TTMABchapter5

All his friends
they�ve been tried for treason
and crimes that were never defined

Lance woke the next morning to see Justin already in his room. He blinked, and then smiled at Justin.

But something was bothering Justin. Lance could tell. First, Justin was never up this early, and second, he had a certain look in his eyes. Lance knew him well enough to just wait until Justin was ready to talk.

And he didn�t have to wait long.

�Uh, you know how I got a new doctor?� Justin asked quietly.

�Yeah,� Lance responded, �Chris, right?�

�Right. It was so weird, Lance,� Justin told him. He pictured Chris sitting in the chair next to his bed while he explained to Lance what had happened.

*Flashback*

Justin�s head snapped up as he heard a knock on his door. He knew it was probably his new doctor. And his hands shook with fear. He didn�t trust his shaking legs, so he said, �come in,� loud enough for Chris to hear him.

Chris entered, and Justin was a little surprised. He didn�t look big and mean like most of the doctors Justin had had before. Chris was short with spiky brown hair and warm, welcoming chocolate brown eyes.

�Hi, sorry I�m a little late,� Chris apologized.

�N-no problem,� Justin said, still nervous, but feeling more comfortable at the same time.

�So let�s cut to the chase. You are here for an eating disorder, anorexia, I believe. And I am going to fix you,� Chris stated.

Justin was shocked. No one had ever been so blunt and to the point before. This Chris guy was� different. �But wait, he�s going to fix me?� Justin thought, �he doesn�t know shit about me.�

�You don�t know shit about me,� Justin exploded, �I doubt you�ll be able to fix me.�

�Look, I know more than you think, buddy. I know what it�s like to look in the mirror and wish you could just loose five more pounds. Or what it�s like to see food and know you just can�t eat. I know what it�s like to feel that burn in your stomach, all the time. And I know how it feels when you eat, you feel like your stomach is on fire. I know, Justin, because I�ve been there,� Chris explained.

�Chris use to have an eating disorder?� Justin thought to himself. That�d never happened before either.

�Did you have to go to a crazy house too?� Justin asked, close to tears. Maybe someone would finally be able to understand him.

�For a short while, yes. I had a great doctor, and he saved me. Then I decided that I wanted to help other people the way he helped me,� Chris told Justin.

�You can really help me?� Justin questioned, wanting so badly to trust Chris. Another first.

�I am going to do my best,� Chris replied, bringing Justin to him in a hug as Justin began to sob.

*End Flashback*

�Your doctor had an eating disorder too?� Lance asked, very surprised.

�Yeah, isn�t that strange?� Justin said before adding, �I felt so comfortable around him. And you know how jumpy I usually am around people I don�t know.�

�Yeah,� Lance replied, wondering if maybe Jc would be able to understand him.

------

Jc walked down the hall, hoping that today would be the day when lance opened up to him. Ever since the night before when Chris had told him about the conversation he�d had with Justin and what had happened, Jc was feeling a little bit like a failure. He hadn�t gotten very far with Lance and they�d had many sessions already. And on his first try, Chris had gotten Justin to open up.

Jc scolded himself for being jealous and entered Lance�s room. Lance was sitting on his bed, staring out the window with a pained expression on his face.

�Lance,� Jc said, moving closer. He stepped next to Lance and put a hand on Lance�s shoulder.

Lance jumped and yelled out. He�d been daydreaming, thinking of his past. When he looked up at Jc, his eyes held a lot of pain and hurt.

�Are you ok?� Jc asked.

�I-I�m fine,� Lance replied, �I was just remembering.�

�Remembering?� Jc asked carefully, hoping Lance would give him some more information.

�Yeah,� Lance paused, and almost stopped there, but then he saw the look in Jc�s eyes. Jc actually cared; he wasn�t just there to earn his paycheck.

�You can talk to me Lance,� Jc assured him.

�I know. The only person I�ve ever told is Justin. It�s hard,� Lance said, trying to find the courage to tell Jc his story, or at least part of the story.

�I don�t want to rush you, take your time,� Jc told Lance, trying to make him more comfortable.

�Ok. Uh, I guess I better start with the fact that I�m gay. When I told my parents, they kicked me out of the house. I lived on the streets for a long time. All my friends are either in jail now or running from the law. I mixed with the wrong crowd I guess,� Lance told Jc, not being able to stop once he�d started.

�Anyway, I got beat up one night and I�ve been having dreams ever since. Horrible dreams.�

�I�m sorry that had to happen to you,� Jc said.

�Don�t pity me,� Lance spat out, his eyes quickly turning cold.

�I don�t pity you Lance, how could you say that? I just want to help you. Thank you for telling me all that. I�m glad you could trust me enough,� Jc replied, smiling at Lance, and wondering how in the world he was going to help him.