| Chapter 6 |
| though he was exhausted from the day's rehearsal, jc took the long way home. as he drove more or less aimlessly through orlando, he thought about what he had just witnessed in the warehouse as justin helped lance learn the dance steps. there was definitely something cooking between lance and justin. jc wasn't really sure what to make of the boys' relationship. rationally, he could explain away some of the closeness between the two: maybe it was a result of lance having stayed with justin when he came to florida with his mother, or maybe they were close simply because they were close in age. whatever the reason, something [was] there. and jc didn't like it. at all. then jc realized he was already pulling into the parking lot of his apartment, even though he hadn't meant to come home just yet. he parked, then let himself into his apartment and headed for his room. flopping back on his bed, jc thought about why he disliked the closeness between justin and lance. he knew it was because he was jealous. jc looked over to his dresser. on it sat a framed photo of the cast of the new mickey mouse club, and 12-year-old justin grinned back at him from it. jc sighed and tried to fight the memories, but they flooded over him despite his best efforts. jc remembered the first day he'd met the curly-haired, blue-eyed, confident boy named justin. his mother had hovered around as justin met the rest of the cast, and jc had picked up justin's distinct momma's-boy vibe, but justin held his own with the rest of the MMC kids. if ever they tried to tease him about his mom, justin just flashed them his grin, the one that made girls swoon and guys unable to do anything except smile back. some guys even swooned a little themselves. jc had been one of those guys. jc remembered the day he had caught justin in a rare moment of weakness way back in the beginning, when justin didn't really know anyone -- not that jc did, but he was older, so that helped him. justin had been sitting alone on the set fighting sniffles of homesickness, and jc had found him. jc had invited him to join the others who were going to get something to eat, but justin just sniffled that he wanted to be alone. jc had ignored him and had instead sat down at the floor at justin's feet, formally introducing himself as "josh number two, so i go by jc." that had brought a smile to justin's pouting pink lips, so jc continued chatting with the boy to cheer him up. in no time, justin's funk had passed -- and he'd attached himself to jc. jc remembered how he and justin had become inseparable both on and off the set, despite the difference in their ages. justin's mom liked jc, too, so she let her son do things with him that she probably wouldn't have otherwise. jc hated that the adoring eyes that justin had always turned towards him were now trained on lance and only lance. jc knew the look that made justin's sunny grin even sunnier -- justin was in love. and he wasn't in love with jc. not anymore. jc remembered the days when justin [was] in love with him. they were sunshine-filled days when justin wanted nothing more than to be close to jc and jc felt the same way. there had only been one moment where things had, as jc had said at the time, "gotten out of hand" and they had kissed. jc had never forgotten it, though justin seemed to have. it had been late afternoon when it happened, and the rest of the cast had gone home for the day. jc had lingered, waiting for justin who was doing something in the back, and when he'd finally appeared, justin's eyes had lit up when he saw that jc had waited for him. in a moment of innocent adoration, justin had thrown his arms around jc and kissed his best friend's cheek. then justin had pulled back, grinning, and jc had leaned in and kissed him. for real. there was nothing innocent about that kiss. jc remembered it as he lay there on his bed. he remembered the sparkle in justin's blue eyes, a sparkle jc was sure would always be his. he'd been wrong. it wasn't his anymore. jc had stopped things between him and justin because justin was so young. he had trusted that their love wouldn't fizzle, that it would grow as they grew and that one day, when they were both older, they'd really be able to be together. he'd told justin all of this, and the boy had looked at him with wide trusting eyes, nodding. because jc could do no wrong. not even break justin's heart by pushing the younger boy away. well, jc's plan was no longer any good. justin wanted lance, not jc. and it stung. jc rolled over and buried his head in his pillow, willing himself not to cry over the loss of justin's affections. in the new group, still unnamed, a relationship between two of its members wouldn't work. he knew it. it wouldn't work for him and justin, and it wouldn't work for justin and lance. [not as long as i have something to say about it], jc thought bitterly. |