| Chapter 7 |
| Justin was shocked to see tears running down Lance�s face. �Lance, pull over, ok?� he said softly, and as soon as he�d pulled over, Justin pulled him into his arms. �What�s wrong?� he whispered. �I�m sorry, I just. I�ve never really had good friends Justin. People always acted like they were too good to be friends with me. It�s just� I feel so...� Lance trailed off, and Justin held him tighter. �I�m sorry that people never gave you a chance. But I have now, and I�ve been able to see what a wonderful person you are,� Justin told him. Lance sniffled and then pulled away, smiling at Justin. �Sorry about that.� �It�s ok,� Justin responded, smiling softly. �You can always lean on me, Lance, you know that.� �Yeah,� Lance said, and realized that they�d either lost Brandi and Josh, or they were pulled over behind them. �Oops,� he said, looking back to see that they were sitting patiently in Josh�s car. �Hey, it�s ok. They don�t mind. They�re probably wondering what�s going on though,� Justin replied. �Yeah, they can question us later. Let�s go,� Lance said, pulling back onto the road when traffic was clear. **** �Any idea what that was about?� Brandi asked Josh. �Not really. Looks like Lance was upset about something,� Josh said, judging from what he�d seen through the back windshield of the jeep. �Yeah. I wonder what, though,� Brandi replied. �I don�t know.� They sat in silence for a while, each pondering what had just happened between their friends. �So they�re becoming really close,� Josh said randomly, and Brandi was confused by his tone of voice. He didn�t really sound very happy about it. �Yeah, I think it�s great. Lance didn�t have many good friends in Indiana. I�m just happy that he found Justin. Otherwise, he�d be miserable,� Brandi told him. �Yeah, I guess.� �What�s wrong, Josh?� Brandi asked, curious and confused as to why Josh was acting the way he was. �It�s just, it seems like Justin doesn�t have any time for me anymore. He�s always hanging out with Lance or talking about him,� Josh admitted. �You need to tell Justin that you feel that way,� Brandi said, placing her hand on Josh�s. �If he knows how you feel, I�m sure he�ll spend more time with you.� �I don�t want to force him to spend time with me. It�s like he�s trying to replace me because he found someone better,� Josh replied. Brandi was silent for a moment. She was trying to figure out if Josh was talking about Justin being his friend or something more. It sounded a lot like Josh wanted Justin to be more. "Josh, do you like, want Justin? As more than a friend?� she questioned. �Wait-� she interrupted herself seconds later, �don�t answer that. I�m sorry, that�s none of my business.� �It�s ok. I�m bi, so it�s not like I�m disgusted by what you said or anything. And I have occationally thought about Justin that way. It�s hard not to, he�s a beautiful person inside and out. But we�re better as friends, trust me,� Josh explained. �Do you really believe that? Or are you just saying it?� Brandi pressed. �Honestly? I don�t know. I�m not sure what to do anymore. All I know is that Justin is slipping away, and I don�t want to let him go,� Josh said. **** In Lance�s car, Justin and Lance were talking about Josh and Brandi. �So you think there may be something between them?� Justin asked curiously. �I�m not sure, but it�s possible,� Lance replied. �Because Josh couldn�t stop talking about her and how nice she was when we got back from the party a few weeks ago,� Justin pointed out. �Yeah, Brandi said a lot about him too. But she thinks-� Lance started to say, but he stopped himself. �She thinks what?� Justin asked curiously. �Um, she thinks that Josh is gay,� Lance told Justin. �Oh no, he likes girls, trust me. He�s bi, I think,� Justin replied. �You think?� Lance pressed. �Well, he told me he experimented with a few guys before, but it�s never lasted. So it�s not like he�s really *dated* a guy. Just messed around,� Justin explained. �Ohh, ok. So you said you�d never had a boyfriend. Have *you* messed around?� Lance questioned. Justin blushed, and Lance was embarrassed that he�d asked such a nosy question. �Sorry, you don�t have to tell me,� Lance said, blushing a little himself. �No, it�s ok. I did once, with some guy I hardly knew. But we didn�t go very far,� Justin admitted. �Oh.� �I just wasn�t ready,� Justin explained further. �Yeah, I know what you mean.� �So anyway. You think Brandi is interested in Josh?� Justin asked. �Yeah, I think it�s possible. She talks about him enough. And I know she thinks he�s hot. And who could blame her, right?� Lance said, laughing. Justin didn�t reply. �Oh, I�m sorry. You�ve probably never thought about that because he�s your best friend.� �I have actually, when we first met. He�s a very handsome guy, but he�ll never think of me as more than a friend. I gave up on my little crush a long time ago,� Justin admitted. �Yeah, crushing on your friend sucks big time. You�re never sure whether to tell them because you don�t want to ruin the friendship. But on the other hand, you really want to be with them,� Lance said softly. �Yeah, exactly. I hated feeling like I couldn�t talk to him because I might have slipped and told him how I felt. Our friendship was kind of strained for a while. Then I just gave up and got over him. It was much better after that,� Justin explained. �That�s good,� Lance replied, smiling over at Justin. Justin returned the smile. �So what about you?� �What about me?� �Yeah, have you messed around with guys?� Justin asked. �Well, with my boyfriend, yeah. We had sex a few times, but I was kind of rushed into it,� Lance admitted quietly. �He forced you?� Justin gasped. �No, well kinda. I didn�t say no, but I didn�t want it either,� Lance said. �Why didn�t you say no?� Justin pressed, feeling for his friend. �I was scared that he�d leave me, and I didn�t want to be alone. Then, when I had to move, I told him and he freaked. Now I�m just happy that I�m not with him anymore,� Lance explained. �I�m sorry.� �Hey, it�s not your fault. I just know now that it�s better to feel a little lonely than to be in a relationship you�re not ready for,� Lance replied. Justin reached over and grabbed Lance�s free hand, squeezing it softly. Lance looked over at Justin and smiled slightly. Justin smiled back, letting go of Lance�s hand, but Lance held tight. Justin looked surprised, but he didn�t object or pull his hand away. �So what�s it like?� he asked, still holding onto Lance�s hand. �What is what like?� �Sex with a guy.� �You want me to explain it to you?� Lance asked. �Well, no, but�� Justin trailed off, not really sure *what* he was asking. �It�s just� different, obviously,� Lance said, not really sure how to explain. �Yeah, ok. Sorry, I was just curious.� �Hey, it�s ok. But I�m not really that experienced myself.� �You�re more experienced than me,� Justin pointed out. �Yeah, well, I�d rather not have the memories that I do concerning that,� Lance told Justin. �Sorry.� �Stop apologizing, Justin,� Lance said, squeezing his hand, �it�s ok. You�re curious. That�s a good thing.� Justin smiled when Lance looked over at him. �I like that we can talk about anything, Lance. Besides Josh, I�ve never had a friend that I feel so comfortable around. And it�s amazing cause we�ve only know each other for a few weeks,� Justin said. �Yeah,� Lance agreed, �we�re a good team.� They smiled at each other again. Their conversation stopped there as Justin turned up the radio and began singing at the top of his lungs. Lance had to grin. He knew Justin was curious, and he probably wondered what they would be like together. Lance sure as hell had, and he hoped that they could find out. But he wanted Justin to be serious about it. He knew he was thinking ahead, since neither of them had admitted any feelings yet, but he didn�t want to be hurt again or hurt Justin himself. |
| Chapter 8 |