AUGUST 1967 - Page 2

I met him - Barnabas Collins - for the first time today, the man whose name evoked such terror in Maggie Evans. I went to see him at his house - a place the Collinses call "the Old House" as if it is a family shrine or some such thing. It certainly is an amazing place, painstakingly decorated down to the last detail to recreate how it must have looked more than a century ago (his century?) His servant, a Willie Loomis, appeared to be completely unnerved by my presence leading me to wonder just what this Mr. Collins was like and what he had done to terrorize the young man. It wasn't long before the subject in question appeared - a tall man with dark hair and dark eyes with an almost elegant demeanor. Could he really be the man who kidnapped the Evans girl? More importantly, could he really be what I have been looking for?

He proved to be completely uncooperative - severely polite as he firmly refused to even consider helping me with my "research". Does he know that I suspect him? Perhaps, perhaps….

He is a strange man - if he is a man at all - obviously entrenched in the past. His eyes were almost haunting, deep and stern and yet sadness lurked behind them, something he can't quite seem to conquer. I must find out more about him before I can proceed. (episode 287)

Another piece of the puzzle fell into place today. I am now relatively certain that Barnabas Collins is the creature I have been seeking - one who spans the gap between the world of the living and the world of the dead. I had noticed that there were no mirrors in his house when I was there yesterday. I managed to distract him today with an album of family portraits and then checked the mirror in my compact. As I suspected, Barnabas Collins has no reflection! If the legends are accurate, then he is the one…. (episode 288)

Had a very interesting conversation with Miss Winters in the wee hours this morning. It seems apparent that Barnabas Collins is trying to make her into Josette Collins - he has allowed her to wear Josette's dress and jasmine perfume (a strong scent) and has even given her a music box that belonged to Josette. Miss Winters seems quite entranced by the thing. I am more convinced than ever that I am on the right track - Maggie Evans spoke of a tinkling sound (the music box?) and a strong fragrance. Was Barnabas Collins trying to make her into Josette too?

* * * * * * *

I have found him at last! Barnabas Collins is exactly what I thought he was, just what I have been searching for, the link between the worlds of the living and the dead. I found his coffin shortly after dawn today, and when I lifted the lid, there he was, sleeping during the daylight hours as is required of a vampire. It was so exhilarating to discover that I was right! I will finally have the chance to proceed with my research. There were times that I thought this day would never come. A vampire! I so wanted to examine him - he truly appeared dead, so unlike he does in the evening when his whole being seems to radiate life. But I didn't dare disturb him or linger for more than a few moments. Now I must convince him that I can cure him. He is a stubborn man, but I must persuade him. I must! (episode 289)

Father always said that my determination would either earn me the Nobel Prize or get me killed. I narrowly avoided the latter this evening, but in so doing may well be on my way to the former. Barnabas Collins is a fascinating creature, but it is not terribly difficult to anticipate his actions. He came to my room to murder me tonight - he did indeed suspect me - but he underestimated me. I must say that he was quite surprised to find me waiting for him. And he is intrigued by my offer to cure him. But he is consumed by such fear that he is reluctant to trust me as proven by the bruise marks on my neck. He very nearly strangled me - not once but twice in the space of a few hours. But his interest in a cure is indicated by the fact that he did not kill me although he had every intention of doing so. I was forced to tell him about Maggie Evans in order to save my life, and I succeeded in convincing him that if he kills me, he will be found out. In the end, he allowed me to select a room at the Old House to utilize as a lab and to give his man Loomis a list of supplies that I require.

All in all, Barnabas Collins is quite an enigma - a mixture of the suave gentleman he once was combined with the frightful animal that he has become. He exhibits almost a bi-polar personality as the two so different natures war within him - sometimes one nature emerges as dominant, and at other times, the other nature takes over. Not to mention the difference between his nighttime and daytime personas. At night, he has so much life; his eyes flash with such heat and brilliance yet his touch chilled me to the marrow.

I will have to be very careful from now on. (episode 290-291)

We narrowly avoided disaster today - Maggie Evans escaped from Wyndcliffe and reappeared in Collinsport! I have no idea how she managed it, but Barnabas appeared at Collinwood accusing me of betraying him. I was able to get to the girl at Dave's office just as she was remembering everything! The hypnosis was quite successful, however. She will remember everything but the last few months. I will have to keep my eye on her to make sure that she never remembers what Barnabas did to her - otherwise, all that I have fought for will be ruined! (episode 295)

I am faced with more complications. Maggie Evans will be staying at home now, and I must prevail upon her not to reveal my true identity. Another ball to keep in the air as I proceed with my research. And I must keep reassuring Barnabas that she is not a threat to him. He seemed very frightened tonight, almost panicked. Another ball when what I really need to do is concentrate on the experiment. Ah, all in the name of science. I gave Barnabas an ultimatum- leave Maggie alone or I will expose him. We still don't trust each other, but I believe I have the upper hand. (Episode 296)

Barnabas' unwillingness or inability to concentrate on the experiment is proving quite a frustration to me. He can't seem to stay away from Vicki Winters. I can't have him hurting her - I refuse to go that far. But I interrupted them this evening as he was inviting her to the Old House. I warned him again that he can't have anything to do with her. I reminded him that she in love with Burke Devlin, something that he didn't want to hear. I also tried to tell Vicki that it would be best if she stayed away from Barnabas. She didn't believe that Barnabas is attracted to her. I painted him as a sensitive man who will be hurt if she encourages him. I think I got through to her. I hope so for her sake - and for the sake of my research. (Episode 299)

Despite my warnings, Barnabas continues his interest in Victoria Winters. He admitted to me that he was in her room last night and that he was tempted to make her as he is. The fool! I told him he must stay away from her or he risks being discovered. Perhaps our milestone today will help convince him - his heartbeat is normal and after only a few treatments! His progress surprises me but then I wasn't really certain of what to expect. I am breaking all kinds of medical ground with my research. He admitted today that although he has been skeptical about the experiment that he is beginning to believe it might actually work. He spoke of his desire to live a normal life. It is interesting to hear him speak this way for several reasons. He can be so cold, so cruel - to hear him speaking of being human again is surprising and even heartbreaking in a way. And he is so different from the vampires of legend and literature. Each of them are portrayed as reveling in their condition with no desire to return to a human state. Barnabas Collins remains an enigma to me…. (Episode 300)

Had a fascinating discussion with Barnabas about his little sister Sarah. He seems so gentle when he speaks of her - like the man he must have been, the adoring older brother. They must have had a very special bond. He admitted that he heard her in Maggie's room and that she stopped him from killing Maggie. It is amazing that she could have that effect on him. I have several concerns about the experiment at this point. I am worried that Barnabas' state of mind may threaten my success. And Vicki and Burke Devlin announced their engagement tonight. Barnabas was very upset. He questioned me about the timeframe for his cure - he desperately wants it to succeed so that he can have Vicki for himself. (Episode 302)

I am beginning to wonder about this place called Collinwood. The Collins family has so many secrets, more than they even know. There is an air of unrest on the estate, and yet in an odd way, I feel as if I belong here. Perhaps it is only because I have found what I have been seeking for so long. I had the opportunity to get to know little David better today. I took him for a walk in the hope that we might meet his friend Sarah, who if I am correct is the ghost of Barnabas' little sister. She didn't appear to us, but I had the feeling that she was very near. I think it would be very helpful for me to talk to her. She might be able to provide me with more insight on Barnabas, his psyche and how to keep him from doing something foolish. I came here in search of a creature of the night, but I may have found a ghost as well. I believe that Barnabas is making more progress medically. He said he felt strange tonight, weak. I am hoping that that is a positive sign. He is impatient with the experiment and with me, however. He knows that Burke Devlin is suspicious of him, and he equates him, quite irrationally, with his old rival, Jeremiah Collins. I tried to convince him that I can deal with Devlin, but I fear that he will take matters into his own hands. (Episodes 304/305)