Part of The Jim and June "Lurve" Collection by jimsgirl
Outline: June Ackland and Jim Carver are seeing each other, and things are getting serious, until one day it looks like everything could change�.one way or another.
**
"Jim, please, just STOP it!" June Ackland glared at her partner across the kitchen table. "I've told you, it's just a check up. I'm fine�" She reached across and touched his hand.
"I'm sorry." His puppy-eyes ducked downward. "I worry about you, you know that."
"I know that." June caught Jim's gaze in hers. "If there was anything wrong, Jim�I'd tell you. Trust me on that." A nod. "I've got to go. Remind Matt I'll be late." June stood, slipped into her jacket then kissed Jim lightly on the cheek. "I love you."
"Yeah. Me too."
**
"OW!!" Jim yelled as the woman sunk her unnaturally sharp teeth into his hand. "You little�" He lost some of his grip on her struggling form and Des Taviner moved in and took control.
"People like this shouldn't be allowed to breed!" He muttered. "You alright, Jim?"
"Yeah�" Jim sucked his hand ruefully. "Just need my shots backing up."
"Sierra Oscar 600, receiving over?"
"600 receiving."
"Jim�.Social Services are backed right up. They can't get to you for another hour at least."
"Oh�great." Jim looked to the two month old baby being cradled in a neighbours arms. "Then what are we supposed to do with the kid?"
"The Sarge says bring her back here. So she'll be near her mum if she needs feedin' or, whatever." Polly offered.
"Right. OK. All received."
Jim approached the woman, explained the situation in low, calm tones, then took the baby into his own arms. "She'll be fine." He reassured her.
"I know she will." The woman smiled. "You're a natural."
**
Craig Gilmore glanced up as June mooched into the office. He could immediately sense she wasn't her usual self, but decided not to comment. "What's wrong?"'s usually met with a "Nothing" in reply.
"Morning June."
"Craig."
"Thought you might want to know. Jim's in with FME, he�."
Before Craig had a chance to continue, June had pivoted and had run from the room.
**
"Jim!" June opened the door without even knocking, and felt foolish when she saw Jim looking on as the doctor examined the baby girl.
"Ju�Sarge!"
"Jim�are you alright?"
"Fine. Thanks. Sarge."
"So�.um�" June tried to gather herself into some semblance of authority. "What's this then?"
"This�" Jim gestured to the baby who was gurgling and kicking on the examining table, "..is Christabelle Allen. Mum's just been done for dealing. Found this little sweetheart�" He reached over, grabbed one of the baby's flailing feet and tickled it. "This little sweetheart was found in her cot, filthy bedding, covered in sick, and�" Jim's face bunched up and turned red for a moment. "Social Services are coming, but they're backed up."
"All done." The FME snapped off her latex gloves. "She's a little undernourished, a few small bruises but nothing substantial. She'll need a thorough looking over at St Hughs, x-rays, blood tests and the like, but Social Services can organise that."
"Thank you." June saw the FME out as Jim scooped baby Christabelle up into his arms.
When June turned back to face him, Jim couldn't help but grin. "Had you in a panic, did I?"
"Yes�you�" Belatedly June noticed the plaster on Jim's hand. "What happened?"
"Little Chrissie's mummy bit me."
"Ow." June smiled and approached the pair. "You did have me worried there for a moment."
Jim looked up at her. "Sorry. How are you - the doctors?"
"Oh, fine. You won't be getting rid of me that easily."
"Thank god." Jim gazed at June for a while, then looked back to the baby. "Would you like to hold her?"
"No�I�you look like you're doing fine." June bustled momentarily, unsure as what to say next, then turned without a word and left the room.
***
Tony Stamp found June slumped over a coffee in the canteen. He bought himself a tea and a bacon roll, then walked over to her table.
"Mind if I sit down?"
"No�no�" June avoided making eye contact with Tony and sniffed loudly. It didn't take long for Tony to deduce that she had been crying.
"Sarge�whassup?"
"Nothing�.it's just stupid." She dug a tissue out of a pocket and blew her nose loudly.
"Has Jim�.he hasn't upset you, or�" Tony looked immediately militant. Nobody hurt his Sarge, his friend and got away with it - not even Jim Carver, her partner.
"No�.no it's me�I got some bad news today, and�"
"And what?"
"You wouldn't understand."
Tony placed a hand on June's. "Try me."
"You wouldn't. But�I think it's over. Between me and Jim."
"I thought you said he hadn't upset you?"
"He hasn't! He wouldn't�he would never�.I think I need to end it with him�for his own sake�so he won't get hurt�"
"June�." Tony stood, circled the table and joined June on the opposite side, where he placed an arm around her. "June, I've never known two people as much in love as you and Jim. You could never hurt him�"
"I could. And I will, if�if we carry on, as we are�"
"But why?"
"Because�.because Jim deserves better than me. He deserves more than me."
Tony's face creased into a frown. "Does he think this?"
"No, but he will�.when I tell him�."
Tony hugged her tighter. "You don't know that. You don't know how he'll react. Whatever this is, you can't keep it from him�"
"I don't want to lose him, but�"
"He has to know." June nodded. "June, you have to tell him. Whatever it is." Tony paused, then chuckled. "He's a big boy. He can take it."
"He�."
"No arguments." Tony glanced up as Polly Page and Cathy Bradford entered the canteen. "Girls?"
They wandered over, immediately concerned when they noticed June's tears. "Wassup?" Polly inquired.
"Pol, can you stay here with June? Don't let her go anywhere."
"OK�"
"And Cathy, you're coming with me."
"Where?"
"To find Jim."
***
"Mate, she's crying."
"Crying?" Jim was feeding baby Christabelle, and he looked up in shock. "What's wrong?"
"She wouldn't tell me."
"Well, I�" Jim held up the half empty bottle. "Can someone�."
Cathy shuddered. "Don�t look at me. I don't have a maternal bone in my body."
Tony's eyes widened then he nodded. "Alright. Alright. But not for long."
"Thanks, Tone." Jim gently passed the baby into Tony's strong arms. "Social Services should be here soon anyway�don�t forget to make sure they take Fluffy." He gestured to a fluffy blue rabbit on a plastic chair.
"I won't."
***
Jim more or less crashed through the canteen doors, but slowed when he saw June being comforted by Polly Page, who gazed at him accusatorily.
"You want me to stay, Sarge?"
June swallowed. "No."
"OK. But I'll be right outside. If you wanna talk." Polly stood, glared at Jim one last time for good measure, and left the canteen.
"June�?" Jim felt unsure as to whether he should sit or remain standing, or hug her, or hold her�
"Jim�I�." She sucked in a deep breath, looked up at him, and in a single, determined rush, said: "I'm sorry, Jim, but it's over."
Jim began to wish he had decided to sit down, as he felt his legs buckle beneath him. "Over?"
"Yes. I'm sorry."
"Sorry?" Jim approached the table. "Is that�is that all you've got to say?" He felt anger rising within him, and tried to hold it back, but his voice was noticeably louder, his tone unintentionally harsh.
"Yes, Jim, it's not�" She tried to make eye contact, couldn't when she saw the raw pain and confusion in his eyes. "..it's not going to work."
"And when did you decide this?" Jim's voice cracked.
"I've been�for a while, I�it's best for�.it's best for you, Jim. You don't need me."
Jim was stunned into silence for a moment. "How can you say that? You know just how much you mean to me!"
"Yes�but aren't there things, that mean more?"
"No�NO!" Jim slammed the palms of his hand against the table. "NOTHING means more to me than you! Nothing ever has and nothing ever will! June�"
"Jim�you're six years younger than me, you�there are�.things available to you, that�things you can have that I can never give you."
"I don't understand, I�" Jim circled the table, but June stood and backed away from him.
"If we�.say we get married, Jim�.you'll regret it. Sooner or later�you will regret it."
"NO!" Jim exploded, then bit his lip, and pulled in a quivering breath. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be shouting at you, but I really really do NOT understand why you're doing this to me. To US!"
"I am helping you!"
"NO!" Jim's eyes filled up with tears and they spilled over onto his cheeks. "How can you be helping me when you're breaking my heart?"
"Oh, Jim�." Seeing Jim's tears made June clasp a hand to her mouth and sob. "I have�.I have to do this! One day you'll�.you'll understand, and you'll thank me."
"I want to understand NOW!" Jim bore down on June, grabbed her arm.
"Jim�.Jim you're hurting me!"
Jim realised what he was doing pulled his hand away. "And you're hurting me. Can't you see that?" His tone lowered, and he wandered back to the table. He sat down, placed his head in hands and began to sob.
June watched this forlorn figure for a good two minutes.
God, she loved this man so much, so much she was willing to sacrifice her own happiness for him�
�but she couldn't bear to see him cry.
"Jim�Jim. It's�it's Christabelle. She's the�she's the reason."
Jim slowly raised his head, regarded her. "Christabelle?"
"I saw you with her�Jim�I know�.we've always been friends, and I know how you feel, about�about kids."
She returned to the table, sat opposite him.
"I know you've always wanted a family, kids of your own." June touched his arm lightly. "I went to the doctors this morning - I'd�I've missed a couple of periods. I knew that�." June laughed. "But some part of me kind of hoped that I was�.that I was pregnant."
"But you're not."
"No. And I'll never be. It's the change, Jim�.I�if I ever wanted children, which I didn't not really, until you�.it's too late."
Jim said nothing, waited for her to continue.
"So that's why�Jim, I know how much you want kids. And I can't give them to you. I can't give you one of the things you've always wished for. It's not fair on you�" Jim continued to look at her, his gaze unwavering. "Jim, say�something�"
"I can't�I can't believe�that you would�" Jim ran a hand through his short blond hair. "I can't believe that you would devalue what we have so easily. That you could think you could end it so easily!"
"It's not easy! It's anything but!"
"You call that a reason? You call that a reason�June!" Jim tipped his head back and laughed harshly. "Maybe you don't feel for me quite as much as I feel for you�maybe�" He was ranting, he stood, paced.
"I DO! You know I do! I'm doing this for you!"
"No you're not! Listen to me, June Ackland�I�.I LIVE for you. I would do anything for you and if I lost you it would kill me!"
June looked up as she heard movement at the door, she saw Polly, Tony, Craig, Matt and Andrew Monroe.
Monroe dealt a harsh "Jim�" in Jim's direction.
"No�it's OK�" June assured them, yet they stayed.
"Maybe once I wanted children. Maybe once. Maybe in a way, I still do, but�June�if pursuing a goal of having kids meant losing you�I couldn't. I wouldn't. You're my life. You're my soulmate." Jim took June's unresisting hand and pulled her up to meet him. "If you think you're going to get rid of me that easily�"
"I was just�"
"I know�I know." Jim placed a hand on June's face. "You wanted to do what you thought was best. But let me reassure you�.you are what is best for me. Now and forever."
Jim pulled June into his embrace. "Don't you ever doubt again how much I love you." He whispered.
"I don't, but�."
"No buts. No�" Jim pulled back, examined June at arm's length, then grinned. He sprinted over to the kitchen area, opened and checked a couple of boxes, then returned with a ring donut with pink icing and sprinkles.
"Jim�Jim�.what are you doing?"
"This. Something I should have done a long, long, time ago."
Slowly, and groaning elaborately, more for show than anything, he got down on one knee.
Ignoring a sudden gasp of realisation behind him from Polly Page, he looked up to June, took her hand in his once more.
"Sergeant June Ackland�.will you marry me?"
June gawped. Gasped. Then sobbed.
"Please?" Jim gazed up at her through damp blue puppy dog eyes.
"Of�.of course I will, you big idiot. Now get up before you get stuck like that."
"Not before I place the ring on your finger." Slowly, and with difficulty since June was laughing, sobbing and shaking, he slid the donut onto her finger.
Then, with a little help from June, he stood. "I love you, Sarge."
"I love you, Jimmy Carver�.."
"June�"
"Yes?"
"Are you going to be eating that donut or�."
June growled. "OK. You can have it. But the first thing I'll do when you're my husband is put you on a diet�."
THE END