I worked as a patrol officer for about (8) years, working in the youth services detail and dealing with street gangs and in a community policing project. I have also worked as a detective for about (16) years. I have been in several different assignments. They include sexual assaults, child exploitation, narcotics, sexual predator task-force, burglary detail. I was also case officer on several special investigations dealing with organized crime, public corruption, serial rape and officer involved criminal activity. I was assigned to the department's Crisis Management Unit and assisted in mental health issues for a time. I am currently assigned as a burglary detective, but will be rotating back to a patrol assignment within the next few months.
Police work has been an exciting career for me. I have had opportunities which I would never have had, doing any other kind of work. If you can't tell, I am somewhat of a cheerleader for my agency and this job.
I have four children, two step-children and an adopted daughter, all whom I love very much. They mean the world to me. As a parent, I have learned the meaning of family; an endearing quality that I both respect and promote. We have no greater resource than our children. What we do with them, how we raise them and guide them, will shape our world.
With all of that being said, I have been dealing with other issues in my personal life, which have been a struggle for me. About (5) years ago I disclosed that I am transsexual. This revelation and the aftermath of my "transition" cost me the love of my spouse and best friend. The other costs, were financially devestating, yet more bearable. The condition is called Gender Identity Disorder. I hid this condition from my family, my friends and my co-workers, for the majority of my life. I came to a point where I was overwhelmed with the disorder and came to the realization that I needed to be true to myself.
I "transitioned" into life as a woman over (2 1/2) years ago, and have continued working as a police officer during that time. It was a difficult, yet liberating expereince. I lost so much, yet have truely gained insight about the world that I would never would have expereinced.
In November 2003 I travelled to Phuket, Thailand for gender reassignment surgery. It was a mixed experience filled with emotion; happiness at my comfort with my anatomy and feelings of self contentment, but also a sense of loss of my marraige and the love that I have for my spouse. She is a wonderful person and I wish her the best that this world has to offer.
My children continue to struggle with my change of gender. They may not understand it but even my ten year old son reminds me, "It's not what is on the outside. It is who you are on the inside that we love."
My journey has not been an easy one. I had come to grips that I need to let go of some of the people, whom I care for more than anyting else in this world. It is difficult, but as the year changes and I learn to accept my future, I am excited to look ahead. I hope to find that kind of happiness once again..God willing.
My New Year's Resolution for 2004, is to be good to myself; allow me to be comfortable with me and to look for the lost treasures of my life. They are out there. I am now living the dream, I never thought would be true!
Happy New Year 2004.
Happiness, health, and hope!
