calls from the hospital. A gun shot operation doesn�t take this long.� The man referred as Cabbie was pulling out some papers out of a thick file. �Who is it that she doesn�t want to leave?� He asked handing Gem the copy of the same paper that Alex was holding before she had made her decision.
�I don�t know Cab, she is too damn smart to act this stupid.� Gem scanned the page quickly but with no interest. �I mean for people like her she should be able to figure out herself. I shouldn�t even have had to say anything and she is now acting completely stupid.�
�So, when are smart people stupid?� Cabbie asked aloud.
�If you ask me only two times are the smart people real stupid. Either when they are falling in love or when they are falling out of love.�
�She is not dating anyone to be falling in love. Is she dating anyone Junior?� He asked the young Agent who had earlier interrupted Agent Gem. As soon as he heard the older man, he walked up to the computer and started to type in few things.
�No, she is not dating anyone. No reservations made for two, not even for business or colleagues.�
�You don�t have to be dating someone. Just pull up all friends and colleagues, let�s look at who our Ms. Cabot might be pinning for.� Gem instructed.
�Most of the men that are her friends are either married or have someone in their lives. There are few detectives that are in her unit that are single.� He said as the picture of John Munch with his bio on the side was displayed on the computer screen. Gem scanned through the bio quickly and made an assessment that it wasn�t the man. Then the picture of Captain Cargen appeared and Gem made the same assessment. After going through almost all the eligible men in Alex�s life, Gem stared at the computer for a long second before she spoke.
�Pull out anyone who has shared her address anytime for any duration in the last five years.� Gem instructed.
The young man typed for couple of second yet the screen remained blank.
�Go back more, try and find anyone she has shared address with.� Gem said.
�What are you doing? Looking for her ex boyfriends? I thought we needed to find who she was falling for now, not before.� Cabbie complained but before he could come up with another feasible search the screen showed up two names. �Look what the cat dragged in.� He said instead staring at the names on the screen.
�Both are women.� Junior concluded looking at the screen.
�Our Ms. Cabot is gay.� Gem said with a smile of triumph on her face.
�Now Junior, do the same search; except this time find eligible women.� Agent Cabbie instructed.
Gem let the pictures slide by one by one as it got clicked next after every ADA or lawyers that Alex worked with and through almost all of her friends.
�Stop.� Gem said staring at the picture on the screen. �I can�t believe it.�
�You think that�s her.� Junior asked.
�God! I know her. I must have gone through her bio like a hundred times, and I can�t believe I missed her name. Now, you said she wasn�t dating right?� Gem asked as a plan was formulating in her mind.
�It doesn�t seem like she is. I mean she hardly goes out. Her credit card statement ��
�That�s ok.� Gem cut the younger man�s reply and looked at her partner. �Well, Cabie call the hospital and tell them to pronounce her dead.�
�Gem you know I can�t do that without her signed consent.�
�Don�t worry, she�ll sign it.�
Alex knew that the safest and the right thing to do were to go into the Witness Protection Program and let her self disappear into the oblivion. But, she just could not.
Why? Because in all the time that she had had, she hadn�t even attempted to go for one thing that her heart had been falling for so long. At that moment she didn�t even know if she stood a chance at achieving it or not. But no matter how much of danger it was for her to stay as her, she needed her life to see it through. She knew she needed to see it through.
Gem walked in just as she had the first time but this time she made it a point to look at Alex.
�You are a smart woman. I just can�t understand what would make a smart woman like you make a very stupid choice like that.� Gem said once she was seated.
�I don�t care what you say. I am willing to co-operate fully with the government, but I�ll not let myself die.� Alex snapped.
�Not even if they kill your mom, and they will. Or your sister. Forget them let�s just see who else they would kill.� Gem pulled the paper that she had earlier given to Alex. �They could kidnap your Uncle Bill�s son, or just kill them. Why just family, you think they will care who they kill to shut you up? Detective Stabler has four kids. He may be just a colleague but they will not care. You know even if you decide not to help the government they will still come after you�
Alex didn�t even flinch at the mention of any of the names or the outcome that Gem predicted. She was an ADA she knew that Gem was just trying to break her. Whatever she said wouldn�t necessarily be true. It was the worst case scenarios and right then Alex wanted to take her chances.
�Well, Ms. Cabot I didn�t figure you to be stupid but it is a voluntary program so there is nothing else I can say.� Gem said as she started to gather her papers.
Cabbie took a step closer to the glass as he wondered what his partner was up to.
Gem put most of the papers back inside the file and was just about to close it when she stopped.
�Olivia Benson.� She read out loud as she widened her eyes in a surprise. �I must have gone through your file almost a hundred times and I can�t believe I didn�t catch her name.�
Alex kept her eyes steady refusing to react.
�She made detective huh. She always wanted to be one.� Gem took the paper back out of the file as she pretended to read the information. �SVU� Special Victims Unit, well at least she got what she wanted. She always said SVU was the reason she wanted to be cop because of her past�forget that.�
True to Gem�s assessment no sooner were the words out of her mouth; Alex�s guards were down.
�How do you know Olivia?� Alex asked against her better judgments but her better judgments usually took a hike whenever Olivia was concerned.
�Oh from the Academy class of 1990.� Gem took a second to answer before going back to her pondering. �God! I used to have the biggest crush on her.� Gem made it a point not look at Alex as she continued. �The moment I saw her, I knew I was falling for her. Only if she wasn�t straight�� Gem was nodding her head as though the disappointed was still fresh in her heart. �If she was a little curious too I wouldn�t have cared at that moment, I was that crazy about her, but damn she just had to be the straightest woman in the world.�
Gem took couple of second to let her words sink in then she looked up at Alex whose confidence had already evaporated.
�Anyway good luck Ms. Cabot, I wish I could tell you my name so that you could convey my hello to Liv.� Gem said extending her hand, which Alex took but didn�t let go.
�Tell me Agent Gem �� Alex�s heart that had earlier ruled her thoughts was now limping back with pain; as her head started to slowly but firmly take over.
�Gem, please.� Gem insisted with a soft smile.
�So, Gem you really think they�ll go after everyone I know.�
�They are criminals.�
Cabbie�s smile was widening as he watched his partner take the papers back out and the golden parker pen ready in Ms. Cabot�s hand.
�God how do you even manage all these kids, Chris?� Gina was saying as she watched her goddaughter play with her friends on the lawn as she sipped beer with her oldest and dearest friend.
�Oh! It�s not about managing, I enjoy it.� Chris was smiling even though it was clear on her face that she was tired.
�Where is that moron of a husband of yours?� Gina asked even though she knew he was never there.
�I don�t know G, and I have given up on trying to know. All I care about now is Sarah and as long as she is happy I am happy.� Chris sighed hard.
�Well, if nothing I thought he was a good father.� Gina knew that Chris�s marriage had failed long time ago but somehow she just never wanted to talk about it or let her friend talk to her about it.
�Yep, he is a good father. He sent some people to install the new swing set for her birthday, and you can see how happy Sarah is.� Chris confirmed Gina�s statement knowing that Gina needed to believe that more than she did.
�So where were you this time? Or is it too classified to tell me?� Chris decided to change the subject as she knew Gina certainly never had asked her more about her absent husband and she never wanted to know more.
�I was actually in New York.� Gina replied.
�Good old New York. How is our old city?� Chris asked.
�It�s the same you know. It�s a lot more cleaned up after Giuliani cleaned up the whole 42nd street.�
�Yeah that�s a good thing he did.�
�I came upon a name we knew.� Gina said trying to make it sound unimportant.
�Yeah, whose?�
�Olivia�� Gina took a long sip of her beer. �Olivia Benson.�
Chris just looked at her daughter playing with her friend refusing to react to the name. Gina turned to her friend and knew right away that even after over a decade the name wasn�t a welcome thought.
�Well, I�ll make my move, I am still in a middle of a case, and I came just for Sarah�s birthday.� Gina said getting up.
�Okay, but now don�t go all FBI Agent on me and disappear again. Keep in touch.� Chris was back to warning and threatening her friend.
�I will.� Gina said as she walked up to her goddaughter and kissed her good bye.
As soon as she was in her car her cell phone rang.
�Gem.� Gina answered the phone.
�Gem, look Ms. Cabot insists on seeing her girlfriend and her partner before going into hiding. I told you not to go; she is turning into a fucking stubborn bitch after you left.� Gina listened to her partner.
�This was important Cab.� Gina said and contemplated for a second before she answered. �Let her see them.�
�It�s your case, it�s your call but are you sure about it. I mean the whole point about Witness ��
�I know the whole point about Witness Protection shit, let her see them.�
�Whatever you say Gem.� Cabbie answered before he hung up.
�Why is this 740? This is not supposed to be a 740�� Gem certainly wasn�t happy with what her partner had to say when she had reached the little motel where they were temporarily based.
�It�s a 740 now.� Cabbie simply repeated his previous statement as he handed the photographs to Gina aka Agent Gem. �They were digging up her grave last night. Now, that could have been because they like to be extra careful or that they know she is not dead.�
Gem flipped through the black and white high-resolution pictures of four men in the process of digging up a grave.
�It�s a 740 now and she is all yours.� Cabbie said as he put down the folder. �Good luck baby sitting her, she is one hell of a stubborn bitch.� He warned just before he walked out.
Even though Alex had agreed to go into permanent hiatus she had refused to do so without at least having to see Olivia once. It was true that knowing that Olivia was straight and she would never love her the way she wanted her to love her back, knowing that truth made it easier to sign those papers that more or less snatch her life from her own hands, but certainly did not make it painless. The normally strong and sturdy looking ADA Cabot�s eyes hadn�t stopped crying since she had written her own name for the last time.
�Hi!� Gem said peeking in from the door. �How you feeling?�
�I am crying for my own funeral, so I don�t know how to tell you how I am feeling.� Alex snapped back as though Gem was the demon she had sold her soul to. �But because you have done it for enough people so I am sure you don�t care how I feel.�
�This is a job Ms. Cabot, I am sure you had to do some dirty laundry in your job as well.�
Gina put the box that she was carrying down and set up a laptop and small printer on the armor next to the bed.
�There has been a change of plan. I don�t know what you know or what you have against these goons but they want you dead and they are taking great care to make sure you are dead. What that means is that I am going to be your new best friend till these goons are completely off your back.�
Gina looked up from her laptop and flashed an artificial smile but her hands remained on the keyboard.
�So, as new best friends lets at least be on first name basis, so what would your new name to be?�
�You mean I can choose my own name?�
�Yes. First name, last name middle name, it can be anything you want.�
�Can I choose where I live and what I do too?� Alex asked finding a little excitement in the fact that she might have a say in her new life.
�No, that I�ll be choosing, but don�t worry as your best friend I�ll make sure you like it.� Gem flashed her smile again as though Alex was a kid in a doctor�s office to whom every nurse smiled at so that the kid wouldn�t cry.
�Where is that going to be?�
�Right now, just on the run. Like I said change of plan, some people want to make sure that you are dead. I put you up somewhere they might be able to track you. It has happened before so there is a code 740 for you. That means you and I wander about changing names and identity, while the Feds track the people down who is tracking us.�
Alex remained silent wondering how to react to the new information. She already knew that she was in danger but she didn�t know if she was to be more shocked knowing that she was in more danger than previously thought.
�It�s no big deal. Sometime it takes days, and sometimes couple of month, but it�s not bad, think of it like a tour. Now, let�s have a name for you.�