dedicated to the B-team on the forum. ladies, we are ron's angels.

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The morning sun shines though the windows of the beach cottage. A gaggle of girls sits on the couch, dressed in cute trendy bits, beautific smiles on their faces. The clock chimes the hour and with a small crackling sound, a dashing bloke's red head appears in the fire.

"Good morning, Angels." His voice is rich and mellow.

"Good morning, Ron!"

"How have you been doing lately, darlings?"

"Smashing!" Claireyfairy1 says Britishly.

"Fantastic." He smiles gorgeously. "And what have you been up to?"

Allison goes first, as always. "I designed a gazillion brilliant new icons."

"Yes, I saw them. Very nice." Allison blows on her fingers then polishes them on her shirt.

ShellyK speaks up cheerfully. "I accidentally accused a member of committing lewd acts with a shower."

Invisblegrl pipes up. "Yeah, you horndog."

Ron shakes his head, an indulgent smile on his face. "ShellyK, we've talked about letting your libido run away with you."

ShellyK doesn't look the least bit embarrassed. "Yeah, I know. But I’m the Checkmated Goddess!" She flexes impressively.

Claireyfairy1 speaks next, blushing. "I published my first--- well, you know … smutty story."

He chuckles. "No need to fret about it, Angel; I rather enjoyed it."

She blushes harder. "Oh!"

ThaliaChaunacy re-adjusts her red bowler hat. "I said w00t a lot."

He raises an eyebrow at her. "Without knowing what it means, am I right?"

"Aww, suck it." ThaliaChaunacy scowls, then winks. Ron winks back.

Sunshyndaisies looks happily at him. "I got worshipped for another War & Passion outtake."

"Of course you did, Angel! It was bloody brilliant" Sunshyndaisies squees.

"It's spring!" Hypancistrus blurts out, overcome with joy.

"Not in Britain," Ron says ruefully.

"Oy, it is too spring in Britain!" Claireyfairy1 injects vehemently. Ron raises an eyebrow at her. She shrugs. "Well, sort of…"

RedBlaze nudges Clairyfairy1. "Don't listen to her, she's just a twitterpated fangirl."

Said fangirl looks sheepish and rushes to explain. "See, I started this group for—" She puts her chin up, determined not to be embarrassed. "—for smut writers and beta-readers."

"And it's quite fun, is it not?" Ron says smoothly.

Claireyfairy1 brightens. "Yes! Loads!"

"Then quit being so dodgy about it. Go on."

"Dodgy my arse!" RedBlaze nudges her again to get her back on topic. "Oh, right. Then RedBlaze joined and I nearly fainted because she's my fanfic goddess—"

"I object!" ShellyK breaks in. "That's my official nickname! You know, the one above my avatar that I get because I'm special!"

Allison pokes ShellyK. "That's smut goddess, you silly Canadian."

"All right, all right," Ron breaks in. "Next?"

MiserysAngel sighs schmoopily. "I made out with Allison's Sirius picture and used the word 'craptastic' successfully…though not in the same day…"

"I should think not."

Chickadilly erupts into giggles. "I win! I had a dream about HP & Anne of Green Gables!" ThaliaChaunacy, Allison, and Invisblegrl break into riotous laughter.

"I volunteered to interview quidditch players in the locker rooms after matches," Cressida contributes. "Or be a cheerleader, one or the other."

"The cheerleading skirt sounds appealing."

Cressida squees. "Ron! What would your wife say?"

Hermione's voice echoes from somewhere behind Ron. "Don't worry about it, Cress. He's just being the lad he is."

Cressida, understanding the Britishism, grins. "Thanks, Hermione."

Invisblegrl gets a wicked glint in her eye. "I tricked everyone into thinking Harry and Hermione got it on in my story."

Ron snorts. "Not bloody likely."

"Well, duh! But it was fun."

Amelia looks at Ron timidly. "I—I got converted to LeatherPants!Draco."

Allison immediately jumps to her defense. "Hey, yeah, don’t blame her; I drew it." Ron gives her a Look. She purses her lips. "I can't help it if he's hot. Besides," she says quickly, "my PostShower!Ron picture thoroughly distracted everyone from LeatherPants!Draco."

Ron grins. "Ah, yes. Quite nice, if I do say so myself."

"Quite," Allison says dreamily, and the rest of the Team swoons at the thought of said PostShower!Ron.

Ron chuckles. "Have any problems I can perhaps help with?"

Allison rolls her eyes. "We still have eighty-seven stories in the queue."

Ron looks around inquisitively. "Are my Angels not doing their job?"

A chorus of complaints arises.

"—I emailed the author seven times, I swear I did—"

"—I'm a senior in college with four majors, I don't have that much time—"

"—I have a seven thousand page paper due on internet laws—"

"—I have five jobs, I'm too exhausted to just—"

He clears his throat and the melee halts. "All right, all right. I know you're doing your best. Just relax, all right? It'll get done. The world will keep turning." He looks around sternly. "Anything else?"

Everyone looks at ShellyK expectantly. She bites a fingernail and tries to look innocent. "Weeeellll…"

"Yes?"

Allison elbows ShellyK, then loses patience. "She thinks she should take down Sugar Quills!"

Ron frowns. "Why in blazes would you have to do that?"

ShellyK sighs. "Well, there's this thing," she begins, spouting very complex legal jargon, "and if Hermione's not old enough to be doing the hanky panky, then I could possibly get in a lot of trouble."

Ron looks confused. "But the age of consent is sixteen."

The rest of the girls groan. "Not in Canada," ShellyK mutters sheepishly.

"Ah," Ron says sagely. "And how do the rest of you feel about this?"

"I started a picket line," Allison says proudly

"And I joined!" chimes in Hypancistrus.

"And me!" says Invisblegrl. "I made signs!"

ThaliaChaunacy smirks. "I led everyone in 'we shall overcome'."

Ron chuckles. "Nice pun." ThaliaChaunacy bows.

Claireyfairy1 joins in. "I picketed too! And Archancellor (he's a boy!) opened a hamburger stand, but we're not sure how that works into this… And Dindranesdefender (another boy, can you believe it?) just had to go and get violent with the authorities when Allison started chanting 'hell no, we won't go'--"

Allison cuts in triumphantly. "But I brilliantly saved the day by putting forth a theory about wizard time."

ShellyK looks pleadingly at Ron. "Just say she's right and I'll leave it up."

"She's right," Ron says quickly.

Hermione's voice comes through again. "Don't lie, Ron."

Ron sighs. "Well, technically, she's right and wrong. Hermione is younger than Harry or me." The group looks despondently at him.

Allison protests. "But—Dumbledore's watch has little planets on it! Wizard time is different than Muggle time!"

There's a bit of a scuffle, then Hermione's head pops into the fire in place of Ron's. "You're right, Allison. Very keen of you." She looks as if she's going to launch into a scientific explanation, and Allison looks rapt for the lecture, but Ron clear his throat meaningfully and Hermione shrugs. "Some other time, dear."

"All right, Hermione." Allison waves. "See you later."

"Bye, Hermione!" The rest of the girls wave too and Ron's head comes back into view.

"So that problem's solved, right? Is that all for now, Angels?" They nod.

He smiles. "Well, then, you'd best get back to that stuffed queue."

There's a chorus of sighs. "Yes, Ron."

"And all of you, keep writing! I look forward to each and every chapter."

Giggles are heard all around.

"Goodbye, Angels."

"Goodbye, Ron!"

And with that, he disappears.

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stay tuned for the next adventure!