4.13.01

Me again...who else would you expect. this week has been so hectic, i haven't had time to write in here, and i'm feeling so stressed because i haven't been able to vent. This whole thing with work is stressing me out the most. We've been sold to our competition, which is a bad thing for me, because they don't want to run the races live for awhile.....leaving my job obsolete. Anyhow, they did offer me another job (lucky me!) for a whole fucking $6.00 and hour! I couldn't live on that if i tried....even with 40 hours a week. These assholes come in, cut my pay in half.... infact more than half...and then...as if that weren't bad enough, won't even guarantee that if we run live again that i would get my old job as paddock judge back. What the fuck is wrong with these people? So, i called unemployment. What a joke. They didn't have all my information, (they were missing the last quarter of last year) so they couldn't even accurately tell me what i would get on unemployment. all they said was, "as of right now, what we're showing is that you would receive $200.00 a week" Well, damn it i can't live on that either! i'm so fucking screwed i feel like shooting myself. J came over last night. it was nice. He talked to me for hours, trying to console me and tell me everything was gonna be alright. I'm glad that he's there for me like he is, if he wasn't there i wouldn't know what to do, but just having him there to tell me everything's gonna be ok, (even though i know it's not) still makes me feel better. He gave me a back massage, then later on in the night we made some damn good lovin'.....i apologize yet again for not writing more....i'm so stressed right now.......i'll write as soon as i can...wish me luck, julie