I know more than one Mike. You wouldn't think, but it's quite a popular name for young men these days. Anyhow, so they don't feel left out I have included both of the Mikes I keep in touch with these days. The following is an amalgam of phrases I picked out of our icq histories. They are in no particular order and I hope this turns out humourous b/c it should if I do it right. Each colour is one person, but I won't tell you who's who. Just as an aside, I have two things to say. One: if either Mike is not cool with any of the quotes I put in, I will remove this page ASAP. Two: Mike and Mike have never met eachother so these "conversations" could never have taken place anyway.
What's with these homies dissing my girl?
They kept making fun of my friend for not trying to win a stuffed animal for his girlfriend.
Hey, my clones aren't evil, just me.
Oh yeah, that's right. I almost forgot. Then you can send an unsuspecting nice clone to do your dirty work.
Cause they're idiots!!!
I've never heard of them. They any good?
Shoppers employees get everything in the store at cost (which is VERY sweet... especially Life brand crap) and the starting pay is (or at least was) $7.90/hour. Not too shabby.
Indeed! He finds lots of cool stuff, like used dish rags and michael jackson lp's. He also finds the occasional gold tooth lost in a death match but he just throws them back, they're too classy for him...
Make his head explode. Do it. I want pictures.
Lootard extraordinaire is still online. I guess he's talking to all his other internet girlfriends (gag) all he did was insist i give him a pic so i messed with his head for a while. He thinks I'm humourous. I told him he was hot, nine out of ten grandmas agree. He didn't know what to think.
Ewwww.... nothing wrong with getting a little drunk.... except if it leads to the word grandma.
Do tell? :)
So you were a drunken bastard last night, eh?
I wish I could say I hear ya but...
... now people I went to high school with are trying to buy drugs from me, and suggesting I've already sold them to them. That's weird.
Marijuana is bad.
Bad in a good way (as in get down with your bad self) or bad in a bad way (as in grandma naked is bad).
I thought maybe you were offering profound cat advice. but I just remembered you're not a cat expert.
Good call.
I'll be wearing a tie-dyed poncho and chaps.
You could try and return it.
in the market... I don't remember the street but I can find out before Saturday.
Should I burn it?
Yeah... as long as they give me mine first!
SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN.
Excellent. Glad we could do business.
How cute, the cat is trying to force its claws under my door.
It's too bad cats are evil though... when will everyone learn...
Who told you that? I thought it was only known to members of the top-secret tool society. Oh wait, you're their leader...
Booo..... yeah stinkin' cats, Alf had the right idea. Heehee.... yeap yeap. He ate them all right, and how!
It's weird living with a cat, they cause noises at night that normally only humans would.
WELL..... not only is winnipeg host to the country's best corn, it also is known as the greenest city and the city with the cleanest air. Not to mention all the festivals, smiling faces, and 3-legged cats. It's a great city.
Three-legged cats...that sounds promising.
I don't have sex with cats, normally :(
You lead the life of a ninja. A ninja who feeds cats and coal-fired locomotives.
Your mom heard that.
And now she's a dirty marxist?
Oh, thanks for the clarification.
I've never met your mother but I'm sure she's a very nice lady...
Oh yeah. I'll send your mom home soon to tuck you in.... right after she tucks me in :)
Can't resist the Mike-enator's charms. No one, not even my mother, can. (or my father for that matter, but we won't go there).
Wow. They must have no souls. Come to think of it, neither do I.
Hey at least you have your knees.
Should I seek counselling?
Stop talkin' smack.
They just make things seem Wrong in a very funny way.
Are you sure that's not something else...
Crap, i've blown her cover!
Has she been fixed yet?
So are you intimating you were never a drug dealer?
Are you talking about Cutco?
Yup, whenever my ride gets his ass over here
I'm sorry to discover it this way.
Poor genitalialess thing :(
Prod.
Maybe I am crying or i would be if i wasn't to busy laughing at your incredible retardidity.
Wow, you can do two things at once.... i shall call you supertool.
I don't know these words. Pyromaniac, that i understand.
Indeed.... take advantage of it while you can...
Come on now, that's not a "dis" everyone's my mamas type...
Maybe and also lesbian icons.
I see... it sounds intriguing.
I made it up. Every word has to start somewhere doesn't it, like surveil on the x-files, as a short form of surveillance (although I personally don't agree with making a mockery of the english language by using a show with a cult following to change what's currently accepted. It's gotta be grass roots, yo)
You're my hero.
Hey hot stuff.... oops wrong person, I was just talkin with your Mom...
Your ears must be burning.
Yeah, agreed. I am so popular though.... too many mamas... too little time...
Look I just found one in my bedspread.
It happens. Try to pencil me in. I know i'm a little younger than your usual escort, but i don't charge much...
Hehe, I knew you couldn't resist.
To see my package?
You'd do a horse in a heartbeat, don't deny it.
Hehe, ya never know...
That might have some bearing on your suckiness.
Nothing like reading tributes to ppl you don't know :)
Really? i kinda like scabies.
I gave it a cookie.
Guess i better put my clothes back on.
Think of the children!
The unshowered, but amusement riding children.
I was going to add to this tonight, but the task is so daunting that tomorrow or the next day will have to suffice. I wanted to type in a some notes that one of the Mikes and I passed in our stats class, but I seem to have misplaced it. I'll look again after I see a little TV. (July 27)
I found them!!!! (but they're not as good as I remember, oh well I'll just give you some "funny" excerpts)
At this rate he'll have to speed up just to stop himself.
Please, ask a stupid question so he can repeat himself indefinitely.
For more fun from that same class, click here. Sorry, I think it's going to take a while to load the first time.
That's enough of this insanity. It's hurting my head flipping b/n so many windows. I think this was quasi-successful. I may add to it if I don't get sued by either Mike for defamation or something.