An Open Letter

Dear Family and Friends, Warren and I are so happy to share the joy of our upcoming adoption of a little girl from China. We may have surprised some of you with this news, and maybe even intrigued you. Perhaps you have contemplated adoption, or have concerns for us about this decision. Hopefully, I can explain how we came to choose this road...less traveled.
We are asked pretty frequently about why we chose to adopt a baby from China, rather than here in the U.S. or some other country. The answer to that is a simple one for us...because we know our daughter is waiting for us in China. It is a hard thing to explain, but we just know.
We researched about domestic adoption, and very quickly came to the conclusion that it wasn't the right place for us at this time. The chance of a birthparent changing his or her mind would be devastating for us. Healthy, white babies that are available for adoption have many opportunities for placement with the abundance of waiting parents. Unfortunately, if you are open to a healthy infant of another race, our domestic system is not very supportive. We knew that we wanted a healthy child, as young as possible, and the world opened up to us. Where to look...the possibilities were endless. We really did our research and opened our hearts to many possibilities. When we looked at China, everything clicked. These babies are relatively healthy with very few incidents of drug or alcohol-related problems. Due to economic sanctions, overpopulation issues and a cultural preferences, many baby girls are available for adoption. There is the one-child policy in place in most of China. In a country roughly the size of the United States, China has approximately one-fourth of the world's population. The Chinese people do not have a Social Security or retirement system available to them. Poverty in many areas of China is astounding. The belief of most people, is one that holds a son responsible for the care of his parents in their old age. When a daughter marries, she joins her husband's family, and assumes the responsibility of taking care of his parents. Therefore, it is important for the well-being of the family to have a son. Her birthparents must have had hopes, dreams and expectations for their child. The devastating realization that you cannot keep your child is something unfathomable. I can't imagine the anguish of these birthparents when they feel that they must leave their daughter in a conspicuous place, watch as she is discovered, and walk away. It makes my heart hurt. Then typically, a search begins for the parents, it is a crime to abandon a child. The fear, worry and sadness must be overwhelming. However, the birthparents must believe that they are out of options. We want you to understand that we feel compassion for our daughter's birthparents. We ask that you please keep this in mind for our daughter's sake. We want Willow to feel proud of her heritage and know that she was loved from the very beginning. The circumstances involving her first days will handled in an open, honest and loving manner. When cultural differences are great, sometimes it is easy to disparage something foreign, that we can't begin to understand. We hope that you can accept our decision as if Willow was born to us, because she truly is a child born of our hearts. She is the most amazing valentine that we could give each other. We are honored to be able to adopt Willow, and we can only hope that her birthparents can find some peace, hoping that their child is loved and cared for. We will be forever grateful to China and her birthparents for this precious child. We feel blessed and hope that you will delight in welcoming Willow to our family. Love ~ Warren & Kelly