In Name Only

Part 15

Her voice was quiet and Collins turned to face her, uncertain if he'd heard her correctly. The look in Natalie's eyes, the expression on her face, stopped him from his brusk reply. Joshua sat in the chair opposite Natalie and met her gaze.

"Natalie?"

"I... admit I do not love you, Joshua, and had it not been for the witchcraft, I would have refused to marry you, even for the sake of my brother's business interests, but... I cannot deny I have grown fond of you. We have shared so much, endured and survived so much that we cannot ignore the... connection, the bond we have established, one that can never be broken. Joshua, do you know why I never married?"

"I... assumed no man was able to tame you."

Natalie laughed bitterly and shook her head, smiling sadly.

"I suppose in part that is true, but even more true was the fact I wanted to be answerable to no one but myself; I did not want any man to think he had the right to deal with me as if I were a child, order me about and treat me as he wished simply because both our names appeared on the same document of marriage."

"Any man who tried that with you would be an utter fool."

Natalie chuckled and nodded her agreement. She glanced down at the drink she still held, then back up to once again meet Joshua's gaze.

"As I have grown older, I have often wondered if my decision not to marry was wise; not for any regrets about not having a family of my own - Josette was as much my own child as she would have been had I given birth to her. Since her death I have wondered more and more as I contemplated a life alone... I have been very lonely since her death, Joshua - except when I am with you."

Collins pulled in a long, deep breath and exhaled slowly. He carefully studied Natalie for a long moment, easily able to see the sincerity in her eyes. He blinked, unsure if he should ask what he knew he had to ask.

"Despite all that has happened here, all that you have endured... you wish to remain here?"

His voice held more than a trace of incredulity, and he was afraid to look away, certain that if he did, none of this would be real. Could Natalie really want to stay?

"Yes, Joshua, if you are able to accept me as I am and not become the utter fool you mentioned moments ago. I can promise you only challenging companionship, my rather eccentric form of affection, and... welcoming arms should you so desire."

Again Collins stared at Natalie. After what they had been forced to do, after her accusations of assault and rape - which had been true - she was still willing to fulfill her wifely duties? How could that be? Surely she was still being influenced by Angelique's witchcraft!

Natalie saw Joshua's expression, the doubt and disbelief in his eyes, and smiled. She knew she would probably offend his straight-laced, puritanical mores by what she was about to say, but she also had to be frank with him.

"Do not look so shocked, Joshua. Although we were both under the influence of witchcraft, I know not all of your... expertise could be Angelique's doing. You made me feel things I have not experienced in far too many years."

Collins blinked, then shook his head. He finally looked away, and after a few seconds, looked back toward Natalie.

"I... I do not know what to say. Are you certain - beyond any possible doubt - that you are no longer the victim of a witch's spell; you are no longer being used as her... plaything for her own amusement and... and..."

"Revenge, Joshua. No, I am not. I am thinking clearly and saying what I want to say."

"Tell me you are not playing a game as well; that you are not saying these things simply to... mislead the witch, to..."

"I could not be so cruel to you, Joshua. In a rather odd, perhaps even perverse way, I am grateful to Angelique."

"Why, in Heaven's name?"

Natalie put her brandy glass down and reached for Joshua's hands. She held them gently and met his gaze.

"For... forcing me to examine my life, my choices and for... awakening in me something I thought I had laid to rest long ago. Perhaps the more base, carnal desires I feel are not the soundest of emotions on which to base a relationship, but I do not deny them, nor do I deny my desire to experience them again - with you."

Collins glanced down at his hands, which were still held between Natalie's hands, then he again met her gaze.

"The decision is yours, Joshua. If... if you do not want me to stay, if you want nothing to do with me, I will understand, and return to Martinique as originally planned."

Joshua swallowed. He had never been a man to make impulsive decisions, he always carefully considered all aspects of a situation and made his decision based upon facts and his own good judgement, but in this he did not need time to consider or think. He moved his hands to they covered Natalie's.

"Stay. I would treasure your challenging companionship, delight in your eccentric affection, and... offer you welcoming arms in return. Natalie, I promise I will try not to become that utter fool."

Natalie smiled, then leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Joshua's cheek. He felt warmth and desire spread through him; a desire that had nothing to do with witchcraft and everything to do with Natalie's return to his life.

Standing, Joshua pulled Natalie to her feet and escorted her from the study. As they entered the foyer, Joshua spotted Ben Stokes in the drawing room, just straightening from depositing his load of fire wood.

 

"Stokes."

The servant turned to face Joshua Collins, his gaze resting on the Countess for a moment, then going back to Collins.

"Aye, Mister Joshua?"

"Would you see that the Countess'..."

Joshua glanced at Natalie, who smiled and nodded.

"... That Mrs. Collins' luggage is delivered to her room?"

"Aye, sir, I'll see to it right away. Then you'll be stayin', mam'e?"

"Yes, Ben, I will, and not because of anything that witch may have forced me to do, but because I want to."

 

Ben smiled widely and nodded.

"Aye."

Stokes gave them each a quick bow, then left to see to Natalie Collins'

bags. In the very depths of Hades, Angelique's scream of frustrated defeat echoed and bounced through the pits and caverns when she realized her plan had failed, and the marriage of Natalie duPres to Joshua Collins would never be in name only.

 

The End

(next chapter)

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