Inside the Apes Lair

Welcome to the portion of the site where we interview one of your favorite Apes and ask them a series of questions based on the questionnaire devised by the brilliant Champagne Charlie.

This weeks special ape is none other than "Lazer" Marc Rich

CC:  What is your favorite word?

MR:  Douche....... without a doubt

CC:  What is your least favorite word?

MR:  "Sudamericana"-bunch of douchebags

CC:  What turns you on?

MR:  My 5ft 10in tall beautiful girlfriend, hi honey, I know you will be reading this soon  

CC:  Level with us Marc, everyone says your girlfriend, and quite honestly we respect that but we are trying to sell adverts with this program so work with us OK?

MR:  OK, well that one is easy......a sweaty Ashley Judd in Time to Kill. Fuckin hot!   I have a free pass from my girlfriend for Ashley.  I know what you all are thinking ......Keep dreamin like that will ever happen. But if it does, no questions asked. I have a free pass!

CC:  What turns you off?

MR:  Ugly feet and Kankles

CC: What noise or sound do you absolutely love?

MR:  Everyone has seen that Miller Lite commercial with the two hotties going at it(cat fight). Well just imagine them making up

CC: What noise or sound do you absolutely hate?

MR:  That splashy foamy noise when a keg is kicked

CC:  F'n quality response mate.  I gotta believe all our faithful readers can agree with that response.

CC:  What profession, other than amateur footballer, would you like to try?

MR:  Brewmaster...there would be no better feeling than making the perfect pint. Plus you get to drink at will.

CC:  What is required for membership in the Apes Drinking Club?

MR:  You have to love beer, if you don't love beer, get out! No baileys on the rocks GAndy.

CC:  What profession, other than member of the Apes Drinking Club, would you absolutely not want to participate in?

MR:  A defender on the Colombian National Soccer Team...we all remember when he scored an own goal vs the US in the World Cup.  10 Bullet Holes later....

CC:  What is your favorite curse word?

MR:  That's an easy Fuckin question

CC:  If heaven exists, what would you like "god" to say to you when you reach the pearly gates???

MR:  So Marcus....how was it f#@king Ashely Judd