| Chapter 4 |
| Lance decided to ask Justin why he was the one Justin went to all the time. It was the next day, and the funeral was only two days away. Justin had just finished his cereal, and Lance was reading the paper. Once he finished, he looked up to find Justin staring at him. Lance smiled, putting down the paper. �Hey, Justin, want to go for a swim?� he asked, motioning outside. �Sure,� Justin replied, smiling back a little before getting up to get his bathing suit on. Lance wasn�t sure if it was a good idea to swim, because then he�d have to stop himself from staring at Justin�s chest, but he wanted to get out of the house. They met outside a few minutes later, both jumping right into the pool. The water was very refreshing, and they swam laps silently for a while. Finally, Lance found the courage to ask Justin his burning question. �Hey, Jus?� he asked, treading water near Justin. �Yeah?� Justin asked, stopping where he was and turning to look over at Lance. �Can I ask you something?� Lance questioned, swimming over to the shallow end where he could stand. Justin followed him. �Of course, you can ask me anything Lance,� Justin replied, looking at Lance curiously. �Ok. Well, I was wondering why, you know, why you always come to me,� Lance admitted, stuttering a little. �Oh, I�m being annoying, aren�t I? I knew you�d get sick of me. I�m sorry Lance-� Justin rambled, but Lance interrupted him. �No, that�s not it. You�re not annoying. I love spending time with you. I was just wondering why you picked me to go to,� Lance clarified. �Well, I don�t know really. I mean, you were there from the start, ya know?� Justin responded, and Lance felt his heart sink. He�d been hoping for something more, even thought he knew it wouldn�t happen. �Plus, you know, I�ve always felt this connection with you,� he finished. �You have?� Lance whispered excitedly. He hoped Justin couldn�t sense his excitedness. �Yeah,� Justin replied in the same hushed tone. He moved closer to Lance so their bodies were almost touching. �Is this ok?� he asked cautiously, searching Lance�s eyes for disgust or fear. But all he found there was love. �Yes,� Lance said softly, letting their lips brush together slowly. �Are you sure?� Justin asked, pulling back. He looked so nervous. �Are *you* sure?� Lance replied. �No,� Justin sighed, looking away. �Hey, Justin, I don�t want anything to happen without you being sure, ok. I don�t want you to think I�m doing anything out of pity for you, ok? I love you, more than you know,� Lance said carefully, not wanting to hurt Justin. �I�m sorry, Lance, I just thought that-� Justin started, but he didn�t finish. �Thought what, Justin?� Lance questioned. �Well I noticed you staring at me and I thought maybe you wanted this,� he said softly, refusing to look at Lance. �You don�t know how much I want this, Justin,� Lance responded, bringing his hand to Justin�s chin and turning his head so they were looking straight into each other�s eyes. �But do you?� �I�m not sure,� Justin cried, tears coming to his eyes. �Hey, Jus, it�s ok. Please don�t cry,� Lance begged, pulling Justin into his arms. �Everything�s going to be all right.� �Promise?� Justin asked. �Yeah, I promise,� Lance replied, knowing that he�d try his hardest to make everything become ok for Justin. **** Two days later, Lance found himself with an armful of sobbing Justin when he woke up. Justin had crawled into his bed, crying, and waking him up. Lance let Justin snuggle up into his arms, not knowing what else to do. They had the funeral to go to that day, and it was a hard time for them all. Justin�s aunt read the eulogy, and he cried silently the whole time. It was so beautifully written, and he whispered to his mom that he wanted a copy of it to keep for himself. After the funeral, everyone gathered outside, exchanging hugs and loving words. Justin saw many relatives that he hadn�t seen in years, and Lance was there to meet them all. After the funeral, they returned to Justin�s house, almost his entire family joining them, and had lunch there. Justin quickly grew tired of conversing with his relatives, and retreated to his room. Lance followed soon after, as he was running out of things to talk about with Justin�s family. He knocked softly on Justin�s door and entered when he heard Justin reply. �Hey,� Lance said, sitting down next to Justin on his bed. �Hey, sorry I left you down there with my family,� Justin apologized. �I just couldn�t stand it anymore, you know?� �Yeah, it�s ok. I didn�t mind really. I just wanted to come up and see how you were doing,� Lance assured him. �I�m doing better, actually,� Justin replied, �now that you�re here.� Lance smiled at the added comment at the end. �So what do you want to do now?� �Could you go find the other guys and we could all watch a movie up here?� Justin asked. �Sure,� Lance replied, wishing they could spend more time alone, but not wanting to go against what Justin had requested. �I�ll be right back.� |