So So
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Wow
Sunday February 17, 2002
Hello. Im sorry I havent been writing, its just EVERY time I get on I totally forget! I am busy working on my web site (it is *N Sync and Britney, but there is a lot on me too!) it is geocities.com/sraeps_81. Yeah well LOTS going on in my head! He he he!
Yesturday I went to the mall to see the MISS USA dealgets do a fashion show and sign autographs and things, it was sooooo much fun! Yeah you see NOTHING ever happens around here always in Chicago and now since they started doing Miss USA in Gary (2 minutes away) we have been having more fun. I am not really into fashion and things but I always have and always will watch the beauty pagints. But the sad thing is INDIANA NEVER WINS!! Maybe this year, huh? Well we (my step dad. and two nieces) met 24 of them plus Miss USA herself, Kandace Krueger. It was soo much fun. We only met half because they had 2 lines and when we were done with the 1st line we had to get into the second line, but they closed the 2nd one down so we didnt get to meet them (and Indiana was on that side!). :( sad huh? Well it was fun over all!
Well I gots to gos now! Write more later!
Confused
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Okie dokie
Monday February 18, 2002
Well I am confused today, Im going through love problems. Well I am in love with many girls, which is hard, you know? Just because I am also a girl and none of them are gay. And just thinking of the fact that I have a horrible secret that they can NEVER find out (unless they are reading this!). But I like, here is a long list!: OK I wont say their names, WHAT??? YOU WANT ME TOO? Well then, dont be SOOOOOOOOOOO demanding, I will tell you a few of them! Ok, Erika (biggest secret)Taylor, and some other people, but that is ALL I am telling you!! Hehehehe!
Well I am having a BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG problem with church, just because I do belive in God and I love him with my whole heart, it is just that I know what the Bible says about homosexuality and it hurts inside to know that he will not love me as much as before. And also there is this mission trip I REALLY want to go on, but I just cant, Id feel too gulity, maybe even more guilty than I do now. But the pressure, the pain that is inside my heart for not only sinning against God, but also myself with my thoughts.
Gosh, and also living knowing that my family will HATE me forever. I already know how utterly distgusted my mother and David (step-father) are by homosexuality, but I dont understand why? Why if God dispised it, WHY would he put it in me? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? GOSHHHH
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Sick
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no title
Saturday February 2, 2002
I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SICK! No literaly, I am. I have asthma which is turning into broncitis (sp?) and I am in a house FILLED with cigarette smoke, which doesnt help much (ok it makes it worse) And I am tired, but I cant sleep. I slept this much last night. URGHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE IT!!!
Well I do have some stuff I want to get off my mind. You want to know something funny? I bet you do!! :) hehehe. OK then I will tell you. I have a crush on my step brother and step sister! Isnt that hillarious? I thought so! Im such a nerd.
Well I will talk about my diferences now.
Well I am different because I like girls and guys, I wear guy jeans and mostly t-shirts (yeah sexy, huh?) but I have the body (as in breasts and a butt) that most girls would kill for. Also I wear baseball caps and bandannas most of the time, I HATE makeup, doing my hair, and getting dressed up!!!! The only girly quality in me is i like dolls (yes, I said dolls) But I do! and I like *N Sync. But I am leaning more towards rock now actually. I like No Doubt and Linkin Park. I like Alien Ant Farm also but I have yet to buy their cd.
Well right now I am REALLY excited! Why you ask? Because Britney Spears (I AM A HUGE FAN) is hosting SNL again and Justin Timberlake was just on, and I LOVE HIM AND BRITNEY! I am soooooo happy! Well I have to go now and finish watching SNL BYE BYE BYE, TATA FOR NOW!
Confused
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First
Friday February 1, 2002
UHHHHHHHHHHH. Hello. How are you? Well I am O.K. I supose. This is my first entry so try and bare with me on this! Incase you were wondering my picture (the legs) stand for Angelina Jolies character in Foxfire.
Well I am a bisexual female and my loves are Angelina Jolie and Justin Timberlake.
I know in my life, I will never be accepted by anyone in my life. Only one friend knows about my sexual prefrences. I know this because I am a Baptist, therefore all my friends (and family) is against homosexuality. Life is hard and terrifying right now. I dont know how to live or what to say. I am just so confused. I dont know what to do.
Well, maybe I will add more later, but ta-ta for now!