[SCENE]
Lynx Madison is sitting at a computer screen...

[LYNX MADISON]
You know as week's go I can't say that mine has gone too bad! That's right Madisonites, you're friendly neighbourhood Hearsay is back on the old internet box to give you an honoured look into my thoughts... Hey I've taken the time to write up this piece of crap, the least you spotty little moron's can do is read it!

So I went into last week thinking about the possibility of taking on an EWE hall of famer. Former undisputed champion, ewe champion... Yada yada yada. All of those things surely must have made me think that there may be a slight chance that Snake would be a test for me. Maybe he would push me to my limits, give me a real workout in the ring... Unfortunatley... Well I say unfortunatley, it was for him, it was none of the above. Infact I'd go so far to say that it was a walk in the park for your's truly. Snake proved once again in my eyes that he is yet another washed up hasbeen wandering the halls of the EWE. He's taking up valuble locker space that could be used for my... jock! Snake is added to my list of beaten opponents, and to his honour becomes only the second man to have a "(x2)" next to his name... Did I mention during the build up to our match that I'd beaten him before... I did? Well it's true.

Moving swiftly along, because to be honest I don't have much time at the moment to spare... Listening to my damn agent talking about how you scum sucking marks buy my t-shirts and other merchandise, and if that goes up I get a bonus payment from the office... Should advise you also that a new t-shirt is in production and will be released on ewe.com in the very near future... But back to what I was saying originally, moving swiftly along we have my match this week. I've been teamed with four other guys to take on "Team Chaos" this Monday night. The Chaos team are heading to Final Cut to take on a team from Wednesday nights for the rights to call themselves masters and comanders of the universe or something, but what has that got to do with me? Everything now it seems, as I've been added to their list of opponents so that they can have a true test heading into the pay-per-view. I've got Edge, Benji Homan, Slade Craven and Gavin Masterson as partners. We'll be up against K~Dawg, Johnny Nitro, Gino Knoxx and Ciaran Michaels. Then throw into the mix the mystery fifth member of the team, and you've got a pretty formidable force... Well you will have at Final Cut. This week they're up against those four guys and more importantly ME! That's right because lets be honest here people... I'm going to be the one that carries the team to victory on Monday night, it will be me doing the majority of the eliminating.

K~Dawg... You get to enter the special "(x2)" squad that I talked about earlier. Ciaran... You've got a belt right now don't ya? International Champion and Tag is it? Wow, you've done well for yourself since I last beat you... Remember that one? I do! You can join Scotty, Kurtis and Snake in the "(x2)" club too I guess. Gino? Never been in the ring with you my man, although we've been around each other a bit in the past. I remember back when we were in "A"nother "W"restlng "O"rganisation that you were the top dog for a while... How you doing now? Tag Champion is nothing to be sniffed at, and you'll make a good addition to my beaten list. You'd be quite the scalp! Johnny Nitro... Mid-Eastern Champion! On your team is the tag team partner of the guy you beat for that very title... Not trying to stir anything up there, it's just an observation I made. You've beat up Scotty before, and you magically become his replacement after Scotty gets hurt... You hear what I'm saying Kurtis? Last but no least, the Mystery Man! Hailing from parts unknown, just a stone's throw from Dudleyville! Mystery Man really has me worried! He's doing such a good job keeping his identity a secret that he's not even come out in the lead up to this event to declare himself a member of this all conquering team... Should be good when I pin each and every one of you, then I'll go back to the locker room and knock on Steve Austin's door and utter the timeless classic... Sucks to be you!

It's a big night for Monday Night Chaos, and an even bigger night for me. It's yet another night that I show the entire company that I am what I say I am, I am the real deal. I am destined for great things, and it's coming sooner rather than later. Right now though equally as important is that I get to show Johnny Choas what I'm all about. I seriously thought about not even mentioning you in here Johnny, but I thought it would only be right to answer your little "Extreme Rules" challenge. Was it supposed to scare me? Am I know supposed to be worried that the "Extreme One" will be coming after me in his signiture match, to show everyone that now he has morals that he can still whoop some ass... I'm not even the slightest bit worried, if anything I'm happy! It means that I can do things to you now that I would have been disqualified for in a regular match. Chairs? Legal! Tables? Legal! Barbed Wire? Legal! The list could go on Johnny, but I'm sure you know that. I'm finally going to beat some sense into that thick skull of yours, I'm not doing this to hurt you... Well I am... But I mean in the mental way! I'm doing this to you to teach you a lesson. Are these people going to help you up when I crack you over the head with a kendo stick? Are the fans going to mop your forehead when the blood is flowing after a vicious shot from the ring bell? The people don't care Johnny, they pay for you to perform like a puppet. Only problem with you now is that you're asking them how high to jump, and looking for rewards from them when you do as you're told. You're like a little puppy dog... You and your wife and your sister... Well... Your wife and sister are just plain dogs, but talking about how mentally and physically retarded your wife and next of kin are is irrelovant. What matters is Johnny that you watch me on Chaos. Watch me take apart the so called cream of the locker room, and think if I can beat them as badly as I will... What will I do to you when there are no rules?

[SCENE]
Lynx clicks send as we fade to black...