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| Full Name: Robert Michael Hayden Esquire III |
| Nickname(s): Bob |
| Age / Birthday: 20, 4/17/84 |
| Mode of Transportation: A car with a Bad Religion bumper sticker |
| Hobbies: Frequent masturbation, though I'm trying to move away from that. |
| Favorite murder weapon: 8'' black cock |
| Favorite movie: BASEketball |
| Favorite Band/Singer: Bad Religion |
| Significant Other: None. He used to have Tins's name written here. but it said beana after tina. ha ha, what a fucking pansy he was. - Joe |
| Job: Wal-Mart (In Kirkwood, because I'm high class) |
| Favorite Sexual Position: Praying mantus into the flailing lotus tuck with a reverse bronco-buck/texas twister finish |
| Advice for youngins' : You won't go blind. |
| How I came to know Joe: Joe rescued me from three ruthless bandits intent on raping me.... And then he raped me. |
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| Bob's 2002 Lancer, complete with the Bad Religion sticker. |
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